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Darrel Curtis wasn't always such a cold person. He didn't always shove people away. He didn't always refuse to open up to them. He didn't always refuse to get attatched to them in any way possible. He didn't always occupy himself with work not only to supply for his brothers, but to distract himself from the countless possibilities of dissapointment and hurt that could be brought from this world. But, there was once a time. A time where he was the most empathetic person one could ever meet. A time where he would never even think about hitting his brother. A time where he was just Darry. Darry, in love with his best friend. Darry, who cared for his family and gang more than anyone in the world. Darry, who would give money to homeless people on the streets, despite not having much under his name at all.
When Paul Holden walked into Darrel's life during their freshman football season in 1959, Darrel had no idea that the boy would leave a vast, absolutely irrevocable impact on him. When he caught himself thinking of the boy constantly, he knew he was in for a long, eventful ride. Greasers never, ever went with Socs, let alone a boy with another boy. It was just not how Tulsa worked. Not how the world worked. Not in the 1960's.
This didn't stop Darry from opening the door to his heart, however. Something about Paul's lively, entrancing eyes must have changed the way Darry was programmed. One look from those eyes made his heart pound, palms get clammy, voice get unstable. Even the thought of the boy made Darry forget what he was going to say. So, he let him in.
They talked, and talked. Until they were practically inseperable, intertwined, sewn together. Then, chaos was unleashed into Darry's life. He left his lover after his own parents left the world, and he spent his days stressed, constanly working two jobs to supply for his brothers. Being stuck between the role of a brother and a father at the ripe age of 20 will sure mess one up. Paul never returned. And Darrel's life became torture.
Months later, events only got worse, something Darrel truly believed was impossible. His youngest brother seemed to hate him, when he was only trying his best to manage his stressful life. It didn't help when Ponyboy got brutally jumped by no other than Paul and his friends. The lives of forever sixteen and seventeen year old Johnny Cade and Dallas Winston were lost shortly after, not only impacting Ponyboy's mental health, but the whole gang's at that. There was absolutely nothing Darrel could do. He was stuck. Helpless.
Since then, Darrel would never let anyone in. Not after seeing what love could do to someone. Not after feeling what Paul made him feel- a strong, yearning desire for a boy he could never truly have, followed by a heartbreak incomparable to any other from an argument with the boy. Back when the couple was together, they never thought their moments of happiness would end. That was short lived, however. That night where they argued like a drunk, married couple would change both of their lives.
Darry thought he would never have good love. Nothing Gold Can Stay, that Robert Frost poem that he once heard Pony recite, confused about the meaning. Darrel knew, though. The poem's message was how good things could never stay. Just like sunsets. As the large, golden star rises up from the horizon every morning, a beautiful view appears in the sky. The beauty of a sunrise truly is unlike anything else. But it doesn't last. It never does. Minutes later, as the sun continues to rise, the colors fade away, and the sight is gone. Dawn goes down to day. Beautiful, great things won't ever remain. Good times are temporary, but so are bad ones.
So, as all the chaos is settling down, Darry cannot help but let him in again. Seeing those lively, entrancing eyes belonging to his only lover standing at his doorstep, some uncontrollable force brings them back into Darry's room, talking like how they would back when they were "a thing."
And so, to both of their satisfaction, they got back together. Their time apart only made the couple stronger. They learned. Learned things they never would have if not having previously separated. Now, as they laid on Darrel's soft bed, Paul's head resting on his boyfriend's chest, they talked, and talked. Talked as that large, golden star went under the horizon, and back up hours later.
However, both the boys had a rather difficult time adapting at first. As they kissed, they couldn't help but wonder when the other would leave. Because clearly, nothing gold can stay. But maybe, just maybe, this time gold can stay. And this was gold.
"How long will you stay this time?" Paul asked as they sat, watching the large, golden star once again.
"Not long, my love. Not a lot, just forever." Darrel replies truthfully, planting a gentle kiss on his boy's head.
And that's how it all ends. Two boys, madly in love. Intertwined into one another. Sewn together. Permanently this time.