Work Text:
We were playing in the sand
Mother and I always visited the beach on gloomy days. She’d lay on a striped towel, her face obscured by a beach umbrella, a hat or a pair of tinted glasses. The days were gray and the water might have been cold but I liked it that way
And you found a little band
When mother did come into the water with me she would lead me by the hand. She would reach into the water and pull out a closed shell. When she opened it, little wonders would be inside and once I was finished marveling she would close the shell and throw it back into the sea. As we walked back to shore she told me that one day I would be able to do that too.
You told me you fell in love with it, hadn’t gone as I planned
Despite the time we spent together, mother was always distant. Deep down I felt she cared more about those shells in the sea than me. She leaves tomorrow and now I can't help but think I am the reason why.
When you had to bid adieu
I came to say goodbye to mother the day she left. I came carrying a large suitcase filled with my belongings, believing I was coming with her. When I did see mother she was talking to a woman and giving her money. Mother said I was going to stay with the woman when she was gone.
Said you’ll never love anew
The woman brought me to her home, which was littered with toys, clothes and beds, it was also littered with kids and helpers of all ages. I didn’t know what that meant back when I was a child but I know now. Mother wasn’t coming back.
I wondered if I could hold it and fall in love with it too
I opened my suitcase and in it found my belongings. All my clothes, pairs of shoes but something i never thought to see. One of the shells mother had opened to show me wonders. I grasped the shell tight in my little hands and tried to open it but to no avail. I remembered that one day my mother said that I could do that, so I'll wait.
You told me to buy a pony but all I wanted was you
I’m 18 now; My birthday was celebrated by the staff, not because they see me as a growing person but because I am officially an adult and now, I have to fend for myself. The one person I felt that was in my corner this whole time was the woman that brought me here in the first place, so as I said goodbye to her she handed me something. A bill to a plot of land and an envelope full of money. She said these were left for me by my mother and not to give them to me until I'm 18. I walk out into the world, I don't know where she is or who she was but I know Mother will always be with me.