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The fake town was kind of nice, all things considered.
In layout, it reminded Pomni a lot of Venice. Waterways had sectioned off the town into four broad squares. Gondolas cruised slowly through them as mannequin NPCs took each other for rides. A lot of the building faces had German style shutters and accents, with massive windows that would catch the sunlight from all angles. It seemed fitting for something Caine would make— an eclectic blend of architectural data, all combined to generate this one walkable space.
It was really, truly something special.
Pomni swung her arms as she walked. She had her head turned to watch a few leaves coasting through the water, their surfaces bobbing and twirling about. There was one in particular, speckled in gold and deep red, that had made her think more than once about stooping down to grab it. Instead, the jester finally looked away, content to let it find its way into the ocean.
“So… any theories on what Caine wants us to find over here?”
It was the first time she’d spoken to Jax since they got to this section of the town. He, himself, had spent the majority of their exploration in silence. There were a few things that had piqued his interest- like the balloon animal NPC from a few hours ago- but he had otherwise left all of the curiosity to her. She didn’t quite mind it, honestly.
So when Jax leaned down to be eye level with her, and lifted his hand to point off to her right, she was shocked. There was a path there now, and at the end of said path sat a large, pink-painted building. It was very obviously cat-themed. Dormers atop the attic acted as the ears, with eye-shaped windows beneath them. Big, cutesy letters reading Feastin’ Feline’s Cafe were plastered on the building’s front, tucked between thick black rods.
“I dunno,” Jax teased. “That seems pretty inconspicuous to me, don’t ya think?”
Pomni blinked. “...Huh.” The building stuck out like a sore thumb, but it was still incredibly cute, and reminiscent of something Gangle would design. She turned to face it in full— “Guess that’s us, then”— and began to head down the path.
Honestly, a cafe was going to be pretty nice. Pomni found herself excited as they got closer to the building; eating might not really work the same in the Circus, but this place looked full of treats, and she could get a sweet tooth at the drop of a hat.
The sight of a cat sitting in the window made her stop dead in her tracks. Jax lightly bumped into her, and she could see his reflection in the glass as he considered both her and the cat. Then, he smirked.
“What’s the matter? Cat got your tongue?” It earned him a quick, unamused stare.
Pomni stared at the cat, watching its tail lift and curl idly. It was waiting on her— adorable, yes. But…
…Screw it. Maybe she’d escaped the limitations of her immune system after coming to the Circus. Maybe it’d be fine. Maybe she could actually hold and love a cat, now.
"Nope." She commented in reply to Jax, and headed right for the door. It gave a pleasant chime as she pulled it open… and then her bravado was absolutely stomped upon. The second she took a breath, she sneezed, and it was all over from there. "Aghhh, are you serious??" The jester hissed. "I don't even have a nose!!"
Jax chuckled mirthfully from behind her. "Ah. I see now. Allergies. Boy, you really aren’t gonna love this one, are you? Maybe we should head back.”
Pomni frowned. A helpful memory from before they entered the portal replayed in her mind– Caine floating before it, his finger in the air as he proudly declared, “Something special is waiting for each of you, but you’ll both have to overcome something in order to find it! Good luck!”
The jester clenched her fists, grumbled out a “No.”, and took her first steps into the cafe lobby. Jax watched her enter, whistling low.
“Boy, that’s a spirit.”
He took one long stride and easily passed her with a bump, his voice louder then. “Well, you said it, Pomni. Fake allergies aren’t gonna ruin our little corner of this world, yeah?” A cluster of cats had started to form on the cafe tables, and as Jax approached them, they butted their heads against his open palm. He reached out and boldly scooped one up, holding it out towards Pomni with a mirthful grin. Its orange, circular eyes blinked once. “I mean, just look at them! Aren’t they adorable?”
Pomni flinched back like he’d offered her a ball of fire. “Yeah, you know, the cuteness was never the pro-o-ACHOO!” On top of the table to her right, a curious shorthair sprung backwards at the sudden noise. Another wasn’t deterred, swiping at the bells on her hat. Pomni scrubbed at the skin where her nose would be, before her pinwheel eyes flicked downward. There was a gray cat weaving around Jax’s ankles, looking up at him longingly. Despite her current predicament, Pomni smiled. “Aww, t-that one’s jealous.”
Jax looked down at the little creature, and decided to place the one he was holding on his shoulders. To both of their surprise, it stayed put, keeping balance even as Jax stooped down to grab the gray one. There was an entire circle of cats forming around him now, all their little eyes focused solely on Jax. He sweatdropped comically, slowly turning to scour all of them. “...You know, I’m starting to think all of them are.”
“Better you than me.” Pomni smirked despite it all. Her hat shifted, and she looked over to see the same shorthair having hooked its claws into the fabric. Before she could try to free it, the little stinker hopped right up onto her head, standing tall and proud as the others revered it with comical levels of awe. Pomni herself winced, watching the cat’s tail drift in front of her face… “Uh oh.”
She had just enough foresight to snag the little kitty before the sneezing fit began, preventing it from tumbling off her head and hitting the floor. It mrow’ed sharply, squirming free of her hands and hopping back onto the table. The crowd of cats stared at her as she sneezed repeatedly, trying to turn to face somewhere where there wasn't a cat.
“God- #@$%ing-" She hissed between sneezes, barely able to cover her mouth. A particularly heavy one took her to the floor, scaring away yet another cluster of cats. They regrouped beside Jax, all of them watching the scene.
Jax burst out laughing. He hadn’t entirely meant to, and it, too, scared away a few of his furry companions, but dammit, he couldn’t help himself. He had to hold his stomach before long, unable to tear his eyes away from Pomni.
Only when he was calmed down mostly enough did the rabbit kneel down to the floor next to her, trying to stifle his giggling and wipe the tears from the corners of his eyes. He reached out a hand only part way before dragging it back. "Are.. oh my god, Pomni, are you “good?”
Pomni wasn't unconscious, but she damn well looked the part. A few little cat paws walked right over her back as she lay there on the ground– even when they were gone, she didn't move. Slamming her face into the tile had stopped her sneezing, but she couldn’t bring herself to be grateful. Especially not with Jax looming over her, laughing his ass off at her expense.
When Pomni lifted her head, she looked far less humored than he was. Her eyes were red and irritated, and as she sat up, she seriously considered finding something to throw at him. The cats were already coming back. Their ears pushed forward and their steps were cautious. Pomni scooted back from them like they were demons, rubbing furiously at the spot where her nose would be. She didn’t have nostrils in this digital body, but damn did it feel like she did…
“Control your army of death,” She hissed to Jax as the wave of cats only grew closer, “#$%!, it’s a cafe, isn’t it?! Find them some food!”
Her demand had Jax snorting and rolling his eyes. But he did turn around to go look for some food, a trail of tails in the air following after him. “Alright, alright. Can’t be mad at the cats or me, Pomni; I offered to go somewhere else, and it’s not their fault you’re allergic.”
Something in stainless steel caught his eye, then. He’d found more than just a storage compartment; the minute he pulled open the door, he stopped to see a rather convoluted-looking contraption, cat bowls lined at every faucet-shaped pipe. There was a button where he stood that he barely gave two seconds of thought before pressing. The second that the pipes began distributing kibble, every cat ever scrambled forward in chaotic meowing. Pomni had been spared.
“...Huh.” Jax said, before shrugging and moseying his way back towards the jester. “There. Happy now?”
:”Yes. Thank you.”
He took his seat beside her, and they watched the cats settle down to eat. A few hopped to and fro between the bowls, as if the kibble would somehow taste any better from a different pipe. It was nice. Pomni tilted her head back, letting it all sink in. As if it was proximity based, she no longer had the urge to sneeze.
“Didn’t know you were a cat person.” She commented softly, smiling to herself.
Jax shrugged a shoulder. “Yeah, me neither. Never really had much experience owning a pet in the real world.”
There was a bitterness there. Pomni turned her head towards Jax, watching his expression. He was staring at the floor now, one leg drawn up, ears tilted forward down over his head.
“Did you ever… want to have o-?”
“How come you didn’t tell me you had allergies?” Jax asked, completely cutting her off. And he wasn’t going to backtrack. She knew better. “Why would you subject yourself to this, willingly?”
The jester sighed, reaching over to pull a clump of cat fur off of her shoulder pad. “I’m kinda thinking this is what Caine wanted us to ‘stick out’. I’ve done it before pet sitting for my coworkers. So…” She grinned softly then, looking up to meet his eyes. “You also just seemed really excited about it. I didn’t want to skip an adventure you might actually like.” Sure enough, his eyes widened, and the second he opened his mouth, she was the one to cut him off. “And don’t try to play it off.”
Then the rabbit grinned, and turned away. Pomni knew well enough by now what it meant. “Yeah, well. Cats are cats. I’m just surprised Caine got them to act normally.” He turned his head back after a moment, regarding her with his usual mirthful, twinkling eyes. “Wait, are you saying you wanted to stay for lil’ ol’ me? How thoughtful of you, Pom-pom.”
“Yeah.” Pomni shot back quickly. She leaned against the wall, arms behind her head. “That’s what I’m saying. And I don’t regret it.”
She watched him. For one precious, obvious second, Jax froze up, his ears straightening out like they always did when she– or anything– took him by surprise.
Over at the dinner bowls, two cats had gotten into a dispute over the last few pieces of kibble. For all its sudden violence, it was resolved quickly. The same gray cat moved on with a vengeful growl. It sniffed a few of the other empty bowls and headed right back over towards Jax. As it crawled into his lap, its tail drifted dangerously close to Pomni’s face.
She once again winced. “But I might.”
Out of the corner of her eye, Pomni watched Jax. He lifted his arm and began to pet the little cat, and it seemed almost subconscious with the way he stared off as he did so. Others had settled themselves around him. A siamese ran its tail along Pomni’s arm, and despite knowing it would damn her, she reached out for a pet. The cafe fell silent. Everything else became second thoughts for a little bit.
“We could actually leave, you know.” Jax’s murmur broke the silence. He hadn’t looked at her when he’d said it. In his lap, the gray cat blinked up at him, as if it understood. “This was supposed to be fun for both of us.”
Pomni watched as the siamese stood up, turning around to headbutt her hand. She couldn’t stop smiling at it, even as she waited in dread for her next sneezing fit. “It is fun.” She answered him softly. “Trust me, if this were real life, I wouldn’t even be able to talk. Just… take your time. Enjoy it. And when you’ve had enough, we can leave.”
She expected him to argue back. No matter how many times she’d tried to lay down conditions in the past, Jax had blown her off with a remark of some sort, and gone off to do his own thing. She was used to it. She expected it. And so when he didn’t reply, didn’t snag the opportunity to butt heads with her… it shocked her.
She watched him pet and murmur softly to the gray cat. And something in her felt like it changed, if only for a moment. This time, it was Pomni who felt the urge to turn away.
She didn’t dare.
Cat after cat came to see them, and through all her sneezing fits, Pomni petted each one brave enough to stick around. It was hard, it was miserable, and yet as they purred and rubbed against her, she couldn’t ignore how adorably sweet they were. Many happy, purring cats, making it very hard to choose to leave.
Jax was in much the same boat. He could hardly comprehend it as he watched the cats choose to crawl all over him. Weren’t they supposed to be picky about who they let touch them? What had he done to deserve their attention? Did Caine put that into their programming?? …Not that he was complaining; in fact, it was strangely relaxing to have so many warm, rumbling bodies against him. One bold soul crawled right up his chest, trying to lay halfway up on his shoulder blade.
Jax turned his head to try to get Pomni’s “help”. He would have complained for the bit, acted like he was being smothered under all this fluff. But when he saw how Pomni looked, her eyes slipped closed in peace, literally everything he could have said went straight out the window.
“Wow.”
And god dammit, of course she would open her eyes. She met his own, and at first she stared curiously into his blown out pupils. Then the pinwheels in her eyes travelled down to the pile of cats he’d amassed across his body. The same humored smirk found its way back on her face.
“Sit there much longer, you’ll be more cat than bunny.” She chimed. With perfect timing, yet another cat joined the pile, plopping its chunky body carelessly on top of its friends. They yowled in dismay, wriggling their way out from under it. The gray cat stood up on its hind legs and sniffed at Jax’s face. Then it leaned forward and touched its nose to where his own would be. The tip of its muzzle was cold and wet.
And then Jax pushed off of the wall with such speed that the cats tumbled off of him. They scattered a few feet away, and Pomni frowned, reaching after them almost on an instinct. “Wait-”
“Guess it’s a good thing time’s up, then,” Jax grinned. He raised an arm above his head and stretched it out, ignoring the gray cat meowing at his feet. “I’m hungry. And bored. Let’s work on getting outta here instead.”
Pomni stared. He wasn’t looking at her again, wasn’t waiting for her as he turned and waltzed right for the door. The jester had no choice but to get up and follow him. And the gray cat– bless its little heart– stopped following after a certain point, staring up at Jax in confusion. The saddest little mew left its mouth and Pomni could never understand how that alone didn’t make him turn back around.
He swung open the door, and she followed him out.
“I wonder if that was it.” She spoke once they got outside. Jax was back to being silent, his very posture different as he walked. Her “nose” still burned and she could feel a sneeze stuck. It was a constant tickle underneath her skin. “If that wasn’t what we needed to stick out, I’m throwing something at Caine.”
She wobbled on her feet, eyes all puffy. And for whatever reason, Jax turned back to look at her. The second he saw her condition, he changed course, stepping back over to her with a critical eye.
“You sure you’re gonna be able to make it back? You don’t look very good, toots…”
She didn't feel very good. Yet the jester still straightens her posture out, nodding firmly. “It's just allergies.” She prepared to take another step-
Badabum!
A jingle from her left made Pomni whirl her head in that direction. She quirked her eyebrow, instantly dumbfounded. A few feet away stood a light blue photo booth that definitely wasn't there before. PHOTOS was painted on its side in bright white. A purple curtain pulled itself out of the way. The whole thing looked like it belonged at the end of a theme park.
Jax's eyes had gone big and wide. He stood unmoving, his ears sticking straight up, as he stared at the booth like it would come alive. He had seen this before. His mind flashed briefly to the polaroids on his wall and he just as quickly shook his head. It wasn't a second too soon. Pomni turned to look at him just as he returned to grinning, trying to ignore the way his heart pounded in his ears.
They shared a look, and began to walk closer. Pomni reached the curtain first, and as she dipped into the booth to check it out, she suddenly giggled.
“Oh. Aww!” She pulled back then with three polaroids in hand, their blank backs facing Jax. “They were already taken. Look.”
Jax had tried to show her his palms, to reject them, but Pomni flipped them over in a flash and he had no choice but to look. The first two were of the cat cuddle pile in his lap, but the third was of everything. Pomni with her eyes closed, Jax petting on the cats clamoring for his attention. It looked so… peaceful. She looked so peaceful. His pupils dilated and he almost damn reached out for the thing.
All his focus made Pomni turn the polaroid around, trying to see what he was looking at. “Ah.” She murmured with a grin, and to his dismay, drew her arm back. “Yeah, I wasn't really photogenic in there-”
“No!!”
Pomni paused, her eyes wide as saucers. Jax had held out his palm the second he cried out, and now he was frozen like a deer in the headlights. His ears stuck straight up like exclamation points.
He was screwed.
The jester’s shock slowly melded into humored confusion. She smiled, albeit nervously– “Ooookay”– and passed the polaroid along. Instead of rejecting it as he likely should have, Jax took the blasted thing, staring down at it. At her.
Oh, he was so screwed.
“I'm not keeping it.” He murmured, and whisked the polaroid into his overall pocket, just like that. He met Pomni's eyes, and the way her face fell in confusion made him regret everything for a moment. Just for a little. “I'm just making sure it's all safe n’ sound for you, or whatever.”
Pomni shook her head, expression clearing. “Ah, g-gotcha. Thanks.” She set the rest of the photos into Hammerspace, and just as she did so did a portal open up behind them. They’d found their reward. It was time to leave. Pomni went to take a step– and promptly fell right on the ground.
She blinked down at the brick path under her palms. “Uh… geez.”
It wasn’t hard to stand back up, but she was all wobbly and weak all of a sudden. It didn’t even feel like allergies anymore. She felt like she’d been pile driven by the flu. “The %#@/ is…?”
Jax’s shadow loomed over her. “You know, you can be real bull-headed when ya wanna be.” Then, without waiting for her to respond, he took her by the shoulders and lifted her up off the floor with surprising ease. For a moment, she tensed. She hated being touched at the best of times, especially like this, all sudden and when she was already a bit vulnerable. And he settles her against his chest, and she has a lot to say about that. Only nothing comes out. Nothing except a squeak.
Jax peered down at her, mischief twinkling in his eye. “Comfy?”
Her own narrowed skeptically. “You just wanted the opportunity.” is what she could come up with. What did it mean? …Who knew? “So, what. You gonna drop me if the others see you being nice?”
He began walking as if nothing about this was weird, as if he’d ever done this before in his entire life. “You know how to tempt me with a good time, don’t you?” If he noticed the way that sounded, he gave no indication. Pomni, on the other hand, certainly did.
“...Wait, do you mean dropping me, or-”
“Sides, did ya wanna fall over again? Cuz, I mean, it’s definitely a highlight for me. But it’d also take forever, and I’m gonna be honest, I don’t know if I have that kinda patience.”
He stepped through the portal in one smooth motion, the space around them humming and warping in color. Within seconds, the familiar eyebleeds of the Circus lobby had surrounded them. Pomni instantly ducked her head away from it all– the bright light, the garish color. Everything. It hurt.
“And anyway, you can’t hide it from me. I know you secretly like this.”
She tried to dig her nonexistent nails into his shoulder. Then she pressed her palms to them, pushing back; at the very least, she wouldn’t be cradled like a child. That was the worst part of this, actually. Pomni looked behind her to scan the lobby, brows furrowed. It was empty. Had everyone else already gotten back and moved along, or were they the first to finish their side of the adventure?
“...Whatever. Where the $#@& is Caine?” The jester growled. God, she sounded so much like Jax right now. “I’m tired of feeling like this.”
“Beats me,” Jax was walking again. “Not that I mind. You ain’t all that heavy. I could carry you ‘round all day if you’d let me.”
“You didn’t even ask me to begin with.” It was hard enough to fire that back at him. Her head felt full of fuzz, and the more time passed without Caine appearing, the more antsy she began to get. Wasn’t he supposed to show up and whisk away the aftermath of their adventure?? He’d done it so many times.
…Was this even part of the adventure? Was it possible for it not to be??
Pomni pressed her head forward to hide from the lights again. They were too damn bright. A pounding headache formed behind her eyes as the beams sunk through her irises. She didn’t even know this could happen here.
“Just… take me to my room.” She murmured, weak. “Seriously.”
And Jax’s voice, almost for her sake, was softer when he replied. “Fine.”
Getting her door open was only slightly difficult for Jax; he found it surprisingly easy to maneuver her into one arm and he tried really hard not to think about that. He was aware, at any point in all of this, that he could have just done the “funny” thing: dropped her unceremoniously onto the couch of the main lobby for the others to deal with. Or left her at the portal to start. Yet, there was no urge to do any of that. Even when he approached her bed, he made damn sure to lower her carefully. She sank into the blankets with a whine.
Her room was cold. It had never felt that way before, had never felt warm either. It was a digital space. But the very air was chilly and the second she’d been placed into bed, Pomni was dragging the blankets over herself, face creased into something somewhere between exhaustion and pain. “#@$/, what is this…” She hissed flatly. “Caine…”
The jester reclused further into her lump of blankets, the tails of her hat vanishing from Jax’s sight. She had no idea if he was still there, but she hadn’t heard the door shut, so… “Ngh. Go away.” She groaned, just in case he wasn’t gone. It came out rude, and she knew that. But… she just wanted to be alone. She’d nursed herself back to health countless times in the real world. Surely it’d be the same here.
Jax had been standing awkwardly once he’d set her down. He didn’t expect her to practically disappear under the sheets, or even want him to actually leave. The way she said that had something twisting uncomfortably in him, if only for a minute. He frowned.
He’d never been good at listening. Jax moved forward, plopping himself on the edge of her bed.
“And leave you like this?” His voice was soft again. And that alone kept Pomni’s temper down; she blinked under her blanket, sighing under her breath. “I’m cruel, but I’m not a monster. Someone’s gotta keep an eye on you.”
Pomni moved the blanket back down a bit, just enough to show her eyes. Her teeth were chattering suddenly, little form shaking beneath the heavy duvet. “Why don’t you get someone else to do it, then? Zooble or Ragatha or… just…”
Jax leaned forward. His grin– not that he’d had one on for the past few minutes– was gone, brows pinched as he stared at her chattering teeth. When had she gotten so cold?? When had she started shaking? But his posture tensed up and his pupils shrank when he heard those names. Something cold and ugly twisted in his chest, and he actually scoffed with it. He skipped right over the fact Pomni had mentioned Zooble first.
“Oh, please. Ragatha? She wouldn’t know what to do for herself, much less someone else. In fact”– he scooted closer, reaching out for her shoulder– “She’d probably end up calling me right back in here.”
He placed a hand on the puffy shoulder of her jester outfit. Even through his glove, even through her suit, he could feel it. She was cold to the touch, and that alone made his voice change. His face only shifted further into concern– concern he had never shown anyone, ever.
“...You’re freezing, Pom.”
Pomni shifted, pulling her shoulder out from under his touch. She straightened out under the blankets, blinking bleary eyes out into the surrounding darkness. “I don’t… know why this is happening.” She murmured. And it sounded so small and scared that for a moment, she doubted it was even her own voice. “Isn’t Caine supposed to fix this? What am I gonna do if he doesn’t…?”
It hurt. Her head, her body… how could she feel pain this specific? How could she have gotten sick, legitimately sick, immediately after having an allergy attack?
Jax stared down at her. His heart felt like it was on the floor and he hated it as much as he hated seeing this. Seeing her like this. It was starting to worry him, too. But he couldn’t let her start panicking. “Hey. Pomni.”
Pomni stopped halfway to reaching to pull at her hat. She found his eyes in the dark, brows pinched in worry and pain. “...W-What?”
His brows furrowed as he stared down at her. It was probably the most serious he’d ever been, the most he’d ever allowed anyone to see. He hated it when people got like this.
“What did I tell you about overthinking things?” Surprisingly, in complete contrast to the intense stare he was giving her, his voice was gentler than it had been this whole time. “Lighten up, Pom. Yeah, it sucks, but it’s not gonna be permanent. Nothing here is permanent. That’s the entire thing.” He backed up just a bit. “We just gotta wait it out until tomorrow, when Caine can fix it. That’s all. You can do that alone, if ya want. I’m not forcing anything. But I also think maybe having a distraction could help, too. So.”
Here was where he lost some of that momentum. He looked away for a brief second, shrugging a shoulder. “Like I said, though. Choice is yours.”
Pomni simply stared. The options had frozen her mind for a moment, and though she tried to make sense of them inwardly, it was hardly working. She… no shit, she’d already almost started spiraling with him here. If she kicked him out, would that happen again? Or would it be even worse?
But even still, she’d never been in this situation before. She’d been sick, obviously. But to have the luxury to choose to have someone be with her? Even if that someone was Jax, she… she was finding it hard to turn away from that. He didn’t seem like he’d make a great nurse. But Pomni didn’t need a nurse. She needed to make it to tomorrow without losing her mind.
And though he made her feel like she was on the verge of doing so almost every day… although he took nothing seriously, never knew when to shut his mouth, and avoided sincerity like the plague, she couldn’t exactly open her mouth and tell him to leave. And so the decision was made.
“...You can stay.” She murmured, sinking down into a puffy, silk-sheltered pillow. It was the only choice that seemed sane right now, even as half of her mind screamed out in pure dismay. “You’re right. I’d be better off with distractions. I’ve just…”
Never had anyone there to take care of me.
“...never been a fan of getting sick.” She finished, giving a wry grin. “W-Who is?”
Jax’s face reverted, morphing back into something more familiar. He kicked back against the headboard, arms behind his head. “I’m sure it’s someone’s kink somewhere,” He replied completely unashamed, only to wave it off with a hand. “And anyway, distractions are what I’m good at, so I’m the best ya got.”
Pomni had balked at what he’d first said, and before she could stop it, she gave a comical scream, lugging a throw pillow at his head. “Thanks, Jax. Now I’m gonna be thinking about that this whole time.” She scrubbed her eyes, as if she could clear out the memory of what she’d heard. He was good at distractions. But at what cost?
Pomni scooted back down to where most of her was under the blankets again. Her body was still shivering, and she still had a headache, but she tried to stay focused on powering through it. That was going to be the key for this.
“...I’m still really $@%/ing cold.”
She was bundled up in all of her covers, still dressed. How could she be cold in all of that? This “allergy” thing was intense…
One solution presented itself to Jax, then. One that made his face warm, and his heart ram head first into a wall. Before he knew what he was saying, he found himself blurting it out. “I could help with that.”
For all her weakness and slow processing at that moment, it didn't take long for her to parse what he was getting at. It showed on her face for one precious moment– her eyes widened, pupils flicking about, before she shrank deeper into the blankets, pulling them around her neck.
"...Can you?" It wasn't a challenge. It wasn't meant rudely. She looked at the lump of covers she'd pulled up over herself.If that wasn't enough, then... maybe warmth just couldn't touch her. Still... something about the prospect alone had her face heating up in a way that was downright humiliating. When did she get so easy?
When did he get so stupid? Why would he say something like that?? It was so obvious. There was no way he wasn't going to get kicked out. There was no way she wasn't about to-
"You can, um. You can try.”
"...Ha. ‘Try.’ Right." To play off his own near-panic, Jax rolled his eyes. "Watch this."
Using every ounce of courage he had left, he rolled himself onto the bed to settle behind her, hesitating for only a moment with his arm hovering over her, before he officially settled into her backside. His chin sank onto the top of her head almost too easily.
They were spooning. There was no way around that, no more innocuous way to put it. Pomni could feel his heartbeat against the small of her back. It was racing like a thundering horse, even as he tried to croak out something sly.
“Better?”
…Uh oh.
She wasn't sure what she'd been expecting to happen. Obviously, it was going to be physical. Duh. But this was... this was...
…warm. He was warm, producing actual heat, and she didn't even bother to question it. Everything else became secondary as she pushed back against him, feeling his heart beat impossibly faster. This was fine. This would be good.
Pomni was no less graceful in her answer. “B-Better.”
Even with her confirmation, Jax kept expecting to be pushed away. Any second now, Pomni would snap out of the haze of illness, realize what was happening, and kick him out right on his ass.
Even so, completely on its own, his tail wagged. His face burned. He didn't dare close his eyes, masking his own nerves with a snort at the way her voice sounded.
"Don't make this weirder than it already is, weirdo." His tease fell entirely flat, even in his own ears. "I'm just helping you out. Which, by the way, you're welcome."
Unfortunately, it didn't work like he'd hoped. Pomni snorted back, dry and sarcastic. “Yeah, because I totally told you to do that.”
It was good he couldn't see her face from here. Or feel her heart. Maybe. Hopefully. She could feel his, though, and that persistent fact had a smirk tugging at her lips, flustered as she was. Why was he even trying to hide it? It was so obvious…
Then an idea hit. She didn't have to let him. If there was any of his behaviors she could put a spotlight on, she would damn love it to be this one.
Pomni turned around to face Jax faster than he could process it. Faster than he could even dare to make his expression match the pretense he was trying to establish. She got to see it all. His face was red, his ears drooped backwards in a show she had never seen. And as he stared into her eyes in nothing but pure horror, they both knew he'd been caught.
With a smirk, Pomni rested her case. "You really do just want the opportunity.”
For an uncomfortable amount of time, all Jax did was stare. His eyes were blown out and his face only darkened, parts of his fur sticking up with her attention alone. He was stiff– not from discomfort, but from the knowledge that if he let himself relax, he'd bring her closer. And he was more than just doomed after that.
"...Uh," He found himself saying dumbly, blinking once. Before the absurdity of it crashed into him, and he turned his burning face away from hers entirely in embarrassment. "Yeah, right. Keep tellin' yourself that."
It was the lamest thing he'd ever done.
Usually, Pomni would simply roll her eyes at the way he tried to backtrack. It was a Jax staple, after all. But right then, even watching him so clearly try to deflect just had her wanting to slap him. She admired the dedication in an ironic way. But it gets to a point… and so, Pomni scooted closer to him, her chin right beneath his.
"You know, you can just tell me."
Jax swallowed hard. His pupils flitted back and forth, like a trapped animal… which he was. “…Tell you what?”
And Pomni showed no mercy.
"You should tell me why you wanted to stay here so much. Why you got mad when I mentioned Ragatha. Why you chose to spoon me to warm me up” – She smirked wide at that bit – “instead of a terse hug until I was just better enough.”
Her multicolored eyes swept over his face, and she just kept going. He kept giving her more, and more, and more. "Why you're turning red, why you can't look at me, why you still haven't let me go despite trying to play it cool… I could go on..."
She wrapped her arms around his shoulders as if she were going in for something more. Much more. If Jax had a rabbit nose, she was sure it'd be twitching.
"So you should spit it out. I wanna hear you say it.”
At this point, half of Jax was terrified that this was just a ploy to get him to open up, to talk, to get closer. And despite everything that he'd ever been through, he somehow, somehow, fell for it. Every single one of his walls struggled to remain standing. His mind willed him to push her away. He was used to kicking and screaming, but she trapped him there. Not just with her words, not just with her eyes.
But one glimpse at her face and he just about died. His own arm flexed reflexively around her and his face twisted into a grimace. He knew exactly what she was talking about. But it felt like Hell to even want it.
If he could, he would have covered his face with a hand. He kept his gaze away from her. He had to. Once they locked eyes, he'd sentence them both.
Almost desperately, he shook his head, and finally responded. "Y'don't want that.”
Her hands moved. They lifted and came to rest on the fronts of his shoulders. He felt her breath ghost his chin. She was trying to get in his line of sight, and as much as he wanted to, he couldn't bring himself to look.
"Hey." She murmured softly, comfortingly. Like talking to some scared feral animal. "It's alright. I do."
He shook his head mutely. Talking was only getting harder, and he hated it.
"You can say it, Jax. Nothing bad is gonna happen.”
Jax flinched like he’d been struck. Nothing bad would happen– how did she know? How could she possibly know that? Didn't she remember anymore who she was talking to?
And yet... his hand, reluctantly, moved up to ever-so-carefully tuck a stray strand of hair back in place, with the most gentle touch he's ever given anyone. Even if it felt like taboo, even if it felt like he was crawling through the pits of Hell, damning himself… he obliged. He wanted to touch her. No matter the risks.
"...Maybe not to me," He murmured with all the shame in the world, pulling his hand and gaze away. "But it could to you. I'm not... I'm not someone you should want." He closed his eyes for a brief moment in cowardice, fighting the urge to pull away. "You know what I do. I shouldn't act like I have a chance with…" The way he sunk into the pillows was telling enough. He was hiding from her, from her love, her encouragement. "I don't deserve you.”
In his own way, he was trying to protect her. Pomni had seen firsthand just what she’d be signing up for. He had gone out of his way to show her, to be as brash and rude and undesirable as possible… and it wasn’t enough. Because he wanted her. He wanted her, but if she loved him in return…
No. It couldn’t happen this way.
Even still, Pomni moved her hands down his shoulders. Her gaze was pensive yet firm, and he stared into her eyes whilst she wasn’t looking at him. The red and blue looked so much more alive in the dark of her room.
“I…I won’t say nothing bad could happen.” The jester spoke at last. Her voice was soft and grounded. “But I don’t think that anything… will. Not on purpose.”
Had she forgotten already? Their argument after the battle royale… he had pushed her away, deliberately, after telling her that he would move on if she abstracted. Why had she come back after that? What did she mean, not on purpose? He’d meant every word, that was the problem.
Her hand found his own in the dark, and for a precious second, Jax stopped thinking. Every concern fell away and if he had the guts to look at her right now, he knew he would see her smile. Innocent, pure. Unknowing. Accepting.
She had her palm on his, not grasping, not forcing.
“...I trust you, Jax.”
It was those last four words that had his eyes snapping open to stare directly at her. To find her staring at him like he was the only thing worth paying attention to. The stars in those pinwheel eyes shimmered in the dark and it made his heart do some other terrible motion. No one had ever looked at him like that before.
He couldn’t look away anymore. His eyes searched hers as he slowly folded his fingers over her hand. She was so small. Everything about her was so small.
“...You shouldn’t.” He murmured, just barely over a whisper. He shifted a bit closer to her then, and squeezed her hand close to his chest. At long last, his heart was starting to calm down. “But… I’m… I’m glad you do.”
And Pomni sighed, in what sounded like relief. She sank into his warmth, his long arms snaking round her in a way that only felt right.
"I think I will throw something at Caine tomorrow." She decided, voice heavy with exhaustion. "I just..."– A yawn –"don't know what."
Jax smirked. His eyes had slipped closed somewhere along the way, and his chin came to rest atop her head, her stupid ginormous jester hat be damned. “I’ve got a few suggestions for when you’re feelin’ better.” He replied. “One of them will probably be Zooble’s head.”
Pomni snorted. “I was going to ask them for a spare part. So I’ll get back to you on that one.”
She could feel his chest rumbling, and she was just a bit too tired to try and question why he was able to purr. It made no sense, but that didn’t matter. It was lulling her into sleep. All her ailments were becoming second thoughts.
“Goodnight, Jax.”
Unbeknownst to her, his tail would wag. His heart felt full and he had to sigh to release some of the fuzzy feeling coursing through him. It was a pleasant, happy sound. “...Yeah. G’night, Pom.”
A few seconds later was when she spoke again. "...Jax?"
"Mmh?"
"You know what I just realized?"
"Mm."
"We didn't even try any of the food back there."
And Jax's eyes popped back open as if the whole room were on fire. "$#@&!"