Chapter Text
1990
Akari sat on her bed, trying her best to smooth out the blanket, struggling to find satisfaction. Her purple hair was left hanging loose, as she was preparing for sleep. Usually, she kept it tied in a ponytail. Her roommate (who she barely knew) was going out and was at someplace she couldn't bother to find out about. Her glasses sat before the dorm's telephone, both reflecting back some of the room's dim light. A little before midnight, that telephone rings and Akari reaches for it to answer.
"Hello Akari! How is your work going? You've been there for a month now, right?"
"Ah, hello mom. It's not much different from last year. As usual, there's plenty of reading I need to get done. And yes, it has been a month since I left home for my second year. I believe that is everything you asked me."
"Good, good. And what about you? How are you doing?"
"Me? I suppose I'm fine. It's not like anything is really happening to me. Just classes."
"You remember what your father and I told you, right?"
"What did you tell me? You two say a lot to me."
"Akari! We've been saying this for years! You're 19, almost 20, and have heard us tell you this since you were a young child!"
"Oh, that. Yes, I'll make sure to... You know. It's a long list and I promise I remember it all. I've had years of practice."
"Akari..."
"Yes, mom?"
"Nothing. I'm just... I'm just worried. You're really just okay living like that? You know you can't stay that way forever."
"Living like what? Alone? It's not like it's my fault! Besides, I'm used to this. Things have always been this way. Yes, I know I'll need to talk for work and stuff, but I have no issue with that. I don't get what's your problem with me. I'm trying! I really am!"
The silence after that was long and tense, but Akari felt cleaner than she has been in years. Somehow, she was able to cross that line today and say what she really felt.
Her mother, who anyways seemed so dauntless in conversation, didn't know how to end this call. However, the empty space kept growing larger without words to fill it.
"Goodbye Akari," she finally managed to stammer.
Akari didn't even want to respond. The dial tone hummed for a while, but she then put the phone back in it's holder. She tried to keep herself from looking at it. Then, she just sat there, staring at the wall. Maybe this is all her fault. Everyone else is able to manage their relationships and have friends. She should be well aware already, everyone always hints this to her: there is something very wrong with her and she's not enough.
Akari thought about all the times she messed up, said the wrong thing or said the thing wrong. She recalled one of her earliest childhood memories.
"Hi there!" A kid around her age approached her as she stared at a tree trunk.
"Oh. Um, hello."
"I'm going to go to the grass over there and play with my ball."
"Okay. Thanks for letting me know."
"You didn't even look at it! It's a really nice ball, very shiny and red!"
"I'm watching ants. Here, I'll move so you can see too. Look at them crawl down that tree! And some of them are carrying food on their backs. Their nest has to be somewhere nearby..."
"Ew! That's so gross! I hate ants and all kinds of bugs!"
"Oh, well I like them a lot. I'm going tell you about how they're able to stick to surfaces when they crawl. They-- Oh. She's gone. And she didn't say goodbye. Mom and dad are always telling me I have to say goodbye, though I forget sometimes. I guess she forgot too."
Things like this happened more times than she could keep track of.
It has been a week since the phone call. Both her parents haven't called back since then. The sun spills in from the many large library windows. Akari found shade by sitting beneath a bookshelf. She was reading an entomology book but had a few frogs related texts around her. The entomology was for review and the frogs were for pleasure.
As she takes notes on the section, a boy approaches her. She got interrupted, causing her to get irrationally angry.
"Um... Excuse me. Hi. Do you think you could help me find (NAME OF BOOK GOES HERE). I need it for one of my classes..."
Akari tried to calm herself and regain focus. His sentence kept replaying in her head, worsening her irritation. After a few breaths, she realized she shouldn't ignore him.
"I've seen that title before. I assume you're studying engineering. We're currently in the first aisle. You'll have to look five aisles behind this one, so in the sixth aisle. It should be somewhere in the middle of that shelf. I'll come with you and help you look for it."
She looked up from the ground and scanned her disturber. He looked like he was probably around a year younger than her, so this was likely one of his first months at university. He had messy teal hair and wore glasses. His pair seemed to be a bit thinner than hers, meaning that he had better eyes. Beneath the lenses, he had thin golden yellow eyes. He had a strange expression on his face, like he was trying to force a pleasant smile.
"Ah, I forgot to say this. My name is Keiji Kamishiro."
"I'm Akari Takahashi. Nice to meet you, Kamishiro."
"Likewise. Thanks by the way."
"You're welcome. So, why did you choose to ask for my help?"
"Well, to be honest, you were the first person I saw. I was really struggling and I... Ah, this is so embarrassing! It's just so overwhelming since this place is huge! I was really desperate and didn't know where to go. Then, I saw you. So, thank you. You really saved me."
Somehow, Akari couldn't stay angry with him. He reminded her of herself in a way. She could relate to being scared and confused. And she definitely knows how it feels to be overwhelmed and desperate.
"Here it is." Akari points at a spine and Keiji reaches for it.
"I'll be heading back to my spot now. If you're planning to read now, you're welcome to stay by me if you're quiet."
"Thank you, Takahashi. For both the help and the offer. Ah, I guess I already thanked you for the help. Yes, I will join you and I promise not to interrupt. Oh, and I'm sorry for earlier. I get annoyed when people interrupt me when I'm focused. I'm not sure if you're the same. I was really desperate, please forgive me!"
Akari turned to look at Keiji, trying not to laugh as they walked back to their spot on the floor.