Work Text:
Another quiet evening in Gardenview.
The room was filled with the light of the setting sun shining through the window. The light revealed dust particles flying through the air.
You'd been sitting in your dear friend's room for several hours now. The day had been surprisingly unburdened by the many worries generously bestowed upon you by the head of the entire center.
You could vaguely make out what your beloved friend was saying; your steady breathing and heavily pounding heart were more indistinct to you. A fool in love.
Shelly had no idea what thoughts filled your head, and let's be honest, she probably hadn't given it much thought. You were always with her, didn't avoid her, and unlike everyone else, you were willing to listen to her, and you did so with pleasure. She's starting to suspect you're upset about something; she's noticed your seemingly hypnotized gaze, but she's so afraid of scaring you off if she pries into your soul. If it were anyone else, she would have asked without hesitation, but you're different, you're special, and losing you would be incredibly painful.
And then again, she notices a slight change in your face. Shelly no longer wants to wait and wonder how this will all turn out.
- "Hey... are you okay? Did I upset you somehow...? Just tell me if anything happens, and I'll do everything right and... and...!"
She began to stutter as soon as she saw the surprised and upset expression on your face. Shelly's eyes immediately turned sad, her mouth began to tremble slightly, opening and closing in an attempt to speak.
You realized you'd screwed up somewhere, badly.
Your heart began to beat pitifully like a bird in a cage, and your hands craved the chance to reach out to Shelly and envelop her in your embrace, hiding her from the cruel world around her. But oh God, you can't do that now, you have to be patient. You've been planning this for too long to be swayed by unforeseen circumstances and say everything right now.
Your hands settled on Shelly's shoulders and you leaned slightly closer to her face. Shelly looked at you with her large, caramel-colored eyes, glistening with tears under their lashes.
What is she doing to you...
You swallowed and decided you had to stop thinking about yourself right now and comfort the poor girl who was practically crying because of you.
- Shells, darling, did I offend you somehow...?
Slight disappointment and a great deal of regret were audible in your voice. Your arms held Shelly tightly but didn't cause her discomfort, your thumbs lightly stroking her shoulders in a soothing gesture. Words can't describe the torture you would have subjected yourself to at that moment. You didn't mean to, but you were the cause of her tears, so you simply had to make it right.
Shelly collected her thoughts. Usually, she spoke on the fly, without much thought, immediately saying whatever came to mind, but this wasn't typical; she needed to think. Her mouth stopped trembling and closed for a few seconds before opening again and speaking:
- "You... you're just acting a little strange. I've noticed it recently, even though you've been doing it for a while now, but it's as if you're looking right through me, like you're sitting next to me and looking right at me, but as if you're not even in the same room with me... and I... I thought I was boring you. And you've been refusing my hugs for the last week. Explain, what's wrong...?”
And here's the answer to exactly where you screwed up. Well done, you were so oblivious that you didn't even consider that Shelly wouldn't notice how you've been avoiding physical contact with her like a damn coward, afraid your plan, which you've been working on for the last week, will go down the drain.
Bravo, round of applause, and a Darwin Award. You deserve it.
You sighed and lowered your head slightly, collecting your thoughts, your forehead touching hers in a rather warm and intimate gesture. Even Shelly, unsuspecting, was slightly embarrassed by this and looked away, but her head didn't move, leaving you in this interesting position.
You glanced toward the window without breaking the much-desired physical contact with Shelly. The setting sun was perfectly positioned. We could slightly change the plan. You wanted everything to be perfect and, let's be honest, you dragged it out until the last minute, but at the moment you couldn't find a single reason to put off your plan for the future until a better moment.
You returned your gaze to Shelly, who had suddenly gone silent. Her expression wasn't sad anymore, but rather interested.
You gathered your courage and decided to break the awkward silence that had descended between you. Come what may. You spoke quickly, stashing parts of your sentence together, and only by luck did it remain incoherent:
- Shells, will you come with me?
Shelly blinked rapidly. Her eyes widened in surprise at the question, so odd in this situation.
You continued your sentence, more calmly:
- I promise you'll understand everything if you come with me to the terrace now. The only thing I'll tell you here is that you're absolutely not bothering me, and don't you dare ever again entertain the thought that you might bother me, okay?
Shelly was unable to tell you anything, but you waited patiently for her answer.
Your heart was pounding. Every second of waiting in silence felt like an eternity. You prayed to every possible god for her answer.
And this miracle sat there, looking at you with her large, beautiful eyes. You watched her every tiny movement, the almost imperceptible wrinkle between her brows as she scrutinized you, her slightly pressed lips, the gentle movement of her fingers. You burned under her searching gaze, and at the same time, you suffered and enjoyed it.
Your desperate torment while waiting for an answer was interrupted by her sweet voice, which had become calmer in contrast to the earlier admiring one when she told you about the individual characteristics of different dinosaurs:
- “Are you talking about your terrace?”
A simple nod from you was her answer.
The only thing you allowed yourself in your time was to ask Dandy for your own terrace where you could sit by yourself. You didn't like loud events, you didn't like large groups, and you didn't like being a daily witness to Gardenview and all its members looking miserable. You needed a place where you could forget about everything bad, escape your worries, and allow yourself to dream. This terrace has become your secluded corner with a view of the mesmerizing sunset and open to the warm breeze. This time, your plan could lead to the loss of both the person most dear to you and your only sanctuary.
The sun continued to set while you and Shelly walked higher, to the upper floors. All the while, you held Shelly's hand and led her to the place you'd already prepared.
You finally arrived. The sun, in a soft sunset light, illuminated the terrace. The terrace railing seemed to glow, decorated with tiny lights. The air was filled with the strong scent of wisteria, which was only natural, considering the railing was lined with it. No one could imagine how much you toiled over that wisteria, or how painstakingly you decorated the railing with lights.
On the terrace itself, a blanket was neatly laid out. If it weren't for the candles you'd placed on the edges of the blanket earlier, it probably wouldn't have looked so neat. In the center of it all was a beautifully decorated jar.
Before you could gather your courage, Shelly stepped out onto the magically aura-filled terrace. The sadness completely vanished from her eyes at the sight before her. You followed her, closing the door behind you. You walked past, picking up the matches you'd left on the coffee table and began lighting all the candles. Shelly watched your every move intently, the candlelight reflecting in her eyes, adding even more sparkle and charm.
There is nowhere left to run, you have to do it, now or never.
The remaining box of matches went into your pocket, freeing your hands. You slowly took a step toward Shelly and offered her your hand. She hesitantly placed her hand in yours, and you gently pulled her toward the spread-out blanket. Without letting go of her hand, you sat down on the blanket and invited her to follow your example. Shelly sat down next to you.
Before she could ask anything, you picked up that very jar, decorated with an orange atlas ribbon and covered with a beautiful sunny picture. For a few seconds, she stared at the thing offered to her, doubting the reality of what was happening. And despite all her doubts, her hands reached for the gift. The hand that had previously been in yours slipped from yours effortlessly. You watched as her slightly trembling hands pulled the atlas ribbon and then opened the lid of the jar that you had been working on literally all week.
A piece of colored paper appeared before her eyes, and on it was written:
"All the little things that made me fall in love with you.”
She stared at you in disbelief. The realization of the situation and what exactly you were doing dawned on her. Her face took on a pinkish tint. The short message she'd read earlier was carefully set aside, giving way to the gold and orange paper stars that filled the jar.
You continued to watch her reaction, the trembling of her hands, the sparkle in her eyes with each word she read, the thin film of tears threatening to fall from her eyes in the form of teardrops. You wrote down every memory you shared imprinted in your mind, every little detail you noticed and adored about her. You wrote everything out in beautiful, neat letters, folding the paper stars from the messages you'd written:
"I find it so endearing how you slightly poke out the tip of your tongue when you're deeply focused on your research."
"Your laughter is like the ringing of bells."
"The warmth of your presence is comparable to the warmth of the sun."
"The scarf you gave me has become my favorite piece of clothing."
"Your smile is the reason I wake up every day."
You remembered everything you had been through together, every bright memory thanks to her.
There you were, sitting in the kitchen, filled with the smell of baked goods that Shelly and you had baked together, using a recipe she'd learned from the others. She'd gotten herself covered in flour, including you. Her infectious laughter echoed in your head, making you smile.
That homely scene has been replaced by your tidy room, usually quiet and orderly, but where Shelly is, there's no tense silence, only her ringing, bell-like voice. She gave you a scarf she made herself back then. You wear it faithfully almost every day.
Your adventure, filled with warm memories of your own, was interrupted by Shelly's sudden embrace. All the stars had already been taken, meaning everything had been read. You felt her rapid heartbeat next to yours. Without a second thought, you hugged her back, squeezing her tightly in your arms. How unusual it was for you to hear her usually loud and joyful voice so quietly and close.
Questions were unnecessary in this situation. You pulled away from Shelly, which at first startled her, as she thought you were put off by her questions, but she fell silent as soon as you gently took her hands and brought them to your lips.
You didn't have the words to express your feelings for her, but you could try to show them until the right words came to your mind.
You removed her gloves and tenderly kissed each finger in turn. Slowly and reverently, you didn't dare lift your eyes from her hands until you'd kissed the last finger; only then did you dare look into her eyes. Your hands led hers to the place where your heart was beating wildly beneath your ribs. You wanted her to hear something that could not be falsified or embellished. Your eyes were hopelessly in love with the girl in front of you and your heart sang under the warmth of her hand. It belonged exclusively to her. Your heart became hers, irrevocably held hostage. At that moment, you finally found the right words and hastened to express everything that you had kept in your heart for so long. You spoke calmly:
- I should probably apologize, first of all for what I didn't say, and secondly for the tears you shed because of my thoughtless actions...
You paused briefly before continuing on a new line while your hand pressed hers closer to your aching heart:
- All my good memories are connected with you; you're always by my side, and I want to repay you in kind every day of my life. If I said you were dear to me, it would be a lie. My heart aches in your presence, and this pain makes me feel alive... You make me pine for you and my soul is captivated solely by you, mistress of my heart.
It took you another pause to recollect your thoughts, you had too many things to say, but not everything can be said out loud, you would allow only the most sincere and pure statements of your heart to leave your mouth:
- I cannot ask you to reciprocate my feelings, and yet I want you to know that you are my heartbeat and the blood that flows through my veins. I love you, Shelly.
You did it. Silence fell on the terrace, broken by the gentle rustle of the wisteria swaying in the wind. You felt as if another second of silence and your heart wouldn't be able to take it anymore, your pulse would die down, and you would collapse, a cold body, before her.
You obsessively absorbed every emotion she gifted you, every subtle change in her facial expression. And you awaited the mercy of her response, whether she would grant you the greatest happiness in your life, or whether you would hear a heartbreaking rejection. Could you even bear her rejection?
You didn't have to think about it for long; you felt the warmth of her lips on yours. Time seemed to stand still for you, and only after a few seconds did you finally think to return her kiss, greedily and yet tenderly pressing your lips against hers. As soon as she pulled away from you, she took your hand and guided it to her heart, just as you had done earlier. You heard the beat of her heart, so similar to the rhythm of your own.
This time, you stared at her smile, so pure and bright, in disbelief at your happiness. You felt a lone tear begin to roll down your cheek, but Shelly quickly brushed it away before kissing the salty mark on your cheek.
The last thing that made your heart beat in rhythm with hers was her own words:
- "I love you too."
Such simple words for such powerful emotions, but for you, they were enough. The heart spoke louder than words.