Chapter Text
True love.
You’ve felt it before.
They say it’s impossible to feel again.
It’s been centuries since you last saw your ex-husband, Fount of Knowledge, but ever since deceit swallowed him whole, you never thought you would love again. It felt as if his pure soul was banished into a prison of his own creation. Yearning for his return was how you spent most of your time after he was sealed.
He was your everything.
He was yours.
Now, you’ve moved on. You’ve remarried to his majesty Pure Vanilla Cookie. It’s like he’s everything that made you fall in love with Fount. Everything but the fact he wasn’t him. You truly loved both of them. But you couldn’t help but long for the man you loved before.
You woke up in a shiver for the fifth night in a row. You’ve been having constant nightmares recently, with no idea why. You turned to the clock-
5:47 AM
The same time you woke up every night now. You turned to your husband, praying to the witches he was awake, but he laid there. Still, you got out of the bed. Careful to not make a sound as you walked to your writing desk.
As you grabbed an envelope and some paper to write a letter, your husband noticed the lack of warmth by his side and woke up.
“Darling, why are you awake? It’s so early…” He said, his words laced with worry that he failed to hide.
“Don’t worry, my love. Just… writing back a friend.”
You said. Hiding what you were truly doing. You felt guilty hiding this from the one you love, but you needed answers.
“You know you don’t have to hide things from me, my god(dess)… if something is bothering you-“
“I know, Pure Vanilla Cookie…” You said, attempting to get him to stop digging in what was troubling you.
You wanted to tell him. But you couldn’t.
Would he understand?
No… there’s no way he’d understand.
Right?…
You walked away from your desk. Leaving the half-written letter there, planning to finish it in the morning.
You reached for the doorknob, thoughts racing like a marathon before they were interrupted-
“Wait.” Your husband spoke, whether he was asking or demanding you couldn’t decipher. “You’ve been running away from your problems for the past week. If you need me to delay my trip to Beast-Yeast to stay with you, you can tell me… I just… I just hate you thinking you have to bear this weight alone.”
Right. You almost completely forgot he was going to Beast-Yeast. You strongly didn’t want him to, knowing everything that could happen to him.
The odds against him were too strong. You couldn’t let him do this. Certainly not alone. But you weren’t stupid. You knew he would have to do it eventually. And delaying him could spell the end of cookiekind.
He didn’t know you knew why he was going. He didn’t even know you knew Elder Faerie Cookie. He truly didn’t even know about that kingdom being true. You would’ve told him if he asked, but…
But there was no promise he’d fully understand you or your past. You were better with not telling him. You loved him truly, yes. But your past was long behind you. Your adventures had carried out long as you can remember. Yet you never truly forgot him…
You decided it was best not to think about him for now. You’d rather think about your current life. Dwelling on the past felt beyond you.
“Pure Vanilla Cookie?” You continued. This next question you knew well he might not take kindly. He loved you, truly. Asking to do this with him… he never knew you were in Beast-Yeast some of your life. There’s a lot he didn’t know. You nevertheless asked anyway.
“Yes, darling?” He said. Interrupting your thoughts, somewhat. He was looking at you with reverence. Very much not expecting what you were planning next. Probably thinking you’d ask to go on a cute little date or something.
“I’d like to go with you. To Beast-Yeast. I know it’s dangerous-“
“Wha- no! I can’t risk you getting hurt! You’re my only lover! I can’t- I’d never forgive myself if you got hurt! Much less crumbled! Who knows what could happen to you…”
You knew he’d say something like that. You understand why he would. But you knew the ins and outs of Beast-Yeast like a cookie who’d lived there for years. Well, how it looked before. You know how to handle yourself. You’ve been on many adventures before you met Pure Vanilla, but you didn’t really tell him the details. He doesn’t know anything before you got to Crispia, though.
“Pure Vanilla, please. You know I can handle it, you know I can! Why must you treat me like I’m incapable of staying alive alone?” You almost begged for an answer. Searching deep in his eyes for a sliver of relent. Yet, you found none.
“I’m sorry my dearest, but I can’t really let myself do that… you’re too special to me, I can’t- I can’t let myself get you into harm’s way. You’re too important.” He spoke, holding your hands close to his chest before kissing the back of your hand gentlemanly.
You swore you heard something just like this before. Right before Fount- no. Don’t think about him. It’ll make everything easier.
Before you could gather your thoughts, you excused yourself to the bathroom. When you locked the door, you sinked down on the tile. The ceramic feeling making everything worse.
“You have to stay here. Just imagine everything that could hurt you if you left! You wanna be safe, right? There’s no place anywhere near that’s as safe as the Spire!” His voice echoed in your mind as much as your own. You could feel your blood rushing inside of you.
All you could remember is how it felt being so powerless, knowing full well what your lover was doing, yet you couldn’t stop him.
Maybe if you caught on you could’ve… you could’ve stopped him. But you didn’t. Was this truly all your fault? No, no… he- he would’ve told you! Right?…
No! This had to be your fault! Cookies came to him for knowledge every single day! They loved asking him questions! Yet.. he corrupted. You had no choice, but did you?
No. It wasn’t your fault, not at all. It couldn’t have been! If you were the problem, wouldn’t he cut you out completely instead of begging you to stay with him? It doesn’t make any sense! You need answers, and you need them soon.
You stood up after your breathing slowed to be manageable. Looking in the mirror, you knew what you had to say. And if he still said no? Oh you’re gonna sneak onto that god-forsaken airship if it’s your last crumbling wish.
As you walked out of the bathroom conjoined with you and your husband’s bedroom, you saw no sign of the bright truth-seeking cookie. The only remnant of him being a note on the dresser. You started reading it.
Dearest Y/N,
Now, I know fair and well you won’t even ponder relenting on this. I would love to listen to your reasoning, yet I have to meet with the others to discuss some things. I should be back before sunset. Now, once I get back, you can fully explain why you ask to come with me for my adventure in Beast-Yeast.
He went to a freaking meeting. It always seems like he’s in a god forsaken meeting. Is he serious?
You know who’d never abandon you?
No. Do not think about him. You can’t be longing for someone gone like this. Especially not… him. He left you! Well… not really, huh? Each time you think about it it just… seemed like you wanted to return to that time so badly, but you loved your current husband.
Did you want both of them?
No. That’s too… that’s too greedy, right? They were both so amazing in their own ways. Yet, so different. The harder you think about it, you truly want it. Yet, you never formally broke up with your Fount… not like you can, though. Ugh… why did you leave so abruptly?
You walked back to your writing desk, planning to finish your letter to Elder Faerie Cookie. You needed answers, and you needed them now.