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“... We… aren’t gonna let that happen…” Susie whispered into the humid nighttime air as droplets began to rain down and hit against her scales.
“... right?”
She received no answer, only the silent cacophony of leaves rustling amidst the quickening downpour. It felt like a cruel joke. After everything she went through today… of course she’d be subjected to such a ‘goodnight.’ Yet, even then, she couldn’t take her mind off the prophecy. It felt more important than such petty inconveniences. More important than her, even.
She kicked at the gravel-littered driveway with her wet and beaten shoes. The small pebbles didn’t go far but made ripples in the puddles forming on the ground around her.
Besides, she didn’t want to think about what she’d just witnessed at Kris’s house. She’d been betrayed by too many mentor-figures for one day. She’d felt so many feelings in such a short amount of time… it was disorienting to look back on. God… it really has only been a day, huh?
Continuing to kick the ground, she sauntered over to the end of the Dreemurr’s driveway. More memories of the past several hours flooded her mind but she found it hard to focus on anyone in particular. Images and voices crowded her senses underneath the immediate and real static of the rain. Her movement was slow and aimless, not thinking about where she’d go to finally get a good night’s rest.
However, the more she ruminated on the past day’s adventures, the more a particular face seemed to create a pattern amongst the noise. A soft, smiling—although at times, strained, face. Ralsei’s face. He proved to be a constant throughout the ruckus of the darkworld’s chaos. Whether he served to be a relieving image or yet another stressor, though more prevalent, truly depended. Susie noticed that focusing on him brought up the most emotions in her chest at the time, and instead of returning to the numbing rumination that had previously occupied her cognition, she decided to explore these feelings.
He had said so many different things to her. Many of them brought up strong emotions like pity, guilt, and even anger. That last one came back the strongest, even if she felt a little bad for it. She remembered when she had felt like this earlier. One moment came to mind particularly.
“Just forget about us and make some real friends, okay?”
Just thinking about his facade of a smile at that instance made Susie’s cold-blood boil. “How can you SAY that??” was her response then, and still now as well.
How could he say that, though… doesn’t he know how stupid it is…?
Susie’s anger subsided to a more resigned grief. She felt her movement grow only more sluggish as she approached the intersection next to the Cattenheimer’s house.
It’s not fair. What does it matter that Ralsei’s just an object… Lancer? Queen? Tenna? What does it matter if they’re “not real”... My feelings for them are real. Our friendships are real!!
“I wish Ralsei would realize…” Susie heard her voice echo out in her mind again, “that it doesn’t matter to me so much.”
She had stumbled to the next intersection near QC’s by now. The rain hadn’t let up but she didn’t notice it so much anymore. Her mind was too caught up on Ralsei’s words and their interaction in the dark world at Kris’s place for her to care about the drops of water hitting her calloused scales and dark, slick hair.
My feelings for Ralsei… they’re real. They’re what matter. She kicked at the pavement in front of the convenience store. The neon “clopen” sign was still illuminated, even at this late hour.
And so are Ralsei’s! He’s said it himself… he has feelings, he has wants and desires. Why can’t he understand that that’s what really matters?
“Normal objects don’t have… feelings!” the sound of her angered voice made her wince. She found herself wondering what she meant when she said that… What did it mean to her in the moment?
“That’s right, Susie,” Ralsei’s solemn whisper responded, “they shouldn’t.”
“And why not??” she happened to shout for all the trees in Hometown to hear. “Why shouldn’t they? Huh??”
Her instinct to challenge Ralsei’s dehumanizing way of thinking started to conflict with her own words, and it was winning. She wasn’t about to let him get away with it this time, even if it was only in retrospect.
And that really got Susie thinking. Past the mere gut reaction she had, she started to think about the meaning behind her words. If Ralsei has feelings and so does every other darkner I’ve met, then when does that stop? Why should it stop? Outside of the darkworlds, they’re still… them, right?
Just then, a certain house caught her eye. It was tall and in a strange shape that resembled a ghastly figure at night; like if a house had died and decided to haunt the plot in front of her. But it didn’t take long for her to realize why it stood out to her. This was the house that she gave Tenna to!
And there it was again. Another catalyst for introspection. Suddenly, Susie was back in her mind and on the verge of a breakthrough.
Tenna… even as a regular ‘ol TV, I cared about him. I never stopped caring about him and I would certainly never stop caring about any other darkner! My feelings for them are real and that’s what matters. Who cares if they’re all objects? Who cares if that’s all they’ll ever be??
“If all the darkworlds in Hometown disappeared today, that wouldn’t change how I treat any of my friends. Not Lancer, not Tenna, and certainly not Ralsei!!” Susie shouted at the stone face of the ghost-house. “I could never remove my love for Ralsei, even if he was only an object forever!”
Her cheeks were hot and she was breathing heavily, even in the cold autumn rain. She wanted to keep screaming, she wanted Ralsei to know that it really didn’t matter to her! It never did! She was grateful that she had the chance to get to know Ralsei in all his quirks and flaws and she wouldn’t have had it happen any other way. But if she could no longer meet with him under the illusion of a darkworld… she thinks that it’d still be okay.
But that hasn’t happened… The darkworlds are still open. She still can see Ralsei there…
Suddenly, without staying to catch her breath from her earlier screaming any longer, Susie’s old black shoes pivoted against the slick asphalt road and she propelled herself back the other way. She didn’t waste any time and she didn’t care how desperate she looked. No one was around to see her anyways. She continued sprinting as fast as her tired legs could take her, back to the intersection, farther down the road, and making another sharp turn past the “librarby” until she reached the school.
It stood in front of her, dark and looming, almost as if the rain was melting its brick walls and gray columns like a moody oil painting. The large, black doors, bearing the imposing Delta Rune, took on the silhouette of a void and reminded her of the church's darkworld. But she didn’t delay. Shoving herself into the side of one of the doors, it opened with a thud against her sturdy body. She was relieved for a brief second that it was still unlocked before she continued running through the halls, almost slipping against the slick tiled floor.
At last, she reached the back of the large building and came to an abrupt stop before the supply closet doors. They looked as if they mirrored the outside of the school. So, in a similar fashion, and without hesitation, she threw herself against their dark surface and fell, haphazardly, into the even darker abyss below.
A loud “thud!” announced her arrival into Castletown. Susie had hit the ground a little harder than usual in her exhausted state. Even then, her body was fueled with determination and she continued to strut into the town center where Ralsei was normally waiting for her and Kris. She supposed that she couldn’t expect Ralsei to be there now, since it was midnight. But still, it was a bit strange given the lack of a day-night contrast in the darkworld.
Regardless, she continued on through the town towards the castle where she was sure she’d find the Prince. Upon entering the foyer, the cauldron bubbling still, she took a left up the stairs to the second floor. She would’ve rushed right past her own room and up to the third floor, continuing towards Ralsei’s, if it wasn’t for the fact that her door was slightly ajar. She came to a halt before it and calmed her movements.
Carefully wrapping her large claw around the edge of the door, Susie opened it inwards as quietly as she could manage.
“Who- who’s there…?” a meek and timid voice drifted into the doorway.
“It’s… it’s Susie.” the dragon answered in a low, conflicted tone, body still outlined by the door frame.
Ralsei looked shocked. He was sitting on the edge of her bed, legs dangling precariously between the large spikes. “S-Susie!! I… didn’t expect to see you again.”
“Yeah I… uhm… couldn’t get any sleep.” she shrugged as she entered into the room.
“Oh! W-well, feel free to rest here!” Ralsei said as he stood up off the bed.
“Hey! Sit back down!” Susie demanded before she plopped onto the firm mattress next to Ralsei. “I need to talk to you… but first, what’re you doing in my room anyways…?”
“Oh, uhm… I guess I couldn’t sleep either…?” He tried not to make eye contact while speaking. The two of them were shoulder to shoulder now.
It was silent for a second while Ralsei waited for Susie to speak again. She seemed focused on something, like she was trying to collect her thoughts.
“Okay, well… I’ve just been thinking.” Susie finally said, sounding a little more deflated than she would’ve liked. “I’ve been thinking about some of the stuff you’ve said.”
Ralsei met her eyes again but she was staring at her lap. He tried to get a read of her face before responding, “Like what…?”
“Like… some of the stuff you said back before we were interrupted by Tenna. About the darkworlds and stuff–” she was fiddling with her thumbs.
“O-oh, yes, well… like I said before, Susie, me and the other darkners can’t do everything that you lightners can and… well, that’s because we aren’t real like you are and we don’t matter like you do–”
“No, stop!!” Susie interrupted Ralsei’s familiar rambling. “Don’t you get it?? I never got to finish my thought then but I– I need to get it out now!”
Ralsei looked mortified, it seemed he too was too tired to be hiding his emotions after today. Even still, Susie didn’t seem affected. She was huffing and in a fit, but still stayed seated next to the Prince.
“Ralsei I– I don’t care!!” she eventually shouted.
“Susie!??”
“No, Ralsei, I don’t care! I don’t care that you– that everyone– I don’t care that you’re all objects! It doesn’t matter to me!!” she huffed and puffed, “I wish that you’d realize that…”
The air was thick and still. Water rested and glistened on Susie’s scales and, if Ralsei hadn’t known any better, he could’ve mistaken it for sweat. Her whole upper-body was heaving slightly as she breathed. Her gaze was far and removed but Ralsei was turned towards her, keeping his eyes fixed in the general direction of her face.
Eventually, he decided he should say something. “Susie…?”
She was slowly removed from her trance and turned to face Ralsei, who was still staring at her, bewildered.
“Look, Ralsei, I’ve been thinkin’ for the past hour… I just… I don’t think it matters to me. What you are.”
“I– I’m glad to hear that, Susie…”
“No, I don’t think you get it.” Susie almost seemed like she would grab Ralsei by the shoulders, but she held back. “Ralsei, if this darkworld disappeared, right now… I just don’t think it’d matter to me that you’re still an object. I care about you, Ralsei. You do have feelings and I think that you always will, no matter what you are.”
Ralsei was at a loss for words and hesitated to respond. Eventually, though, he decided that he couldn’t add anything meaningful and settled on leaning against Susie’s tense arm instead.
Susie remained stiff at first but inevitably gave into the contact and leaned back into Ralsei’s small figure.
“You don’t need to understand… Honestly, I don’t understand, but…” her voice sounded choked, like she was about to cry, “I just know that it really doesn’t matter what you are. If my friend is only a card or something… as long as I can still call you my friend… you’ll always be Ralsei to me…”
Ralsei felt himself tearing up as well. He pushed his face into his fluffy ear, against Susie’s arm, and started to sob lightly. The sound of his small quakes caused Susie herself to start crying, something she’d yet to do in front of him. They stayed like this for a long time, until their faces hurt and were even more tired.
“Y-you’re right… I don’t understand, Susie.” Ralsei spoke through shaky breaths, “And… well, I still can’t wrap my mind around how you care so much… but… I’ll try my best to be a good friend for you… even if it does make my heart hurt.”
“You couldn’t be a bad friend if you tried, Rals…” Susie responded after bated breaths. “ ‘s kinda what I’m getting at… heh…”
Ralsei smiled at that and they both slowly stopped crying. Susie let out a yawn after some silence which caused Ralsei to lift himself up off of her a bit.
“Susie, you– if you don’t have anywhere to sleep, you could sleep here?” he said to her, standing up.
“Thanks, thought you’d never offer.” she chuckled.
“Haha, anytime, Susie.”