Chapter Text
The first part Ascot registered were the voices.
"It's always difficult-"
The words themselves were garbled gibberish, but the fact that people were speaking, well, yelling, for the most part, came through. Trying to make sense of it just made his already pounding headache even worse. As if the sensation of pins and needles throughout his entire body and low-key nausea weren't enough.
"-during the tragedy-"
The next was the familiar nudges from a fluffy head against his face. Familiar, yet… off, somehow. Like someone had just moved everything slightly to the right, or added a pinch of spice to an old recipe that never called for it, there was a feeling of subtle wrongness, not blatant enough to determine an exact cause but enough to be felt regardless.
"I'm fine…" He mumbled, giving Vigor a friendly swat on the nose to make him stop. That felt off, too. Was there something wrong with his voice? Why did it feel so awkward using his hand? If he was napping, why was he sleeping on the hard ground and not the backs of one of the beasties? Did Vigor shove him off? So rude. Sure, Ascot was a heavy sleeper, but that didn't mean-
"These are pajamas-"
Clef? What was Clef doing here? Oh, that's right, the lesson! He'd been doing his warmups, and- That was all he could recall. Was there some sort of accident? Was Umi okay? He opened his eyes. Vigor and Capella stood there, watching him closely. They were fine, at least. He rolled his head to the other side, towards the yelling.
"-use it properly!"
Was that Clef and… himself? That couldn't be right. He blinked twice, but the image remained the same. Slowly and groggily, he pushed himself up, rubbing his eyes, only to open them and find himself even more confused. This wasn't his outfit. This wasn't his hair. This wasn't even his body.
"-you pervert!"
It wasn't just any body, either. This was the body of none other than Umi Ryuuzaki.
Ascot short-circuited.
~
Not long ago…
A short distance from the calamity, a spherical glow preceded the appearance of three figures. Once they became fully corporeal, one collapsed in a heap, another quickly knelt down to check on them, and the third fell to their knees in exhaustion.
"Clef, what the fuck did you do?" The shortest one panted, trying to pull themselves up by their elaborate staff.
"I beg your pardon? I just saved our lives, no thanks to you!" The other conscious one snapped back, standing up to turn and glare at them through large brown bangs. "If you'd just listened and stuck to studying the scrolls like I told you-"
"Well, maybe if you actually let me try something fun once in a while-" She stood up fully.
"This is exactly why I don't!" Clef rubbed his temples, "Umi, you asked me to teach you magic, and I'm trying, but you've got to take it seriously if you want to progress!"
"I'm a fucking Magic Knight, how much more serious does it get?!" She took a few steps forward, before tripping on the robes, catching herself with the staff just in time to keep from hitting the dirt.
"If you spent as much time on the theory as you do complaining about it, I'd have you doing practical magic by now!" He tried to shove the hair out of his eyes, only to have it fall back into place a few seconds later.
"Just how's anybody supposed to learn anything from those boring-ass scrolls? I swear, whoever wrote them must be the most tedious, self-important shit in Cephiro with no friends 'cause they bored them all to death years ago!" Umi bunched up the excess train of the robes, and held it off to the side.
"… I wrote those." Clef raised an eyebrow, pushing the hair back again. One side stayed in place, but the other fell immediately, and when he tried push that back, both sides fell.
"Well, that explains it." She said derisively.
"Oh, just stop acting like this was my fault! Ascot was practicing lightning magic, anybody with sense could've figured out casting water magic nearby was bound to go horribly wrong! At this rate, you'll be lucky if I let you pour tea again!"
Umi looked like she was about to start arguing again, but instead she glanced behind him, then started wrapping the robe excess around her arm.
"How is he?"
"What?" Clef asked, pushing the hair aside again. To his satisfaction, it actually stayed in place this time.
"Ascot. You're in his body and I'm in yours, so that means he's in mine, right? Is he okay?" She finished with the wrapping and looked back up.
Before he could answer, the ground beneath them trembled, the forests surrounding them shook, and creatures suddenly scattered in every direction. Two bounding beasts broke through the foliage and slid to a stop at the side of their now unconscious feminine-appearing summoner. The massive brown canine nudged the body gently, while the giant amphibious humanoid stood there looking mildly concerned.
"They still recognize him?" Umi asked, a finger on her chin as she watched the two creatures curiously.
"Of course they do!" Clef snapped, then turned his attention back to the beasts, "He's all right, that body just hasn't built up decent magic immunity. He'll wake up soon enough. You two should-" He was rudely cut off when the canine shot a warning blast a few feet over his hat, just close enough for him to feel the heat. A few trees behind him caught fire, and Umi started to laugh.
"Thanks, Vigor!" She called out. Sighing in exasperation, Clef muttered a water spell under his breath. Instantly, a cloud formed above Umi and drenched her in a downpour.
"Hey!" Umi yelled, quickly darting out from under the tiny storm, "What's the big idea?"
"Oh, my apologies." Clef said in the most insincere tone of voice he could manage. "Different bodies process magic differently. It's always difficult to aim right the first time." He muttered the same spell again, and this time two clouds formed, one directly over the flames and the other, once again, over Umi. She tripped over the robes trying to escape, covering herself in mud.
"Don't even try to tell me that wasn't on purpose!" She yelled again.
"I won't." He replied smugly. Umi let out a frustrated growl, dropped the staff, pulled the sleeves of the now soaked outer robes off and then tried to remove the entire ensemble. The chest piece got stuck going over her head.
"Mind telling me how you get this deathtrap off?" She yelled. Clef smirked slightly, crossing his arms.
"Figure it out yourself. This is the best entertainment I've had all day."
"I swear, if you don't tell me, I'm going to break this fucking thing!" She threatened, trying to angle it differently to see if that worked any better. It didn't.
"Like to see you try." He scoffed, before reluctantly adding, "The headpiece has to come off first."
"Now you tell me!" Umi shoved the piece back down, then pulled the horned diadem off and threw it on the ground.
"Hey, be careful with that!" Clef held out his hand.
"Oh, sorry, didn't realize this fucking fashion disaster of an outfit meant so much to you!" She pulled the rest of the outer robes over her head, then tossed them unceremoniously in the dirt next to the headpiece, "I thought you just lost all your sensible clothes during the tragedy and had to make do with an abandoned tent."
"Those are Guru's Robes, worn only by the most accomplished and highest esteemed magic user in the land. They command respect, I'll have you know."
"Right, so much respect you can get away with wearing your pajamas underneath?" She quipped, motioning to the grey turtleneck shirt and harem pants she was wearing. Clef was going to say something, but then had to pause and think about it. Umi's eyes lit up deviously.
"These are pajamas, aren't they!" She accused, laughing.
"They're a comfortable unadorned shirt and pants set meant not to detract from the elaborate robes. The fact that they can also be used as pajamas is irrelevant. Stop being so childish." Clef sighed, "I'll just take this back-" He bent down to pick up the staff, but Umi quickly snatched it up.
"No! It's mine now!" She jumped back, now moving much quicker without the robes in the way.
"You don't even know how to use it properly!" Clef made a grab for her, but Umi swiped at him with the staff. He just barely dodged.
"I can still use it to hit people." She argued, running around behind him, "It doesn't match your outfit, anyway."
"It doesn't match any outfit!" He pivoted around and kept after her.
"Ah! So you agree that it looks completely ridiculous?" Umi zigzagged around some trees and forest brush.
"I made it when I was first starting out! I was young!"
"How young? Was it as far back as your early one-hundreds?" While she was distracted laughing at her own comment, Clef finally got a hold, snatching her up with his right arm, effectively pinning her arms to her side, and taking the staff in his left.
"Let go of me, you pervert!" Umi kicked her little legs wildly.
"Umi, you're in my body!" He protested incredulously.
"Keep your kinks to yourself, just let me go!"
"Only if you promise to stop acting like a child." Umi looked up at him with a sort of glaring pout. Clef looked down at her expectantly, waiting for an answer.
She blew in his face. Clef's bangs dislodged from their carefully placed position, temporarily obscuring his sight, and in his surprise, Umi managed to slip out of his grip. She stole the staff back, and ran off while he was getting the hair back in place.
"Why, you-" Clef started, about to run after her, but he was suddenly grabbed by a giant green hand and suspended off the ground. He struggled a bit, then looked up and behind him to find Capella kneeling down. He didn't do anything other than keep a firm grip on the Guru, something the beast didn't appear have the least bit of trouble with. Actually, he looked quite bored. Clef turned back to the front, exasperatedly twisting his lips.
"AHHHH!" Meanwhile, Vigor had quickly caught up to Umi, and was now bringing her back, tied up in his tail. The staff lay abandoned a short distance away.
"Serves you right." Clef scoffed, causing his hair to fall back in his face once again, "Oh, for pillar's sake!"
"What's the meaning of this-" Umi began lividly, only for her rage to subside abruptly at the sight of something else, "Oh."
"What is it?"
"Ascot's awake."
~
Much earlier that morning…
According to Earth time, it was 'Friday'. Not that it made any difference to Guru Clef. Merely an observation on his calendar, part of his attempt to reconcile the flow of time in the Magic Knight's universe with his own. Well, whatever universe's time he was using, this schedule just wasn't going to work.
Clef frowned, observing the projection of grouped magic runes in front of him. Two lessons before the Interstellar Council meeting? How could he have had such a lapse in judgement? A closer look at the two students scheduled answered that question for him.
"Oh. Right. Umi." Clef muttered. She'd expressed an interest in learning more magic, and he obliged by making time for at least one lesson whenever the three girls were there. He'd probably just seen the opening and scheduled it thoughtlessly, forgetting there was a reason for that. Best mark preparation time on the calendar in the future, he supposed.
"Hmm… Perhaps…" Another look at the calendar gave him an idea. He waved his hand, combining the two lessons into the later slot, then stood back and observed with satisfaction. There. Normally, Clef wouldn't dare to make Ascot share a lesson, given his uneasy relationship with other Cephirans in general, but in this case, he was pretty sure he could make an exception. If Umi had gotten beyond magic theory, that might have given him a little more concern, but as is, he felt he could keep an eye on her as she did her scrollwork while instructing Ascot on his magic.
Briefly, a sliver of doubt crept into his mind. Umi wasn't exactly a low-maintenance student. What about that time she and Ferio knocked down all the shelves in the library? He hadn't even been gone more than fifteen minutes. Or the time he found out she was spiking her tea with Chizetan Rum when he wasn't looking? Where had she even gotten ahold of Chizetan Rum in the first place?
Clef shook his head to clear the doubts. It'd be fine. Ascot would be no trouble whatsoever, it would be easy to keep an eye on the both of them, even if Umi could be a little unpredictable sometimes.
Really, what was the worse that could happen?