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White. Everything around was white. Even the sky, which was dropping snow as if someone up there was crying, asking for an end, for a rest, for anyone. It wasn’t something unusual for Blackrock region, just a simple Monday, if you let me say so, but the growing growling blizzard and its power was indeed shocking, even exciting, terrifying. It was sounding as if some unknown beast was willing to tear someone apart out of pure bitterness kept inside, and, there actually was someone, who could be the victim of cruel and sharp frost. An Inphernal was walking through pure white fields all alone, not wearing even a single coat or any other kind of clothes that could keep him warm, just his signature outfit, except for the most important and recognisable mask. Nothing else. No one could find him in that weather. No one could see his bright-pink horns, no one could see a crystal that was slowly fading, losing its light, become paler and paler. Not even black clothes could’ve been noticed on such a snow storm. His white hair became a one soft lash under wind’s pressure, hitting his neck, face and shoulders every move and blow.
Why would he go out? Why would he go here? Well…the reason might be strange, out of his character maybe.
Inpernal kept walking through deep snowdrifts, which were trying to devour him every step he made, scratching over his shaking legs, calling for him, asking him to let them enjoy the taste of his rotten body, and white-haired truly wanted to fall into this cold cuddles, but…No, not here. Just a little further. Just a little further and he’ll drown in snow, just a few more steps, yes, just…a…few.
His legs shook, there wasn’t any strength left in them anymore. The second he understood that he no longer can continue this serene and tranquil walk threw empty fields, his body became heavy so bad that in the moment inphernal had a thought that his limbs are going to be shattered into pieces if he’ll decline snowdrift’s offer for a rest one more time. In just a moment he was laying on his back, in the snow, while heavily breathing, trying to get as much frozen air in his weak lungs as possible, eyes was beginning for recreation, his teeth ached from all of breaths and cold they were dipped in, whole body was whining, asking for all of this to end.
He was dying from cruel blizzard, from scalding and yet cold hug which immersed him in deeper and deeper weakness, from all of his mistakes made somewhere in past, from all consequences. Inphernal watched soft and sensitive skies, which kept crying, searching and begging for someone to help them, this is the last thing his sloppy eyes will ever see. This innocent cry for help from above was so honest, so precious, so beautiful, he wanted to enjoy this vulnerable moment for a little longer, but his strength left him, gently closing his eyes, while white and soft flakes continued to fall on his pathetic and broken body.
So…Who is Subspace T. Mine?
He surely is Blackrock’s greatest inventor! Best in his kind. But not only that, right?..
Subspace is someone, who’d never be truly loved. No one would voluntarily accept that he can be the one who you trust, who you keep nearby when you fell down, in whose arms you can easily fall when you need to. He is disgusting. His scars, marks, rot are mapped on him as if he was turned inside out with purpose of showing his true face through own body.
And that makes sense. All of Subspace’s actions, his inventions, sometimes cruel and immoral experiments and passions, temper and character, nothing of that is giving trust. If you think about it there actually is no one, who truly cares about him, he’s a husk of what he’d be. Even Biografts, they only care and do something for him, because of program that Inphernal made for them. Without it they’d smite him without any doubt or regret.
He’s not someone important for his own land, which he cared about badly. He is just a gear in all of Blackrock-Mech and mess, no one truly appreciated.
He’s not the one, who’ll be with ANYONE someday.
And today’s morning Subspace realised all of that. He felt terrible. Empty. He wanted to cry, but he just couldn’t. Eyes weren’t going wet and they didn’t let tears fall down. He felt even more terrible. After a few hours of work, he slightly cut his arm by accident, and fact, that there was no one to help him with that finished him. Never before Subspace noticed how lonely he actually was. He had enough, he wanted this loneliness to end, he demanded for someone to be with him, he truly needed this, but, there was no one and there wouldn’t be. Subspace knew it. He knew that he’ll never be with this somebody. So he decided to give up on everything and let his precious and beautiful land devour and dig his body into the deep, pure white blizzards. That’s the best death he thought of. At least he’ll give his life to something that he was standing for his entire life. Subspace also was afraid to shove something sharp into his body, chocking on your own blood is indeed terrifying and…cruel. Thinking like that is very egoistic though.
Maybe this wish to become one with Blackrock’s landscapes was impulsive, but that was the thing which inventor wanted. And he fulfilled this wish, leaving this world with last breath and last sight on beautiful sight on native skies of homeland.
Or did he?—
Of course…This sense and calm way of leaving all of loneliness behind isn’t what Subspace deserved. He heard a familiar voice through sticky cuddles of fluffy white snow and sweet slumber. Voice was calling for him. Inventor tried to open his eyes out of pure curiosity but captivating weakness fascinated him, but those chains of bliss shattered the second Subspace felt something warm wrapping his shoulders and arms. He abruptly opened his eyes, staring to breathe heavily as if he woke up straight from a ghoulish and vile nightmare, wasn’t this slumber a blessing? His vision was blurry at first but he still recognised his rescuer, wanting to die the moment he understood, who was sitting on his left. It was Medkit. Such an embarrassment. Subspace wanted to rush back from him, ran away as far and fast as possible, anything to forget and make this face disappear. Inventor looked at him with eyes full of not only confusion but hate and scorn.
—So you are alive. Ugh, okay, good…
Medkit stood up on his legs, shook of snow from his knees and started to stare at Subspace. He looked pathetic.
—Come on, get up.
—What…are you doing here…
—I’m here not to spoil tea with you, get up, Subspace T. Mine.
Inventor just fell of reality for a second. If he’s already dead and he’s just having before-death sights, then it’s the worst sights he could ever had and he better die faster, but if not and it is actually Medkit standing here, then what is even happening? Subspace came here not to continue his suffering, he ran away here from his loneliness, he came here to put it an end, put a bold dot on a greatest Blackrock’s researcher and brain. He was even a little perturbed, but mostly depressed and disappointed.
—No…I have no idea why you came here for me, but you must leave. Now…I…I’m not going anywhere with you or without.
—Oh, bloody hell…
Medkit exhaled, he was outraged, annoyed.
—Listen, I’m absolutely not pleased with all of that as well. I was sent here just to find you and bring you to certain someone. The man himself. I don’t really like it as well, okay? Just. Just let me do my job, you can freeze to death any day later.
With face full of disgust he looked from upside on a Subspace, who was innocently laying in a snow and also watching from downside, he looked absolutely pitiful, in a bad way.
—No respond? Oh, sure. At least could you give me back a cloak i brought?
Only after that words Subspace realised that he actually was wrapped in it. It was very warm and soft, even when snow crawled in it, it still felt cosy and comfortable, as if a hug which inventor really needed. For some reason he felt a little guilty in front of Medkit, so, with a few seconds of thinking, he decided to at least try to get up and follow doctor, so he doesn’t die with sticky and sloppy feeling of guilt.
It was very hard for him to stand up, legs still were whining and begging for just a little more rest, shaking terribly.
—Uh…Offering a hand would very sweet, Meddy.
Last word was said with extreme contempt and hatred.
—As long as you have your own legs you’ll handle it by your own. Come on now, I am very curious, why would you go in the middle of nowhere to get a frostbite.
—Are you serious right now? Who do you think you are?!…Who do you think I am to tell such things to someone like you? And why are you…Starting a talk? You didn’t want to spoil tea with me, right?!
—I don’t know, but that would be music for my ears to hear you cry. Also, now that you mentioned that…I guess it’d be a pleasure for me to hear you whining and crying about how pathetic of an inphernal you are. So speak up, Subspace.
—Shut the hell up…
Both went silent.
Eternal white fields were growing, there was no end of them, they truly was the perfect representation of what despair and emptiness might be. Blizzard damped down. It was no longer slapping and hitting anyone with tiny ice pieces and flakes. Everything was so suspiciously peaceful, as if it was a calm before the storm, though storm has just ended.
Medkit was walking a little further than Subspace, who was stumbling and drowning in snowdrifts. Suddenly, doctor slowed down a little bit so his companion could catch up to him. This pink pest was getting on his nerves by just being nearby.
—You know, Subspace…
—What?…
—I’ve just thought that it would be so good to lose second eye.
—What the…W-why?
—Because I can no longer handle how pathetic you are. It truly is a punishment to watch you breath and suffer here with no will to help or assist you. I’m even starting to feel guilty. I would love to shoot you right here and right now, but I have a life, people, who care about me, so I have to do, what I am supposed to do. Not only to keep myself safe, but them as well. Not like a certain someone.
Every word Medkit said was striking straight to Subspace’s mind, sticking and bleeding there with cold blood and pus, immediately becoming rot moment after, it was so painful, so disrespectful and so rude, those words spread new waves of weakness and ache throughout all body, and while inventor suffered from each and every word, Medkit didn’t change in face even once, staying absolutely callous and ruthless. He indeed hated Subspace with every part of his heart and he never tried to hide from these feelings or decline them, he accepted, knew that they are real for sure. Doctor also never tried giving up on everything, surely, he had bad times, thoughts, but he managed to get through, truly cherishing his life and people around him.
Subspace began to breath more deeply as if he was trying to hold tears. He understood certain things, coming to a little conclusion in his mind, making him feel even worse.
—Why are you saying this. For what? You t-think I don’t know how much you hate me?..
—Because I don’t think that I’ll ever see you again after I bring you to them. You’ll probably end your life, will you?
Something snapped inside Subspaces chest, making his arms terribly shake, and eye go wet. Large round tears started dripping and going down, leaving a wet traces on his cheek. He could no longer breath properly, it was really hard to call such a thing “breathing” it was more of a sobbing, even whining which was cut, shattered and combined back together, making something horrible and pitiful in the end.
—Well, thank you for being honest, Meddy.
Abruptly Subspace rushed a little forward, harshly taking Medkit down and falling right back to snow’s cuddles.
—What the?!-
—THANK YOU, MEDDY, THANK YOU. You know, I hated you too, but I couldn’t imagine, what a person you really are!
WELL I HOPE YOU ARE SATISFIED NOW, BECAUSE I AM DONE WITH YOU AND EVERYTHING.
While Medkit was sitting in total confusion, Subspace held doctor’s revoler, which he took from him while falling, right to his temple, ready to shoot any second.
—I…I hope you are glad. I DO REALLY HOPE YOU ARE.
AND IT’S A PITY THAT THE LAST FACE I’LL SEE IS YOURS, ALL THANKS TO YOU, MEDDY.
With harassing tears, almost no breathe and desperate frown on face, Subspace put one of his hands right onto his horn, while putting finger on a trigger with second.
His hands felt extremely heavy and yet strong for some reason, they were probably boosted and powered by all of despair held in Subspace, all of his sharp thoughts and lastly the conclusion he made after Medkit’s monologue: he could never.
In just one second Medkit heard and saw, how Inphernal who was sitting right in front of him broke his horn and shot himself, putting a bright red messy stripe on innocently white snow, and echo of achingly loud cracking sound paired with clear sound of trigger clicking in his hands. When silence fell back down, devouring in itself all of horror that just happened, soft flakes began falling right on inventer’s body, covering and hiding him from everything and everyone, making sure, that nothing, but homeland can be with him, and that he no longer need to suffer from all of those lonely crying and painful feelings in his workplace or bedroom. No more loneliness, no more no one, no more nothing.Blood was soaking in the snow, it looked as if Blackrock itself got a deep burning wound from a hurtful loss, but it was no longer anything, just a breathless body, which wanted everything to end for sure.
That is who Subspace T. Mine truly was