Chapter Text
It was late afternoon. Rain fell on the mountain, washing over the dirt road and blurring the line between the street and the roadside. A vehicle came down the hill, its tires stained with light mud, the windshield clouded by brown splatter and the violent spray. Inside, twenty-three-year-old Special Week sat in the passenger seat, clutching her swollen belly to brace herself against the bumps in the road. Beside her was her husband, a trainer she had met in college, who had accompanied her to inspect a plot of land they intended to use as a training track for the school where Spe worked.
"When all this is over," he said with a tired smile, "I want to bring Cesario to run here. So she can see where her mom will train when she comes back to the track... even if it's just to teach."
Spe smiled at him. Cesario, their two-year-old daughter, had stayed behind with her best friend, Silence Suzuka, who had agreed to look after her at home. Suzuka and Spe had always been inseparable, and even after the wedding, they had remained close. She loved her husband, and she loved Suzuka too. She knew that if she ever lost either of them, her world would shatter.
Suddenly, as though her thoughts had reached out and touched reality, everything went silent. The vehicle skidded, the tires gave way, and the car veered too far toward the edge of the road. She turned to look at him just as he threw himself toward her to shield her. She noticed he wasn't wearing his seatbelt. His arms wrapped around her. She screamed. Everything spun. A noise, crunching metal, shattering glass, then an icy sensation and the sharp smell of iron. Everything went black.
She woke up. The silence surrounding her was crueler than the impact she had just lived through. He was in front of her, motionless, his eyes empty. She tried to say his name, reached out toward him, but, as she moved, a sharp pain tore through her abdomen.
"AGGGGHHHH!!" The scream tore out of her. Blood mixed with water began to seep between her legs, an unmistakable sign of the worst, at the worst possible moment. Her abdomen clenched, and the contractions began. "N... NO... not here... NO...!" she screamed. The pain was so overwhelming that the world around her dissolved.
When she came to, white lights were flashing overhead. She was being rushed on a stretcher, surrounded by voices calling out orders; something about blood loss, dilation, risk of death. She tried to call for her husband, but then remembered the moment she had seen him after the crash. He was gone. He had left her alone. Her eyes flooded with tears, and her throat tried to form a scream, but it collapsed, and only wet, strangled coughs escaped, mingling with the tears running down her face. A muffled cry echoed somewhere down the hallway.
What followed was a blur. The pain was terrible; the baby was coming, even though there was still a month to go. She had lost too much blood. She tried to push, but nothing would come. She heard the word cesarean, shook her sweat-drenched head, and pushed again. Everything was erratic, blurry, and unbearable.
A loud cry rang out in the delivery room. Spe let her exhausted head fall back and gasped for breath, hollowed out by pain and effort. Then she fainted again.
That same night, Suzuka was notified of the accident. She asked Scarlet and Vodka to take her to the hospital, and the three of them were in the waiting room when the doctor came to give them an update.
"Are you related to Special Week?" he asked, reviewing the documents.
"We're her friends..." Suzuka paused. "Her family," she corrected herself. The doctor nodded.
"Special Week lost a significant amount of blood, but the delivery was successful, naturally. She's currently under observation and has already received the necessary transfusions."
Suzuka felt the air return to her lungs. Spe is alive. Scarlet, holding the sleeping Cesario in her arms, asked about Spe's husband. The doctor said there was nothing they could have done. Suzuka lowered her gaze and clenched her fists. The doctor then asked if any of them would like to see the newborn. Vodka placed a hand on Suzuka's shoulder and told her to go. She looked at her and nodded.
She followed the doctor to the room where a nurse had just finished cleaning the baby. She was a girl with brown hair and a white streak, just like her mother's.
"The birth came earlier than planned, but all the tests show she's well-developed. She's a healthy baby girl," the nurse said, placing the child in Suzuka's arms. Suzuka thought back to the last conversation she'd had with Spe before the accident.
"I hope Buena Vista is born healthy..." she had told her.
"Buena Vista..." Suzuka said, almost to herself.
"Buena Vista?" the nurse repeated.
"That's the name her mother wanted to give her. We still need to confirm it, but I'm certain that's it," she explained. The nurse wrote it down on her clipboard and led Suzuka to the room where Spe was resting. A wave of relief washed over her the moment she saw her. She was alive. Her face was pale and sweaty, her hair still damp, her skin marked with scrapes and bruises, one arm broken from the crash, but alive, after everything. Spe opened her eyes and met hers.
"Suzuka-san..." she said weakly.
"I'm here, Spe-chan." She moved closer. "Look, Buena Vista is here too. You did so well..." she said, tears in her eyes, gently turning the baby toward her. "Look, Buena, this is your mother..." She stopped when she saw Spe's expression.
Spe was staring at the child; small, fragile, and fierce at the same time. Her daughter. His daughter. The daughter of the man who had just died. The one he had shielded with his own body before the crash. She knew it was no one's fault, least of all the tiny girl before her, and yet something dark stirred inside her, something that wasnt either love or relief.
Rejection.
An inexplicable aversion that rose like a tide, driving her toward a rage she couldn't explain, as if the child were somehow responsible for everything she had lost.
"Suzuka-san..." Tears spilled from her eyes. "I don't want to see her... I... I hate her..." she said, her voice desperate and broken.
Suzuka said nothing. The nurse waited. Buena Vista began to cry loudly, stubbornly, remarkable for a child born a month too soon. The crying seemed to reach for her mother, to demand contact, warmth, presence. Suzuka steadied herself and drew the baby closer.
"I'll take care of her until you're better. Don't worry," she said gently. Spe turned her face away, caught between shame and gratitude.
"Forgive me, Suzuka..." She thought of the trainer who would never again set a time for her, and her heart broke completely. She wept in silence, hiccuping with grief. Suzuka stood beside her, holding Buena Vista, both mother and daughter crying for a life they desperately wanted to hold onto.
***
In the waiting room, Cesario woke up. She reached out and touched Scarlet curiously.
"Auntie," she said. Her blue hair and white streak shifted softly as she tilted her head. "Dad? Mom?" she asked. Scarlet pulled her into a tight hug.
"Mom went to get your little sister," she said sweetly. "And Dad went on a trip." She did her best not to fall apart, holding onto her smile. Cesario, perceptive and thoughtful for her age, couldn't quite grasp that her aunt was hiding something, but she sensed that things were not as they should be. She hugged Scarlet back as best she could, as if trying to offer comfort. At that small gesture, Scarlet's tears finally slipped free.
"Cesario..." She rested her chin on the little girl's head.
***
Two days later, Spe was discharged. Vodka pushed her wheelchair toward the hospital entrance, where Scarlet stood waiting with Cesario, and Suzuka stood with Buena Vista in her arms. The moment Spe saw Cesario, she began to cry. The little girl broke free from Scarlet and ran to her.
"Mommy!" she cried, throwing her arms around her. Spe felt the warmth her daughter's small body lit in her heart, a warmth that gave her strength, something like hope.
"My little girl..." She held her back tightly. Suzuka slowly stepped closer with Buena Vista, but as she did, she caught the expression on Spe's face, one she had never seen there before.
"No..." Spe whispered. "No... I can't..." She looked away again, ashamed. Suzuka exhaled quietly and looked down at Buena Vista, sleeping in her arms.
"Your mom is very strong," she said softly. "She's just hurting right now. But she'll give you a really big hug soon." Her voice carried more sadness than she let show.
Spe heard her and said nothing. Neither did Scarlet or Vodka. Then, after a long moment, Spe spoke.
"I hope so..." she said quietly. "I really hope so, Suzuka-san..." She pulled Cesario closer. She knew she should love her daughter. She just couldn't understand why something inside her refused.
"Let's go home so you can rest," Scarlet said.
"Thank you," Spe replied, still holding Cesario. Together, she and her friends passed through the hospital door and disappeared.
Spe had been through so much in so little time, and Suzuka understood that. She held onto hope in her heart, hope that her friend would one day be able to hold her daughter. But if that day was still far away, or if it never came at all...
She would be there. Always.