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“Do you believe in soulmates, Iwa-chan?”
The question leaves Oikawa’s lips in the softest of voices, barely above a whisper, and for a brief moment Hajime doesn’t offer him any kind of reply, wondering if he’s heard right or if he’s just imagined Oikawa’s question.
They’ve been quietly watching the sunset, sitting side by side in two plastic chairs on the roofs of their apartment building and enjoying a well-deserved break after two weeks going utterly crazy with finals and projects at college.
The setting sun paints the sky a strong orange color, the city traffic is loud and busy as usual, and the streets are crowded as hell with people going home after a long day of work. None of that really matters to Hajime right now, though, because after two weeks of madness he can finally breathe again. And rest. And, really, just not having to worry about any more exams or due projects is more than awesome, thank you very much.
“Iwa-chan.”
“Oh yeah, Oikawa asked him a question. Right.
Hajime’s eyes leave the horizon to face his best friend and he finds out Oikawa’s already watching him, head slightly tilted to the side in waiting.
“What was the question again?” Hajime asks and he has to hold back a smile when he sees Oikawa roll his eyes petulantly – probably outraged by the fact that Hajime hadn’t been paying attention to him at all.
“Do you believe in soulmates?” Oikawa repeats, louder and fiercer this time.
‘Do I?’ Is the first thing that comes to Hajime’s head.
He’s never given the matter much thought, really. He knows a good deal of people believe in this kind of thing, in the idea of having someone out there that complements them – are their other half –, and, sure, Hajime admits it’s a nice thing to believe in, but this has never been a concern of his; he’s always been too practical and too much of a realist to busy himself with such things.
But this is exactly the type of thing that Oikawa would care about.
“I don’t know,” Hajime finally says, resting against the backrest of his plastic chair and crossing his arms in front of his chest, brow furrowing a bit as he ponders about what he should tell Oikawa. He can’t see why he should lie about it, so he chooses not to. “Never really thought about it, to be honest. It’s not really my thing, I guess.”
The disappointment that flashes in Oikawa’s chocolate eyes is so brief that any normal person would’ve missed it, but Hajime is not just a normal person, at least not when it comes to reading Oikawa; Hajime has known him for over fifteen years now, has spent endless hours learning every aspect of Oikawa’s personality, every one of his moods and all of his flaws and his greatest points as well, so even that subtle change speaks volumes to him.
The unusual, heavy silence that follows Hajime’s answer and the slight frown maring Oikawa’s usually smooth forehead just confirm his suspicions. Oikawa had been waiting for a different answer, it seems, and he was not satisfied with the one he got.
“You believe it,” Hajime says, not really a question because he just knows he’s right. Not a hint of doubt in his voice.
Because of course Oikawa, of all people, would believe in soulmates. Despite all the flirting he’s done in his life, despite the narcissism and deceptive detachment from anything that doesn’t revolve around him, deep down, Hajime knows for a fact that Oikawa is nothing short of a hopeless romantic.
Hajime knows Oikawa is a sucker for the lovey-dovey shit his best friend finds in those awful rom-coms he’s addicted to, knows Oikawa loves being spoiled by those who are close to him and loves spoiling his loved ones just as much, knows he loves a good pampering and small thoughtful gestures. Honestly, Oikawa is overall such a huge fucking sap, plain and simple, that Hajime shouldn’t be that surprised to learn that the idiot does believe in all this mushy crap, but he actually is.
Damn it, he should’ve seen that one coming, shouldn’t he?
“Well, excuse me,” Oikawa scoffs, displeased, nose high in the air as he glares daggers at Hajime. “This might be shocking for you, Iwa-chan, but some people like to believe in nice things. Not everyone is a pessimist like yourself.”
That reply is enough to get a snort out of Hajime. He opens his mouth to retort, a snarky remark ready on the tip of his tongue, but Oikawa doesn’t give him the chance to do so. Oikawa’s face softens then, brown eyes going gentler and the frown slipping off his face as he smiles genuinely at Hajime for the first time since they sat down to watch the sunset together and, out of a sudden, Hajime’s world is turned upside down.
“And besides,” Oikawa continues, voice even, smooth, almost a caress. “It’s hard for me not to believe it when it feels like I met mine when I was six.”
Hajime’s heart stutters and almost stops inside his chest once his brain catches up with the meaning behind Oikawa’s words. His chest tightens, his mouth goes dry, and he can feel his face getting suspiciously warmer than it should, but he doesn’t say anything.
Better yet, he can’t say anything. Not when Oikawa is talking to him and looking at him like that; expression soft and open, honest, void of fakes smiles and without any trace of his usual smugness. Because Iwaizumi Hajime has seen a lot of beautiful things in his twenty-two years of life, but, to this day, nothing compares to the beauty that is Oikawa Tooru when he takes off his cocky, arrogant mask and just shows his true self. It’s a side Oikawa doesn’t show often, this tender, more vulnerable side, and Hajime can’t help but feel privileged to be one of the few people who are allowed to witness it.
“Ooh, did I render Iwa-chan speechless?”
Oikawa’s tone is teasing and light, but there’s also a hint of expectation there that Hajime doesn’t miss –a touch of that same old insecurity that Oikawa’s been carrying since childhood and that he has learnt to hide well behind those fake grins he’s always flashing; the ones that fool everyone but have yet to work on Hajime too.
Hajime hates that insecurity like he’s hated very few things in his life so, instead of denying everything as he usually does, he smiles warmly at Oikawa and humors him. Because even if Hajime tends to hold back a great deal of the good things he thinks about Oikawa to avoid inflating the guy’s (already huge) ego, there’s no way in hell he’s not gonna do everything in his power to keep any kind of self-doubt out of Oikawa’s overthinking brain. He loves that asshole too much not to.
“Yeah, you kinda did,” Hajime laughs, eyes not leaving Oikawa’s figure for a second as the words leave his mouth.
That’s enough to catch Oikawa by surprise and it’s his turn to be rendered speechless when Hajime, slowly and never breaking eye contact, reaches for his hand and intertwines their fingers with care.
“But you know what, Shittykawa?” Hajime goes on, and there’s not a single hint of venom in his voice, only fondness. “When you put things in that perspective, I guess having a soulmate wouldn’t be so bad, after all. Especially since we found each other so early, you know. It must mean something.”
It takes exactly three seconds for Oikawa to understand what Hajime is trying to tell him and, when he does, the most honest and beautiful smile spreads over his lips, eyes sparkling with pure happiness.
And as Hajime stares at Oikawa like that, all genuine smile, brown wanes of hair swishing in the breeze blowing on the roof and overall glowing in the sunset light, he comes to the realization that he really means what he’s just said; that having a soulmate –having Oikawa as a soulmate– wouldn’t be so bad. Not if it meant that Oikawa would keep looking at Hajime that way; all warm and with so much love Hajime’s heart almost can’t handle it.
“Ah, Iwa-chan, I didn’t know you were secretly a romantic,” Oikawa says, squeezing Hajime’s hand and leaning to rest his head against Hajime’s shoulder.
And if Hajime hears the small sniff that comes from Oikawa, he’s feeling selfless enough to just pretend he doesn’t.
“Shut up, Oikawa,” he says instead, bringing their joined hands closer and planting a light kiss on the back of Oikawa’s hand just for good measure.
No, having a soulmate wouldn’t be that bad at all.