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The wooden counter he's laying on his too cold. The fact that he can tell it is means he's not drunk enough.
How long had he been in here? hours? days? who knows. who cares. the fact that he can even think about that means he is not drunk enough.
he is never truly drunk enough. he always ends up remembering. remembering the visions, the meanings, the doom. he doesn't want to remember but he's forced to he's bound to. he's cursed to.
this power, only written about in those history books he was forced to read as a child, is a curse. Its a curse on his life on his soul on his body every waking moment is misery. maybe he should go to the whore house? no he's certainly not drunk enough for that.
he hears the barkeep place a new jug next to his head. he lifts his head slowly, his hands moving to grasp the large cup with both of his hands and raises it to his lips and quickly chugs it all down. its bitter and gross. his head slams back down onto the counter and the jug falls to the ground. he can feel liquid running down his chin, down his chest. his eyes begin to droop and he feels that familiar dread fill his stomach. he does not want to sleep because he does not want to dream what if he see's something, anything. he does not want it.
yet he cannot fight it, the drowsiness takes over his body like a plague seeps into ones soul. so he sleeps.
he hasn't had a dream like this since he was a young young boy. back then he had dreamed of a woman, the most beautiful women he had ever seen. she and him were together in a comfy cozy home he did not recognize. or at least that is how he wanted to interpret it. his chest had filled with a warmth he had never experienced before. he remembers waking up with his chest pounding but a smile on his face. he hadn't had a happy dream since then. he believed he had gone mad and made up some grand paradise future for himself and quickly rid himself of that memory.
but for the first time in many years he finds himself dreaming of the same face. its the very same woman. shes as gorgeous as the day he first saw her. this time she is at the place he recognizes, summerhall, and she is pressing a dragon egg against her stomach. his signet ring lays on her ring finger. shes grinning with the brightest most beautiful smile he had ever seen.
his eyes burn as he forces them open. the barkeep gives him an odd look as he sits up quickly, his body sways side to side as he tries to ground himself back in reality for the first time in years.
he knows what it means. the woman is to be his wife and to bear his child. maybe the child's egg will hatch? no he is thinking too hard about it, he should try to focus on what he knows to be true. she had the most pleasant smile on her face, the rush of happiness he felt seeing seeing it left him feeling rather strange.
"would you like another drink?"
the barkeep is speaking to him, clearly put off by how odd the prince was acting. he opens his mouth, his throat his hoarse and dry.
"water."
if he was looking at the barkeeps face he would have seen the look of shock and horror given to him. he had never asked for water, if he needed water he would just chug down more wine until he didn't need it anymore. he was staring off into space, what was he to do if he ever saw this woman, go up to her and proclaim her to be his wife? that would be ridiculous. he did not even know if she was of right birth, what if she was a whore from the house maybe he should go there later today to check it out.
he barely registers the scratching of the stool near him scrapping along the ground as some sits down. he takes a small sip of the water placed in front of him.
"whatever's cheapest." the woman's voice is unfamiliar to him so he pays it no mind. he hears the barkeep grunt and the sloshing around of liquid filling into a cup but his gaze stayed fixed on the wall in front of him. what was he going to do? maybe he should go on some wild goose hunt to find her, it could be a good excuse to get him away from home for awhile. he should just leave it alone. he has never sought out his dreams before, he was definitely not going to start with this one.
he groans and lets his head fall back on the table. his hands come up to cradle his head to try and soothe the aching of his head.
what he does not expect is to hear a what was possibly the rudest scoff he had ever heard in his whole life followed quickly with a, "this is unbelievable."
was she talking to him? a scowl grows on his face, he's not in the mood to talk to anyone especially not some rude woman. he slowly tilts his head towards her until one of his eyes peeks out from his arm. he lets out the loudest gasp, standing up so quick the stool he had been sitting on goes flying backwards. he steps as far away from her as he can, his heart pounding in his chest as he blinks his dry eyes trying to make sense of what he was seeing.
it was her. the woman from his dreams sitting on the bar stool of some shitty bar with the nastiest glare on her face directed right towards him.
"oh so you do know what i look like."
his ears could barely register what you were saying he was still too shocked you were actually there in person since he was just dreaming about you. his breath was short as his brain tried to catch up with the sight in front of him.
"….what?"
a loud slam filled the air as she slammed the now empty jug on the counter and stood up. "you are the worst man in all of westeros. i have been trying to call on you and i sit through these stupid marriage meets so i can finally meet my supposed betrothed and now i find him covered in his own spit and shit in some shitty-"
"i dreamed of you."
there's an odd silence that fills the air. the scowl she's had this whole time falls for a moment. just a moment but he almost smiles at the sight before it twists back up again.
"fuck off."
she turns quickly, her hand on the table for a moment where he can hear the clinking of metal coins before she storms out without another word. he stands motionless as he rethinks the entire conversation.
marriage? husband?
he can vaguely recall his father summoning him and telling him of some marriage alliance with a girl from the free cities. that was about him? maekar had probably said it was but he was barely paying any attention. he was asked to attend a couple meetings in the same conversation. he can barely believe it.
he hisses and grips his head. its pounding louder than his heart his.
he's let himself get too sober. he's not drunk enough.
—
it had taken you at least a moon cycle to get to kings landing. you had now been in kings landing for yet another moon cycle.
you had not seen the man you were promised to a single time. it was humiliating. you had never been so humiliated in your whole life. you would sit during your marriage talks and stare at the empty seat a rage burning deep inside your stomach. you had asked for him, requested his presence more times than you can remember and not once had he shown himself.
you finally had enough and decided to go search for him on your own. it was rather easy with enough coin you found out where he regularly frequents and simply watched him for awhile. now that you had finally seen him you were so embarrassed you had even been calling on him at all. he was a wreck through and through. you had heard things, that he was a drunk who spent all his time drinking, a man whore who spent all his time in a whore house. both seemed to be completely true, you were sick to your stomach.
when you saw your father again you were going to kill him. was he purposefully trying to piss you off? was it because you had rejected the proposal from that old slave master from volantis? you remember he was very unhappy about that. you were going to kill him.
when you got back to the palace you stormed into the library and sat against the window. you knew if you went to your room your mother would likely be there waiting for you, wanting to talk about about the wedding and the marriage.
you were so frustrated you ripped the cloak you were wearing off and tossed it far away from you.
"you should watch where you throw things."
the voice is meek but mighty. your head turns to look and immediately stand up in horror.
"prince aegon i am so sorry please forgive me."
you lowed yourself to a deep bow. the cloak had just barely missed him, pooled up in a ball right next to where he was sitting. you didn't dare raise your head until you hear him laugh.
"its fine. it would have been funnier if it hit me."
you and aegon had formed a sort of weird friendship. neither of you had anyone in the palace you got along with, you being a foreigner with only your mother and two maids you had no other connections out here. then there was aegon who had his brother he was closest with taken away from him, he cant connect with his oldest brother who 'lives in his own world,' and the second oldest who he stays away from at all costs. his sisters were no better he tended to just stick to himself most of the time.
aegon had decided he liked you after you cursed aerion under your breath after he made an off comment about aegon in front of you. now the young prince liked to hang around you whenever he saw you and aerion tended to stay away.
so the two of you stuck together, he requested to eat meals with you basically every day and since your mother couldn't dare refuse a request of the prince he always ate with you. whenever he wasn't in lessons he would find you where ever you happened to be and would spend the day together out with you.
people thought it was strange. your mother especially. you had almost slapped her after she tried to suggest you married him instead. he was nice and cute when he wasn't trying to deliberately piss you off, he also was the only person who had been even remotely friendly towards you so you two decided to stick together.
you glare at the young boy who shrugged before going back to his book. you dragged your body over to him and sat down on a free cushion next to him.
"your brother is awful."
"which one?"
"my betrothed."
"he's not that bad."
"he's awful."
"you can't come up with a different word?"
"i would hit you if i could."
he giggles, hiding his face in his book before he glances at you, his eyes more serious than before. his tone lost his usual sass as his eyes filled with worry.
"did he do something?"
you shook your head and he immediately relaxed, you ignore quiet sigh of relief he lets out from what he's alluded to you can imagine he probably thought the worst even if it was the better brother.
"i just cant believe hes a drunk slob."
"you already knew that."
"i know! i just can't believe i saw it with my own two eyes."
he rolls his eyes as you bang your head against the table. this was the worst. you would be doomed to a life of misery with a whore for a husband. you never thought this would be a marriage of love maybe one of mutual respect but that seemed to be too much to hope for now that you knew what you did.
your voice is muffled as you speak again, not even bothering to lift up your head.
"i mean what nerve he has. the first thing he says to me is that he dreams of me. what does that even mean?"
there's a loud slam as aegon shuts the book he had been pretending to read as he shakes you urgently. he tells you to sit up with an urgency in his voice you had never heard before. you glare at him as do as he asked. the look on his face makes you nervous.
"what did you just say?"
"i said he has some nerve."
"no the thing after that!"
you face twists in confusion as he seems like what you had just said is the most important thing in all of the seven kingdoms. he had grabbed your arms and was leaning in close to you, eager to hear the words that would escape your mouth. he had never looked more like the young boy he was than he did right this second. his eyes shined with that childlike wonder. you had almost forgotten the boy was not even ten yet.
"he said he dreams of me?"
"yes that part! did he say anything else?"
"i stormed out before he could."
aegon deflates, letting go of you as he sighs. he places a hand on his forehead like a father disappointed in his son would. despite all this he has a big grin on his face. if he wasn't so cute and if he wasn't a prince you would slap him.
"what has gotten into you?"
"all my brothers dreams come true."
he stands up leaving you lost as he looks along the big wall of books, searching for something. he ends up having to jump up to pick a book off the shelf before he brings it back over to you. the book is rather old, it looks heavy you're shocked he can even pick it up.
"have you ever read the story of the doom of valyria?"
"do you think me stupid?"
he rolls his eyes, his mouth opening to say something in retort but he closes his mouth, flipping through the book until he lands on the page he's looking for.
"well then you must know of daenys."
of course you know of her. daenys. the one who foresaw the destruction of valyria and got the targaryen family out of valyria to westeros where they survived. your father called her a madwoman who simply had a 'woman's temper tantrum' and forced her father to relocate after some 'silly dream.' your father hates the targaryen's but it is too beneficial of a marriage for him to refuse and for you, a third daughter with an older sister and an older brother who were already married your mother called it a stroke of luck.
"the one who predicted the doom yes of course."
"she did not predict it. she knew it was going to happen. she saw it. she dreamt it. just like my brother has dreamt of you."
you did not like the sound of this in the slightest. did that mean you were going to do something bad? did the targaryen's only dream of doom? were you going to bring doom? no. you were just a normal girl, maybe you had a poor temper but did that mean you would bring terror?
"did he point a knife at you?"
"no."
"then it couldn't have been a bad dream."
there's a silence in the air. what were you even supposed to say to that. all this talk of dragon dreams, doom, and the future made your head spin. what had your father gotten you into? maybe you should try to convince them to send you back so you never have to think about any of this ever again.
"my prince."
the both of you turn to see a servant, there's too many of them too many names to remember but you certainly had seen him before, he bows his head before he speaks again.
"its time for your evening bath sir."
aegon groans but stands dutifully. he wipes his hands on the front of his cloak before he goes to put back his books.
"where will the young prince be taking his dinner?"
"with the lady of course she already invited me."
you certainly did not but you did not refuse. you smile at the servant who bows back at you before leading aegon out the room, you wave at his retreating form only once he is out of view do you finally let the smile fall and hit your head on the table.
this whole thing was turning into a bigger mess than you had ever planned it to be. maybe you should not have sought him out and just let nature take its course. the pit in your stomach grew large as you remembered the look on the eldest son of maekar's face. it was not anger or sadness. it was shock, disbelief. worst of all, there was warmth.
—
the chair is empty once again and for the first time this whole time you have been in kings landing you have never been more thankful for it.
you didn't even hear whatever excuse maekar tried to give this time. you simply smiled and let your mother control the conversation like you usually did. these talks bored you, if you were simply just going to sit here you wondered why you even be invited at all. maybe it was the proper lady like thing to simply sit around.
what you did not expect is for the door to open and for footsteps to approach the table.
"daeron!"
the three of you stand and stare. maekar seemed the most shocked out of you all, exclaiming his name like he was seeing a ghost.
"sorry I'm late."
he offers no excuse, simply bows for a moment before standing to his full height. his eyes immediately locking onto you, not looking away for a single second. he had cleaned up rather well after the mess you had seen him in before. his hair was neat, his outfit was red it stood out remarkably from the clothes the three of you were wearing. he swayed where he stood and his eyes were a little red that told you he was not completely sober. he was still sober enough to come. it was far too early for him to even be awake yet based on what you knew. what in the hells was he doing here?
maekar introduces him, forcing a smile on his face as he grabs daeron and leads him towards the table where you and your mother stood. you did not want him to come anywhere near you. that same pit of doom returning to your stomach. what could he possibly have dreamed about? you need to know but you would also rather die before finding out.
you step towards him to greet him. your mother tells him your name and he whispers it lightly as if hes trying it out on his tongue. you dip into a deep bow. as much as he might irritate you he is a prince nonetheless. when you stand up you expect that to be that, you move to go back to your seat before his wordless actions stop you.
he holds out a singular hand out to you, the palm up. you stare at it for a moment confused before you realize he wants you to give him your hand. your hand twitches as you lift it up. you should slap his hand away, what his he grabs your hand and calls for the guards for your arrest then you are public ally hung in the street for being a terror?
you place your palm in his as a deep breath fills your lungs. your free hand clenches at your side as you try to come up with what he could possibly want.
he slowly drops to rest on one knee, his eyes still locked onto your face as he brings your hand towards him. his lips press against the back of your hand, they're chapped and hard but there's something soft in the way he lets his lips linger for a moment too long, the way an exhale tickles against your skin. his head had dropped so his forehead was practically pressed against your forearm. your breath his caught in your chest, it feels like you heart has suddenly stopped pounding.
after what feels like a lifetime stuck in that singular moment he finally looks up.
"my lady."
you gulp. your mouth suddenly feels rather dry. had it been dry this whole time? your eyes stay locked as he stands, your hand still in his. the moment lingers for far too long before he slips his hand out of yours. your fingers twitch as if they miss the warmth, its unintentional.
it felt like there was a fire between the two of you. it burned. it was so warm. your chest had begun to pound in a way it had never before. there was something about the way he was looking at you. the intensity of his stare burned into you like he was trying to see beyond your flesh and peek into your soul.
as he's finally stood all the way up you take a large step back and manage to rip your eyes away from him, staring down at your hands which you had cupped to lay in front of you. the hand he had touched was burning. you fought the urge to clench your hands together in the hopes it will hide how affected you are by him. why were you acting this way? was it because you knew you were in his future one way or another? there was something about him. something you wished to stay away from.
he greeted your mother too. albeit much faster than he had greeted you, he barely had bowed his head and despite the fact he lifted her hand his lips had not even grazed the back of it before he dropped it back down and turned back towards you.
"i have something for you my lady."
'i do not want it.' you bite your tongue. you watch as he reaches into his pocket and presents you want had to be the most beautiful clip you had ever seen. it was an intricate golden flower design. the flower's were made out of some sort of pink crystal. it was beautiful.
"a matching necklace and earrings will be done soon. this was all i could have prepared for today i apologize."
your mother cups her heart against her chest like this was the most romantic thing in the whole world while maekar stared at his son like he had grown a second head. you reach out to grab the clip from him and once your hand his close enough his fingers reach to graze against your hand as you grab it. even though you pull your hand away as quickly as possible it does not feel quick enough. your hand continues to burn.
"this is very kind. thank you."
you don't dare look up at him, keeping your eyes firmly on the clip as you can still feel his eyes on you. maekar grants you a blessing as he insists we all sit down and continue the meeting. your mother catches daeron up to speed. you were to get married come the summer, which was in a fair few moon cycles from now as winter had just begun. the two of you would return to summerhall along with the rest of his family within the next cycle or so, only truly having come so you could receive the kings approval and for your mother to do some courtly things you had no clue about.
your mother will be returning back to lys to get your side of the family prepared for the wedding. she will return a good while before the wedding to help you prepare, bringing your family with her. you would make periodic trips back to lys to meet with your family and conduct business. you would get married in the one of the septs in the city..
quite frankly you had stopped paying attention at some point, you had heard this information countless times now that you could recite it word for word. the only reason you had even been listening at this point is to try and distract yourself from the fact he is still looking at you.
he didn't contribute much to the meeting. simply agreeing with what his father said before drinking from a flask and continuing to stare at you. he should go rot in a hole and die. fall down a well. why was he terrorizing you like this? why was it bothering you so much.
you instead chose to admire the clip he had given you. it was very nice, you tried to imagine how it would look with the matching necklace and earrings he was going to gift you and found a light smile resting on your face. it would look beautiful. the surface is cold as you run your finger tips along it. you wonder what it's made of, where it was made. did he have this custom made? no that wasn't possible you said seen him yesterday mid afternoon and it was now early morning there was no time.
you raise your head from your lap and smile at your mother before you dare to look across from you.
he's still staring.
you had never actually gotten take take a good look at him. he was very handsome, he looked exactly how you imagined a westeros prince to look. sure he did not bare the targaryen white hair but if anything you preferred him that way. it reminded you more of home strangely. he had noticeable stubble on his face but that many women in back home would definitely find repulsive but if anything you think it makes him more handsome. he has an odd expression on his face one you're not able to make out. is he happy? upset? confused? you don't know.
the meeting both flies by and feels like it goes on forever until you are dismissed. you remain in the room until maekar leaves, your mother had said it would be rude to leave before him. your mother tells you she has other affairs to attend to and she'll see you later until its just you are your betrothed.
"well, good day my prince."
you bow your head and swiftly move to leave the room not wanting to spend a single second more in his presence. the swift footsteps that follow after you tell you its not going to be easy to lose him. a familiar scowl twists off your usual put together expression.
"can i join you my lady?"
"i have prior plans my prince good day."
"what plans?"
"nothing you should be concerned with my prince."
"you are to be my wife it should be my concern."
you freeze in the hallway. his steps cease as well. he's like a well trained dog. you spin around to face him. he has an small smile on his face. you are so tired of this of him.
"may i ask you a question?"
"you may."
"what are you doing my prince?"
he laughs. he actually laughs at your question. you find yourself consumed with the need to slap him or spit on him or do anything to get rid of that delightful sight on his face.
"you were calling on me before and now i am answering. i simply wish to spend some time with you."
he knew you were calling on him and now he wants to answer what a dick.
you force your jaw from opening, your mouth ready to spit some ridiculous retort back at him. what nonsense was he talking about. he had spent a whole month probably not even thinking about you and suddenly he meets you once where you said somethings to him you should not have said and now he wants to spend time with you. there is something terribly wrong with him.
was the dream a good thing then? if he's trying to seek you out and wishes to see you that must mean it is a good thing. or maybe he's just playing the long game and he's trying to catch you in some nefarious act. either way looking at him pisses you off.
you swallow down what you truly wish to say and dip into a bow.
"i apologize my prince but i have prior plans. good day"
you spin around and continue on your way as if you had not even spoken to him before you do something to his pretty face. his footsteps trail after you despite your deceleration.
"you continuing to say good day is not going to make me go away my lady."
your eye twitches. you don't even dignify him with a response as you hurry along you way. you do actually have plans despite what he may think. you're probably already late. not that you have a set time for your meeting but it would be better for you to hurry there in case he gets swept up by someone else.
the library is a far too familiar sight at this point in your visit. the maesters and others who linger about look at you in shock, not necessarily directed at you but the dog trailing behind you. your head bows in a greeting as you continue to walk along until you stumble into your usual meeting area.
the young prince smiles upon hearing you say his name, looking up from his textbook his face falls in shock.
"brother?"
"you would rather spend the day with my nine year old brother than with me?"
you ignore him sitting down in your usual spot with aegon with a smile on your face.
"can you get him to leave?"
you can see aegon fight a laugh from his throat as he looks between the two of you. you had leaned closer to aegon to whisper to him while daeron remained standing, looking almost bewildered at the sight before him. aegon, who was no help, simply shrugged with a smug look. you wish you could hit him.
"what are you two even doing?"
you take one of the textbooks from the table and flip it open, not even glancing in daeron's direction.
"he is currently studying the free cities. who could be a better tutor than i?"
"are we actually going to study?"
you shoot aegon a very pointed look and he shuts his mouth. it was a good excuse to spend the day locked up in the library with aegon. he tended to have a secluded part all to himself so you two would usually just sit and chat until someone came to fetch him. but since daeron was here you might actually need to teach him some stuff.
you open up a map and push it towards aegon.
"point to me where every free city is on the map and name them."
aegon gave you a hopeless expression. he did not want to study, at least not about the free cities. he liked to spend his time reading about knights and war history. you would tell him stories about the 'knights' you have back at home and he would stare at you with that starry eyed look, hooked on to each and every single word you said. these stories were few and far in between however and he would get very mad when you said you had none to tell. truthfully it took you awhile to remember those stories in which it was appropriate to tell someone his age, the people of the free cities can get very violent.
he stared at you for a minute as if hes trying to get you to take it back but you hold your ground despite how cute he looked. his eyes trail to his older brother for a moment in a silent glare before he looks down at the map. the older brother in question still stood with his arms crossed watching you.
its only for a moment. only until he leaves, until he gets bored aegon I'm sorry. he can't hear your thoughts of course but you stare so hard at him trying to push the message into his mind.
he points an uncertain finger at a spot on the map.
"volantis?"
"not even close."
aegon huffs, his lips poking out into a pout as he stares hard into the map. as he's lost in thought you stupidly let your eyes wander to the older prince. he was looking at you. as he seemed to always be at this point. you suddenly found it a little harder to breath. there was something so intense about his gaze. it burned. maybe it was just a targaryen trait.
his eyes were so dark. his hair was so yellow. it was strange to think that if the two of you stood side by side you would look much more targaryen than he does. the purple eyes and white hair were a regular sight for you, many of the other noble ladies and men sharing similar features, but here many of them did not even have white hair. you wonder if he likes the way he looks, maybe there's something comforting about it.
"lys?"
you rip your gaze away from him and look back to aegon who's still staring hard at the map. you shake yourself before you lean over to glance at where his finger laid.
"you're right."
"don't sound so shocked."
daeron much to both you and aegons dismay chooses this moment to make himself comfortable sitting next to you, pulling out a flask from his person before sipping on it. you shoot aegon an apologetic look. looks like the two of you would actually be studying after all. in the hopes of saving aegon some headache and saving you from having to sit there all day you change the task.
"tell me everything you know about lys."
"its where you're from."
you frown at the grin he shoots you. daeron must think you are the worst tutor in all of westeros.
"do you know anything else?"
he sits quiet for a moment before shrugging. why did you even ask. the boy knows nothing but knight and swords.
"well then lets go even further back then. following the doom of valyria came the century of blood."
for the next couple hours you beat information about the century of blood and the founding of lys. aegon looked miserable as he tried to remember everything you were saying as you would periodically ask him questions about something you had told him earlier.
and daeron sat there the whole time. sometimes he would stare out the window or he would stare at his flask before he took a long chug out of it but most of the time he would be staring at you.
you tried your best to ignore him but sometimes you looked over while aegon was writing something and look back at him. you almost wanted to say something to him, the silence between you two was not awkward but it was strange. he seemed like had no interest in even starting a conversation despite his staring. so you decided to do it for him.
"can i ask you something my prince?"
you had kept your voice low in order to try not to distract aegon from the task you had just given him, listing all the free cities and what type of government they had, but the young boy still looked up anyway.
"of course my lady."
"when you said you dream of me…" your throat clogs up at the sight of him flinching at the mention of dreams. you muster your courage to push on and the words manage to escape your throat. "what did you mean by that?"
"oh i want to know too."
"focus on your work."
aegon grumbles as he looks back down at his paper but its not subtle the way he looks back up and glances between the two of you.
"you know of the curse then."
curse. its an odd word to use. many people would call it a gift. he was blessed by the gods your mother would likely say. a curse is a terrible thing. a burden. you don't have enough time to dwell on it.
"you were at summerhall wearing my signet ring. you were holding a dragon egg."
you had almost expected him to dodge the question but he answered it without even a second thought, as if it had already been on his mind. he had a serene look on his face like the idea didn't bother him at all.
his eyes widen as the huge sigh of relief you let out. you felt a whole lot of pressure exit your body. you laugh actually, covering your mouth as you try to keep it down.
"sorry sorry gods im so relieved. i had thought i would do something horrid."
daeron watches you fully turn to face him, his heart pounds out of his chest as you take your hand away from your mouth a give him a huge grin. just like the one from his dreams.
"im so glad."
he was done for. you were going to ruin him.
he watches your face fall as it seems like something occurs to you and it instead turns into a look of annoyance and you look away from him. he feels a rush of joy flow through his body. you are just as beautiful as he dreamed you.
"is something wrong my lady?"
"do not think you have my favor my prince you are still…. not up to standard."
his smile only grew. his hands clenched to press down the pure need to grab you to hold you. he's never felt like this before. he had never felt such comfort such warmth he wanted to cling to it desperately like a mad man. he did not care if he seemed crazy, maybe he had actually gone mad. but he needed to cling to this feeling even if it killed him. if this was some foolish trick the gods were playing on him then he would happily fall into their grasp. he was so desperate for anything to take him out of his misery he clung to you put of desperation.
"then i look forward to trying to gain it my lady."