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Hong was five years old when he moved to Bangkok. He hadn’t made any friends yet, mostly because he hadn’t bothered to look for any.
He had friends back home.
He had a life back home.
He wanted to go back home.
He was tucked into the branches of a tree near the front gate like he was on lockout. With one leg dangling and the other tucked against his chest, he tried to drown out the city with an English song thumping through his headphones. He closed his eyes, pretending he was anywhere else until the world began to shake.
His hands clamped down onto the bark as he glared down. Two boys stood at the base of the trunk, looking up with unsettling amounts of energy.
“What is wrong with you? I could fall!”
“I’d catch you,” the brunette with big eyes grinned, “Come play with us.”
“I don’t want to.”
The shorter one pouted, “But… aren’t you bored all by yourself?”
Hong wanted to say no. He wanted to be stubborn, but the silence of the house behind him was starting to feel heavy.
Okay, he was a little bored.
“I’m Nut. This is William,” the brunette greeted, his smile bright. “Come on. Please?”
Something about that smile felt like a trap. The kind of trap that led to scraped knees and trouble, but Hong found himself sliding his headphones down anyway. He descended slowly, his sneakers hitting the dirt right in front of Nut. Up close, Nut was even louder; his presence felt like the start of something new.
Hong frowned at him, trying to hide the way his face felt warm from the exertion of climbing down, “You’re already annoying.”
“Oh, I get worse,” Nut promised, his grin only growing wider.
Despite himself, the corners of Hong’s lips lifted in a small smile. He didn’t know it yet, but that annoying grin was about to become his first friend in Bangkok.
♡
Five years passed, and Nut still hadn’t stopped being annoying. The only thing that had changed was that the annoyance had somehow morphed into a constant in Hong’s life.
They were ten now, sprawled out on the floor of Nut’s bedroom with a half-finished LEGO set between them and a fan whittling overhead to fight the Bangkok humidity. William had extra classes, and the two others in their group, Lego and Tui, had gotten in trouble in their class and were in detention, leaving Nut and Hong to their own devices. Hong was leaning over the instruction manual, his brows furrowed in that intense way he had when he was trying to solve a problem.
Nut wasn’t looking at the manual, though.
He was looking at Hong.
He noticed the way Hong’s dark hair fell over his eyes, the same eyes that used to glare at him from the tree branch, but now looked at him with kindness and friendship and something too deep that Nut wasn’t sure he knew the word for. He noticed the small mole below Hong’s ear and the way he chewed his bottom lip when he was thinking.
“Nut? You have the blue piece?” Hong asked, holding out his hand without looking up.
Nut didn’t move. He was stuck on the way the sunlight from the window caught the edge of Hong’s profile. It caused a strange feeling to flutter in his stomach. It wasn’t the ‘I want to play tag’ feeling, either.
It was heavier.
Warmer.
“Nut?” Hong looked up, a look of confusion on his face, “You okay? Your face is red?”
“It’s just hot,” Nut blurted out, his voice a pitch too high. He scrambled to find the piece, his fingers suddenly feeling like they belonged to someone else.
Hong reached out, his hand brushing against Nut’s as he took the piece. It was a tiny, accidental contact. It was a touch they had a thousand times before while wrestling or climbing trees, but this time, it felt like an electric shock. Nut pulled his hand back as if he’d been burned, his heart beating too fast.
“You’re being weird,” Hong said, a knowing smile tugging on his lips, “Are you finally getting worse as you promised me all those years ago?”
Nut looked at Hong–really looked at him.
And he realized the worst he promised wasn’t being annoying anymore.
It was this.
This terrifying, dizzying realization that he didn’t just want to play with Hong.
He wanted to be near him.
Always.
“Maybe,” Nut whispered, his bravado failing him for the first time in his life.
Hong’s smile softened, not quite realizing the shift in the atmosphere, but leaning in just a little closer.
♡
The garage felt heavy with the lingering scents from the band. William, Tui, and Lego had all left, along with Est, leaving the garage feeling too quiet. The streetlights hummed, casting long shadows over the abandoned equipment.
Nut stayed perched behind his drums, his heart still beating to a tempo he couldn’t control.
He was an Alpha.
He was supposed to feel powerful, certain. Instead, he felt like he was wearing a shirt that didn’t fit, terrified that this new realization was a wall building between himself and the person he needed most.
Hong hadn’t left, though. He was still sitting there, wiping down his guitar strings, his movements steady and normal as if he didn’t understand the gravity of what was changing between all of them.
William and Lego were the last to present, but everything already felt different. They weren’t all just friends anymore. There was a new dynamic they all had to swerve around.
William was an alpha.
Est, an omega.
Tui was a beta.
Lego, another omega.
Hong–a beta.
It was all different now.
“You can stop pretending to be a statue,” Hong said, his voice cutting through the silence, “They’re gone.”
Nut dropped his sticks, his eyes watching as they clattered against the snare, “I’m not a statue. I’m just… thinking.”
“About how you’re an alpha?” Hong asked, finally looking up. His expression was unreadable, but his scent–fresh bread and lilies–was calming as always. Nut never realized how much those scents smelled so good to him before, “You’ve been weird about it for a bit now.”
“Everything is different now, Hong,” Nut said, his voice cracking with a vulnerability he wasn’t aware he had. He stood up, his hands shaking slightly until he closed them into fists at his side, “The way everyone looks at me now, the way I have to watch my temper… I don’t want you to look at me like I’m some kind of predator. I don’t want to be an alpha to you. I just want to be Nut.”
Hong stood up, setting his guitar aside. He walked over until he was standing right in Nut’s space, the kind of proximity that would have made Nut’s instinct roar if it were anyone else, but with Hong, it just felt like coming home.
“Last time I checked, you are just Nut,” Hong said firmly. He reached out, his fingers grazing the sleeve of Nut’s shirt, hesitant, but there. “You’re still the annoying kid who shook me out of a tree. You think a secondary gender changes that?”
Nut’s throat was tight.
He wanted to say, ‘Yes, because now I want to claim you.’
He wanted to say, ‘Yes, because now it feels like I can’t breathe when you’re not near me’.
Instead, he forced out a breathy laugh, “I’m still annoying?”
“The most annoying person I know,” Hong nodded. He didn’t pull his hand away. He didn’t admit that he’d spent the last few days feeling a strange ache because he couldn’t provide the match with the Alpha’s biology supposedly craved. He didn’t admit he was terrified Nut would eventually go looking for an omega who could.
They stood there in the humid garage, caught in a silence that left so many things unsaid. Nut looked at Hong, at the steady gaze and the stubborn set of his jaw, and felt the terrifying urge to lean down and see if Hong’s skin tasted as calm as he smelled.
“Good,” Nut finally said, his voice dropping slightly, “Don’t let me be anything else.”
Hong’s eyes searched Nut’s, a flicker of something–longing, fear, or maybe just hope–passing through them before he looked away.
“I couldn’t if I tried.”
♡
The humid Bangkok air felt heavier than usual, tainted by the lingering fallout of Est leaving the friend group behind for Meen. The betrayal still sat like stones on William’s shoulders. He sat on the curb a few feet away, staring at his phone with a dark intensity that warned everyone away, his heart still waiting for Est to come waltzing back in, but they all knew he wouldn’t. He hadn’t spoken about what Est said yet, but Nut had been there for the aftermath with Hong. They watched how William cried.
LYKN, now a six-piece with Perth, were trying to navigate the fractured mood, huddled around Nut’s truck. Lego, Perth, and Tui were leaning on the other side of the truck, talking about some club that Perth heard good things about and needed a band to take the stage. Hong sat in the car's bed, focused on his bass. Nut’s arms rested on the truck, his eyes watching Hong.
Becky, an omega with a scent of peaches and whipped cream, saw the opening she needed. She drifted toward Nut, her pheromones flaring in a way that was meant to soothe a stressed alpha–or claim one.
“You look like you’re carrying the world on your shoulders, Nut,” Becky murmured, stepping into his space. He was leaning against the side of his truck when she reached out, her fingers grazing the collar of his shirt. “You shouldn’t let everything get to you. You need something… else to focus on.”
Nut stiffened. His alpha instincts spiked, but not with attraction. The cloying sweetness of her scent felt like an intrusion, a physical weight he wanted to shake off. His eyes instinctively darted to Hong.
Hong was sitting there, lazily brushing his fingers over the strings of his bass guitar. As a Beta, his scent wasn’t as overwhelming and couldn’t compete with the cloud of sweetness from Becky. He didn’t have to growl to ward her off. He just watched, his face a mask of calm that Nut knew was a lie. He saw the way Hong’s jaw was set tight, the way his knuckles were white against the neck of the bass.
Nut’s gaze was a silent, desperate plea.
Don’t let her do this.
Hong finally set down his bass. He moved with a quiet presence, sliding across the bed of the truck until he was behind Nut, his arm draping over Nut’s shoulder. He wasn’t pushing, simply occupying the space as if he belonged there, which he did.
“Nut, we have to get ready to head for the show,” Hong said, his voice flat. He didn’t look at Becky. He only looked at Nut, his eyes challenging, “Unless you’re too busy being comforted?”
“Not busy,” Nut said instantly, his voice light with relief. He practically scrambled into the driver’s seat of the truck, away from the overwhelming sweet scent of peaches and cream.
Becky huffed, her scent turning sharp with irritation as she realized her omega scent basically meant nothing when trumped by a beta’s mere presence. She turned on her heels and stomped away. Lego, who had been on the other side of the truck with Tui and Perth, covered his mouth as he giggled, muttering to Tui about biological warfare fails.
Hong hopped out of the back of the truck and moved to sit in the passenger’s seat. He crossedhis arms, “You’re a disaster. You just let her stand there and scent-mark you.”
“I couldn’t move,” Nut admitted, his voice low with guilt. He leaned over the console, taking a whiff of Hong’s fresh-baked bread and lilies' scent to clear his nose. A scent that was just so Hong and exactly what Nut needed, “I can’t breathe when they do that. I only feel like myself when you’re standing right there.”
Hong looked away from Nut, rolling his eyes, but a faint flush crept up his neck, “I’m a Beta, Nut. I can’t compete with an omega. It’s literally science.”
Nut huffed out a laugh, his forehead coming to rest against Hong’s shoulder, breathing in more of his scent, “Compete? Hong, you’ve already won. You won it when we were five years old, and you climbed down that tree and called me annoying.”
The air stilled between them.
For a second, everything just stopped.
Hong finally looked at Nut again, his eyes searching Nut’s with a mixture of longing and deep, ingrained skepticism. He didn’t cave. He didn’t lean in. Instead, he reached up and firmly planted a hand on Nut’s shoulder, pushing him back to sit, enough to reestablish the boundary.
“Don’t say things like that just because you’re overwhelmed by pheromones,” Hong said, his voice steady, but his eyes said something else. “You’re an alpha in a rut-adjacent stress, and I’m the only safe harbor you know. That’s not winning, Nut. That’s just convenience.”
Nut felt the rejection like an arrow to the chest, his alpha pride stinging, but it was eclipsed by the realization that Hong was still protecting himself.
“It’s not convenience,” Nut whispered, reaching out to catch Hong’s wrist, “It’s you.”
Hong pulled his wrist back, moving to leave the safety of the car, “Go wash the smell off of you, Nut. We have a setlist ot finish.”
He slammed the door shut and trudged to his own car. Lego looked back at Nut before quickly following after Hong. Nut was left alone in the truck, the victory he claimed feeling a lot more like a stalemate.
♡
The adrenaline from the MARS stage was still vibrating in Nut’s bones, a roar louder than any Alpha instinct he’d ever felt. The sold-out crowd, the lights, the way LYKN had played as one–it was a peak he’d been climbing since he was first picked up drumsticks.
Backstage was chaos as Tui and Lego celebrated, and William smiled softly, despite his shoulders slightly slumping. The memory of Perth’s shadow, walking out and taking Santa with him, had left the alpha even more hollowed out than he had been several years ago when Est had left. Though Nut only had eyes for the person who had been his anchor through every skipped beat and broken drumstick.
Hong was heading for the green room, his face flushed from the performance, wiping sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand. He looked like the same boy from the tree, just older and steadier, but far more important to Nut’s life than he ever anticipated.
Nut grabbed his wrist, stopping him from going in. He tugged Hong away from the other three to a quiet corner, “We did it.”
The air between them was electric, stripped of all the secret, longing looks and hidden insecurities that society put on them.
“Yeah, we did,” Hong replied with a tired, proud smile, “You were incredible, Nut.”
Nut didn’t give him a chance to say anything else. He reached out, cupping Hong’s face with hands that were still shaking from the high of the show, and pulled him in.
The kiss wasn’t the tentative, questioning thing Nut had imagined for years. It was a claim. It was desperate and grounding all at once, tasting of salt and triumph. For a heartbeat, Nut felt Hong melt, felt the hitch in his breath and the way his fingers curled into the fabric of Nut’s vest, pulling him closer.
For a beautiful second, it was just them.
But then, Hong stiffened.
He pulled back, his breath coming out in ragged gasps, his eyes wide and clouded with something like fear that had nothing to do with the stage. He looked at Nut, and the old walls slammed back in place.
“Nut, stop,” Hong whispered, his voice trembling. He wanted to lean back in; his body was literally leaning toward the warmth Nut radiated, but his mind was a fortress of what-if.
“Hong–”
“No,” Hong said, stepping back until his shoulders hit the wall, “You don’t get to do that. You’re riding a high. Right now, it feels like you conquered the world, but tomorrow, the world is going to look very different. You’ll realize you need someone who… matches that energy. Someone who can actually give you what an Alpha needs.”
“I told you years ago,” Nut said, his voice dropping to a painful growl, “There is going to be no one else. There is just you. Why are you still fighting this? I’ve wanted you since I was ten.”
“Because I’m scared!”
Nut’s eyes widened as Hong finally snapped. Tears pricked at the corner of Hong’s eyes, his lip trembling, “I’m scared that if I give in, and then you realize I’m not enough– … I can’t lose you, Nut. I can’t lose the only person who ever made me feel like I was home.”
When Nut attempted to reach out, Hong pulled his hand to his chest, shaking his head. Nut whimpered, “Hong…, please. I don’t want an omega or some bond. I want the person who told me I was annoying before he even knew my name.”
“You say that now,” Hong said, the tears spilling over. He looked at the door where the rest of the band was waiting, “Look at William. Look what Est did to him, what Santa did. We knew how much William loved Est, and Est still picked someone else. We thought William would be happy with Santa, but Santa chose Perth. They were both omegas, and they still left. If I give in to you and I’m not enough, I’ll lose you.”
He squeezed his hands into a fist, “So I can’t have you.”
Hong left Nut standing in the hallway of the biggest night of their lives so far, the taste of the kiss still lingering like a promise Hong wasn’t ready to keep.
♡
The tension that built up between Hong and Nut after the argument in front of Nanon had finally reached a fever-pitch. Nut and Hong had laid it on William how much they disapproved of William just allowing Est to walk back into his life, like he hadn’t been the first place in William’s life that was shattered. Then Lego had to bring up the feeling between Nut and Hong, something that remained unspoken since that kiss after their first sold-out stage in MARS.
They had gotten drinks with the rest of the members, celebrating their new contract with NKK Entertainment and working with their senior, Nanon, but Nut and Hong remained. The other three returned to their lives outside LYKN, but they were still so tied to each other.
“So are we going to talk about it?” Nut asked, his voice stripped of the excitement from their contract, now replaced with vulnerability.
Hong didn’t look at Nut, his eyes focused on the glass in front of him, “What part?”
“How long are you going to keep denying you’re in love with me?”
The beta groaned, finally looking up at Nut, “Please, Nut. Let’s not do this.”
“No, because for all these years, you’ve been scared that I will choose some omega over you,” Nut shook his head, “And I’m still here, Hong. Waiting. I never left. We're always together. We have lived together since college. There is nothing else but this for me.”
Hong’s grip tightened around his glass until his knuckles went white. He wanted to look away, to retreat into that safe quiet that had protected him since they were children, but Nut was there–solid, immovable, and radiating that relentless Alpha that Hong hated that he loved.
“It’s not just about omegas, Nut,” Hong’s voice cracking, “You know that. If this fails…., I’ll lose everything I’ve known since I was five years old.”
Nut moved, stepping around the table so he could sit by Hong, invading his space until their knees brushed. The bravado he’d used to lecture William about Est was long gone, replaced by his own vulnerability and fear, “You think I’m not scared too? I’ve been holding my breath for almost twenty years, Hong. Every time you pull away, I feel like I’m falling out of a tree with no one to catch me.”
He reached out, his fingers trembling as they hooked under Hong’s chin, forcing their eyes to meet, “The contract with NKK Entertainment is signed. The band is starting over with Nanon. Everything is changing. Please… don’t let the only thing that stays the same be us pretending we don’t belong to each other.”
Hong searched Nut’s face, looking for any sign that Nut would abandon him one day as he feared, but all he found was a deep devotion that made his own heart ache. Nut was choosing him even when their own biology might one day force their hand, but Hong was starting to realize that he might not have to fear that with Nut. The wall he’d built out of logic and secondary genders began to crumble.
“You’re so annoying,” Hong choked out, a single tear escaping. “You always have to win, don’t you?”
“I haven’t won anything until I have you,” Nut murmured, his thumb brushing the tear away.
Finally, Hong let go of the glass. He reached up, his hands tangling in Nut’s hair and pulling him in for a kiss that tasted like rum and a decade of suppressed longing. It wasn’t a frantic or adrenaline-fueled kiss like in the hallway of MARS; it was slow, heavy, and awakening.
When they pulled apart, the air felt lighter, the secret finally exhausted into the night.
“So,” Hong breathed, his forehead resting against Nut’s, “What do we tell the others tomorrow?”
“Let Lego smugly say his ship is sailing first and let Tui cheer,” Nut joked, “Then we tell William he’s no longer the only one with a complicated love life.”
♡
The first show of the tour had been a whirlwind of neon lights and screaming fans, so much so that it was hard for the members of LYKN to believe they had once just been friends in Nut’s garage, playing songs, and now standing in front of thousands, with more dates of their tour still coming.
The air had felt bittersweet leading up to the stage since the group was still reeling from Est’s departure to Paris just after Perth and Santa’s wedding. William was still trying to piece together how to survive without Est in his life, but the days kept passing. Even with Est’s promise to return, there was still that void that was a haunting reminder of how fragile forever could be.
Even with that, the energy on stage was electric and full of life.
As the final notes of their encore faded into the rafters of the stadium, the adrenaline was coursing through Nut’s veins. He looked at Hong, whose smile was bright as he wiped sweat from his brow.
He didn’t wait for a private moment this time.
In the middle of the stage, with the house lights starting to rise and the fans still lingering in their seats, Nut suddenly dropped to his knee.
The stadium went from a dull roar to a deafening, unified gasp. Lego froze mid-wave, and Tui nearly tripped over cables on the stage. William, standing just off to the side, looked on with a mixture of shock and a painful longing for what he’d lost.
“Nut?” Hong breathed, his heart hammering in his chest. He looked down at the alpha, his eyes wide with a terror that was slowly becoming something radiant, “What are you doing? Get up, everyone is watching.”
“Let them,” Nut said, his voice amplified by the stray microphone still clipped to his shirt. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a simple silver band. There were no flashy stones, just a solid promise.
“I spent the last twenty years trying to shake you out of that tree. I spent the last ten years pretending I didn’t want to kiss you, and I spent the last few years realizing that no matter how many stadiums or shows we sell out, the only home I have is where you’re standing.”
Nut’s hands were shaking. They were the same hands that just played a two-hour set without missing a beat, and yet, they were shaking, “I know you’re scared of things breaking. I know you’ve seen what happens to those around us, but we’re not them, Hong. And we aren’t a match made by biology. We’re a choice, and I’m choosing you–every single day of my life. If you’ll have me?”
Hong’s vision blurred, the sea of lights in the crowd turning into a shimmering galaxy. He looked at the ring, then at the man who been his annoying shadow since he was five years old. The fear of not being enough finally evaporated, replaced by the weight of two decades of shared history.
“You’re so incredibly annoying,” Hong choked out, a sob breaking through his laughter.
“Is that a yes?” Nut asked, his grin widening even as his eyes welled with tears.
Hong didn’t answer with words. He dropped to his knees, closing the distance and pulling Nut into a kiss that was broadcast on every Jumbotron in the arena and would probably be on every social media platform within the hours.
“Yes,” Hong whispered against his lips, loud enough for only Nut to hear. “Yes, you idiot. Always.”
As the ground erupted into a sound that rivaled the actual concert, Lego and Tui started cheering, and William let out a breath he’d been holding, a small, hopeful smile touching his face.
♡
The heavy, floral scent of lilies and the lingering sweetness of the cake from the reception hall were now salt-tinged by the night air of the balcony of their hotel in Pattaya. The wedding had been everything the fans and industry expected: a star-studded affair under NKK Entertainment with William delivering a toast that brought even the stoic Nanon to tears. Tui and Lego opted to be the most chaotic duo in history, and Est had returned, standing beside Hong with a smile on his face.
But now, the noise was gone.
Nut leaned against the railing, his dress shirt unbuttoned at the collar, and his tuxedo jacket discarded somewhere on the bed behind him. He looked at the silver band on his finger, then at the identical one on Hong’s finger.
“Finally,” Nut breathed, his voice a satisfied rumble, “No more secret longing. No more alpha-beta insecurities. Just… this.”
Hong stepped up beside him, his arm going around Nut’s shoulder as he rested his cheek against Nut’s shoulder. He looked out at the water, a soft smile on his lips as he enjoyed the cool air against his face.
“You really did it,” Hong murmured, “You actually convinced that stubborn kid from the tree to marry you.”
“I told you... I get worse,” Nut joked, turning to face Hong. Hong’s arms naturally wrapped around Nut’s neck while Nut’s arms found their spot around his waist. His eyes traveled over Hong’s face; the curve of his nose, the feline shape of his eyes, the line of his jaw. His alpha felt content and steady, as if this was how it would always end. “Are you still scared? That you aren’t enough for this Alpha?”
Hong leaned into Nut, his eyes fluttering shut, “I think after a sold-out tour, a public engagement, and a wedding where half the country was watching… I think I’m starting to believe you.”
Nut chuckled, nuzzling Hong’s cheek with his nose, leaving sniff kisses on his cheek that made Hong giggle. He opened his eyes, a knowing smile playing on his lips, “Besides, if you ever did find an omega, I’d run them off anyway. Like I did back in high school and university.”
The laugh from Nut was bright and clear, echoing into the night air. He pulled Hong in closer, his forehead pressing against Hong’s.
“I’m not going anywhere,” he whispered, “You’re my home, Hong. My only one.”
The kiss that followed was slow and deep, a quiet vow exchanged in the dark that meant more than any speech. In the silence of the night, there are no secondary genders, no band dynamics, and no fame.
They were just the same two boys who had grown up together and finally found where they were meant to be.
“You know,” Hong whispered against Nut’s lips, “This isn’t just our wedding night. It’s the anniversary of the day I met you.”
Nut hummed, “It’s almost like we planned it that way.”
Hong chuckled, “My life started when you shook that tree, Nut.”
The alpha smiled, “Mine did too.”
♡