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There are people who always choose the safer path, even when they know it’s not what their heart truly wants.
Gorya was one of them. Time and time again, she would end up in the arms of someone who loved her completely, without hesitation, without fear of getting hurt. Not because she couldn’t love fiercely herself, but because she was afraid, afraid of being hurt again. Afraid of being the only one pouring everything into a relationship while the other held back.
So whenever someone came along who was certain, who made her feel chosen without doubt, she accepted it. It was easier, it hurt less.
The first day she was assigned as Prim’s personal stylist at the agency, the world seemed to pause.
Oh Prim, the ever lovely director known for her sharp mind, calm demeanor, and gentleness. Tall, beautiful smile, with the gaze and attentiveness that made Gorya feel like the only person in the room.
“Gorya, 'di ba? Salamat ha sa tulong. Hulog ka ng langit,” Prim said with a soft smile.
Gorya’s hands trembled. Not just from work nerves, but from her. From that very first look, she was already falling.
As the weeks passed, the feelings only grew deeper, Prim always found time to check in. “Kumain ka na ba?” she would ask. “Pagod ka na ba? Wag mong kalimutan magpahinga ha? Hindi porke't busy ako, ‘di mo na aalagaan sarili mo,” she said one afternoon, pressing a warm cup of coffee into Gorya’s hands during a long shoot. When the set got cold, Prim was the first to drape her jacket over Gorya’s shoulders. When an outfit didn’t feel right, she’d say gently, “You look perfect. Huwag kang mag-alala,” her voice carrying affection that Gorya never got tired of receiving.
Soon they were texting even when there was no work to discuss. Simple “Good morning” messages with sun emojis. “Kumusta ka?” that somehow felt heavier than usual, and "I miss you's" that felt too real to ignore. Late nights after exhausting days turned into long conversations. Prim laughed at Gorya’s corny jokes, called her “my little stylist” with a sweetness that made Gorya’s chest ache. And Gorya let herself believe, maybe Prim loved her too.
Maybe this was it.
But the deeper she fell, the more cracks appeared. There were moments when Prim seemed distant, even while smiling and nodding. Her eyes would drift somewhere far away, carrying thoughts she wouldn’t share.
Gorya has heard about it. The ex who had suddenly reappeared as a client. The one Prim still couldn’t fully let go of, no matter how much time had passed.
Doubt crept in. Still, Gorya tried to hold on. She told herself her love could be enough to erase every old memory. So when Prim invited her to dinner “para mag-relax,” she went. When Prim held her hand a little longer than necessary, she let it linger. But deep down, she knew, Prim’s heart wasn’t fully there. She was just being entertained, not truly loved.
Then Shasha arrived.
Shasha with that overwhelming presence, unshakable confidence, and shameless player reputation. From the start, she irritated Gorya. “Gorya, ba’t ang layo mo? Come here, I need help,” she’d say in the dressing room, taking off her clothes without a hint of shame, flashing that infuriating grin. Always teasing, always chasing. No matter how many times Gorya brushed her off or said “no,” Shasha came back.
“I’m not giving up, alam mo 'yan,” she declared once, staring straight into Gorya’s eyes.
Annoying. Frustrating. But there was something different in the way Shasha looked at her, no fear, no hesitation.
No uncertainty.
Like she was ready to get hurt over and over if it meant even the smallest chance of seeing Gorya smile.
One evening, Gorya saw it. Prim and Bambi in a corner, away from everyone. Bambi pulled Prim close and kissed her. Gorya didn’t even flinch in shock, but the pain was immediate and brutal, like something inside her chest had cracked open.
She wasn’t surprised though, she had felt the emptiness for a long time. She had known, somewhere deep, that Prim would never choose her completely.
She sat on the building’s staircase alone, trying to muffle her own cries. Not even just because of the kiss, but because the same pattern kept repeating in her life. She loved someone who couldn’t love her back the way she needed, and she always ended up being the one who was willing to give everything, even when she wasn’t sure it would return completely.
The next morning, Shasha arrived early. She found Gorya still on the same staircase, looking like she hadn’t slept. Shasha didn’t ask questions right away, she just sat beside her in silence. After a few minutes, she spoke softly.
“You know… you’re shit at hiding feelings.” She started, trying to rage bait Gorya but with the purpose of making her smile despite looking ruined.
“Well, who am I to judge, I’m hella obvious.” She smiled, “Kahit ilang beses mo akong iwasan, kahit ilang beses mo akong ireject, babalik pa rin ako.”
Gorya didn’t answer immediately, but slowly, she turned to look at Shasha. For the first time, she saw no doubt. No “maybe.” No “if it’s convenient.” in those eyes.
Shasha was certain, Shasha was ready. Shasha loved her, and isn’t afraid to say it.
The hurt from Prim didn’t vanish overnight. But over the following days, something shifted, she started noticing the small things. Shasha bringing her favorite drink without being asked, Shasha waiting outside the set long after call time just to walk her out. Shasha saying “miss na kita” or “ganda mo, pakiss nga” in front of other people, shameless and unafraid.
And bit by bit, Gorya noticed, she wasn’t just being loved. There was space, maybe, for her to love back.
One night, on the rooftop overlooking the city lights, Gorya finally spoke.
“Shasha… you’re confusing me.”
Shasha looked at her, eyes bright with hope but never rushing.
“You don’t have to choose right now.” Shasha answered.
“Just let me, hayaan mo lang ako. I’ve loved you without expecting anything in return for months.” She added, “Nothing’s stopping me from going on forever.”
Gorya didn’t reply right away. Instead, she reached for Shasha’s hand. For the first time in a long while, the fear of being hurt again didn’t feel so heavy.
Because maybe, just maybe, she could fall too. Maybe she could love without the constant dread of not being loved in return.
And there, under the cold night air and the glow of Manila’s lights, Gorya thought, this is finally it.