Chapter Text
The fight was tough.
The crack in the Barrier got so huge that even all together Shirogane, Akira and Kou got overwhelmed by the number of kokuchi and the sheer amount of shadow pouring into the human world. It also didn't help that it was their third battle for today. Everyone was visibly exhausted as it ended, even Shirogane turned away and leaned against a nearby tree to catch his breath. And, of course, Akira ended up lying on the ground, again.
As the distorted red sky returs to it's normal state, it reveals it's true state: a cold, gray day at a suburban gas station.
Man. What a wild ride.
Kou sits on a log, keeping an eye on his comrades. After that epic battle with Homurabi the Balance between Light and Shadow became extremely unstable and would break in the most unpredictable ways. It wasn't just darkness invading the human world now. Light was leaking into the Shadow world as well, sucking in people and disturbing its inhabitants. Kou wasn’t the one to do the thinking, but he was told that it was probably a pendulum effect — after being skewed towards the Shadow for so long the awakening of the Direct Royal Rei and simultaneous release and reduction of darkness on Homurabi’s part made the Balance swing back and forth erratically, re-calibrating and adapting. Also it seems like Shisui was the one who came up with this explanation, which for some reason gave it extra credibility in Kou’s eyes. He personally found it reasonable, and was pretty glad that Shirogane and Homurabi also deemed so.
But the strategy that followed was to focus on mending cracks and see what’d come next. Nice plan, but the workload’s no joke.
Shirogane finally straightens up. As he turns around, Kou can immediately tell he's furious. It's honestly easier for him when the Shadow King acts like this, at least one can tell what's on his mind rather than guessing what kind of thoughts he’s thinking behind that candy-sweet smile. Nonetheless, real Shirogane is still real Shirogane, and Kou tenses up as he charges towards his counterpart.
“What the heck are you doing? Did you accept the vow just to fail whenever you get the chance? You may have left it to someone more competent.”
“Stop yelling at me,” Akira replies apathetically, still not moving.
“I haven't even started!”
“You did.”
Kou clenches his fists. Simply observing this interaction doesn’t feel quite right to him, but he also knows not to be overbearing. He wishes he knew more about the world and stood up for Ryuuko back in the day. Now, however, that's ironically an urge he has to be very mindful of.
Luckily, Akira manages to remain calm anyway.
“Besides, don't act as if you yourself didn't mess up.”
“Huh?!”
Whoa? That’s interesting. Kou involuntarily raises a brow, noting that Shirogane also looks taken aback.
“Or do you think I can't see it?” Akira, meanwhile, slowly sits up and rubs his back with both hands tiredly, not even looking at the Shadow. Everything in his appearance screams that he’s too exhausted to take the bait. “Back then you missed that move. You know what I'm talking about. Sure I'm no good either but you could've done a better job foreseeing how that'd play out.”
Kou can’t quite see what’s going on with Shirogane’s face, and that’s a huge shame to him. He could bet, however, that he’s blinking in disbelief.
“Are you for real?”
“I saw your face. Again. You know what I'm talking about.”
A pause follows. Intriguing as it is, Kou feels very uneasy from this twist. He knows how petty Shirogane can be, and even if he wouldn’t go as far as harming in revenge, he still doesn’t want Aki to go through the mental consequences of his words.
“No, I don’t,” Shirogane finally replies.
To that Akira sighs. And this confuses Kou even more, because he doesn’t remember him to be so tolerant.
“You can't just bruteforce your way every time and expect the rest to handle the impact.“
But that's exactly how Shirogane fights, Kou thinks to himself.
“Back then in the human world you operated way more efficiently,” Akira goes on. “You were compromised under the stress of your circumstance and still managed to get through even though the rest of us were rookies with two left hands.”
He finally gets on his feet and looks at his counterpart directly.
“What's wrong with you? You should go get some rest.”
Shirogane stares back at him in intense silence. Apparently he’s also not sure what to think about this sudden bout.
“The audacity to tell me that when you still end up on the ground half of the battles.”
“Nonetheless I recover and you don't seem to.”
“You little bastard,” he almost hisses.
And yet Akira still remains unbothered.
“Also watch your language. I'd like you to uphold the face of a royal.”
… now both Shirogane and Kow went speechless.
“Shirogane.”
Akira’s voice unexpectedly softens. And if up to this point everything he said was only somewhat uncharacteristic of him, this one hit really hard. This tone felt solid, almost stern. But at the same time…
It feels engaged in a very caring way. As if Akira was genuinely concerned. And it’s warm.
It truly is very new, because while Ryuuko was infinitely kind and loving, he, well, was just that. This Akira’s caringness, however, doesn’t feel light. It’s heavy. The kind of care that you get from a person who knows what he’s talking about.
That one single word, said in that tone, unwillingly made Kou marvel.
“I'm not telling this to annoy you,” Akira continued with patience. “Go back to the palace and rest. We'll take care of whatever kokuchi pops up again.”
…
Kou pierces his gaze into Shirogane.
The King of Shadow keeps silent again. It feels genuinely satisfying to see him at a loss. Kou can only imagine how enraged he’d be had Ryuuko said this to him. He, however, can’t quite imagine Ryuuko saying all those previous things. Now Shirogane clearly looks contested, so it must've really gotten to him. What is he going to do next?
… unfortunately, here it comes. A quick glance thrown at Kou, signalling that the Royal Shin is still aware of his presence. Of course, no way in the world would Kou feel out of place in this situation, if anything, he’d prefer to not leave Akira alone with Shirogane at all. But he does suspect that this little bit of awareness just killed the juice.
As Shirogane speaks out again, his voice turns ice cold, and he doesn’t lash out as usual, instead maintaining immaculately proper language. No doubt he's doing it on purpose.
“How highly must you think of yourself to say that to me.”
Kou almost clicks his tongue. Come on! Throwing in some questionable appeal to authority? What a disappointing move! Although he does have a feeling that there aren’t a lot of sane ways for Shirogane to reply here.
As for Akira, he just sighs.
“Gosh, it's not like that at all.”
And then he takes a step closer and takes Shirogane’s hand in his own. Looks him straight in the eye.
“I'm your destiny, Shirogane. I don't want to see you struggling more than you have to. Go back to the Palace. Most likely there aren't gonna be any new cracks in this area. We'll do the rest.”
…
Shirogane stays motionless. It’s almost like he simply can’t process what’s just been said to muster a cohesive reaction. And Kou, even baffled himself, is sure: that must’ve been a serious blow.
Eventually the Shadow yanks his hand from Akira’s grip.
“I can’t believe you’re this hopeless.”
With those words he turns around and disappears into thin air. The echo of his voice lingers in the wind quite eerily. And it takes some time for Kou to realize how worn out he himself is after juat watching this interaction.
Silence lingers for another few moments.
… what the hell just happened?
“Hey, Kou-nii. You okay?” After a pause Akira finally turns his head to him. “Let’s go grab something to eat.”
“Ugh... yeah, man. I'm starving to death.”
Both of them acted nothing like before. He absolutely needs to talk about this.
***
“Aki.”
“Huh?”
“You do realize Shirogane was never sincere? Like… you know what I mean?”
The gentle breeze of the lake soothes. Thankfully the clouds have cleared up by evening, and now the setting sun delicatly peeks at them from the horizon. They’re sitting on the shore near the lighthouse, having some kombini-bought onigiri for dinner. No further incidents have occurred, so they took the chance to relax a little. Interestingly enough, from Kou’s knowledge this is the exact place Akira used to retreat to for some alone time. That adds some weight, somehow.
Kou tries to keep his voice a certain way. This is a sensitive topic, he knows — or at least thinks so. He's got no idea what Akira is thinking, but messing with Shirogane’s self-esteem is never a safe thing to do. Kou’s adamant he must protect his King, even if that may turn out to be in his good old brotherly way.
But once again Akira seems surprisingly unfazed.
“Cut that bullshit. I'm not dumb. Of course I know.”
“Really?”
This doesn't make much sense.
“But why do you then…”
“I'm just pulling the same tricks he played on me when we just met.”
“... oh.”
Okay. Now he sees. But why in the world would Akira do that?
“... I don't get it.”
“Again,” he seems genuinely disinterested. “I'm not dumb. I knew Shirogane was seeing someone else in me from the very beginning. And he's not that smart either, not as much as he thinks he is. He slipped up a couple of times.”
“Oh? He called you Ryuuko’s name? Aki, what were you two doing?”
At once Akira stared him down.
“Do you not like living?”
“Okay, okay, just kidding.”
But then Akira returns to his rather apathetic attitude.
“No, nothing that bad. Just a phrase or two that obviously couldn't be addressed to someone you've just met.”
“And now?”
“And now, you say…”
He looks off into the distance.
“Put it this way. After everything, and having Ryuuko’s memories, I think having a little taste of what he serves would be good for him.”
And then a smirk appears on his face.
“Besides, it's funny to see him like I was.”
Kou blinks. Lets it settle in. Blinks again.
“So it's basically the «I’m not stuck with you, you're stuck with me» game… Aki, that’s brilliant! I love it!”
Kou starts clapping his hands in amusement, and Akira smiles smugly. He’s definitely pleased with this reaction.
“Two can play this game,” he adds with a hint of triumph.
Kou bursts into laughter, feeling genuine relief. Turns out he’s been underestimating Akira quite a bit to assume he’s that simple. Although this sort of affair isn’t much safer, at least he seems to assess things adequately. Not to mention that he’s good at his game. Thinking that, Kou lies back on the rock, supporting himself with his elbows.
“Gotta say you're way better at this than Shirogane,” he says in a light-hearted manner. “He looked so shady with those manners of his. But you looked like you really cared.”
“Well, it's not like I don't,” Akira clarifies at first, but then his expression becomes much harsher. He even clenches his fists. “However, I'm still pissed. Never thought Shirogane was a particularly honest guy to begin with, but what the fuck? He kept that facade even when he supposedly was sick and doubted that I'm the one. Thinking back, he must've still tried to manipulate me into revealing myself somewhere. He's absurdly cunning.”
“Yeah, that’s our Shirogane,” Kou lets out another light-hearted laugh. “He can be insufferable, I know.”
Actually that’s not all that fun for Kou either. The thought of Shirogane bashing Akira the way he did with Ryuuko is exactly what made him start this conversation in the first place. And still… there's something in Akira’s energy that doesn't sit right with him.
“Don't you think it's a bit of an overkill, though?” he looks at Akira with a bit of an inquiry, making his voice sound thoughtful. “Don't get me wrong, I'm with you, he definitely had it coming. Truth told, I'm all in. But…”
Then Kou turns his gaze to the lake and takes a second to put his thoughts into words.
“I mean, he's basically been living almost twenty years with the idea that he'll revive his closest person.” And, honestly, that one he can understand fully. “And in this state…”
For once Akira gets annoyed. Finally.
“Huh? What the hell are you saying, Kou-nii? He basically wanted to get rid of me and steal my body for a dead man. And he keeps blaming me for not surrendering to that! He did that just today! By that logic I could've go on about how I could revive Kengo as the Direct Royal Shin and miraculously have less headache than with him and his dumb antics. How about that?”
… that was very, very angry.
Kou doesn’t know what to say. Even Akira himself seems to be surprised by his own words.
“Anyways,” he hurriedly tries to move on, “that's his own business. I can't understand things for him.”
Kou simply nods. A pretty heavy pause follows after. Now the breeze somehow feels colder.
Eventually Kou chuckles.
“You know. Thinking back on my time with the Kings, I once came to a conclusion that by definition Shin Kings are petty shady bitches and Rei Kings are idealistic idiots who drive themselves to burnout. The former can be blinded by ambiguity of their own darkness, the latter — by inability to see beyond their headlights. It was interesting to watch you and Ken because of this, you two defied that duality. In fact, you kinda got it reversed.”
This pretty loose confession seems to work — at least Akira laughs out with a bit more ease.
“Are you really calling me a bitch, Kou-nii? Come on.”
“Hey, that's not what I meant! Or well, considering what you've just told, maybe just a little.”
They laugh at the joke again. However, after some thought Kou eventually adds in a serious tone.
“But in all seriousness right now you're stepping into some dangerously Shin territory, Aki. It's not even about Shirogane at this point.”
Akira grits his teeth. Probably that was uncomfortable for him to hear as he averts his gaze and closes off.
“I know what I'm doing.”
***
The evening scenery at the park really is peaceful.
All the red and orange leaves have already fallen off for good, and the crisp dry air reminds of the closeness of winter. Despite that, there’s still a lot of people walking down the alleys. Kids after school, couples of all ages, families with children — everyone seems to enjoy their moments of peace and recharge.
Shirogane’s sitting on a bench under a distant tree, observing the scenery pretty vacantly. He almost got lulled off into a slumber at some point, but awareness is gradually coming back to him. Unfortunately, it also took any restfulness away.
Geez. How come he ended up here.
Once upon a time Shirogane hated going into the human world. He very much preferred to stay in his Palace whenever he could, and absolutely expected to do just that once everything was over. However, today was exhausting and he was fed up with everyone and everything. That's when this place came to mind — he used to sit here a lot when he just got exiled. He couldn't think of anything better, so he came here.
That's right, he's here by his own volition. Not exiled anymore, just fleeing. He's not even enjoying it really, it just numbs the heavy nagging feeling of doom and meaninglessness.
That's pathetic. And yet he can’t help it.
… during that time Shirogane saw a lot. He learned to bite his tongue, to think before lashing out, and observed people in all kinds of places and circumstances. Or should he say that he didn't even have to learn it — he simply spent so much time alone that all of those old habits just fell off. Searching for Ryuuko’s reincarnation, Shirogane was so mobilized and hyperfocused that he’s somehow grown into putting up with things. He didn’t even pay attention to it because one day, he thought, everything would be back to normal.
But that didn’t happen.
And now he can barely stand being in the Palace for too long, at least not unoccupied.
First of all, everything in that place screams Ryuuko. His last moments in the Shadow world before expulsion were spent literally waiting for another mundane meeting with him, completely ignorant and unsuspecting. That’s already a lot to handle.
But second, upon return his homesickness didn't go anywhere at all. It felt like he was the round peg being fit into a square hole now. Previously he had no problem saying anything he deemed reasonable in whatever way he wanted; now, after playing nice for so long, showing raw emotions started to feel self-degrading. As if the moment he raises his voice he deliberately turns himself into some sort of entertainment for the likes of Kou, or simply gives away too much. Well… he wonders where he's got that perception from. That’s frustrating enough already, but he can no longer keep his composure either. As if the very air of the Palace is prompting him to return to his old ways. And Shirogane doesn't even want to think about the comments Akira made today.
This is so frustrating. He never even imagined something like this could be a problem at all.
A tired sigh escapes his mouth. Shirogane simply cannot comprehend yet that this is how things are. Probably he’s just utterly pissed off, tired and feels like he's got nowhere to go. Or even nowhere to be.
Is this really how it's going to be from now on?
No wonder sitting on a school rooftop seems more attractive now.
…
No, he can't.
He’s so angry at Akira that he doesn't even want to think about him, and yet he can't. Because today he was painfully right, and the fact that that douche noticed it means that it shows. And he dares to utilize it against him! Just thinking back on it makes Shirogane's blood boil. Ryuuko never did such things. Even if he pointed something out, he was always masterfully gentle. Shirogane hated to admit this, but his way of communication lifted others up even if the things he brought up were unpleasant. But Akira's remarks were different. They were simultaneously blunt and razor sharp, and Shirogane could’t not give in.
Now that his quest to regain his status is over, it seems like he can't sustain that game anymore. Reached a limit of some sort, and that's what aches. He doesn't want to remember how things were back then. He's sick of remembering how things were not so long ago.
So why does it feel like the one he's eventually fooled is himself?
In a wave of anger Shirogane kicks a rock. As he did so, the space where it landed started to visibly distort.
“Oh no, not again...”
He watches the Barrier slowly tearing apart right in front of his eyes.
…
“Hey,” he called out dryly.
A subtle jolt from behind a nearby tree followed.
“What are you waiting for? Hurry up and do your job for once.”
A lone hakua, the white, light counterpart of kokuchi revealed itself. It hesitated for a bit before rushing towards the tear and plopping itself onto it. Such annoying indecision. Come to think of it, Shirogane hasn't seen them like this in a while, and now the reason’s obvious: the creatures’s simply scared of him.
The King clenches his teeth.
He hates it.