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It was another scorching day in Gravity Falls. As the sun dimmed over the relatively quiet Mystery Shack, Stanley Pines - the con-man himself comes driving in his red car, a bit disgruntled after going to the store to pick up a few things, only to fight a short elderly lady in a robe over a jar of pickles and getting his ass handed to him. He doesn't even like pickles.
"Wait, why did i even buy that?" he says to himself, out loud of course. He groans, messily standing up from his car and locking it. He scratches his balls as he walks towards the shack's front entrance, shooing away Gompers as the goat tries to eat his license plate. A common occurrence here.
Suddenly, the world gets slightly darker, even though the Sun is still out, and everything is silent, even the wind is gone. "Huh, who turned off Earth's lights?" Stan says in confusion, scratching his head. Suddenly, a red light flashes from inside the shack, lighting up the entire forest in red for a split second as an '80s synth chord plays. Stan flinches and his glasses go flying onto the ground at the speed of his flinch. "Ah, my contacts!" He scrambles to go pick them up, before a bright white light then appears, playing the same synth chord and enveloping the forest in a white light for a second. "Ah, my eyes!"
The world then returns to normal like nothing just happened, and light comes back. "Alright, that's it," Stan storms towards the shack without even picking up his glasses or realizing he's been temporarily blinded twice. He tries to step foot on the stairs, but misses by an inch and drops full-speed onto them, the wood hitting his face hard. He just moans in pain, "My everything!"
He picks back up his glasses, along with the bag of groceries and properly walks up the stairs this time, though severely weakened and hurt. "Ugh, what did my crazy old brother summon this time?" he says, before his expression changes into one of total shock, dropping his bag of groceries, a glass breaking sound is heard from the bag dropping. "MICHAEL JACKSON!?" He shouts in genuine astonishment, as he sees Michael Jackson in his sequined jacket, black hat and glittering accessories casually moonwalking through the shack, singing Smooth Criminal while his genius twin brother and Dipper try to catch him. "Get down from there!" yells Ford as Michael stands on the kitchen counter. Ford dives for him, but he does a jump and so Ford's head dives right into a coffee cup. "AUGH, I'M BURNING!" Dipper grabs a towel to clean Ford's face. ""Great uncle Ford, don't worry, i'll help you!" Ford chokes on it, before Dipper helps him and he looks absolutely horrified. "Don't worry, it couldn't have been that bad, right?" Dipper says cheerfully, before Ford replies like he's telling a horror story "It was.. decaf!" Dipper's smile fades and he instantly says "Nevermind, good thing i saved you!"
Stan just stands there, utterly bewildered, picking up his bag of groceries while watching his gift shop be destroyed by the extrreme dances of Michael Jackson of all people, as well as some sort of ritual circle on the shop's rug, with a drawing of Michael Jackson's face in the middle, probably used to summon him. "What in the capital of Baltimore is all this!?" Ford hears Stan's voice and immediately stands up straight, clearing his throat. "Ah, Stanley, well, as you can see, i might've accidentally summoned the King of Pop himself, and well, he- he-" "HEE HEE!" Michael Jackson says, cutting off Ford. "STOP SAYING THAT!" Dipper yells at him.
"You know what? This should be normal for me at this point, let's just get this over with so i can punish you two later!" Stan unrolls his sleeve.
"Agreed." Ford and Dipper say, synchronized, before Dipper treads back on it. "Uhh, wait, i don't know about the 'punish' part though.."
