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Soul pauses - hand raised, palm facing down at Heart, an extremely sudden cease in kinetic energy.
When had he become the smaller person? When had he become a hypocrite; the same being who harps on and on about moral superiority? Was it not he who would bitch and moan day and night, praying to Harmonia, hoping and pleading that the fighting from his counterparts would finally cease? And yet, here he stands, no better than Heart or Mind.
Yet another pawn in this grand loop.
So badly, he wants to believe that’s all he is - a pawn. Then, in that case, his actions would not be his own. He would be destined to get violent, if he were simply a pawn - it wouldn’t be of his own volition. An off-write of guilt. It’d be written in the stars. He wouldn’t have a reason to feel ashamed, or-
(“Soul!”)
Startled, he looks down at Heart, who is sobbing - frightened. Heaving cries leave his throat and his chest rises up down up down up down so, so rapidly. The poor creature is petrified - but he deserves this, does he not? He is lucky he isn’t going back to Apathy. And there he sits - crying like a pathetic, petulant child - accepting his fate.
He can’t see Soul, but knows what’s coming, regardless. This has happened before. There’s no reason for it to be any different. (There’s no reason to beg for mercy), he thinks, (let’s just get this over with.)
And yet - perhaps this time is different. Heart expects a slap to the face, a kick to the ribs, pulling of hair, screaming into ears and the cracking of bones. Yet, Soul is just… standing there. Perhaps, begging could work this time, if this situation is beginning to stray from the original pattern - the one dictated by the first, second, third loops.
Still crying, Heart slowly pulls his arms from the defensive position they were in. He’s afraid to ask if Soul is even there anymore, but he does, regardless.
(“Soul…?”)
Soul continues to look down upon the wretched creature, and looking at him, there’s subtle realization - a question - he can’t quite seem to shake... why is he doing this? Doesn’t Mind do this, too? In that case, no better than Heart or Mind, is the Soul. He who whines and cries and begs for greener pastures, yet persists with his own depravity and madness - he who denies his own ignorance towards his contributions to their calamity - he is no better.
In an attempt to shut down that self doubt, he comforts himself with the notion that Heart fucked up, and he deserves this. But wouldn’t Mind say the same?
Stifled and low, he simply responds, {“Go.”}
Heart doesn’t go. Instead, with all the panicked energy rushing through his body, he begins to …apologize. Rapidly. Through heaving breaths and cries, he pleads (“I’m sorry! I’ll be quiet, I won’t do anything else, I’ll stop doing everything, just please don’t hurt me!”)
Soul‘s jaw tightens and his fists clench in confusion. Heart stopped begging for mercy a long time ago. Loops and loops ago, when there was still a chance to reason with The Soul. What is Heart trying to do? What is this?
{“Don’t do that.”}
(“Do… what?”) Heart asks, voice gentle, and ever so cautious.
There’s a pause.
{“…Make me the villain.”}