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“That’s not fair!” Anakin screeched.
Obi-Wan resisted the urge to pinch his nose against the rising migraine. Arguments with his fifteen-year-old apprentice always ended with a headache. Obi-Wan had almost gotten used to the nearly constant dull ache of one at the base of his skull. But arguing with Anakin never got any easier.
“You deliberately disobeyed me, Anakin. You put yourself in danger, lost your lightsaber, and lied to my face about the whole situation. Tell me what about this makes you think that you don’t deserve some kind of consequence for your actions?” Obi-Wan crossed his arms over his chest.
“If you had just listened to me in the first place…”
“I did listen, Padawan. I told you we couldn’t investigate your suspicions without tipping our hand right then. I didn’t just dismiss everything you thought out of hand.” Obi-Wan met his Padawan’s steely gaze. He could look him in the eye now. An inch more, and Anakin would be taller than him.
Anakin scoffed. “Please, as if you were really going to do anything. If I hadn’t gone in, we never would have found the evidence to convict that sleemo.”
“You don’t know that! Also, if you had gotten caught, you not only could have gotten yourself killed, but you could have gotten the hostages killed, too.”
“I wasn’t caught, and I knew I wasn’t going to be, but you wouldn’t listen,” Anakin spat through gritted teeth.
Obi-Wan sighed heavily. “I don’t think I’m the one who isn’t listening in this situation.”
“As if you don’t love to hear the sound of your own voice,” Anakin snapped.
“I don’t actually enjoy repeating the same things to you over and over again, no,” Obi-Wan shot back, impatience coloring his voice. “You go on and on about how I don’t trust you, how I never listen to your ideas or your insights on a mission, but the truth is you don’t trust me. You don’t trust that maybe, just maybe, having been doing this for a lot longer than you have, I might just have a little bit more knowledge on how to run a mission. You don’t trust that when I tell you to do something, it’s actually for a good reason and not just to annoy you. You don’t trust my judgment enough to obey it and you don’t trust me to actually consider what you suggest, even though I do, and frankly, Anakin, I don’t know how to fix this.”
Anakin looked a little shell-shocked, but his anger rallied him. “So why don’t you just get rid of me then? It’s what you’ve been wanting for years, right? An excuse to give up on me? Get yourself a nice, rule-following Padawan?”
Obi-Wan sighed. “I will not be provoked by you, Anakin.”
“Oh no, the great Obi-Wan Kenobi couldn’t be provoked by anything, could he?” Anakin sneered. “You and I both know I’m the only reason that mission was a success.”
“I don’t know that,” Obi-Wan said sternly, “and neither does the Council because you are grounded for the next four months.”
“Of course you side with the Council! Even if it means I won’t be able to go get a lightsaber crystal for four months or compete in the Padawans’ tournament or keep up with my classwork…”
“That is a consequence of your actions.”
“Bantha-chissk, that’s because you want to hold me back at every opportunity because you can’t stand the thought that I’ll actually surpass you as a Jedi and become what Qui-Gon thought I would be!”
Obi-Wan glared at him. “Anakin…”
“You want to make sure I’m not what he thought so you don’t have to realize that he picked the better Padawan when he picked me.”
Obi-Wan breathed out through his nose, closing his eyes.
“You have to go so far as to sabotage your own Padawan’s training because you’re jealous.”
“Anakin, that’s enough.”
“But maybe I won’t ever become what Qui-Gon thought I would be because I don’t have Qui-Gon training me! Instead I’m stuck with you. It should have been you, not him.”
Obi-Wan’s eyes flew open. “If it had been me instead of him, I would have left you in that junk shop on Tatooine.”
Anakin froze.
Obi-Wan was still glaring at him, entire body taut with angry energy when he realized what he had said. Blood was pulsing in his ears and a dawning understanding of just what exactly he had said…had implied…
His eyes went wide with shock. No, no, what have I done, I didn’t…I…
“Good to know you hate me as much as I hate you.” Anakin turned on his heel and stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him. Obi-Wan exhaled and sat on their small communal couch, head dropping into his hands. He prodded at the bond only to be greeted by shields of solid kyber cutting off the bond.
What had he done?