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Max sits in her yellow rocking chair as she hums with her newborn baby girl, Maya, in her arms.
It had been several days of this—the nonstop sitting in the same rocking chair and holding her newborn for hours on end.
Now that doesnt seem wrong, not to Max herself even. She never got tired of it—even when it was days on end.
It had been a full day she had been wide awake with Maya in her arms, her hands resting on her head as she rocked back and forth.
Max had only gotten up a few times to change the baby, feed the baby, change her on the changing table a few feet away, and to use the bathroom herself.
She hadn’t eaten, she hadn’t changed her clothes, ‘hadn’t brushed her hair or teeth. No qualities stuck out to Max in this moment.
Lucas had thought it was normal for mothers to feel this close to their babies like this, especially a few weeks into having them.
But this? It was numerous days and nights where Max stared into oblivion, looking out the window of her babies nursery without taking care of herself.
Max surprisingly got worked up when someone cared for Maya for too long—even Lucas, or some days she wouldn’t even let anybody hold her at all.
A knock erupted onto the white bedroom door that laid a framed painting of a butterfly—painted by Will.
It stood for new beginnings, new memories that chose forbidden for the old ones. Though, memories continued to haunt the Mayfield girl more than she liked.
The nightmares that erupted from her soul late at night—the fear of losing her baby, her loved ones. It’s something she wouldnt choose ever again.
“Max?” Lucas calls from behind the door. Max hums softly as Lucas opens the door to see his wife rocking slightly on the chair, cradling Maya in her arms as Maya sleeps peacefully.
“Hey, how are you doing?” Lucas asks despite the dark circles under Max’s eyes, her curls now sprawled out and frizzy, still in the same purple striped pajama pants and white tank top that shes worn for 3 days straight.
“Fine.” Max hums softly as she closes her eyes, obviously trying to fight sleep. “I have food for you, my love.” Lucas says softly, an oak tray in his hands that holds lentil soup and a piece of bread to go alongside it.
“Not hungry.” Max says, her eyes still closed as she holds Maya closer to her chest, skin to skin.
Lucas sighs softly as he places the tray on the white dresser, then walks over to Max and his daughter. “Baby.” Lucas says, his hands meeting Max’s hair as he strings his fingers through it.
Max wasn’t one for physical touch, infact she found it repulsive at times. But there was some days where the trauma and memories came back to the young girls mind—uninvited, and a long hug after a long day is just something she needs.
“You need food, then you need a days rest, then you need a massage and a long bath, honey.” Lucas says softly, barely above a whisper. Max hums once again.
“Youve been lying here for days, I know it’s a lot right now, but you need to get up.” Lucas says. Soon, tears begin falling from Max’s eyes onto cheeks.
Lucas is immediately on his knees with a soft kiss to his lovers arm, his hands rubbing her thighs as he shushes her.
“Hey, hey. What’s wrong?” Lucas asks softly. Max continues to cry, her eyes still closed as she turns her head away towards the light of the morning sun.
“I don’t want to let go.” Max sighs softly as Lucas wipes away her tears off her pale flushed cheeks.
“Talk to me, angel.” Lucas coos. “I don’t want to let go of her, Maya. I don’t want her to disappear—to be taken away from me.” Max cries softly.
It was unlike Max to cry, not like this. This was a different reality. The young woman usually only cried when the thoughts of being taken away or her brother being taken away from her carried her through trauma she no longer wanted to endure.
“I know. She’s not going to, Maya is safe with us. Safe in our home, Max. My sweet Max,” Lucas whispers.
“Vecnas gone. Nothings going to hurt you, baby. I promise you.” Lucas continues.
“I won’t leave you, Maya won’t leave us, our sweet puppy won’t leave us,” Lucas says.
Max lets out a small giggle as she opens her eyes, her blue gaze shining with the opening cast of sunlight.
“That dumb dog.” Max snickers softly, tears still trickling down her cheeks as she sniffs. “I thought you loved Chuck.” Lucas frowns with a chuckle. “Chuck is a stupid name, and it’s a stupid dog. You got him off the streets, my light of my life.” Max shakes her head softly.
“So? Can I take her while you eat?” Lucas asks softly. Max smiles at her lover with glossy eyes, then pulls Lucas in for a kiss. It’s an enduring one, one that promises safety rather than capture.
“I’ll take that as a yes?” Lucas says with a grin. Max rolls her eyes playfully as she nods, her arms now numb to the touch of her baby.
Lucas nods as he takes Maya off of Max’s arm, panic immediately setting into the ginger’s body. “Your okay, your okay Max.” Lucas says as he holds Maya gently against his gray t-shirt.
“I’ll stay right here with you while you eat, okay? No rush, honey. You have all day.” Lucas says softly as he sits on the white bed of the nursery.
Max smiles as she grabs the oak tray off the white dresser, picking up the metal spoon, taking soup from her warm bowl and taking a long sip at it with a hum.
“That’s good.” Max sighs as she lays back, smiling. “My mother’s recipe.” Lucas praises himself. “I knew I married a good man. A good man with a good mother.” Max says softly as she struggles to stay awake.
“Hey, hey, I can always save this and you can rest, Max.” Lucas says as he walks over to Maya’s crib to set Maya on the cream orange bedding softly.
Max’s jaw clenches softly at the sight of her baby being so far. “Max,” Lucas calms Max. “You’re okay, I promise. Maya just needs rest, shes okay.” Lucas says softly. “I’m gonna put your food away then I’ll come right back to put you to bed, okay?” Lucas says.
Max groans and shakes her head. “I want to lay down with you, now.” Max says. Lucas chuckles as he walks over to the yellow rocking chair and picks Max up, her legs wrapping around his hips. “I can walk myself, you know?” Max says.
Lucas chuckles. “I bet you could.” He says. Max lays her head in the crook of her husband’s neck, sighing greatly as they make it to the dark bedroom that shes missed dearly.
It’s been days since shes seen this room, since shes spent all her nights in the nursery, cradling Maya till she falls asleep.
Lucas sets Max gently on the bed over the white covers, then begins to walk over to their closet to pick out pajamas of Max.
Lucas grabs a pair of black gym shorts—Lucas’s gym shorts, and a pair of Lucas’s red tank tops. Lucas walks back over to Max to see Max already passed out, snoring softly.
Lucas chuckles as he begins to undress Max, and to carefully take care of her needs before changing her.
After Lucas had changed Max, he had moved him and her to the head of their bed. Just as he was about to get ready to leave the room, a hand pulls him back down to the white covers with a groan.
Lucas giggles softly. “Want you to stay.” Max says. Lucas smiles as he gently climbs into the bed, Max immediately laying on top of him.
“Please don’t ever get tired of me.” Max whispers softly in Lucas’s ear. “I mean, I know you won’t. I won’t let you— but.” Max says. Lucas massages her head, her ginger curls bouncing gently in his hands.
“Max,” Lucas begins with a soft sigh. “I waited for you for two years, been with you for ten. I don’t think I’m getting tired of you any time soon.” He adds.
Max smiles with tears one again filling her eyes, she hated becoming sensitive in moments like this. But when it came to her and Lucas, there was no limit to it.
“Are you ready for me to yell at you when we’re old and gray because I can’t reach stuff anymore?” Max says. Lucas rolls his eyes playfully as he plants a kiss to Max’s lips with a hum.
“So ready for you to yell at me more than you already do.” Lucas giggles. Max kisses Lucas once again. This time, it’s different. It’s longer, it lingers with hope and unspoken words within the time being of the intimacy.
“I won’t ever get tired of it, not for you.” Lucas says. As the morning continues to grow, Lucas continues to whisper little things into Max’s ear as Max falls asleep.
She knew she would be okay. The trauma would come and go every now and then. But she knew deep down her family would never leave her. It would never come to be what the memories left her, injected with wrong truths and voices told her otherwise.
But with the world in her arms, her world, it would all be okay.