Archive of Our Own

The thing about loving Yeonjun was that it happened quietly. Not all at once. Not like the dramatic confessions in movies.

For Beomgyu, it was smaller than that.

It was noticing that whenever he entered a room, his eyes searched for Yeonjun first.

It was saving a seat next to him without thinking.

It was the strange comfort of hearing Yeonjun sigh beside him while studying at 2 a.m.

It was stupid things like memorizing the way Yeonjun frowned when he was concentrating.

And one day Beomgyu realized something terrifying.

He loved him. Badly.

The worst part? Everyone knew.

Well… everyone except Yeonjun.
Or maybe Yeonjun knew. He just never said anything.

🐻🦊

Two years ago

The snow had started falling harder by the time they left the studio. Beomgyu had been quiet all evening which is unusual for him and Yeonjun had noticed but didn't ask. That was their rhythm back then. Yeonjun not asking. Beomgyu not saying.

Until they stopped under the streetlight.

"Hyung."

Yeonjun had been walking ahead, shoulders hunched against the cold, when Beomgyu's voice stopped him.

"What?"

Yeonjun turned. Beomgyu was standing there with snow collecting in his hair, on his eyelashes, on the shoulders of his coat. His cheeks were flushed pink from the cold. His breath came out in small white clouds. And his eyes—those stupidly bright eyes—were looking at Yeonjun like he was something worth looking at.

"I love you."

Yeonjun remembered the way his heart had stopped. Just for a second. Then started beating too fast.

He remembered the panic.

The fear.

The way his hands had gone cold.

Don't say that. You can't say that. If you say that, everything changes, and I don't know how to survive if you change your mind.

"You’re just confused," he'd said, and kept walking.

Behind him, Beomgyu had laughed. Light. Easy. Like it was nothing.

"Okay, hyung."

But Yeonjun had looked back. Just once.

And Beomgyu was still standing there. Snow in his hair. Smile fading.

🐻🦊

Present day

"Hyung."

Beomgyu dropped into the seat next to him in the campus studio, breathless from running.

Yeonjun didn't even look up from his laptop, "Why are you always late?"

Beomgyu grinned. "Because dramatic entrances are important."

Yeonjun snorted quietly.

Beomgyu leaned closer, resting his chin on Yeonjun's shoulder like it was the most natural thing in the world.

"Miss me?"

"Not even a little."

"Liar."

Yeonjun finally glanced at him.

Their faces were closer than they needed to be. For a moment, neither of them moved.

Then Yeonjun pushed his head away lightly. "Stop sticking to me." Beomgyu laughed. But he didn't move far.

He never did.

The thing about Beomgyu was that he loved loudly.

Not confessing. Not exactly.

But he never hid it either.

He said things like:

"I like you the most, hyung."
"If you get a partner, I'll be jealous."
"You're so pretty today it's actually distracting."

He said it jokingly. Playfully. Like it meant nothing.

But sometimes, when Yeonjun looked at him too long, Beomgyu wondered if the truth was showing too clearly.

🐻🦊

"Are you coming tonight?" Beomgyu asked. "To the party."

Yeonjun sighed. "I have work."

"You always have work."

"Unlike you, some of us care about grades."

Beomgyu gasped dramatically. "You're saying I'm stupid?"

"I didn't say that."

"You implied it."

Yeonjun shook his head, trying not to smile. Beomgyu watched him quietly for a moment.

Then he said it again. Like he always did.

Soft. Easy. Almost casual.

"I love you, you know."

Yeonjun froze. Just slightly.

A pause so small most people wouldn't notice. But Beomgyu did.

Third time this month, Beomgyu thought. Third time he'll pretend I didn't say it.

Yeonjun closed his laptop slowly. "You say that to everyone."

Beomgyu tilted his head. "No I don't."

"You said it to Kai last week."

"Because he got me food. That's different."
Yeonjun stood up. "Go bother someone else."

He walked out of the room before Beomgyu could answer.

Outside, the hallway was quiet.

Yeonjun ran a hand through his hair, exhaling slowly. His heart was beating too fast.

Stupid. It was stupid.

Beomgyu didn't mean it like that.

He never did. Right?

Two years.
Two years of "I love you"s thrown around like confetti.
Two years of Beomgyu's eyes following him everywhere.
Two years of pretending not to notice.

Yeonjun leaned against the wall and closed his eyes.

But what if he does mean it? What then?

🐻🦊

Inside the studio, Beomgyu stared at the door Yeonjun just left through. The smile on his face slowly faded. He pulled out his phone. Scrolled through photos. Stopped on one from two years ago.

Snow. Streetlight. Yeonjun walking away.

He remembered that night.

Remembered the way his voice had cracked on the words.

Remembered the way Yeonjun hadn't even turned around.

Beomgyu muttered to himself quietly, "...You're still scared."

He locked his phone. Then forced a smile back onto his face.

Maybe the fourth time's the charm.

🐻🦊

The truth? Yeonjun did know.

That was the problem.

Because if he ever admitted it—

If he ever allowed himself to want Beomgyu back—

He might lose the only person who had ever stayed.

🐻🦊

One year ago

Beomgyu was sick.

Not just a little sick—the kind of sick where you've been in bed for three days, missing classes, surviving on soup that Soobin ordered from a delivery app and texts that Yeonjun barely responded to.

On the third day, there was a knock on his door. Beomgyu groaned, pulling the blanket over his head. "Go away."

The door opened anyway.

"Wow. You look terrible."

Beomgyu's heart stuttered. He peeked out from under the blanket. Yeonjun was standing in his doorway, holding a plastic bag from the pharmacy and looking deeply uncomfortable.

"What are you doing here?"

Yeonjun shrugged, not meeting his eyes. "You weren't answering texts."

"I'm sick."

"I can see that."

Yeonjun walked over and set the bag on the nightstand. Medicine. Cough drops. A bottle of that vitamin drink Beomgyu liked. Yeonjun had remembered which one he liked.

"I brought food too," Yeonjun muttered. "It's in the kitchen. Your brother let me in." Beomgyu stared at him.

Yeonjun finally looked at him. Just for a second. Then away again. "You should sleep more."

"Hyung."

"What?"

"You came all the way here. For me."

Yeonjun's ears turned pink. He pinched Beomgyu's cheeks, glancing around the room, trying not to make eye contact. "I'm nearby."

Liar.

"Daegu? That's nearby?"

Yeonjun just shrugged it off and looked around Beomgyu's bedroom. His bedroom was so him—the way he'd decorated his desk, his shelves, the walls. Yeonjun walked closer to the desk and spotted their friend group photos, along with pictures of Beomgyu's school friends, he guessed. And then he saw it: a photo of him and Beomgyu in a photobooth, taken six months after they first met.

They'd been introduced by Soobin, and somehow, they'd just clicked. Back then, Beomgyu had a round, cheeky face. So did he. Now Beomgyu looked more mature, his jawline sharp and well-defined. Yeonjun smiled at the picture, then glanced back at Beomgyu, who was still in bed but now sitting up cautiously, a soft smile on his face.

"You should've told me. I could've come sooner."

"It's just a fever, hyung."

Yeonjun bit his lip and walked over to the bed again, pressing his hand to Beomgyu's forehead. Hot. He clicked his tongue quickly. "Doesn't seem like it's cooling off anytime soon, Beomgyu-yah."
Beomgyu stayed silent, watching every move Yeonjun made.

Yeonjun's hand was still on his forehead, warm despite Beomgyu's fever. He didn't pull away immediately. His thumb traced a slow arc across Beomgyu's brow, smoothing the furrow there.

"You haven't been sleeping," Yeonjun murmured. It wasn't a question.

Beomgyu's eyes fluttered closed at the touch. "Can't. Too hot. Too cold. Everything at once."

Yeonjun hummed. His hand slid down, cupping Beomgyu's cheek for just a moment before retreating.

"When did you last eat?"

"This morning? Maybe? Soobin sent soup but—" Beomgyu gestured vaguely at the nightstand, where a half-empty container sat abandoned.

Yeonjun frowned. He picked up the container, peered inside, then set it down with a decisive click. "That's not enough. I'll heat up the food I brought. You're eating properly this time."

"Hyung, you don't have to—"

"I know I don't have to."

The words hung in the air. 

He disappeared into the kitchen, and Beomgyu heard him rummaging around, opening cabinets, muttering under his breath when he couldn't find bowls. It was such a domestic sound—Yeonjun in his kitchen, Yeonjun making him food—that Beomgyu had to close his eyes again, overwhelmed.

When Yeonjun came back, he was carrying a tray. Actual soup in an actual bowl. Some side dishes Beomgyu didn't recognize. A glass of water. The vitamin drink, already opened with a straw inside.

"Sit up properly," Yeonjun instructed, setting the tray on the nightstand. He grabbed an extra pillow from the floor and tucked it behind Beomgyu's back without asking. His movements were efficient, practiced—like he'd done this before.

Which he hadn't.

"I can eat by myself," Beomgyu said, even as Yeonjun was already lifting the spoon.

"I know you can."

"Then why—"

Yeonjun blew on the soup. Actually blew on it, like Beomgyu was a child, his breath gentle and careful. Then he held the spoon to Beomgyu's lips.

Beomgyu's heart stopped.

"Open," Yeonjun said quietly.

"I—hyung—"

"You'll spill."

Beomgyu opened his mouth. The soup was perfect—warm, savory, exactly the right temperature. Yeonjun watched him swallow, then nodded, satisfied, and scooped another spoonful.

They didn't speak. Yeonjun fed him spoonful by spoonful, occasionally wiping Beomgyu's chin with a napkin when some dribbled down. His touch was impossibly gentle. His eyes never left Beomgyu's face—checking, always checking, making sure he was okay.

Halfway through the bowl, Beomgyu's eyes started burning. Not from the soup.

"Hyung."

"Mm?"

"Why are you doing this?"

Yeonjun's hand paused mid-air. The spoon hovered between them, steam curling upward. For a long moment, he didn't answer. Then he set the spoon down carefully and looked at Beomgyu—really looked at him, for the first time since he'd arrived.

"Because you needed someone," he said quietly. "And I should have been that person three days ago."

Beomgyu's breath caught.

Yeonjun reached out and tucked a strand of damp hair behind Beomgyu's ear. His fingers lingered there, brushing against Beomgyu's temple, "I'm sorry I wasn't."

The words were so soft Beomgyu almost missed them. But he didn't. He felt them settle in his chest, warm and aching and too much.

"It's okay," Beomgyu whispered. "You're here now."

Yeonjun's eyes did something complicated—flickering between relief and guilt and something else, something deeper that he quickly looked away from.

"Yeah," he said, clearing his throat. "Yeah, I'm here."

He picked up the spoon again, "Now finish this before it gets cold. And then you're taking your medicine. And then—" He hesitated. "And then I can stay until you fall asleep. If you want."

Beomgyu's heart was going to give out. Actually give out.

"I want," he said immediately. Too immediately. He felt his own cheeks flush despite the fever.

Yeonjun's lips twitched—not quite a smile, but close. "Okay."

Later, after the medicine was taken and the tray was cleared and Beomgyu was tucked back under his blankets like a burrito, Yeonjun sat on the edge of the bed. Not leaving. True to his word. He pulled out his phone, scrolling through something, but every few minutes his eyes would drift to Beomgyu. Checking. Always checking.

"You should go home," Beomgyu mumbled, half-asleep. "It's late."

"I'm nearby, remember?"

Beomgyu snorted weakly. "Bullshit."

Yeonjun didn't deny it this time. Instead, he reached out and smoothed Beomgyu's blanket up to his chin, tucking him in further. "Sleep," he murmured.

"Stay?" The word slipped out before Beomgyu could stop it. 

Small. Vulnerable. Wanting.

Yeonjun was quiet for a moment. Then he shifted, leaning back against the headboard, his thigh pressing warm against Beomgyu's shoulder through the blanket.

"I'm not going anywhere."

Beomgyu's eyes fluttered closed. Under the blanket, his hand moved, just slightly—until his fingers brushed against Yeonjun's.

Yeonjun went still.

Then, slowly, carefully, he turned his hand over and let Beomgyu's fingers slip between his.

Neither of them said anything.

Neither of them needed to.

It's the next morning when Yeonjun had to leave because he had class—after making sure Beomgyu took his medicine again, after awkwardly patting his head once, after lingering in the doorway like he wanted to say something else—Beomgyu pressed his face into the pillow and smiled.

Even if it was just friends.

Even if it would always be just friends.

Or at least, that's what Yeonjun had always believed.

At least Yeonjun came.

🐻🦊

Present day

The apartment was louder than it had any right to be.

Someone had turned the speakers up too much, the bass thumping through the floor while laughter and shouting mixed with the music. Empty cups were already scattered around the coffee table, and the living room lights had been dimmed just enough to make everything feel hazy.

In the middle of it all, their circle had taken over the floor.

"Okay wait, wait—this is unfair," Soobin complained, holding up both hands. "Why are we playing games that require running when half of us are already tipsy?"

Kai pointed at him immediately. "You're just saying that because you're slow."

"I'm not slow!"

"You absolutely are."

Beomgyu laughed loudly from the couch, nearly falling sideways as he pointed between them. "He's right though, hyung. If we do anything physical, you're losing immediately."

Soobin looked personally offended. "You're supposed to be on my side!"

"Why?"

"Because we're friends!"

Beomgyu grinned. "Friends don't lie to each other."

clapped his hands once. "Can we start already?"

They ended up splitting into teams.

Kai grabbed Beomgyu's sleeve immediately.

"You're with us."

"Us?"

Kai pointed to Soobin. "Me and him."

Beomgyu blinked. "That feels like a disadvantage."

"HEY—"

But Beomgyu just laughed and sat down beside them on the carpet.

Across the room, Taehyun casually dropped down next to Yeonjun.

"Guess it's us then, hyung."

Yeonjun shrugged and smiled, one shoulder already slipping slightly out of the oversized cardigan he had thrown on earlier, "Fine by me."

🐻🦊

From the outside, it looked like chaos.

Kai yelling.
Soobin arguing.
Taehyun calmly correcting rules.

But to Beomgyu, everything blurred a little.

Because across the room— Yeonjun was there.

And somehow the space between them felt louder than everything else.

🐻🦊

"Okay the rule is simple," Taehyun explained patiently. "You have to guess the song in three seconds."

Kai groaned. "That's impossible!"

"Skill issue."

"Taehyun, you're literally a music encyclopedia."

"Again," Taehyun said calmly, "skill issue."
Beomgyu laughed, leaning back on his hands. "Hyung you better not embarrass our team."

Soobin looked determined. "I will carry us."
Kai snorted. "You can't even carry groceries."

The room erupted in laughter.

Even Yeonjun laughed.

Beomgyu felt it like a spark somewhere in his chest.

Because Yeonjun's laugh— He would recognize it anywhere.

🐻🦊

The game started. Songs blasted through the speakers for a few seconds at a time.

Kai kept shouting wrong answers.
Soobin dramatically celebrated every correct one.
Taehyun kept winning.
Beomgyu mostly just laughed.

But every few moments— His eyes drifted across the room.

And every time— Yeonjun was already looking at him.

It wasn't obvious. Not to anyone else. They both still laughed with the others. Still argued about the game. Still teased.

But there was something else too. A strange pull. Like the room was full of people but somehow the light kept landing only on them.

Their eyes meeting.

Looking away.

Meeting again.

Suddenly—

"Beomgyu hyung, focus!" Kai shouted.

"What?"

"The song!"

"Oh—uh—"

The music cut off.

Taehyun answered immediately.

Kai groaned loudly. "You're useless!"

Beomgyu laughed. "Sorry, I was distracted."

Across the room, Yeonjun raised an eyebrow and couldn’t help but hide his smile.

Distracted by what? But he didn't ask.

He never asked.

🐻🦊

After a while the game dissolved into smaller conversations. People getting drinks. Someone changing the music. The noise softened into comfortable chaos.

Yeonjun quietly slipped out of the circle and walked toward the kitchen counter. He grabbed a cup and poured himself another drink. The cool air near the open window brushed against his neck.

He didn't notice footsteps behind him.

But he did notice the scent.

Familiar. Warm. The faint perfume Beomgyu always wore.

So he said casually, without turning around, "Drink?"

A second later Beomgyu stepped beside him. He leaned back against the edge of the kitchen table, one hip resting against it while one hand braced behind him on the tabletop for support. The position made him look relaxed, slightly angled toward Yeonjun.

"Not really," he said.

Yeonjun glanced sideways.

Beomgyu shrugged. "Just following you, hyung."

Yeonjun snorted softly and took a sip of his drink.

For a moment neither of them spoke.

The party noise continued behind them. Distant. Blurry.

Beomgyu broke the silence first. "You said you wouldn't come tonight."

Yeonjun swirled the drink in his cup. "Yeah."

"So what happened?"

Yeonjun shrugged. "Needed to clear my head."

Beomgyu tilted his head. "From what?"
"From you guys annoying me later when you're all drunk."

Beomgyu gasped dramatically. "That's hurtful."

"You're dramatic."

"You love it."

Yeonjun rolled his eyes. "Unfortunately."

Beomgyu grinned.

They both laughed. For a moment it felt easy again. Normal.

Like every other moment they'd shared over the years.

But when the laughter faded—
The quiet came back.

Beomgyu turned his head slightly. And really looked at Yeonjun. His hair was messy from earlier, strands falling over his forehead. The cardigan he wore had slipped lower on one shoulder. The cold air from the open window brushed against his neck.

Yeonjun shivered a little. Just slightly.

Most people wouldn't notice. But Beomgyu always did.

He sighed quietly. Then pushed himself off the table. "Come here."

Yeonjun frowned. "What—"

Before he could finish, Beomgyu gently pulled the cardigan back up onto Yeonjun's shoulder.

His fingers lingered briefly against the fabric. "You're cold," Beomgyu said simply. Then he shrugged off his own jacket and draped it over Yeonjun's shoulders too.

The fabric was still warm.

Yeonjun blinked. "You don't have to—"
"You'll complain later if you get sick."

Beomgyu stepped closer. Close enough that Yeonjun could see the small crease near his eyes when he focused.
Without thinking, Beomgyu reached up and lightly brushed his fingers through Yeonjun's hair, fixing the messy strands.

"There."

The moment stretched. The party noise felt very far away.

Because Yeonjun was staring at him. Not casually. Not jokingly.

Just… staring.

Beomgyu felt it.

That gaze. Heavy. Warm.

Almost confused.

And then he heard it.

A quiet intake of breath.

Like Yeonjun had forgotten to breathe for a second. Beomgyu's hand stilled for a moment near his hair.

Their eyes met.

And something in Yeonjun's expression shifted—
Soft. Vulnerable. Like this moment meant something to him too.

Beomgyu's chest tightened slightly.

Don't look at me like that, he thought. Not unless you mean it.

But he just smiled like he always did. Light. Easy. Like none of it mattered.

"Don't look at me like that," he teased.

Yeonjun blinked. "Like what?"

Beomgyu shrugged. "Like I just saved your life or something."

Yeonjun looked away first. But the faint pink in his ears gave him away.

Behind them someone yelled.

"HEY—WHERE DID YOU TWO GO?"

Kai's voice.

Soobin immediately added, "Beomgyu you abandoned your team!"

Taehyun shouted from the couch, "They were losing anyway!"

Beomgyu laughed. Then glanced back at Yeonjun.

"You ready to go back before they accuse us of cheating somehow?"

Yeonjun adjusted the jacket on his shoulders. Beomgyu's jacket. Still warm.
He nodded slowly. "Yeah."

But as they walked back toward the living room—
Their shoulders brushed once. Just briefly.

And neither of them moved away.

🐻🦊

The music had gotten louder.
Or maybe Yeonjun's head was just louder.

Either way, the apartment felt warmer now, bodies filling the space, laughter overlapping in every corner. Someone had switched the playlist to something louder, something with a heavy beat that made the floor vibrate faintly under his shoes.

Yeonjun stood near the hallway entrance, drink still in hand. He had come back from the kitchen with Beomgyu earlier.

Except somewhere between the living room and the hallway, they had split again. Beomgyu had gotten pulled away by someone. And Yeonjun hadn't followed.

At first he didn't think much of it. Beomgyu talked to everyone. Beomgyu laughed with everyone. That was just how Beomgyu was. A sunshine.

But then—

He noticed them. Across the room.

Beomgyu and some guy Yeonjun didn't recognize. The guy stood closer than most people usually did. Close enough that their shoulders almost brushed. He leaned down slightly while talking, voice probably low to cut through the music.

Yeonjun couldn't hear what they were saying.

Not a single word.

But he saw the way the guy leaned into Beomgyu's space.

And the way Beomgyu tilted his head up to listen.

Then Beomgyu laughed.

That soft laugh.

The one that creased the corner of his eyes.

He's not like this with everyone, a voice whispered in Yeonjun's head. You know that.

And he did know.

He knew Beomgyu was actually more closed off. More guarded. That the bright, loud personality was real, but it wasn't everything.

So why did Beomgyu look so comfortable with that person?

Something unpleasant twisted in Yeonjun's chest.

Before he even realized what he was doing, he shifted slightly behind the edge of the wall near the hallway, out of direct sight. It wasn't hiding. Not really.

Just… standing where Beomgyu wouldn't immediately notice him. Just long enough to maybe catch a word or two.

But the music was too loud.

And the distance too far.

All Yeonjun saw was the way the other guy leaned closer and the way Beomgyu smiled.

He smiles at everyone, Yeonjun told himself.

Then why does it bother you so much?

He looked away first. "Whatever," he muttered under his breath.

Then he turned and walked back toward the couch.

Kai was halfway through some exaggerated story when Yeonjun dropped onto the couch.

"—and then Soobin hyung just stood there—"

"I did not!" Soobin protested immediately.

"You absolutely did!"

Taehyun sighed. "You both sound ridiculous."

Kai pointed accusingly. "You weren't even there!"

"I heard enough to know you're exaggerating."

Yeonjun forced a laugh and leaned back into the couch. "Soobin freezing in fear sounds believable though."

"I was not freezing!"

"You were, hyung."

"I was thinking!"

Kai leaned over dramatically toward Yeonjun. "See? Even Yeonjun agrees."

Yeonjun gasped and raised his hands in surrender. "I didn't say anything."

"That means you agree, hyung."

Yeonjun shook his head and chuckled. "That's not how that works."

The conversation kept moving. The jokes kept flying.

But Yeonjun's thoughts kept drifting back to the hallway.

Who was that guy?

A friend?

Someone from class?

Someone Beomgyu knew that Yeonjun didn't?

His fingers unconsciously ruffled through his hair. Then he noticed something else.

The jacket.

Still around his shoulders.

Beomgyu's jacket.

He pulled it tighter around himself without thinking. The fabric still smelled faintly like Beomgyu.

Warm. Familiar.

And for some reason that only made the twisting feeling worse.

A sudden weight dropped onto the couch beside him.

Hard.

"Darling."

Yeonjun looked over, "Oh."

It was Wooyoung.

"Don't say it so disappointedly."

"Whatever you're saying darling, because I'm not."

Wooyoung leaned back dramatically like he had just completed a marathon. "I think someone spiked the punch."

Yeonjun raised an eyebrow. "You've had like five drinks."

"That's not a lot."

"That's definitely a lot."

Wooyoung turned his head slowly toward him. "You sound judgmental."

"I'm being realistic."

Wooyoung squinted at him. "You look weird."

"Thanks."

"No, I mean it," Wooyoung continued, poking his arm. "You look like you're thinking too hard."

"I'm not."

"You are."

"I'm really not."

Wooyoung stared at him for a moment longer. Then nodded seriously. "Okay."

Pause.

"Who are we glaring at?"

Yeonjun choked slightly on his drink. "I'm not glaring at anyone."

Wooyoung followed his earlier line of sight anyway.

"Oh," He grinned immediately. "That guy?"

Yeonjun frowned. "What guy?"

"The one talking to Beomgyu."

Yeonjun forced his shoulders to relax. "I wasn't looking."

Wooyoung hummed knowingly. "Sure."

Wooyoung followed Yeonjun's gaze again. The guy apparently was still talking to Beomgyu. Still standing too close. Still making Beomgyu laugh.

Wooyoung said thoughtfully, "if you stared any harder, you might actually burn a hole through him."

Yeonjun tore his gaze away. "Oh god! I'm not staring!"

"You're definitely staring."

"I'm looking."

"Oh, now you're looking? And it's been, like, what, 15 minutes? Without blinking?"

Yeonjun drained his drink. "No, it's not been 15 minutes. Plus, he's standing where I can see him! It's a small apartment."

Wooyoung snorted. "Sure. That's definitely the reason."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

Wooyoung just grinned and patted his knee. "Nothing, darling. Absolutely nothing."

Before Yeonjun could respond—

A hand landed gently on his shoulder.

Warm. Familiar.

Yeonjun looked up.

And there he was.

Beomgyu. Choi Beomgyu.

Standing just behind the couch, looking down at him with those soft eyes.
And smiling.

That stupid beautiful smile.

"Wanna head home?" Beomgyu asked casually.

Yeonjun blinked. Then tilted his head slightly, glancing around the living room.

"What about the others?"

Beomgyu shrugged. "Soobin hyung said he wants to stay for a bit."

He absentmindedly reached down and started playing with Yeonjun's hair, fingers brushing lightly through the strands.
"Kai and Taehyun said they'll keep him company."

Then Beomgyu leaned a little closer and pinched Yeonjun's cheek lightly.

Yeonjun frowned. "What was that for?"

Beomgyu didn't answer immediately.

Instead he glanced sideways at Wooyoung, who was now slumped dramatically against the couch.

Beomgyu looked amused.

Then he looked back down at Yeonjun.

"How many drinks has he had?"

Wooyoung raised a finger weakly. "I can hear you."

Beomgyu laughed quietly.

His eyes crinkled slightly when he smiled like that.

And Yeonjun suddenly felt very aware of how close he was.

Without thinking, Yeonjun reached up and grabbed Beomgyu's hand. The one still resting on his shoulder. He turned it over casually and started fiddling with Beomgyu's fingers absentmindedly.

"Don't know," Yeonjun said. "Found him already like this."

Wooyoung accusingly. "You're supposed to defend me."

Yeonjun ignored him.

For a moment Beomgyu didn't pull his hand away. He just watched Yeonjun quietly. Something soft flickered in his eyes

Two years, Beomgyu thought. Two years of this. Two years of you holding my hand without thinking. Two years of you looking at me like that when you think I'm not paying attention.

What will it take for you to stop being scared?

Then Yeonjun suddenly stood up. Letting Beomgyu's hand slip from his, "Let's go."

Beomgyu blinked once. Then smiled again. "Okay."

Behind them Wooyoung groaned dramatically. "Wow. Just abandon me like that."

Kai shouted from across the room. "He'll survive!"

Taehyun added dryly, "Unfortunately."

Soobin waved lazily from the kitchen. "Text when you get home!"

Yeonjun barely heard any of it.

Because as he walked toward the door—
He couldn't stop thinking about that guy earlier. The one standing too close to Beomgyu. The one who made Beomgyu laugh.

Why does it matter?

Why do I care?

He didn't have an answer.

Or maybe he did.

Maybe he just wasn't ready to say it out loud.

🐻🦊

The night outside was colder than either of them expected.

The apartment door shut behind them with a dull click, and suddenly the music from the party became muffled, fading into the background like something distant and unimportant.

Now it was just the street. Quiet sidewalks. The faint buzz of streetlights. And the wind. It brushed past them in slow waves, carrying the chill of late night air.

For a while, neither of them spoke.

Their footsteps echoed softly against the pavement as they walked side by side.

Not too close. Not too far. Just close enough that their shoulders brushed every few steps.

Beomgyu noticed the way Yeonjun pulled the jacket tighter around himself.

His jacket.

The sleeves were slightly too long on Yeonjun, the fabric bunching around his hands.

Beomgyu glanced at him briefly. "You cold?"
Yeonjun shook his head. "I'm fine."

The wind blew again. Yeonjun shivered.

Beomgyu sighed quietly. Without saying anything, he stepped slightly closer so their shoulders touched more steadily.

A silent way of sharing warmth.

It was something he did often.

Something Yeonjun never commented on. But never moved away from either.

The silence between them wasn't uncomfortable.

Not exactly.

But tonight it felt… heavier. Like something was sitting just beneath the surface. Waiting.

They walked past a quiet convenience store.

A stray cat darted across the street.

The sound of distant cars hummed somewhere far away.

And Yeonjun's thoughts refused to stay quiet. Because all he could see in his mind was that moment earlier. That guy leaning close to Beomgyu.

Beomgyu smiling. Laughing. Looking comfortable. Looking… happy.

He's always happy, Yeonjun thought.

He doesn't need me to be happy.

He could have anyone.

Why does he keep choosing me?

Before he could stop himself— Yeonjun spoke.

"You should've brought someone home today."

Beomgyu blinked.

Yeonjun kept walking, hands in his pockets. "Had fun instead of being with me."

Beomgyu frowned immediately and looked up at him. "…what?"

Yeonjun smiled faintly.

The kind of smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "You know what I mean."

He shrugged casually, "Party. Fun."

Then he glanced sideways. "Why didn't you mingle more?"

Beomgyu's steps slowed. Then stopped completely.

For a moment Yeonjun walked two steps ahead before noticing. He turned slightly.
Beomgyu was looking at him.

Confused. Hurt. Something else too.

Then Beomgyu resumed walking, catching up beside him.

Tilting his head slightly. "Because I don't want to?"

Yeonjun scoffed lightly. A quiet laugh leaving his lips. "Well," he said, "it does seem like you have someone you're interested in."

The moment the words left his mouth—

He felt a tug.

Beomgyu had grabbed his wrist. Not harsh. But firm enough to stop him.

Yeonjun looked down at their hands.

Then slowly up at Beomgyu.

Beomgyu's fingers tightened slightly around his wrist.

"What are you implying, hyung?"

His voice wasn't angry. Just careful.

Yeonjun sighed. A tired sound. "What are you doing here with me, Beomgyu-yah?"

Beomgyu's eyebrows knit together. "What?"

But before Beomgyu could say anything else— Yeonjun continued. His voice quieter now. "Shouldn't you have fun with someone else?"

The wind moved through the empty street again.

Yeonjun looked down for a moment before meeting Beomgyu's eyes.

"Someone you could really pour your heart into."

His voice softened even more.

"Someone who could accept all of you."

A pause.

"Someone willing to give all of themselves to you."

For a second— Beomgyu just stared at him. Like he was trying to understand something complicated. Like he was looking for the right answer to a question he didn't know how to solve.

Then he shook his head slowly. "I don't understand where all of this is coming from."

Yeonjun let out a breath that almost sounded like a laugh. "Nevermind."

He tried to pull his wrist free. Tried to keep walking.

But Beomgyu grabbed him again. Faster this time.

"You know it already."

Yeonjun froze.

Beomgyu's voice had changed. Softer. But steadier too.

"You're the one who knows me the best."

Beomgyu's grip loosened slightly, but he didn't let go.

"You already know what I'm thinking most of the time." His voice dropped.

"You know what I like."

"What I don't."

Beomgyu exhaled slowly. "This… this thing." He gestured vaguely between them.

"My behavior right now."

Then his eyes met Yeonjun's.

"It's only towards you, hyung."

"Only you."

Yeonjun's breath caught slightly.

Because Beomgyu's eyes— They looked different. Not playful. Not teasing. There was something else there tonight.

Something intense. Like a storm sitting quietly behind them. Felt like Beomgyu was giving up on something.

Or maybe finally saying something he had kept buried for too long.

Beomgyu swallowed. Then continued, "If this is another way of yours to reject me…"

He forced a small smile. "…then I get it."

Yeonjun's heart dropped.

Beomgyu looked down briefly.

"I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable all this time."

His voice grew quieter. "By following you around."

The wind brushed through his hair, pushing strands into his eyes. But he didn't move.

"I didn't ask for you to reciprocate."

His fingers loosened around Yeonjun's wrist completely now, "I never wanted you to do that by force."

He looked back up.

And Yeonjun hated the way his chest tightened at the sight of him.

"I just like being around you." Beomgyu's voice was barely above a whisper now.

"I like taking care of you."

"I like walking you home."

"I like fixing your hair when it gets messy."

A small laugh escaped him. Even though it sounded a little sad.

"You always pretend you don't notice."

Yeonjun didn't move. Didn't speak.

Beomgyu rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "I don't care if you never like me back."

His eyes softened. "As long as I can keep being around you."

"That's enough for me."

The street fell quiet again. Just the wind moving through the empty night. And two people standing under a dim streetlight.

Yeonjun looked at Beomgyu. Really looked at him.

At the way his shoulders had tensed. The way his hands were slightly clenched now like he regretted saying too much.

And suddenly— Yeonjun realized something terrifying.

Beomgyu had never been subtle.

Not really.

Yeonjun had just pretended not to see it.

Two years ago. Snow. Streetlight. "I love you."

You said it first. You've been saying it all along.

And I've been running.

His chest hurt.

Because if Beomgyu ever stopped looking at him like that— Yeonjun didn't know what he would do.

🐻🦊

The wind passed through the empty street again.

Cold.

Restless.

The kind of wind that slipped through sleeves and collars no matter how tightly someone wrapped their jacket around themselves.

Neither of them had moved.

Beomgyu still stood in front of Yeonjun, the distance between them only a few steps, the tension hanging in the air like something fragile that might break if either of them spoke too quickly.

Beomgyu's words still lingered there.

I just like being around you.

That's enough for me.

Yeonjun didn't know what to do with that. Didn't know what to do with the way his chest felt suddenly tight. Beomgyu waited for Yeonjun to say something. Anything.

The wind moved between them. Cold. Empty.

This is it, Beomgyu thought. This is where he finally tells me to stop.

And maybe that would be a relief. Maybe if Yeonjun said it clearly—I don't want this, I don't want you, please stop—then Beomgyu could finally let go. Could finally stop hoping. Could finally move on.

He didn't want to move on. No. Not yet.

"Hyung," he started, "if you want me to—"

"Beomgyu-yah."

Yeonjun's voice was strange. Not cold. Not dismissive. Something else.

Something Beomgyu didn't recognize.

And then Yeonjun's phone rang.

The sound cut through the quiet like something sharp.

Both of them blinked.

Yeonjun pulled his phone out of his pocket, glancing down at the screen. "Sorry," he muttered automatically.

He stepped a few feet away, answering the call, "Hello?"

Beomgyu stayed where he was. Hands tucked into his jacket pockets. Watching the street instead. Listening to Yeonjun's quiet voice in the background.

The conversation sounded brief.

Soft.

Yeonjun spoke in a language Beomgyu didn't fully catch in the wind, his tone relaxed but attentive.

Beomgyu kicked a small pebble on the sidewalk.

He tried not to think about the conversation they had just had.

Tried not to replay the look on Yeonjun's face when he said those things.

Tried not to feel stupid.

But the thoughts kept coming anyway.

Maybe he had said too much.

Maybe Yeonjun was uncomfortable now.

Maybe—

Two years.

Two years of this.

How much longer can you do this, Beomgyu?

He didn't have an answer.

🐻🦊

The call ended.

Yeonjun walked back toward him. Sliding his phone back into his pocket. "Sorry," he said again. "Someone from back home called."

Beomgyu nodded immediately, offering a small smile. "It's fine."

Then he lightly tilted his head toward the street ahead. "Let's head home now."

They started walking again. The silence between them was softer now.

Still heavy but less sharp.

The closer they got to Yeonjun's apartment building, the quieter the streets became. Most lights in the surrounding buildings had already turned off.

The air felt colder. Beomgyu kept glancing at Yeonjun every now and then.

Making sure he still had the jacket wrapped properly around his shoulders.

🐻🦊

Eventually they reached the building.

Yeonjun stopped at the entrance, fishing his keys out of his pocket.

Beomgyu lingered a step behind him.
Watching.

Like he always did.

Yeonjun unlocked the door and pushed it open.

The warm light from inside the hallway spilled onto the sidewalk.

He stepped halfway through.

Then paused.

Turning the knob slightly as he held the door open.

He looked back.

Beomgyu was already stepping away.

Hands raised slightly in an awkward wave. Smiling that soft, familiar smile.

"Alright," he said lightly. "See you, Yeonjunnie."

But before he could turn completely— "Beomgyu-yah."

Beomgyu stopped. He turned back.

Yeonjun was still standing in the doorway. One hand on the door. Looking at him.

Then he said it casually. "Do you want to come inside?"

Beomgyu's brain stopped working for a moment. "What?"

Yeonjun nodded slightly toward the apartment behind him. "It's cold outside."

Beomgyu blinked. Still trying to process the sentence.

Because— This hyung. This same hyung who had just rejected him ten minutes ago on the street. Was now inviting him inside like nothing had happened.

Like he didn't just tell me to go find someone else.

Like he doesn't know what he does to me.

Beomgyu stared at the open doorway. At Yeonjun standing there like this was the most normal thing in the world. And his thoughts spiraled.

Is this a good idea?

Why would he invite me in after that?

Does he not realize what he just said to me?

Or worse—

Does he realize and still doesn't care?

Beomgyu rubbed the back of his neck. Part of him wanted to say no. Part of him wanted to walk away before he embarrassed himself further. Because if he stayed around Yeonjun too long— He would keep falling deeper. And deeper. And deeper.

But the truth was simpler.

He had never been good at saying no to Yeonjun. Never. And maybe that made him pathetic.

Actually—No. He knew it made him pathetic.

Pathetic for this hyung who could say things that shattered his heart and still make him want to stay.

Four times, Beomgyu thought. Four times you've said "I love you" and watched him walk away.

And you're still here.

What does that make you?

Yeonjun spoke again when Beomgyu didn't answer. "It's not like you haven't been here before."

His tone softened slightly, "Come in."

Beomgyu let out a quiet huff of laughter. Then nodded. "Alright."

He stepped forward slowly. "Yeah."

As he walked past Yeonjun and into the warm hallway, he added lightly—

"Thank you for having me around."

Yeonjun snorted immediately. A small, incredulous sound.

Beomgyu turned red instantly. "Shut up."

Yeonjun shrugged, closing the door behind them. "You're the one who said it like a guest at a hotel."

"I was being polite."

"You sounded weird."

"You're weird."

Yeonjun smirked slightly. "Takes one to know one."

Beomgyu rolled his eyes.

But the tension in his shoulders had eased just a little.

Just enough for the familiar rhythm between them to return.

🐻🦊

Yeonjun slipped his shoes off near the entrance.

Beomgyu did the same automatically. Like he had done a hundred times before.

Which… he probably had.

The apartment was quiet. Dim. Warm compared to the cold outside.

Yeonjun tossed his keys onto the table and stretched his arms slightly.

Then glanced back at Beomgyu. "You want tea?"

Beomgyu blinked. "You're making tea at this hour?"

"You complain if I offer alcohol."

"That's because you drink terrible alcohol."

"You drink worse."

Beomgyu scoffed. "That's not true."

"It absolutely is."

Yeonjun walked toward the kitchen anyway.

Beomgyu followed a few steps behind.

Watching him move around the apartment so comfortably.

Like this was the most natural place for him to be.

And suddenly Beomgyu felt something ache quietly in his chest.

Because this— Standing in Yeonjun's kitchen. Arguing about stupid things. Watching him move around in his own space— This was exactly the kind of moment that made him fall for Yeonjun in the first place.

Yeonjun turned back suddenly.

Catching Beomgyu staring. "What?"

Beomgyu blinked. Then looked away quickly. "Nothing."

Yeonjun narrowed his eyes slightly. "You're acting weird tonight."

Beomgyu laughed awkwardly. "You rejected me thirty minutes ago."

Yeonjun froze.

Beomgyu immediately groaned. "Okay that came out wrong."

But Yeonjun didn't laugh. Didn't tease.

He just stood there quietly. Looking at him. Like he was thinking about something he didn't know how to say out loud.

And the silence between them returned. Heavier than before.

🐻🦊

The kettle had already gone quiet. Steam still curled lazily above the mugs on the counter, the faint scent of tea filling the small kitchen.

Neither of them had moved for a while.

Beomgyu leaned against the counter on the opposite side, arms loosely crossed, watching Yeonjun from across the space.

Yeonjun stood by the stove. Back turned. Both hands wrapped around the warm mug.

The silence between them wasn't the comfortable kind they usually had.

It felt… careful.

Fragile. Like one wrong word could shatter something.

Yeonjun stared into the cup. Watching the tea swirl slowly as he moved the mug slightly in his hands.

Then he said it.

Quietly.

"I saw you with the other guy."

Beomgyu blinked. "…other guy?"

Yeonjun didn't turn around. He just kept swirling the tea, like the motion helped him keep his composure.

The sound of the ceramic mug lightly tapping the counter filled the quiet kitchen.

Beomgyu frowned slightly. "As far as I know," he said slowly, "there's no other guy I was talking to today."

Yeonjun exhaled. A tired sound, "You know what," he muttered, "nevermind."

He lifted the mug to take a sip— But footsteps moved closer.

Beomgyu stopped right behind him. Close enough that Yeonjun could feel the warmth of him at his back.

"No," Beomgyu said softly. "Tell me. When was this?"

Yeonjun stared straight ahead. Still refusing to turn around.

"When we got separated." His voice was calm. Too calm.

"After those guys called out that we ditched them."

Silence.

Then suddenly— Beomgyu's fingers wrapped gently around Yeonjun's wrist.

Not tight.

Just enough to stop the nervous movement of the cup.

"Turn around."

Yeonjun didn't move.

"Hyung."

Beomgyu's voice softened, "Turn around."

Slowly— Yeonjun turned.

But even then, his gaze stayed slightly lowered. Not meeting Beomgyu's eyes.

Beomgyu stared at him for a moment. Then a quiet laugh escaped him.

"You're being so difficult right now."

Yeonjun frowned slightly.
Beomgyu tilted his head, "Look at me."

When Yeonjun still didn't— Beomgyu added softly, "…please?"

That was what made Yeonjun look up.
Because Beomgyu rarely sounded like that.

So earnest. So sincere.

And the moment their eyes met— Yeonjun felt something twist painfully in his chest.

Beomgyu spoke gently, "His name is Sungchan."

Yeonjun blinked.

Beomgyu continued. "He's not 'the other guy.'"

A small smile tugged at his lips. "And there is no other guy."

He shrugged slightly, "We're just friends."

Then Beomgyu looked away briefly, scratching the back of his neck, "He came up to tease me actually."

Yeonjun frowned. "Tease you?"

Beomgyu nodded. "Yeah."

Then he glanced back at Yeonjun with a small grin.

"He said the way I act around you is embarrassing."

A pause.

"Like a puppy."

Yeonjun's heart skipped. Then immediately started beating faster. His ears burned slightly.

Beomgyu noticed.

Of course he did.

He smiled a little.

Then looked away again.

Dropping his hand from Yeonjun's wrist.

"If I didn't know better," he said lightly, "I'd think you were jealous."

The words were playful but the smile on Beomgyu's face didn't quite reach his eyes.

And suddenly Yeonjun's chest hurt.

Because that smile— It looked tired.

Like Beomgyu had already accepted something painful.

Two years, Yeonjun thought. Two years of this. Two years of me pushing. Two years of him staying. How much longer before he stops?

"I never said I rejected you." The words slipped out quickly.

Almost desperate.

Beomgyu's head snapped back toward him.

For a moment neither of them spoke.

But something had changed.

The air felt heavier now. More honest.

Yeonjun stepped closer.

Close enough that Beomgyu could see the faint redness around his eyes.

"You know me so well too," Yeonjun said quietly.

"You should've known by now."

His voice softened. "That what I'm feeling… or doing…"

He swallowed, "…is only towards you too."

Beomgyu stared at him. Long. Carefully.

Like he was afraid this moment might disappear if he blinked.

This hyung finally being truthful to himself.

Two years.

Two years of waiting for you to stop running.

Two years of saying "I love you" and watching you walk away.

And now you're here. Looking at me like that.

Like you're finally ready to stay.

Yeonjun continued slowly. "You once asked me what I was so scared of."

He laughed softly, reminded back to where once they were mere inches apart yet he pulled his face to the side and Beomgyu's hand still on his cheek asked dejectedly "What are you so scared of hyung?"

But it sounded more like a breath leaving his lungs.

He gestured vaguely between them, "This."

"I'm scared that if whatever this is… happens…"

His voice grew quieter. "Will it break our friendship?"

"Will it burden us?"

His eyes dropped briefly, "Will it break us?"

Then he whispered— 

"…will I lose you?"

Beomgyu's expression softened immediately. He stepped closer. Slowly lifting one hand to cup Yeonjun's cheek. His touch was warm. Gentle.

Like Yeonjun was something fragile.

"I'm scared too," Beomgyu admitted softly.

"But I'm willing to take the risk." His thumb brushed lightly against Yeonjun's cheekbone.

"I'd rather know the consequences…"

"…than spend my whole life wondering what would've happened."

Yeonjun's lips trembled slightly.

Beomgyu kept talking, "I want the people I care about to know I'm sincere."

His voice dropped to almost a whisper, "And I care about you more than anyone."

"But that's not enough."

The words came out quietly.

But they still made Beomgyu freeze.

Yeonjun saw it. Saw the hurt flash briefly across his eyes. Saw the way Beomgyu swallowed.

Then forced a small smile, "It's enough for me."

Beomgyu's voice was softer now, "Knowing I could cherish these feelings."

He exhaled slowly, "Even if it's not for a lifetime."

His eyes met Yeonjun's again, "At least in this moment…"

"…I know I love you."

A faint laugh escaped him, "So much."

His voice grew warm, "Sometimes I feel like telling everyone."

"How much I adore you."

"How much I want to take care of you."

"How much I want to cherish you."

A tear slipped down Yeonjun's cheek.
Beomgyu noticed immediately.

His fingers moved instinctively, wiping the tear away gently, "Always a crybaby."

He smiled softly. "Yeonjunnie hyung."

That only made Yeonjun cry harder.

He grabbed a fistful of Beomgyu's shirt, tugging him closer.

"You're so sentimental."

His voice shook, "And such a hopeless romantic."

Beomgyu smiled, "Only for you."

He lifted Yeonjun's face gently, "Hyung."

Their eyes met briefly.

"Look at me."

Yeonjun did.

Beomgyu held his gaze. Steady. Unwavering.

"I heard every question you asked." His thumb traced slow circles on Yeonjun's cheek. "And I'm going to answer them. One by one."

Yeonjun's breath hitched.

"Will it break our friendship?" Beomgyu repeated softly. "No. Because I won't let it. I've spent years learning how to be your friend, hyung. I know the shape of you—the parts that laugh easily, the parts that hide, the parts you only show at 2 AM when you can't sleep." A pause. "That doesn't disappear just because I also want to hold your hand."

Another tear fell. Beomgyu caught it.

"Will it burden us?" He tilted his head slightly. "Maybe. Sometimes. Love is heavy sometimes. But so is friendship. So is missing you when you're busy. So is watching you date other people and pretending it doesn't hurt." His voice softened. "I've been carrying that weight for a while now. I'd rather carry a weight that has you in it."

Yeonjun's fingers tightened on Beomgyu's shirt.

"Will it break us?" Beomgyu's voice dropped lower. "I don't know. I can't see the future. But I know what breaks things—silence does. Running does. Never saying anything until it's too late." He leaned closer. "We're not doing that. We're here. We're saying things. That's already more than most people ever get."

He paused. Let the words settle.

"And will you lose me?"

Beomgyu's eyes glistened now too.

"Yeonjun." His voice cracked slightly on the name. "You can't lose me. I'm not going anywhere. Even if you never want this—even if you walk out that door right now and tell me we're just friends forever—I'm still here. I'll still bring you soup when you're sick. I'll still laugh at your bad jokes. I'll still love you in whatever way you'll let me."

A shaky breath.

"Loving you isn't conditional on you loving me back the same way. It just is. It's been is for a long time."

Yeonjun was fully crying now. Quiet, shaking sobs.

"So when you ask if it's enough?" Beomgyu smiled through his own tears. "It's not about the love lasting forever. It's about this—right now, you and me, being honest with each other for the first time. That's enough. You're enough. You've always been enough."

He pressed his forehead gently against Yeonjun's.

And Beomgyu said softly— "Let go of your fear, hyung."

Then he grinned suddenly, "I'm still here, aren't I?"

A playful tilt of his head, "Even after getting rejected like a thousand times."

Yeonjun smacked his arm immediately, "You're exaggerating."

He sniffed, "It's been what? Four times?"

Four times you've said it, Yeonjun thought. Four times I've walked away.

And you're still here.

Beomgyu laughed, "I don't know if that's something I should be proud of."

Then he looked at Yeonjun again.

His expression softening, "But what I do know…"

He reached for Yeonjun's hand. Holding it gently. "I won't back down." His voice was steady now, "I won't leave you."

"No matter what you say."

The kitchen fell quiet again.

But this time— The silence felt different.

Not distant. Not fragile.

Just two people standing too close to pretend their hearts weren't beating for each other.

And neither of them looked away.

🐻🦊

The kitchen had gone completely quiet. The tea on the counter had long stopped steaming.

Somewhere outside, a car passed by faintly, the distant sound fading quickly into the night. But inside the apartment, the world felt smaller somehow. Like everything had narrowed down to the space between them.

Beomgyu was still holding Yeonjun's hand. Their fingers loosely intertwined. Neither of them had pulled away. Slowly, almost carefully, Beomgyu lifted his other hand. His fingers hovered for a moment before resting against Yeonjun's cheek.

Warm. Gentle.

Like he had imagined this moment too many times before and was still afraid it might disappear if he moved too quickly. His thumb brushed softly along Yeonjun's cheekbone.

Yeonjun's breath hitched slightly. Beomgyu noticed.

Of course he did.

He always noticed everything about Yeonjun.

Beomgyu stepped a little closer. Close enough that their shoes almost touched. Close enough that Yeonjun could see every detail of his face—the softness in his eyes, the faint nervousness hiding behind his usual confidence.

They were barely inches apart now.

Beomgyu swallowed. Then he asked quietly. "…I'm not reading it wrong this time, right hyung?"

For once, Yeonjun didn't answer immediately.

His eyes flickered between Beomgyu's. Like he was searching for something there. Or maybe gathering the courage he had been holding back for years.

Two years ago. Snow. Streetlight.

"I love you."

You said it first.

You've been saying it all along.

And I've been too scared to say it back.

Then Yeonjun did something Beomgyu hadn't expected.

He stepped forward and leaned down. Just a little.

And kissed him.

The kiss was slow. Careful. Almost hesitant. Like both of them were testing something fragile.

Beomgyu froze for half a second. His brain struggling to catch up with what was happening. Because he had imagined this moment so many times.

Late at night.

Walking home.

Watching Yeonjun laugh at something stupid.

But imagination had never prepared him for how real it would feel.

Beomgyu's fingers tightened slightly against Yeonjun's cheek. Not pulling him closer.

Just… making sure he was really there.

That this wasn't something his heart had made up again.

Yeonjun's lips were warm.

Soft.

The kiss lingering for a moment longer before Yeonjun slowly pulled back.

Just enough to look at him.

Their foreheads almost touching now.

Beomgyu stared at him. Eyes wide.

"…you just kissed me."

Yeonjun exhaled a quiet laugh. "Yes."

"You kissed me."

"Yes, Beomgyu."

Beomgyu blinked again, "I waited like three years for that."

Yeonjun rolled his eyes faintly, though his ears were turning pink, "You're dramatic."

"You rejected me four times."

"You keep bringing that up. It's not even a real confession!"

"Because it was traumatic."

Yeonjun laughed softly.

And something about that sound made Beomgyu's chest tighten again.

Because this laugh— This moment—

It felt like something he had been reaching for forever.

Beomgyu leaned forward slightly. Their noses brushing for a brief second.

"You know," he murmured quietly, "I really thought you were going to push me away again tonight."

Yeonjun’s expression softened, "I almost did."

Beomgyu groaned quietly. "Hyung."

"I'm serious."

Yeonjun lifted a hand, resting it lightly against Beomgyu's chest.

Right above his heart, "It's scary."

His voice dropped, "Liking you like this."

Beomgyu covered Yeonjun's hand with his own. His thumb tracing slow circles over Yeonjun's fingers.

"You think it's not scary for me?"

Yeonjun glanced up. Beomgyu smiled faintly.

"I've liked you for so long I forgot what it felt like not to."

He laughed quietly, "You know how embarrassing that is?"

Yeonjun whispered, "No."

"It's very embarrassing."

"Beomgyu."

"I'm serious."

Beomgyu shook his head. "I've been following you around like some lovesick puppy."

"You said that earlier."

"Because it's true."

Yeonjun's hand slid slightly higher against his chest.

His fingers curling into Beomgyu's shirt, "You could've stopped."

Beomgyu looked at him like the answer was obvious, "Why would I?"

"Because I kept pushing you away."

Beomgyu shrugged lightly. "Yeah."

"And you stayed."

"Yeah."

"Why?"

Beomgyu stared at him for a moment.

Then smiled softly, "Because it's you."

Like that explained everything.

Maybe it did.

🐻🦊

The silence between them settled again.

But this time it wasn't heavy.

It felt… warm.

Like something fragile had finally been acknowledged.

Beomgyu tilted his head slightly, "Can I do that too?"

Yeonjun blinked. "What?"

"The kissing part."

Yeonjun huffed out a laugh. "You're unbelievable."

"So is that a yes?"

Yeonjun didn't answer.

But he didn't move away either.

That was enough.

Beomgyu leaned in slowly. Much slower than Yeonjun had earlier.

Giving him plenty of time to stop him if he wanted to.

But Yeonjun didn't.

Instead, his hand tightened slightly against Beomgyu's shirt. Pulling him closer.

Their second kiss felt different.

Still soft.

Still careful.

But less hesitant now.

Like both of them finally understood what they were reaching for.

Beomgyu's hand slid from Yeonjun's cheek to the back of his neck, holding him gently as their lips met again. And somewhere in the middle of that quiet kitchen, after years of longing and misunderstandings and unsaid feelings.

They finally stopped pretending.

When they pulled apart, Beomgyu was smiling.

Really smiling.

The kind that reached his eyes, "Hyung."
Yeonjun hummed quietly.

"I love you."

Yeonjun's breath caught.

Four times, you said it and I walked away.

This is the fifth.

And I'm going to stay.

Yeonjun's voice was barely a whisper, "I know."

Beomgyu laughed softly. "That's all I get?"

Yeonjun looked at him. Really looked at him.

At the boy who had waited.

Who had stayed.

Who had loved him loudly and openly even when Yeonjun gave him nothing in return.

"I love you too, Beomgyu-yah."

The words felt foreign on his tongue. But good. Really good.

Beomgyu's eyes widened. Then he grinned, "Say it again."

"No."

"Hyung."

"No."

"Yeonjunnie."

"Absolutely not."

Beomgyu laughed and pulled him closer. "Fine. I'll just have to make you say it again later."

Yeonjun rolled his eyes. But he was smiling.

And for the first time in two years— Neither of them was running.