Archive of Our Own

“I fell in love with her courage, her sincerity, and her flaming self respect. And it's these things I'd believe in, even if the whole world indulged in wild suspicions that she wasn't all she should be. I love her and it is the beginning of everything.”
― F. Scott Fitzgerald

They learned quickly how hard it could be for Anna to sleep indoors. Even in perfectly safe inns and Houses of Salvation, she couldn’t sleep, paranoia coming for her. She slept in barns just fine, and they started figuring it out when it was just too hot to not crack open a window. And she calmed down enough to doze off.

So they started running the experiment. Windows open or close, curtains drawn or not, lamps on? Kratos was getting used to waking up to shouts, to his own knife that he’d given her pointed at him with her wild-eyed above him. But slowly, those nights were happening less, and the dark circles under her eyes were starting to go away.

“Thanks for—being patient,” Anna said once. They weren’t...friends yet, but they got along at least half the time. She was trusting him more, and not just out of necessity.

“It’s alright.” He hesitated before adding, “We used to have nightmares often too. At least now, I don’t need the sleep. But I remember how difficult it was.”

“By ‘we’, you mean Mithos, Martel, and Yuan?”

“...Yes.”

She’d rested her chin on her stick-thin arms. “Tell me about them?”

He’d been honest about Cruxis, about what what he was. He’d earned himself a rather magnificent black eye for it; for someone still so thin and weak, her rage had put a hell of an oomph into that punch.

She’d never expressed curiosity about any of it though. And it took—a while, for the words to come. Kratos had never had to speak about them before. Not to anyone who hadn’t already known them. And it had been...centuries, maybe, since he last spoke of them.

But Anna waited patiently until he found something to say about them. A memory, not even a specific one. It could’ve been one of a dozen nights of them rotating watches, of the way they would care for each others’ hair before bed, something grounding that meant safety, it meant this wasn’t a battlefield where they didn’t have time for this. Yuan’s hitching snores, Martel’s cold nose pressed against the neck of whoever was nearest, Mithos jamming himself into their ribs, all knees and elbows like kids tended to be.

Anna snorted at that, a wistful smile on her face. “Yeah…my sister was the same way. She’d crawl into my bed when she had nightmares and manage to find every—single—artery—when she did.”

Anna had never spoken of her family before either, beyond having some in Luin. “Were you close?”

“With my sister? Yeah, we were only three years apart. Goddess, but she used to be such an annoying kid.” Her smile fell. “Didn’t think I’d miss her. Used to joke that I’d pack her up and send her to Hima on the next caravan.”

He and Yuan had never joked about shipping each other off. It was somewhere too close to home, to seeing the draft notice, to inventing lies about needing his half-elven slave with him. “Yuan used to threaten to cook me over a fire if I said another dumb thing.”

A laugh startled it’s way out of her, cut off as quickly as it came. “Was he a good cook at least?”

What a question. Off-center, he replied without thinking, “Yes, but that’s beside the point.”

This time, she let her laughter stay, warm and inviting, her grin sharp-edged, but not threatening like it had been before this. It was...enough for them to gain a certain comfort in conversation that they hadn’t had yet, enough for Anna to eventually lull herself to sleep on a scratchy inn mattress while Kratos stayed seated by the door, ever watchful.

“I think I see it!” Anna raced ahead up the rise, stopping short at the top.

Kratos followed her up at his regular pace. Down below was the village of Izlood, its buildings scattered along the coast. Further out, their fishing boats were visible, sails high on the horizon.

“Whoa...that’s the ocean, huh?”

“Indeed.”

“I knew it was big but...that doesn’t even cover it,” Anna breathed. “So much water…”

The first time Kratos had seen the ocean, he hadn’t been able to appreciate it. It had been a moonless night, and the water looked nothing less than shifting ink in a void as they snuck onto a ship. They’d known the ocean through whatever seeped through the cracks or washed into the hold, through the way it slapped against the hull and how it roiled beneath the ship in a storm.

His first good look at it had been entirely too close and personal. There had been a real risk of getting trapped in a rapidly flooding hold, so they’d scrambled on deck, hoping to disappear in the confusion. The waves washed them away, ripping Yuan’s hand from his. His lungs burning, unable to see anything except flashes of green lightning spearing through the water. They’d only survived because Noishe had fished Yuan out of the water, and Kratos had found a barrel to cling to.

Anna dragged him literally from his memories by the hand, her smile bright. “C’mon! I want a closer look!”

At the beach, there were a few women mending a large net, their children playing in the shallows. She rolled up her pants and walked into the water without hesitation, yelping at the temperature. Noishe followed her, whining when she flicked water at him, using his muzzle to splash water back at her.

She was gifted with the kind of extroverted personality that had her making friends with anyone. Therefore, Kratos was entirely unsurprised when the kids came up, a mix of shy and curious at Noishe. Anna crouched, smiling, and bringing her hand up to scratch Noishe’s shoulder.

“He’s very friendly, don’t worry. He just looks scary.” She caught his eye from where he’d found a place to sit on the sand. Just like some other people I could name, she didn’t say, but he could hear clear as day.

The kids giggled as Noishe licked their faces, and was patient when they climbed on him and he cantered about, bouncing extra to make the ride rockier. Anna laughed, and helped them balance.

“Do you know how to swim, miss?” one of the older kids asked.

“You bet I do. I grew up on the water. Why?”

“Wanna race?” His grin was missing some teeth.

“You’re on!”

The kids cheered and shouted as they dove in, Noishe making sure they didn’t go too deep. Anna was a good swimmer, but she’d never had to deal with waves and a current like this before. The kid won, and Anna collapsed on the sand, breathing hard, but waving away their concern.

Their mothers called them back, and Kratos moved to sit beside her prone form, placing his cloak over her as a towel. “Defeated by a ten year old.”

She shot him a stink eye as she sat up, leaning on her hands. It was gone as quick as it came as she looked back out at the water. “I didn’t think swimming in there would be so different!”

“Perhaps with some more practice, you might be able to beat him.”

“You’re right!” Anna scrubbed the cloak quickly over her skin and scalp. Her hair wasn’t long enough yet to retain much water. “Watch, that kid won’t know what hit ‘im.”

“You okay?” she asked from behind Noishe.

Was he okay?! What kind of person asked that after a Desian platoon had attacked them?

“You shouldn’t concern yourself with me,” he said, looking her over. No visible injuries.

“That’s gotta be one of the stupidest things I’ve ever heard you say.” She stalked towards him, chin jutting out. A foot shorter and maybe a hundred-twenty pounds soaking wet, but it never felt like it with her fearlessness. “You’re an amazing warrior, Kratos, but you’re not perfect and you’re sure as hell not invincible. So excuse me if I get concerned about your well-being. All it would take is one accident and those claws could’ve taken your head off!”

“Yes, but I am far more equipped to handle them than you are. My job is to protect you, so you’re my priority.”

“Not at the expense of your own safety it’s not.” She looked pointedly at his arm. One of them had gotten a lucky shot off, a laser burned across his bicep. “So now that you’re done being all protective, sit your ass down and let me look at it.”

“I can Heal it,” he said.

She arched an unimpressed eyebrow. “Thought you said Healing doesn’t work through infections?”

“It doesn’t.”

“Wonderful. That’s a burn, so it’s even more likely to be infected. So I’m gonna clean it, and then you can Heal it and we can figure out how to get rid of these bodies.”

He deflated under the force of her will, letting her do her work. She washed it clean with some bar soap and water from her canteen. He sat quietly while she did it; Anna’s temper wasn’t hard to spark exactly, but her being actually upset was different than her usual flashes. She was less gentle than was strictly necessary, but he didn’t wince away.

“There,” she said finally.

“It’s not serious,” he assured her, the First Aid glowing a soft green on his arm.

“I know that. And I know that it would take a lot to actually take you down.” She didn’t look at him, fists clenched in her lap. “But your safety isn’t trivial to me, Kratos. We’re...friends, aren’t we?”

He blinked at her. Were they? He hadn’t made a friend in...millennia. What did that look like anymore? “I…”

“It’s okay if you don’t think so.” But there was something vulnerable in her voice, something bruised in the shadows of her eyes. “But for my part, I—I think of you as a friend. And I don’t want to see my friends hurt. And I know I can’t like, defend you against something like the Desians.” Whenever she said their name, it came out like a curse. “And I can’t do magic to fix it, but I can at least help with this part. So let me help.”

It had been so long since Kratos had felt helpless; he’d forgotten how empty it felt. “...I apologize for worrying you,” he said. “And thank you for your help, and your concern.”

“You’re welcome.”
They looted the bodies of the Desians for any supplies. Anna took one of their bootknives, and they came away with a few gels and a small purse of gald. Stacking the bodies on top of each other, Anna poked some dried grass and leaves in between them for kindling so Kratos could set them ablaze before they moved upwind to make camp.

After Kratos had gotten their campfire going, and Anna was slicing some cheese and bread for sandwiches, he said, “...I’d like it if we were friends.”

Her head shot up, eyes wide like she couldn’t believe it. Then a slow smile spread, crooked and pulled up one one side due to her scar. “Yeah, okay.”

“Aaaaand go!”

Anna’s hand was a furious blur over the page, a match to Kratos’. Noishe barked five minutes later when the little hourglass ran empty.

She clicked her tongue, dropping her knees that she’d been using as a desk so Kratos could see her notebook. The challenge was something Anna had come up with when they’d been trapped in Izlood for a hurricane. Draw something in five minutes and see who could do it better. It was easy, entertaining, and genuinely fun in a way Kratos had forgotten something so simple could be.

Kratos was in the lead so far, but this time Anna might have beat him. “That’s a duck?” she asked.

He would be the first to admit he wasn’t an artist, but he didn’t think it looked so bad. “Of course it is.”

Anna tilted her head. “That’s a lot of legs for a duck.”

“Those are its flight feathers. Observe.” He pointed. “Wings, legs.”

“Yeah, sure. What’s that around its neck?”

“Some species have that pattern around their neck. The males usually. The colors help them to attract a mate.”

She made a doubtful sound low in her throat. “I gotta give you the benefit of the doubt on that one. I’ve never seen a duck with patterns like that. Regardless, I definitely won this time.” Her victory made her eyes gleam. “Looks like you’re doing the dishes tonight!”

“I’ll make sure the next topic is particularly challenging,” he promised.

“Bring it on!”

He heard her first, the snarl and growl of curses and the thuds of something heavy into flesh. The paper bag of groceries dropped from his arms—oranges were in season, and he’d been excited to see her pleased smile as they split one—sprinting through the crowded market towards her voice.

Desians. Two of them had her on the ground, kneeling on her back while another was sporting a swollen face. One of the others had a bloody gash on his arm.

Kratos didn’t ask questions. He cut them down, all three of them, starting with the two on her. He shoved their bodies off of her, and held out his empty left hand, not yet ready to sheathe his sword. What if they had reinforcements?

“Are you hurt?”

Anna struggled to her knees; they’d managed to tie her hands. She was bruised and there was blood in her teeth. Her bootknife was strewn in the alley, also slick with blood. “I’ll be fine.” She spat at the corpses.

“Let me get the ropes.” He moved behind her to cut her free. “Were there others?”

“Not that I saw.” She massaged the red skin of her wrists. “But we can’t just leave these guys here.”

No, they couldn’t. It would be too much evidence. At least if they disposed of the bodies, it would take a bit longer for the Desians to be reported missing. That would buy them time to get out of Palmacosta.

A man hauling a crate over his shoulder passed the alley and froze when he saw them. Kratos and Anna stiffened; were they about to be dragged in front of the authorities? Even if people didn’t like the Desians, they didn’t want to be in trouble with them either. Better someone else’s skin.

“I’ll be right back,” he said. “I’ve got something that should fit them.”

The man did come back with a much longer crate, hastily emptied of a lot of its straw by the looks of it. Kratos wiped his sword clean on their bodies before sheathing it. “I’m with the navy milita,” the man said. “No one’s gonna miss a few more Desians. I’ll go dump ‘em when I head out today.”

“This could be on your head,” Anna told him, even as she helped drag one into the crate.

“Let ‘em come.” His smile was more a baring of teeth. “Ain’t none of Palmacosta going down without a fight.”

Anna grinned back, fierce. “Hell no you’re not.”

Kratos took one end of the crate, and the man took the other. He held his end with one hand while he dug in his pocket with the other. He tossed Anna a set of keys. “I live up the road. Corner of Carpenter and Vine. Pink building, number 202. There’s a shoeshop downstairs. It’s my husband’s day off; just let ‘im know I sent you.”

She shook her head, holding out the keys like it was a snake. “We can’t put you and your husband in more danger.”

“That’s not your choice to make. I’m Anton, by the way. Husband’s Jacopo. Me and your friend’ll be right back.”

Kratos helped him heave the crate onto a smaller vessel. He didn’t know enough about ships to say much, but it certainly wasn’t one of the big ones intended for longer sea travel. “...Thank you, for your kindness.”

Anton clapped his shoulder. “My mama would come back from the grave to whoop me if she knew I just kept walkin’ when somebody needed help. We gotta watch out for each other, y’know?”

“I suppose we do.”

Kratos followed him back to that pink building. The man who could only be Jacopo was short and brown-skinned. He’d made a pot of coffee and had put out some bread and cheese.

“I didn’t know we were expectin’ guests today,” Jacopo said lightly, arching an eyebrow at his husband. “I would’ve dressed for the occasion.”

Anton grinned, kissing him briefly. “You always did love a surprise.”

Jacopo looked past Anton to Kratos. “She’s in the bathroom getting fixed up. I offered to help, but—”

“She’s not very good at accepting help. You two have already done more than enough. Excuse me while I check on her.”

“Of course. I gave her our first aid kit, but let us know if you need anything else.”

Kratos knocked and waited for permission before entering the bathroom. She was shirtless and twisting in the mirror to look at the bruises along her ribs. They looked nasty, red and starting to purple.

“They don’t feel broken at least.” She took a few deep breaths to demonstrate, wincing only a little.

Moving slowly, Kratos laid a hand on her ribs, reaching out with his mana to confirm. He wasn’t sensitive enough to do much, but Martel had taught him what to feel for with broken bones, to make sure they weren’t going to damage anything important when they were Healed back into place. Anna was right; nothing broken.

He released a First Aid, letting the warmth of his mana seep under her skin to fix the cracks in her ribs, the bruises and aches. A tension in her released almost immediately, and she leaned a little into his hand.

Reaching up, he swiped a gentle thumb over her swollen lip. She’d washed the worst of it from her face. “Did you bite your tongue?”

Her smile, always crooked, looked even moreso when she grinned like that. Impish and fierce. “Oh most of that wasn’t mine. I took out a chunk of that bastard’s hand when he tried to stop me from calling out.”

Anna Irving was a marvel. “Good girl.”

She barked a laugh. “Jacopo gave me a clean shirt. My shoulders hurt to move though. Help me out?”

“Of course.” He held the shirt up for her, sliding it up one arm and helping to lift her other arm into the sleeve. “Do you have any other injuries?”

She shook her head, struggling to do up the buttons with shaking hands. The adrenaline drop was hitting; Kratos batted her hands away to do it himself.

“Thanks for coming for me,” she said quietly. She didn’t say anything about the cold terror that had seized her spine as soon as those Desians had honed in on her.

“You never need to thank me for that.” It was due to his own inaction that she was ever in this kind of position to begin with, that she was a target for the Desians, that the Desians even existed. “I will always come for you.”

She tilted her head at him, something odd and fond in her eyes. So different from the venomous rage she’d started with. “I believe you. Now c’mon, let’s go make nice with our new friends.”

Anna was a social creature, so it wasn’t unusual for her to strike up a conversation with every shopkeep in the area. The paranoid part of Kratos hated it, but he couldn’t deny that connection and energy that she needed. He often stood further back, close enough to keep an eye out, but also not to look intimidating.

She bounced back to him with an armful of groceries. “James sent me with some extra stuff for free. And he gave me a recipe that I can’t wait to try. And I promise—no tomatoes this time.”

They were both decent cooks—Kratos a bit better than her, but that was from sheer practice. So he agreed and held the groceries until they left town for their campsite. They tried not to stay in towns too often; it became too easy to be recognizable and reported back to the Desians. Noishe had been in charge of watching the campsite, and he immediately came to greet them, accepting scratches for payment even as Kratos leaned to keep some of the meat away.

“Okay.” Anna sat by the fire, pulling out the paper she’d scribbled the recipe on. “I got this.”

“I have absolute faith in you.” It wasn’t sarcastic, but she gave him a suspicious look anyway before refocusing. He set about separating their new medical supplies, and triple-checking his count of what exactly they had.
He heard her muttering her instructions to herself, and chopping the ingredients while shoving away Noishe’s curious nose. “None of this is for you! You’ll get sick!”

Disappointed whines, but it didn’t stop him from making big hopeful eyes at her. He eventually flopped to the ground by Kratos. “You didn’t used to be so dramatic,” he told Noishe, patting his side. “She’s been a bad influence on you.”

“I heard that! Maybe I won’t share this delicious chili with you.”

“I thought you said it wouldn’t have tomatoes?”
“It doesn’t! James says his wife doesn’t like tomatoes either, so he figured this recipe out.” She scooped some of the chili out, blowing to cool it off before taking a careful sip. Her face twisted, eyes widening.

“Anna?”

Her voice came out cracked and an octave higher. “It’s fine.” She cleared her throat, coughing as she scrambled for the recipe, squinting at it through watery eyes.”The hell’s in this?”

The laughter bubbled out of him, unbid. The look on Anna’s red-cheeked face as she swung around to stare at him only made it worse.

After a second, she joined him, her laughter warm and loud. He was still smiling when she leaned into him, her grin toothy and inviting. “I’ve never heard you laugh before!”

His cheeks hurt a little; she was right. When was the last time he’d been able to laugh like that? (His mind conjures memories, flicker-fast, of Yuan’s sly humor, Martel’s biting wit at his elbow, Mithos’ pointed observations paired with the too-sweet smile. Games of cards huddled near a hearth, Yuan’s playful, cocky crowing before a spar, the tangle of Mithos’ limbs as he grew tripping him up, Martel’s wilder stories of patients at the clinic)

“You should do it more often.” Anna’s voice jolted him from the memories. “It’s a great sound!”

He blinked at her. “...thank you?”

She snorted. “Maybe next time, just not at my expense.”

“Don’t add so much chili oil then. I can smell it from here.”

“Don’t act like that’s impressive. You can smell an ant farting from twenty yards away.” Anna poked at the soup in the pot. “…Know any way to fix it?”

“Let me see what I can do.”

“I’d appreciate it if you could stop causing headaches for me,” a familiar voice called, long before they were in range.

Kratos drew his sword, Anna drawing behind Noishe on instinct, though her hand was on her knife as well. Yuan stepped into the ring of firelight, hands raised and empty. Not that that meant anything; he didn’t need a weapon to be dangerous.

“He’s a Desian!” Anna said. “I’ve seen him at the ranch!”

Yuan’s eyes flickered between her and Kratos. “I’m not here to capture you.”

“...Is it a kill order then?” Kratos asked softly. He didn’t want to fight Yuan, but he’d made his choice when he’d helped Anna escape. He knew what the price would be, eventually.

“Not that I know of. I’m here to warn you actually. That woman of yours is causing a lot of commotion.”

“Hey! You can stop talking about me like I’m not standing right here, asshole.” Kratos didn’t take his eyes off Yuan, but he could hear Anna taking a few steps forward. Bold as ever.

His lips curled in a faint, approving smirk. “I can see why he likes you. We’ve received intelligence that those rebels who call themselves the Renegades are staging some kind of situation in Triet in the next few days. Desian presence will be heavy there.”

“And you’re doing this out of the generosity of your heart?”

“Yggdrasill tasked me with finding the leader of those Renegades. The Grand Cardinals were supposed to be in charge of quelling that organization, but lately, a good chunk of their efforts are out on a wild goose chase for an experiment and a traitor.”

“So why choose to not attack?” It wasn’t making sense. “If you kill me, Anna couldn’t overpower you.”

“That sounds like a lot of trouble to me.” Noishe padded slowly closer to Yuan, eyes narrowed. Yuan held out a hand for him to sniff while glancing up at Kratos. “I’m not worried about Kvar’s schemes, or whatever he’s been up to in that human ranch, so therefore, you’re not my problem.”

Noishe licked his palm, tail wagging. At the show of trust, Kratos lowered his sword, dissecting Yuan’s words. He’d always been good at double-speak, but there used to not be any reason for it between them. Then again, they weren’t the same as they were anymore.

All of that was the truth. Yuan wouldn’t be concerned about Desian problems; they had usually been under Kratos’ purview as Yuan dealt with the political sides on both worlds. But if Kratos wasn’t his problem, then he wouldn’t have any reason to be here warning them. And Yuan didn’t need to lay a trap to take out Kratos. They were very closely matched; he would simply have to bring more angels with him to take Anna.

And Yuan knew all that. So this was really all he said it was: a warning for the oldest of his friends.

“...Would you like some dinner?” Kratos offered, sheathing his sword.

“What the hell, Kratos? You’re gonna trust him just like that?”

“I am.”

There was a risk, of course. They weren’t the same men they had been. Yuan could be playing some layered game to capture her. But he’d taken his bets on Yuan all his life, from the first time they met when they were nine. Yuan was not so different now from that boy then.

Yuan snorted a little. “Soft-hearted as ever. You could do with some of her paranoia.”

“Thought we already talked about this? I’m right here, and my name is Anna. If you’re staying, you’re giving me your name and you’re gonna learn some manners.”

Kratos chuckled a little to himself as he returned to the pan sitting over the fire. At least with these two going head to head, he would get dinner and a show.

“And you think you’re going to be the one to teach them to me?”

“Thought you would’ve learned it already, but I guess it is up to me to teach an old dog new tricks.”

“And clearly I have to educate you in turn in how to speak to your betters.”

“Sure. Alert me when there’s one around so I can practice. Still ain’t got your name.”

Yuan held out a hand and introduced himself, smirk still firmly in place. Anna shook it, and whistled Noishe away from where he was nosing curiously at the pockets of Yuan’s cloak. She took her seat back across the fire.

“You have a weird taste in friends, Kratos,” she said.

“Yes, you’d know, wouldn’t you?”

Her faux offended noise had Yuan coughing to cover up his laughter, and Kratos didn’t bother to hide his smile.

The river flowed sluggish at this curve. It made a convenient spot for laundry and bathing, so after Kratos had finished scrubbing their clothes with soap and letting them rinse clean, he tied off a rope between some trees as a clothesline before undressing. It had been a few days since they’d had a chance for a bath, and Kratos relished in the chance to scrub the dust and sweat from the road away.

They were at least a week of travel from any proper town. They’d put Hima behind them almost six days ago, grateful to get away from the biting early autumn winds up there. Even down here, the wind had a chill to it, but nothing like Hima. The one good part about being so far away from anything was that the worst thing Kratos had to worry about was monsters. Desians didn’t have much of a patrol here in these distant roads, and Noishe was more than capable of dealing with some monsters on his own. It let Kratos relax a little more, let his paranoia stretch to more space between he and Anna. (He can’t stop seeing her in that cell, skeletal and eyes blazing. He sees her in that alley, the Desians standing over her. He dreams sometimes of the scar on her face fresh and vivid, of the bruises he’d had to convince her to let him Heal)

They got along well, and he could confidently say they were friends now, but it was still all day, every day with each other and no one else. Noishe didn’t quite count. Kratos had always been someone who treasured time to himself, and he and Anna needed breaks from each other more often than they got them.

He squeezed whatever water he could out of of his hair and roughly toweled himself dry before getting dressed. He didn’t feel hunger most of the time. Not properly, not how he remembered feeling it. The awareness of empty space in his stomach, the rumbles, the gnawing void as the days stretched thinner before you stopped feeling it much at all. But Anna needed regular meals more than most to help her recover properly, so it had somewhat put his mind back on a schedule too. Dinner was still some ways away, but there was jerky and apples in their pack that would be a nice snack.

Noishe didn’t even lift his head from his paws as Kratos approached. Anna was sitting near him, their sewing supplies laid out before them, tongue between her teeth and a low litany of curses as she tried to thread the needle.

Crouching by the packs, Kratos sighed and traded her a few pieces of jerky for the needle and thread. The ends were horribly frayed; she’d been at this for a while. Anna’s fingers tended to stiffen and lock up more in the cold, and the past few weeks of travel as the temperatures began to drop must have made it worse. Fine motor control like this wasn’t going to be in the cards today apparently.

He handed back the tied off needle and froze as he properly absorbed the sight of her. The shirt she wore was entirely too big and the collar slipped down, exposing the curve of her shoulder and the sharp line of her collarbone as she reached for the needle.

“Thanks!” she said, shrugging the shirt back in place before pulling her hand through whatever fabric she was mending, squinting at the problem areas.

“...That’s my shirt,” he said, blood loud in his ears.

“Oh, yeah. You took all my other ones to wash, and I gotta fix this one ‘cause it’s the one those birds tore up when they took it off the line last time, remember?” Anna blinked at him. “...Is that okay?”

“Yes, of course.” Clearing his dry throat, he said, “I’ll go guard the laundry from anymore violent birds.”

“Sure thing. Once I finish this, I’ll switch with you. Noishe and I need a bath too.”

Noishe huffed at her, but Kratos didn’t stick around to see what her reaction was.

It wasn’t uncommon for Anna to be restless, but when she hadn’t come back into their shared room in a while, he went looking for her. He doubted she was in danger—Noishe’s howling would be heard for a mile if he thought there was a threat—but he grabbed a cloak anyway.

She’d found a thin staircase near the docks, and she’d climbed high enough that she could see the entire harbor. He gave her the cloak before sitting a few steps below her. It was entirely too narrow for two people to sit side by side.

Most of the ships had come in to dock, and the lanterns were lit. Sailors were calling to each other, slinging arms around and shouting about heading to the closest bar. The moonlight was strong today, illuminating everything clearly.

“...This kinda reminds me of home, y’know?”

Kratos hummed a little to let her know he was listening.

“We’d get boats from up and down the river comin’ in. Dad’d help unload our deliveries and then we had to inventory them. They’d usually come in pretty early in the day, before the sun rose, so they could get any repairs and whatnot before they headed back out.

“The local boats though—we’d take turns climbin’ up and down and helping out if they needed extra hands. And my sister and I would make these lanterns to hang for festival days, when the boats weren’t allowed to go out. We’d make huge strings of ‘em and hang them from the masts to the roofs to the fountain…”

“It sounds wonderful.” He’d only had one friend as a kid, and they couldn’t be seen doing such things. They’d sneak out to town sometimes, and find ways to make their own fun, but...the options hadn’t been many. Not if Yuan was going to be safe. He didn’t know what it was to have a stable community like that. It had been the four of them traveling as a squad, and they’d made friends with others in the military, and had made friends, but...it wasn’t the same. They’d traveled too much to settle in with any one group.

“I’m gonna go back someday.” Her voice was low; a promise and a threat, all at once. “When it’s safe again.”

He leaned back until the top of his shoulders met her shins. A too-small comfort. “I’m sure they’ll have an entire festival in your honor.”

“Ha!” She leaned her weight forward, her knees bumping against the back of his head. “I can hear it now: The Feast of Anna! Far and wide for being the wildest part north of Ossa.”

“Why stop there? Why not in all of Sylvarant?”

Her laughter rippled warm and intimate, echoing through the narrow stairwell. “You’re right! I’m dreaming too small! In both worlds!”

“There you go.”

She pat the top of his head before scratching affectionately at his scalp. “You’ll be my guest of honor.”

“Oh is that all?” He tilted his head back so he could look at her upside down.

She kissed his brow. “Don’t you think highly of yourself?” she teased, lips brushing his skin with every word.

“I thought I’d earned it.”

“Mmmm. Maybe. I might take some convincing, you know. I’m stubborn like that.”

He reached up, tangling his fingers in her short hair to tug her closer into an awkward kiss. She yelped into his mouth, having to brace herself on the walls for balance before she toppled over. “I can be very convincing,” he told her.

Her teeth flashed in a sly grin as she leaned in. “Prove it then.”

“Ew ew ew ew.”

Kratos had to agree. The caterpillar monsters had been a basic breed, but apparently this group had been sick or something because unlike all the—what, hundreds?—that Kratos had killed in his life, they’d decided to explode some kind of goo all over them.

“Tell me it’s not poisonous?” Anna was already shedding her clothes, making a beeline for the stream.

“It shouldn’t be.”

“Thank Martel for small miracles. Can you pass the soap?”

Kratos fished it out of their pack, tossing it and a rag to her before starting to strip down himself. The goo smelled too, something vaguely smokey and sour. The stream wasn’t very deep, but at least the water was warm this time of year.

They scrubbed themselves down until their skins were pink with effort, not wanting a single smudge of the goo left. Anna twisted her head around, trying to see her back. “Did I get it all?”

He tugged her closer; there had indeed been some particularly stubborn spots by her shoulder blades, and a spot behind her left ear. “That should be it. Do you want me to help with your hair?”

Anna winced at the thought. “Yes please.” She didn’t have much hair yet. It was growing longer, starting to get past her ears, but it was still thin and fell out a lot.

She leaned her head on Kratos’ shoulder. He was tall enough that he could still scrub down her hair like this without getting all scrunched up. She hummed contentedly as he massaged the soap into her scalp, methodical and gentle as he ever was.

“Rinse.”

She dunked her head and let him inspect the situation, combing her hair out of her face and making sure there was no lingering gunk anywhere. “You’re clean.”

“My turn. But you gotta sit down or something.”

He knelt in the water, looking like some kind of wandering warrior in a folk tale. Which he technically was. Anna knew better though; Kratos was a lot of incredible things, but they didn’t negate how very ordinary he was at the same time. Kratos’ hair was a mess to comb through on a good day, but the gunk had made this really bad. She had to scrub hard at it to get everything out, but she was trying not to rip his hair out by the root either.

“Hang on, lemme get the comb.” She dashed out, squeaking a little as the cooler air hit her. Combing his hair took longer, carefully brushing out the nasty knots. His hair was thick and retained so much water. “I vote we find an inn at Asgard and finally get a hot bath.”

“That sounds tempting.” The only reason it was so warm at this time of year was that they were lingering near Triet. Winter was rapidly approaching, and they would need to find a place to hunker down. Asgard was as good a place as any; there were enough tourists and the town was sprawled enough that it would be easy to hide in. It was still too close for his own comfort to Kvar, but they also couldn’t just stay trapped out in the mountains during winter.

“I thought it might. And a real bed too.” She finger combed some knots out of his bangs. “...It’d be nice to be able to settle somewhere.”

They’d had this conversation once before. Kratos had offered to take her to Tethe’alla, where the Desians would literally be unable to find her. He would never forget her blazing eyes and the refusal to be run off her own world.

“Arguably we could try and find somewhere remote. Disguise ourselves if we go into town, but...it could be possible.”

Her hands stilled. “...Where would we go?”

Kratos was silent for long moments while he thought it over. Her hands started back up, faltering and distracted. Anywhere near Luin or the entire Asgard continent was out of the question. Kvar would never stop the search for her, and would always be keeping tabs on her remaining family. Arguably, the Palmacostan continent was also possible, but there were rumblings of the new man running for Governor-General who was a bit of a radical. It would draw a lot of attention from Magnius, who didn’t do well with dissent. Thoda was entirely too close to the Palmacosta ranch and Izlood was too major of a trade route.

Which left the Iselian ranch. Triet was too isolated to provide many good escape routes, but with Iselia’s non-aggression treaty, they had a more focused Desian presence than most. Inside of Iselia was out of the question; they didn’t trust outsiders due to that very same treaty. But if they were looking for a remote place...Forcystus was a capable leader. He would have patrols, but he wouldn’t be wasting resources looking into the mountains unnecessarily. And there were viable trade routes out to Triet that they could dip into without drawing too much suspicion.

“It would be difficult, but...arguably somewhere between Iselia and Triet.” The mountains provided natural defenses, the land was good enough that they could likely have enough of a garden for themselves to help provide. Multiple places to run if need be, without being completely disconnected from either village.

Her hands slid down to his shoulders and he felt her lips press to his hair. “Can we try? Please?”

Kratos pulled one of her hands forward, kissing the palm. “After the snows clear.”

“I don’t need to eat,” he reminded her. Perhaps he should get it tattooed on his forehead based on how much Anna listened to him. She didn’t need to waste food or money on him.

“Not needing to eat and not being able to enjoy the experience of eating are two different things,” Anna scoffed. Maybe one day, she’d get that tattooed across her face with the amount of times she said it to him. “Besides, have you ever even tried this?”

‘This’ was some kind of fish on a stick, coated in sauce and breading. “I can’t say I have, no.”

“What’s the point of being immortal if you can’t even enjoy it. Here.” She thrust the second skewer at him, tilting her head to catch drips of sauce coming off hers.

He took a bite of the fish obediently, unsurprised at the bright burst of chile and lime from the sauce. Anna was fond of bold sauce on all her food. She wanted to find the spiciest foods in the world, she’d declared, just to try them.

“’s good, right?” Anna said, wiping sauce from her chin.

Kratos caught her hand, tugging her closer until he could wrap his lips around her fingers, sucking them clean, keeping up eye contact the whole time, just to make sure he could see the rare sight of his usually shameless wife turning bright red.

“You’re a menace, Kratos Aurion,” Anna hissed.

He hummed, releasing her hand, but leaning in to kiss her. “You’re right,” he said mildly. “It’s delicious.”

Kratos’ days were, to a large degree, predictable these days. They’d returned to Triet after the winter, and it had been some quiet days recently. Winter meant little to Triet except for a sharp decline in trade as Iselia and Izlood were snowed out.

Anna had declined his information to go to the armorer to see about banging out some dents in his shield. She’d wanted a nap to help with the nausea she’d been having since this morning. Perhaps she was getting ill. Her Exsphere protected her very well from all kinds of disease, but some things would inevitably slip through.

So when he entered their room at the inn, he wasn’t expecting to see Anna and Yuan seated across from each other playing cards.

“Your friend here is a card shark,” Yuan said with the absent-minded edge that meant he was enjoying himself. Then again, he’d always loved a clever opponent, and Anna was certainly that. When it came to games of strategy, Anna usually beat Kratos.

“Have you considered you’re just outmatched?”

“I found these,” Kratos said, giving Anna a small pouch of ginger candies. The herb-woman swore by them for nausea. “I’m told they’ll help.”

She smiled gratefully up at him, setting her hand of cards facedown in her lap so she could unwrap one of the candies. Yuan’s eyes flicked between them, observant as ever. Kratos pulled up a chair, studying his oldest friend in return.

“...Still looking for those rebels?”

“We certainly found some. But they’re stubborn and not talking on whoever’s in charge. They had a safe house a few miles off the road to Iselia that we cleared out. I expect any of their rebels that attempt to go to that safe house would come here upon seeing it compromised.” Yuan played a two of clubs and swept the pile of played cards to the side with it.

“Convenient that you found us.”

“Perhaps you’ve forgotten in your old age—Noishe is rather distinct.”

“And he isn’t inside the town limits. So unless you’re scouting the desert yourself and spotted him, we’re compromised.” Anna flipped one of three cards facedown in front of her into the pile.

“You aren’t. I wouldn’t suggest staying here for very much longer, but I thought it was clear already that I’m not here to capture either of you.”

“Perhaps your orders had changed. Or is this supposed to be a friendly visit?”

“This is clearly my masochism taking over,” Yuan grumbled, picking up the stack. Anna flipped her second facedown card as he organized his suddenly large hand. “But no—my orders remain completely quiet on the topic of you two.”

“And if they weren’t?” A thrum of old anxiety tickled Kratos’ throat. Yuan and Mithos had never been on great terms, even when they were holed away in their inventions. But Yuan had always had a self-preservation streak as wide as the sky. If it came down to his life or Kratos’…which would he choose?

Kratos used to know the answer to that question.

“...That’ll be an interesting day.”

He wished he could say he was surprised by that response.

Yuan scowled down as Anna cleared her side of the field and hand. “I’m convinced you’re cheating somewhere.”

“Prove it then.” Anna smiled at Kratos. “You joining in this round?”

She’d been quiet today, whatever sickness in her body sapping some of her usual fiery energy. But she wasn’t stupid and she’d been taking her own mental notes on Yuan’s responses. When it was just the two of them again, she’d have questions.

But that was later. For now, he would let himself soak in the presence of two of his most precious people. “Deal me in.”

By the time Kratos was finishing his story about the birth of Efreet, how he had been an ambitious hunter who stole fire from Aska to bring it back to his people, Anna was almost fully asleep.

“Y’got a nice voice,” she mumbled into his chest. “Not sure I ever told y’that.”

He hummed, making it deeper than usual so she would smile as she felt it against her ear. “You had not.”

Her arm slung around his waist squeezed him in a hug. “’s good for tellin’ stories. And y’know a lot of ‘em.”

“As do you.” They’d started this tradition about a year ago, when Anna had asked if he’d ever heard about Undine’s blessing to Luin. She’d told him the story—one he was surprised existed in its current state, given that many of the old legends and folk stories were attributed to the Goddess now—and they’d begun taking turns after that. Luin was a center of trade in the area, and Anna had been a merchant’s daughter, so she spoke to everyone and she’d absorbed it like a sponge.

Anna laughed every night as they settled into their bedrolls. She called it storytime, like they were children.

He’d mentioned it to her once that he didn’t have bedtime stories. Perhaps he had, and they had stopped before he’d been old enough to remember. Anna had curled him closer to her that night, and told him of her and her sister lighting lamps and sharing scary stories, or her father’s gift of making the action seem so real that it had them on the edge of their seats. Her mother had had her doubts about them being suitable stories for putting children to sleep, but he’d only laughed and responded that bedtime stories were for hope and good dreams instead of falling asleep easily.

So she’d said she’d tell him a bedtime story whenever he wanted one. And he’d offered to do the same.

“Between the two of us,” she said, shifting in place. It was getting harder and harder for her to sleep comfortably with her growing belly. “We’ll have quite the library for the kid.”

He pressed his lips to the crown of her head, inhaling the scent of her beneath road-dust and sweat. The safehouse taken from the Renegades was nearly done being repaired. There would be no reasons for Desians to go looking there again, not when they were sure that they’d demolished it and the people inside.

It could be a home for them. Somewhere safe enough to settle for at least a few years maybe. He was doubtful that they’d be safe there forever—he wasn’t that lucky—but perhaps enough for at least the first year or so of the child’s life. Enough for Anna to recover from the birth and let them both rest from the road for awhile.

Being a father had never been something he’d thought of. A relationship, a marriage—those had been discussed and teased about, had been dreamed of. But the thought of fatherhood had never extended from that. What did Kratos know about being a father, except that he wanted to be nothing like his own?

When Anna spoke of their child, of the things they would do with them, it didn’t sound like such an alien concept. It sounded nice, like something he knew how to want. Once, he’d been someone who Martel would have been so proud to call an uncle to her child, would have felt absolutely comfortable leaving them in his care. He could be that person again. He wanted to be that man again, for Anna and for their child. After all, parenthood was much less terrifying when he wasn’t going to be alone. And he wouldn’t let Anna do this alone either. That had been their deal, when they’d decided that this baby was something they wanted.

“You’re thinking very loudly,” she said, biting him gently in reprimand.

“My apologies.” He tucked the blanket more securely over her and settled himself in more comfortably. Noishe was on watch, his eyes reflecting the firelight. “You are simply worth thinking about.”

She snorted. “The man learns how to flirt after he marries me.”

“No one else worth learning for.”

“Oh my Goddess, shut up so I can sleep.”

Snickering, he idly scratched her shoulderblades in apology as he let his mind go quiet, syncing his breathing to hers as he fell asleep.