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Yuuji doesn’t know Okkotsu Yuuta, but he’s heard so much about him that he feels like he practically knows him. When news comes that he’ll be returning to the school in a week, the frenzy of excitement is as if a celebrity is coming to visit, the second years can’t help talking about him.
“He’s a skilled fighter, rivaled only by me.” Maki tells Yuuji at the track before promptly laying him out on his ass. “Both in hand-to-hand and armed combat”
“His cursed energy is insane, he could take out whole armies on his own.” Panda notes at breakfast, making a wide sweeping gesture that nearly knocks over his bowl.
“Tuna Mayo.” Inumaki adds, which makes Megumi blush red. Yuuji elbows him and whispers “What’d he say?” because he’s too embarrassed to admit that he hasn’t mastered decoding Inumaki’s special way of speaking.
“Okkotsu-senpai is very handsome.” Megumi translates, trying to hide his blush in the collar of his uniform.
“Salmon!”
“Hot.” Megumi corrects himself, which makes Inumaki beam.
“What do you think of Okkotsu, Fushiguro?” Yuuji asks while they sit outside during a water break. Megumi shrugs lightly before sipping from his water bottle.
“He’s the only second year I respect.” He says lightly, wiping sweat from his brow. Yuuji hums, wondering what that could possibly mean, but it’s high praise coming from Megumi. He hardly respects anyone, including Gojo. For some reason, that thought makes something twist in Yuuji’s stomach, something he can’t place. His face feels hot, and his throat feels prickly. What would Megumi say if someone asked him about Yuuji? Probably not that he respects him. He doesn’t want to follow this line of thinking, because something tells him it’s only going to worsen the pit in his stomach, so he packs that box up and tucks it in the very back of his brain.
However, there is no escaping the topic of Okkotsu Yuuta.
Movie night is every Friday, hosted in Yuuji’s room. Megumi, Nobara, and Yuuji all pile onto his bed and watch whatever the designated picker picks that week. This week is Yuuji’s turn, and he thought he’d picked something Nobara would like - some romcom with a cheeky love interest - but twenty minutes in she realized seen it before and they all quickly lose interest. So instead, their movie night is derailed into the latest gossip around school.
“I think Maki has a crush on Okkotsu.” Nobara starts, though she doesn’t look happy to be sharing this bit of information. “She keeps bringing him up in this way that she thinks is sly, but is totally not.” She crosses her arms with a huff, and Megumi hums in acknowledgement.
“You’re just jealous because you have a crush on Maki.” Yuuji points out with a devious grin. “If she was talking about you nonstop, you wouldn’t be complaining.” Megumi is squished in the middle of this conversation, leaning back so the other two can talk over him. He looks between them unamused, less enthusiastic about a gossip session than his peers.
Nobara bristles.
“Inumaki has a crush on him too!” She adds quickly, making Yuuji gasp.
“How do you know?” Yuuji asks with wide eyes. Are crushes that easy to figure out? He didn’t know anyone had a crush on Okkotsu. Is he that out of the loop?
“Please, the first thing he said about the guy is that he’s hot. Right, Fushiguro?” Megumi averts his eyes, red blossoming on his cheeks and ears.
“Something like that.” He mumbles. Yuuji can’t help staring, nearly gawking, at his normally stoic friend. There he is blushing again at the mention of Okkotsu’s looks. It can’t possibly be a coincidence, right? Yuuji’s stomach clenches again, knotting itself into an anxious mess. What is he so worried about? Why does he care if Megumi gets embarrassed talking about Okkotsu? That box that Yuuji had tucked into the back of his mind was now slipping closer and closer to the surface, demanding his attention.
Nobara pinches and pulls Megumi’s cheek. “What’s all the blushing about? Don’t tell me you have a crush on Okkotsu, too!”
Yuuji’s stomach drops. Apparently that’s what he was anxious about. The box springs open.
Nobara is grinning wickedly with her accusation and a beat of silence settles in the room while they wait for Megumi to deny it but he only blushes further, dipping his head down as if he could somehow hide. The quiet is damning.
“Megumi!” Nobara shrieks with delight, clasping her hands together as if this is the best piece of gossip she’s ever heard. Megumi bats her away, wincing at her high pitched cry.
“Not anymore, ok? Just when I first met him, back before I was even enrolled here. Gojo really talked him up and I was fourteen and easily impressed. It’s not a big deal.” He tugs at the collar of his t-shirt, as if he might be able to shield his face in it like he sometimes does with the collar of his uniform when he’s trying to hide his expression.
Yuuji’s stomach is still doing weird things. It twists at the knowledge that Megumi had a crush, even had in the past tense. Something sickly travels up his chest, making everything ache. He feels like his heart is made of lead and something prickles at the back of his throat, and something like disappointment settles bitterly on his tongue. Megumi’s impossibly green eyes flicker to Yuuji’s, but his expression is difficult to read beyond the obvious embarrassment.
“Yeah, first crushes don’t mean anything once you get over them.” Yuuji tries in Megumi’s defense, looking at Nobara with a shrug. He says it trying to convince himself, as well. “Like Fushiguro said, it’s not a big deal. My first crush was Melonpanna so no judgments from me.”
Nobara doesn’t take the bait. “I can’t believe everyone here is thirsting after someone I’ve never even met.” She jabs a finger into Yuuji’s side. “If you have a crush on him too, you better tell me! That would be like half the damn school!”
Yuuji laughs, holding up his hands to placate her.
“No, not me, I don’t even- I mean, I don’t really-” He tries to get the words out, but his mind is still occupied by Megumi and the fact he used to have a crush on their powerful, attractive senpai.
“He doesn’t like guys.” Megumi cuts in flatly, talking directly to Nobara. “Tall girls. Big asses. Remember?”
Yuuji balks at him. He can’t believe Megumi would weaponize his taste in women like that. Yes he likes tall women, and appreciates a plump posterior, but that’s not all he likes. He likes short girls too, and skinny girls without curves. In fact most girls are good in his book so long as they’re kind and compassionate. And more recently, he’s starting to think maybe it’s not just girls too, because the way his stomach has been acting around Megumi…
“Ugh, men are the worst.” Nobara complains to Megumi, as if Yuuji isn’t part of the conversation anymore. “I don’t know how you like them.” Megumi supplies a shrug.
"Somebody's got to.” He sighs. Yuuji’s heart isn’t lead anymore. It’s concrete, it’s brick, it's the heaviest substance known to man (he’d have to look it up later) and it’s sinking into his diaphragm.
“Actually-” Yuuji starts, trying to amend the facts. Maybe he does like men! They shouldn’t assume things about him so quickly before he has time to respond, but Nobara cuts him off. She holds her phone up to indicate the late time.
“I’d love to stay up and gossip with you ladies, but I have a ten step skin care routine, so I need to get back to my dorm.” She crawls over their legs and slides off the bed. “We should think about going out tomorrow, just let me know when you guys get up.” She notes lazily while walking out the door.
Yuuji turns his attention back to Megumi. Should he still correct him? Nerves are starting to set in now that it’s just the two of them. What would Megumi think if he just floated the idea of being bisexual when it’s just them? Would that be indicative of something? And he doesn’t even know for sure he’s bisexual, he’s just noticed all of the sudden that he feels a certain way about Megumi liking someone else. Someone who isn’t him. And when he puts it that way, he gets a goopy sort of feeling like maybe he has a crush on his best friend. But wouldn’t it be too obvious to tell Megumi suddenly that he thinks he might be bisexual? Would he assume he’s coming out so he can confess to him? And what if he’s wrong and he’s not bisexual he just really really likes Megumi? Just really intensely. And in a totally normal heterosexual way.
Megumi is looking up at the ceiling, unaware of Yuuji’s spiraling. “That was mortifying.” He groans, scrubbing a hand over his face.
“What was?” Yuuji sits up, snapping himself out of his…bisexual awakening?
“I’ve never told anyone that I had a crush on Okkotsu-senpai. It’s just so-” Megumi grimaces. Yuuji nods in understanding.
“Well, your secret’s safe with me. I can’t promise anything about Kugasaki, though.”
Megumi huffs out a laugh and his emerald eyes are on Yuuji again. Megumi’s eyes are a never ending forest, the depths of darkened waters, a vibrant field in summer - Yuuji could gaze at them until the end of time and still not feel satisfied. They hold eye contact for a glorious moment and Yuuji’s heart suddenly feels lighter, his stomach less knotted up. Yuuji decides to be brave.
“About what you said, that I only like tall girls with big asses…” Yuuji breaks their eye contact to pick at the fabric of his blanket, his mind reeling. “That’s not totally true…” He takes a deep breath. He can do this. He can lay out something that he’s only just recently discovered about himself within the last half hour. “...I like all kinds of girls. Don’t just box me in, dude.” Ok, he’s a coward.
“I see.” Megumi says in that horribly neutral monotone. They sit in silence while Yuuji mentally admonishes himself for chickening out. “I should probably go back to my room, too.” Megumi says finally, clambering out of bed. Yuuji rubs the back of his neck sheepishly and tries to laugh it off.
“Right, of course.” Yuuji watches Megumi head towards the door, but he lingers at the threshold, as if he’s waiting for something. He turns to look at Yuuji over his shoulder.
“Don’t be too intimidated by Okkotsu-senpai. I know everyone’s talking about him like he’s the next Gojo, but he’s very humble and kind.” Megumi quirks a smile. Yuuji’s blood runs cold. Is this crush in the past tense or not? He’s suddenly getting mixed signals. How is he supposed to be not intimidated when Megumi smiles like that when he talks about him? How is Yuuji supposed to take that as anything, but Megumi harboring feelings for the guy? Megumi must not notice how all the blood has rushed out of Yuuji’s face, because he simply turns away and shuts the door.
“Good night, Itadori.”
The days pass in a wonder of discovery for Itadori Yuuji. He takes about a hundred different “What’s my sexuality?” quizzes and finds he consistently falls somewhere in the bisexual/pansexual area. He scrolls through the instagram feeds fo male models and athletes, seeing if anyone sparks his interest and realizes that he’s not attracted to all men. He also starts paying more attention to Megumi, and the more he watches him, the more he realizes that he’s not only definitely bisexual, but he definitely has feelings for his best friend.
Yuuji does his best not to be obvious when he observes Megumi, but it’s like every little thing Megumi does attracts his attention. The way he chews on his pen when he’s deep in thought, the way he smiles ever so slightly right before he takes a first sip of coffee, the way he rests his hands in divine dog formation when he isn’t paying attention. Maybe this is truly the first time he’s had a crush on someone, because this is so intense, taking up all corners of his mind and nobody has ever done that to him before. Maybe what he thought were crushes were merely passing interest, and this is what regular people feel when they have crushes. No wonder Megumi was embarrassed to have his crush on Okkotsu outed.
It’s a little after noon when Yuuta arrives at Jujutsu Tech, surprising his classmates while they’re training on the track field. Yuuji doesn’t even realize anyone’s there (far too distracted watching Megumi as he sparred against Maki) until Panda roars with excitement. Inumaki and Panda immediately rush him while Yuuji watches from the bleachers, Nobara sitting beside him gulping from her water bottle.
“The famous Okkotsu.” She whistles, nudging Yuuji with her elbow. He nudges her back and stands up to greet him. Sure, he has a sour taste in his mouth at the idea of meeting someone that Megumi had a romantic interest in, but that wasn’t Okkotsu’s fault. He can’t help being perfect in every conceivable way. Yuuji can handle being nice to someone he’s extremely jealous of. He can absolutely play it cool. Okkotsu strides up the bleachers with a soft smile, offering a wave to Nobara and Yuuji.
“Our first years!” He greets in a voice much softer than Yuuji was expecting. “Panda said I have to meet you guys. I’ve heard you’re all really strong.”
Okkotsu is three inches taller than Yuuji. He has dark hair and soulful eyes and he smiles with all his teeth, which are perfect and white. Yuuji hates that he can immediately tell what attracted Megumi to him, and that’s before even seeing what his technique is like. Nobara is the first to smile back, introducing herself and Yuuji.
“Itadori Yuuji!” Okkotsu meets his eyes with a sparkle. “Gojo’s told me so much about you. You’re kind of a special case, too.” He laughs and Yuuji laughs along with him, though his sounds more forced. Okktosu turns to look out on the field where Maki and Megumi are still clashing weapons. Even from where they’re standing, Yuuji can see the sweat dripping down Megumi’s neck, his hair sticking to his forehead, his breath coming out rough. For a moment, he forgets about being jealous of Okkotsu.
“Maki!” Okkotsu cups his hands around his mouth to get her attention, but she doesn’t look up. Instead, she makes a quick sweep for Megumi’s legs with her bowstaff, slamming him to the ground in a swift motion. Resting a foot on his chest, she looks up at Okkotsu and grins.
“You finally showed up!” She calls back, jogging away from the field to meet up with them. Megumi lays motionless on the ground for a second, catching his breath, but eventually pulls himself up. He follows after her sluggishly, and Yuuji meets him at the step of the bleachers with a bottle of water. Megumi utters a breathy thanks before tilting his head back and taking a desperate drink. Water spills out the corner of his lips, dribbling down his chin and trailing down his neck. Yuuji follows the path, his mouth suddenly dry.
“How are you guys doing? Fushiguro, your form has improved since I last saw you.”
Megumi dries his face with the back of his hand and offers a tired smile. Megumi never smiles. And is his face red because he’s exhausted or because he’s being reunited with his first crush? Yuuji feels hot, his heart clenching with an ugly sensation as his eyes dart between the two.
“That doesn’t mean a whole lot considering she still beats my ass.” Megumi shrugs, making Maki laugh. “And you haven’t seen me fight in a whole year. There’s bound to be some improvements.”
“Don’t be modest!” Okkotsu slaps a hand on his shoulder. “I bet you could toss me around.”
Yuuji zeroes in on the point of contact and he feels like he’s going to hurl. If this is what having a crush is like, it's awful. It’s all consuming and it makes his body react in horrible ways he can’t control, and if he can’t get ahold of himself soon he’s going to explode.
“Have you had lunch yet?” Panda asks, Inumaki standing at his side with his arms crossed. He looks just as focused on the contact as Yuuji, his expression more stern than Yuuji has ever seen him before. The second year has always been a little too observant for his own good. Yuuta shakes his head at the question.
“I can take you all out somewhere!” Yuuta suggests with a grin. “What good is the special grade salary if I can’t spend it on my friends.” The small crowd murmurs in agreement, but Yuuji’s still wrestling with his discomfort. He’s pretty sure he can’t sit through a whole meal of Megumi gazing at Okkotsu with admiration and overanalyzing every interaction the two share.
“You guys go on without me, I’m gonna stay back. I think the heat is getting to me.” Yuuji rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. Megumi frowns and feels his forehead.
“I guess you do feel kind of sweaty.” He admits, but his eyes say he isn’t convinced.
“Ah, we’ll miss you.” Yuuta’s smile falters a little, but soon the group heads towards the campus entrance to fill a couple cars out to the city. Left alone, Yuuji covers his face and yells into his hands.
Typically, if Yuuji needs to talk to someone, he talks to Megumi. However, the unfortunate truth about having a crush on Megumi is that he can’t talk to Megumi about it. He wanders the campus ruminating on that fact until he comes across someone that could probably lend a somewhat compassionate ear. Gojo is sitting on the steps outside of the dorms, looking at his phone with an expression Yuuji can’t read through his blindfold. Silently, Yuuji approaches and sits next to Gojo. His sensei looks over at him with a smile.
“Yuuji! You look a little lost.” He points out correctly. “Didn’t feel like going out with everyone else?”
Yuuji almost wants to ask how he knows the rest of the school is out to lunch with Yuuta, but he knows it’s pointless. Gojo pretty much knows everything.
“Gojo, how do you know if someone has a crush on someone else?”
Gojo looks a little stunned at the question. However, this only lasts for a second before he throws his head back in a laugh. He slaps Yuuji on the back and sighs to himself.
“Ah, young love. It seems so much more complicated than it should be, right?”
This does little to make Yuuji feel better, but he nods glumly.
“I guess they spend a lot of time talking about that person, or staring at them. Does this have anything to do with how you’ve been obsessing over Megumi these past few days?”
Yuuji’s face is immediately red. Has he been that obvious? He likes to think he was at least a little subtle in his infatuation, but apparently not. Does this mean other people know too? Does Megumi know? Yuuji groans and scrubs his face with his hands.
“Oh don’t be embarrassed.” Gojo chides. “It’s perfectly natural at your age!”
“It’s not me. It’s Fushiguro. Do you think he still has a crush on Okkotsu?” Yuuji looks up at Gojo through glassy eyes, silently begging him to give him the answer he wants to hear. Instead, Gojo chuckles.
“Still?” He repeats, tapping his chin with a thoughtful finger. Apparently Gojo doesn’t know everything and Yuuji winces, giving Megumi a silent apology for giving Gojo a new way to antagonize him.
“Well, I can’t say for sure. He doesn’t really talk about him, and Yuuta has been abroad this whole time, so it’s not like he can obsess over him in person.” Gojo looks back to Yuuji with a sly smile. “But you’re not asking this because you’re curious, are you. You’re wondering if Megumi has a crush on you.”
Yuuji puts his hands up defensively, his red face somehow becoming redder. “What, no, that’s ridiculous, I just-”
“Yuuji, don’t be silly. I’ve bet you’ve counted his eyelashes at this point.”
Yuuji hides his face in his hands. He’s right. 149.
“I really think that’s for Megumi to tell you and not me.” Gojo answers with that stupid sly smile. It spreads into a cheeky grin. “If you’re just honest about your feelings you’ll know for sure.”
“I can’t do that!” Yuuji’s voice is muffled. “He doesn’t even know I like guys.”
“I guess you could always start there.” Gojo points out. Yuuji huffs out a sigh. He’s not wrong. “It will all work itself out, it always does.” He;s being too cryptic for Yuuji’s liking so he simply nods his head as if he’s been offered any solid advice. He stands up to go to his room and scream into his pillow, but Gojo stops him.
“Don’t drive yourself crazy thinking about it too much. It’s never really as complicated as it seems.”
Yuuji nods, not really sure what that’s supposed to mean, and wanders into the dorms. He gets in that long needed pillow scream, listens to music at full volume, and tries to distract himself with video games.
By the time the group comes back to lunch, Yuuji is sitting under a tree outside, scrolling through his phone and trying to decompress with some fresh air. Nothing was really making him feel better. The sun is beating down on his face, and Yuuji has to scrunch his eyes to look at the screen of his phone, but suddenly a shadow blocks it. He looks up and is immediately greeted by a fluffy white rabbit. It dangles in front of him, Megumi holding it by the scruff in silent offering. Yuuji lets his phone drop to the ground as he reaches out and takes hold of the rabbit, cradling it in his lap while he pet through its velvet soft ears. Its nose twitches and it nuzzles into his hands.
“You look like you need something to cuddle.” Megumi explains, still standing, still blocking the sun from Yuuji’s eyes. Yuuji smiles for the first time since the group left for lunch and shrugs to himself. “Are you ok? You’ve been acting weird lately.”
Yuuji wiggles his nose, imitating the rabbit. He thinks back to what Gojo said, how coming out might be a good way to start. Mindlessly stroking the little animal, Yuuji stares at it, avoiding his best friend’s gaze.
“How’d you know you’re gay?” He asked casually, trying not to make a big deal out of it. He steals a glance of Megumi’s face. He looks like he wasn’t expecting that question, but he doesn’t look annoyed, which was a good start. Megumi sits down next to him, but holds his hand up to keep the sun from Yuuji’s eyes.
“I don’t know. I guess I always kind of knew. Boys would try to kiss girls during playtime, and it never really appealed to me.” Megumi shrugs, watching Yuuji’s hands as his fingers run through pure white fur. Yuuji nods, still looking away. Yuuji’s always known he likes girls. That was just a given. They’re soft and pretty and the idea of holding a girl’s hand always had him grinning like a maniac. The idea that boys are also an option had never crossed his mind until Megumi. But also, his thoughts are really only about Megumi. Other guys don’t seem as interesting, he can’t imagine himself holding their hands or kissing them. Fuck, he wants to kiss Megumi.
“Why do you ask?” Megumi nudges Yuuji’s shoulder with his own and Yuuji takes a deep breath. How does he explain that Megumi has made him question sexuality without letting Megumi know it’s him? Or maybe he should just leave it open ended. Some mysterious man who is smart and thoughtful and has green eyes that he’d like to stare into until he melts away into nothing. Sure, that sounds believable.
“I’ve started questioning if I really only like girls. Like, there’s a guy that I like all of the sudden and it’s like this whole world has opened up to me and I don’t know what to think.” Nervously, Yuuji turns to look at Megumi, who’s watching him intently. His jade eyes meet his honey brown and Yuuji immediately feels heat rise to his cheeks. He tries to hide his face in the rabbit in his lap, but it’s little use. His ears are red too.
“It’s not bad to question your sexuality, Yuuji.” Megumi informs him calmly, a gentle hand resting on his back. Yuuji stiffens at the touch, but only for a second. Megumi has never touched him before, not outside of smacking him for being stupid or sparring during training sessions. Sure, Yuuji would lean on him and hug him and generally touch on him whenever he felt like it (Oh god, has he liked Megumi this entire time?!?), but Megumi was not one to initiate it. He rubs soft circles into the back of Yuuji’s sweatshirt, and Yuuji relaxes, sighing out all his anxiety. Maybe Gojo was right. Maybe he’s overthinking it.
“I know that. I’m not homophobic or anything, it’s just a weird revelation to have, ya know? Like, have I been this way the whole time and didn’t know it? Or did one person give me an actual sexual awakening?” Yuuji speaks into the rabbit and the vibration makes it ruffle its fur. It turns around in his arms until it’s facing him and begins to lick at his nose. The rabbit’s tongue is soft, and it feels like a tiny kiss against his skin. He’s definitely starting to feel better.
“Does it matter if you’ve liked guys this whole time and didn’t know it?” Megumi asks. “I think you should focus on what you’re feeling now instead of spiraling over the past. You can always think about that later.”
Megumi is so smart. Yuuji closes his eyes and sits up again, his head resting against the tree. It was easier to have this conversation without outright looking at Megumi. If he just listens to his voice and that’s it, he won’t accidentally blurt out that he has feelings for him and has been thinking about kissing him nonstop since the thought entered his mind.
However, Yuuji is his own worst enemy, because he opens his eyes and looks at Megumi anyways. Megumi’s features look soft in the sunlight, his green eyes looking lighter under golden rays. His eyes remind him of early spring, when the grass is starting to poke its way out of the ground past the melting snow. A subtle breeze makes Megumi’s unruly black hair billow out of his face so that Yuuji can see him without distraction. He’s breathtakingly beautiful. Why did it take so long for Yuuji to realize it? To realize that he likes him more than as just a friend? These feelings definitely weren’t new, they’d just been unearthed, sitting just below the surface. How long has it been?
“Was Okkotsu your first crush?” Yuuji asks in a whisper. The rabbit stiffens in his arms and chews on his thumb lightly. Not hard enough to break skin, but definitely warning him that it has teeth.
“Yeah,” Megumi admits, lowering his hand as some clouds block out the sun. “But I knew I liked guys before him.”
“And what about after him? Have you liked someone since?” Yuuji doesn’t know why he asked it, but it’s the first thing out of his mouth. The rabbit is no longer chewing on him, instead it's licking his thumb with that soft pink tongue. Its face nuzzles into his palm even though Yuuji is still petting it. What does it want? Why is it acting up all of the sudden?
Pink tinges Megumi’s cheeks, and Yuuji is reminded of how he looked when he told them about his crush on Okkotsu. So before he even mutters “Yeah,” Yuuji knows the answer. A mix of jealousy and disappointment settles into his gut, deflating any bit of confidence that Yuuji had. Of course he likes someone else. It’s not like he can expect Megumi to just close his eyes any time he’s around a man. He wonders who it is this time. Maybe Nanami - he’s handsome and strong, and he’s serious in a way that Megumi might like. Or maybe Inumaki. Inumaki has beautiful eyes and he’s silly and even though he doesn’t talk much, Megumi seems to understand him.
“Who?” Yuuji’s voice quivers, pausing in his movements and the rabbit doesn’t seem to appreciate it. It's restless in his arms, paws digging into his lap and ears twitching wildly. Yuuji wasn’t aware that Megumi’s shikigami could be so moody, so he starts petting it again, but that doesn’t seem to help calm it down.
“It’s stupid.” Megumi says flatly, dissolving the rabbit into a mist of shadows. “And I don’t know why I’m even talking about it. It has nothing to do with you figuring out you’re gay.”
Yuuji sours, crossing his arms. “Maybe it does. Maybe if we have a crush on the same person it would be easier to talk about.” He really wants to know who Megumi is interested in. Megumi rolls his eyes.
“We don’t have a crush on the same person, trust me.”
Yuuji scoffs. “How would you know? Are you just trying to throw me off? Scared I might steal him away from you?” Maybe Megumi is the jealous type, too. If Yuuji was a pettier person, he’d find out who this guy was and try to make Megumi suffer in the way he’s been this whole time. But he could never go through with something like that. It’s not Megumi’s fault that Yuuji is pathetically in love with him. In love? Yuuji tries to shake that thought from his mind. No, he can’t go from discovering he likes boys, to discovering he likes Megumi, to discovering he’s in love in a matter of a few days. That’s not allowed.
“What about you? Why don’t you tell me who your crush is and I’ll just confirm or deny if it’s the same one I have.” Megumi narrows his eyes in a way that Yuuji is incredibly familiar with. He’s annoyed. Yuuji forces out a laugh that comes out much more nervous than he intends it to.
“No, no, that’s not important.” What sort of god would put Yuuji on this Earth and forget to give him the ability to lie? “I don’t think you’d know him anyways, he goes to another school.”
Megumi pinches the bridge of his nose in exasperation.
“Don’t tell me you have a crush on someone from the Kyoto school. I’ll lose all respect for you if you say it’s Todo.”
“What?! NO!” Yuuji is just stunned enough to not laugh, but the idea is laughable. Though, maybe a fake crush is the way to go. Despite Yuuji’s inability to lie. He decides to go for it anyways. A brilliant solution.
“It’s, uh,” Yuuji quickly runs through all the Kyoto students he can remember. Oh god, they only have like three guys to choose from. “Uh, Kamo. The one who doesn’t open his eyes.” Yuuji says quickly, his eyes still pointed upward in thought. Megumi stares at him in disbelief.
“You have a crush on Kamo?” He repeats with a failing monotone. A smirk quirks his lips and it almost sounds like he wants to laugh? Yuuji is a little offended that Megumi would dare to laugh at his fake crush. What if he was being serious right now? What if Yuuji came out to Megumi and then admitted to having a crush on Kamo? Ok, it sounded a little ridiculous, but STILL! Megumi is being a bad friend.
“Yes, I do! And I don’t know what you think is so funny about it!”
“What’s his given name?” Megumi asks, the smirk growing a little wider. Yuuji’s eyes widen and he opens his mouth. Nothing comes out. Fuck, what’s his name??? “Thought so.” Megumi snickers, not bothering to wait more than a beat of silence to confirm his suspicions. Yuuji’s face is red again and he tries not to look too put off that he was caught so easily.
“It doesn’t matter who I have a crush on, anyways. He likes someone else, so there’s nothing to do about it.” Yuuji sighs, rubbing at his eyes. Megumi hums.
“How do you know he likes someone else?”
“He told me.” Yuuji feels like he’s being pretty sly. It’s easier to tell half truths like this, and maybe Megumi will admit who he likes if he thinks Yuuji’s already given up on his crush. He almost wants to rub his hands together at this genius plan. Megumi’s eyes narrow again, but he isn’t annoyed. He’s…suspicious? Yuuji has gotten to know Megumi pretty well over the past few months, and he’s gotten pretty good at reading the subtleties of his face, but this expression doesn't seem right.
“Yeah, well, maybe my crush likes someone else too.” Megumi says pointedly. Yuuji furrows his brow. Who could possibly have a crush on someone else when Megumi is an option? What a dumbass this guy is.
“I’m sorry, dude. That sucks.” Yuuji murmurs, frowning.
“It’s fine. My crush is kind of an idiot, so I don’t think his crush will last very long.” Megumi fidgets with the hem of his uniform, his face twisting in a way that Yuuji wasn’t familiar with. Yuuji nudges him with his shoulder.
“Well, he’s an idiot if he doesn’t like you.” Yuuji says, even though he doesn’t really want to encourage this infatuation. But he’d rather Megumi be happy with someone else than be sad with him. Megumi huffs out a laugh.
“I don’t think so. I’m not really his type.”
“How could you not be his type? You’re smart and passionate and you care deeply about the people you care about.” Yuuji’s talking faster than his mind can keep up with, doesn’t realize how revealing his words are. “You are a total badass, and you always seem like you know what you’re doing even when you don’t. You are a lot kinder than people give you credit for and you’re loyal and a fast learner and-” Before Yuuji can say anything else, he’s cut off with a kiss. A kiss from Megumi. Megumi is kissing him.
It takes a second for his brain to catch up with what’s happening. One second he was talking and the next, Megumi has pulled Yuuji close to him and pressed his lips against his. He’s short circuiting, somehow reality got mixed up with his fantasies and he must be hallucinating. Except seconds pass and Megumi is still pressed against him. Ok, if this is all fantasy, Yuuji can go along with it. He’ll just do what he does in his imagination. He kisses back.
Megumi is warm and soft, and he smells even better up close than he does standing next to him. Time slows down and suddenly it’s just them and the only thing that matters is this kiss. Yuuji cups Megumi’s cheek, keeps his face near and he can feel Megumi smile against his lips. Fantasy Megumi never did that. And fantasy Megumi never sighed before pulling away. Yuuji blinks a few times. This was real. This was real and he and Megumi kissed for real. Megumi rests his forehead against Yuuji’s, their noses brushing lightly.
“You’re my crush, idiot.” He confesses, hot air licking against Yuuji’s lips. Yuuji bursts into a smile, but he also feels close to tears. The conversation replays in his head and suddenly Yuuji really feels like an idiot. No wonder he hadn’t figured out he was bisexual before if he was really this oblivious.
“You’re my crush too!” Yuuji says back, pulling Megumi in for another kiss. They’re both smiling this time, and Yuuji can’t help himself, he kisses more than Megumi’s lips. He kisses his cheeks and his nose and his chin. He wants to kiss every inch of his skin until Megumi knows just how much he likes him. (No, he still won’t address love) Megumi laughs (!!!) and tries to pull away but Yuuji wraps his arms around him and chases after him.
“You can’t tell me you like me and then push me away!” He whines between kisses, and Megumi snorts, wriggling against him.
“What if people see us?” Megumi asks shyly, his face beginning to flush again.
“Fuck ‘em. They’ll know eventually when I give you the biggest nastiest hickey on your neck.” Yuuji is kissing down his jaw and Megumi yelps.
“Yuuji!”
“This is what you get for having a crush on an idiot.”
“Apparently.”