Work Text:
Your phone buzzes. It was Nick Amaro, your partner at SVU. You two had been partners for 3 years. Plenty of time for you guys to warm up to each other. He was going through a difficult divorce and leaned on you, multiple times. But, you didn't mind. It was nice knowing he trusted you. You hung out with him at the bar while he took drink after drink, barely even able to function properly afterwards. He'd call you with a massive headache and a hangover the next morning. You'd answer with a bright smile. That was until a little while ago, his divorce finalized and he stopped asking you to go to bars with him much; he still went just not as often. You went over and had beers with him, even though the beer had a sour aftertaste.
You realized halfway through the divorce his way of decompressing after work; besides the occasional drinks. He would take off his coat and shoes. He would sit on the couch in a specific spot. The couch’s very visible indent where his behind pressed against fit him perfectly. He would sit back, wishing he had a beer in his hand. You watched from the kitchen as he waited until 10 pm to turn the channel to a certain show. It didn't take long for it to turn 10, you guys were out until 9:30 most nights. You cleaned his kitchen slightly and sat next to him on the couch, enjoying each other’s presence. You two would talk about anything else you already didn't talk about earlier.
"You know, you don't have to stay." He'd blurt out. You would pat his shoulder and say, "I know. I'm staying because I want to stay." A smile pulled on his face and you smiled back. Around 11, you'd leave. Your heart raced every time you said bye, as if it didn't want the moment to end. But what moment was there? Two friends hanging out? A friend helping another friend through a tough time? You always overthought it on the way home every time.
At work, Nick would crack an inside joke between the two of you in front of the squad, not realizing they wouldn't understand. He laughed and you giggled, receiving eye rolls from everyone else. Your long car rides out of state felt like minutes with him. You two would laugh the entire time , not leaving any room for talking about the case you were working on. He would let you sleep when needed, driving the entire way there and back. He watched as you peacefully slept against the cold window. He smiled to himself every time.
He would always get your cup of coffee exactly how you wanted. "Nick, you always get it right. Every time. How? I can't even remember how many packets of sugar I put in." You perplexed while walking to the squad car. He smiled that same smile he flashed at others. "Magic." he whispered, getting in the driver's side. He never let you drive. You thought it was because the one time you did, you guys almost crashed and nearly wrecked the car. He reminds you every time you ask to drive. That’s mainly it though: he needs to make sure you’re safe on the roads. Your driving scares him— and everyone on the squad. But, it’s more than that. Something tightens in his chest when he sees you reach towards the steering wheel. He doesn’t know where this feeling came from, it just takes over when you’re on the streets. It’s like a protective instinct, over his own partner. All he knows is that he doesn’t want to lose you.
Every day, Rollins would ramble on about your relationship with Nick. "He doesn't act that way with other people, you know." You shrugged it off, like you did with all her comments. You and Nick were friends, close friends. Partners in crime, or solving crime if you wanted to take it literally. Rollins would click her tongue. She knew Nick and his actions. Those were the actions of a man who liked a girl. She'd coo at you after he whispered in your ear a joke to make you laugh. You would playfully shove her.
Every day, Nick assured Carisi and Fin about your platonic relationship together. "I don't know, Nicky boy. You look at her like she's different." Carisi said. Nick's face twisted in irritation. "Well, obviously she's different." He blushed, trying to hide the excitement in his voice. "And, it's nice to have a close friend you know you can lean on." Fin wasn't believing it. He patted Nick's back and left the break room, mumbling about how he would see it soon.
Carisi even brought Barba into the conversation. "Why would I care about Amaro's love life?" Barba's face scrunched up. Nick pointed towards his fellow Cuban in agreement. "It's about him and Y/N." Fin spoke from the doorway. Barba immediately stood taller, leaning forward in interest. Nick rolled his eyes, his large hands running over his face. "You're totally in love with her, and it's so hard not to notice." Great, Barba thought he liked you. "Mira, you just have to be careful about how you ask her out." Nick didn't hear the rest of his advice because he walked out and sat at his desk, across from yours.
"My mom is coming over." You told him in the car. He looked at you, a surprised look on his face. "What? Is it that hard to believe that my mom is coming for
Chicago?" You giggled and his face slowly rolled into a smile. "I've just never took her around New York." You looked out the window. The relationship between you and your mother wasn't bad, but it obviously wouldn't be perfect. She hated it when you left for New York. It wasn't her preferred choice; she wanted her chiquita to stay with the family. "I think," he paused, waiting at a red light. "You should take her around the precinct. Meet everyone. Who knows, maybe Barba might be around and charm her. Que fácil es para el encantar la gente." He knew you spoke spanish. Just didn't know if it came to you or not. "Pues, fue fácil para mi mami caer en eso." you responded. You always responded fast tongued when you two spoke spanish. The squad never understood, as they didn't speak much. Nick laughed at your comment.
One day, it was a tough day at work. You were dealing with a lot with your family and didn't tell anyone at work. Why should you? It's your business. The minute you sit down, Nick questions you. "You okay?" he'd whisper. You would nod, feeling the burn of his gaze at your turned down head. An hour later, you didn't realize it until it happened. A tear slipped down your face. You wiped it away. Another one fell, making it to your paperwork. You pushed your chair backwards and headed for the bathroom, Nick watched you go. You stood in front of the sink, looking at yourself in the mirror. Splashing cold water on your face would help, surely. Right?
You walked out of the bathroom to be met with Nick. He had a concerned look on his face. "What's wrong?" he'd say in a tone that you pretended didn't make your heart skip a beat. "I'm fine." You tried walking past him until he grabbed your wrist and pulled you back to him. "No, you're not. You're not yourself. Spill it." You stifled a giggle, yet it came out unwanted. You guys said that when the other was definitely hiding something. It came from a suspect, who was clearly under the influence when you arrested him. He looked at you two sitting across from him in an interrogation room. You and Nick looked at each other. Apparently, he saw a “shared look” on both of your faces. The suspect's eyes narrowed as he told you, "Spill it." You licked your lips in confusion. Nick leaned forward, his eyebrows furrowing, the same way they did every time he was baffled. "Spill what?" he managed to get out. "You two have something. Something to say. So, spill it." The man smelled of pure weed. He swayed back and forth slowly in his chair, the handcuffs around his wrist attached to the table clanking together. Nick made up a harmless lie about the information we apparently weren't saying; how we have evidence about these crimes. "We could find evidence that links them to you." You added. The suspect's eyes widened in fright. He admitted to everything on the spot. You and Nick shared glances as the suspect wrote everything down.
"I told you, I'm fine." You wriggled your way out of his hold. You walked past your desk and picked up your coat. You headed up for the roof. Nick stood by the bathroom, hand running through his hair. He knew exactly where you were going. He wasn't going to stop you. Just going to let you cool down until he met you up there in a bit. You, in fact, did not cool down. The minute you walked through the door, hot tears streamed down your face. You couldn't stop them. Five minutes passed as you paced back and forth, running through your hair. You played with your necklace at the base of your collarbone until the door opened again. It was Nick.
"Hey." His voice still had the soft tone from earlier. "I'm sorry." He rubbed the back of his neck. The same way he did when he was ashamed. He had nothing to be ashamed for. "Stop rubbing the back of the neck, no reason to be embarrassed." You muttered. He walked forward and sat down with you on the roof, as you two did so often. He sat here with you after Maria gave him the divorce papers, telling him 'she needed to work on herself.' And he understood. It hurt but he understood. He sat here when your father had a stroke. He rubbed your back, telling you it wasn't your fault because you put in your head that it wasn't because you weren't there to take care of him. He sat there with you when his divorce was finalized. 'One last beer!' he cheered. You laughed, knowing that was a complete lie. He sat there with you when your dad passed away. He let you silently cry on his shoulder as he looked at the city skyline. It was the prettiest view he'd ever seen, besides the one sitting right next to him.
"It's my mom. She's.. forgetting things." You slowly spoke, not trying to accept it. Nick held your hand, platonically, obviously. He squeezed it and you looked up at him. You realize now that your mascara you put on that day had slightly smeared under your eyes. "Jeez, you look like you just went for a swim." He tried lightening the mood slightly. It worked. He lifted his hand to your face. A big smile plastered against your face as he tried wiping your mascara off. You laughed. That same laugh everyone does when they were just crying. "I have to go visit her. But, I don't wanna miss wo-" Nick cut you off, placing his finger against your lips. "I will handle it. You go home. Get some rest." He pulled you close to him. You leaned in, his cologne filling your nostrils. He pressed a small kiss to the top of your head. Once you finally got up, you headed back to the stairs before turning back around to a Nick Amaro standing up. "I forgot one thing." Nick tilted his head in confusion until you practically rushed into his arms, giving him a warm hug. You thanked him profusely and left out the door to inform Liv about your current situation.
2 weeks. You were gone for 2 weeks. You felt guilty for staying away from work for so long but you also suspected that if you left your family that you would feel even more guilty with that. So, you stayed. Nick called often, asking for updates. Not just about your mother but about you. You smiled on the phone, twisting your hair. Your cousin noticed the look on your face. "Who are you talking to?" She mouthed. You shrugged her off and waited to answer her when your shared phone call with Nick ended. "My partner at work." You finally answered. She had a look on her face, a don't give me that bullshit look. You reassured her that this was just your partner. Your friend. Your close friend.
But, he wasn't just your friend. You spent the time going over the details with your cousins. They begged for it. The more and more you talked about it, the more you realized how much you thought about him. "Literally you just have a big fat crush on this dude. And that's okay. Just tell him!" You rolled your eyes. You didn't believe it until one phone call. Nick had called you, to ask about your mom. You sat down on the couch and just talked. Your cousins walked past, saw your grin, and just shook their heads. How oblivious you were. Somehow, the conversation steered over to an inside joke between the two of you. "You know, you're like the only person who gets me." Nick's voice crackled over the phone. Your eyes widened. "I am?" you said, your voice quieter than you wanted it. "Yeah, we're fun together. Don't you think?" You didn't respond. Your chest got that tight feeling. The same feeling when you saw your crush in the hallways in middle school. "Hello? Y/N? Are you still there?" His voice raised in concern at the end. You licked your lips slightly. "Yeah, let me call you back." Without waiting for him to say his goodbyes, you hung up.
Eating breakfast, you thought of it. In the shower, you thought of it. It took over you. You sat down and zoned out, the feeling racing through your head. What did it mean? Did you like Nick? What would he think of it? It ate you alive. Until your family saw what it was doing to you. “Something’s bothering you. Spit it out.” They cornered you. So you told them. The times you thought there was something going on. That feeling you got during that phone call. “Oh yeah, you totally like this dude.” Your sister blurted out, breaking the calm silence after your words. Everyone nodded in agreement. “No, I don’t!” you scoffed. Everyone’s eyes looked up at you in disbelief. “Y/N, you have that smirk whenever you talk to him. You’re oblivious.” Your cousin threw her hands in the air. They all started talking over each other and you got parts of their opinions; Nick’s a good looking man, he makes you happy, he's extremely nice to you and just you. That one struck. You sat back, thinking over him. His mannerisms with you and with someone else. Totally different. “Oh my gosh, I think I like this guy.” You declared, stopping everyone’s words. Your cousin’s lips twisted into smiles. “We knew you would get it.” You bit your lip at this epiphany. Working with this guy is going to get a lot harder.
When you got back, Nick picked you up from the airport. "I missed having my buddy working on cases with me." he said as he loaded your bags in the trunk. You sighed cheerfully. He pulled out of the airport and started rambling on about working for two people as one. "It's hard enough as it is to do my own job. But, doing yours? I needed you to come back right away!" You laughed and he looked at you. Your smile. You noticed. Trying not to make it weird, you turn away.
"You smell good." You mentioned in a car ride. He pulled into a coffee shop. "It's a new cologne Zara gave me for Father's day." He didn't mention he wore it specifically for you. It was the middle of summer. He wondered how he didn't smell like body odor and cologne. The hot weather wasn't as hot as in the midwest, but you accustomed to how cold it would get that 50 degree weather was 'shorts' weather. Nick laughed every time you mentioned Chicago's weather. "You make it sound like it was horrid there every summer." You scoffed. "It was! Try playing outside one day and running inside from the rain the next. Oh, and don't get me started on winter time." You would clench up your fists in a playful rage. Nick chuckled and pushed your hands down. "Chillax, Hulk. You're on the East Coast. It's calmer here." You crossed your arms. "I prefer the West Coast." you muttered.
The fall was your favorite time of year. It was especially nice in New York. Scarfs and mini boots. You never wore that to work, though. Maybe a neutral scarf here and there. Nick would tease you, saying it wasn't easy to fight crime in mini boots. The scarf could get caught or even a suspect could grab you by it, closing your airway. But on your days off, you rocked it like you were going through a runway. Nick noticed your slight fashion change throughout the seasons. He noticed the amount of headbands you wore fluctuated throughout the year when the weather changed. It was cute. You looked good in almost everything, he thought.
Your first time undercover, it was with Nick. You two had to go to a fancy event together to catch a suspect. He put on his best tux and you finally pulled out the dress you wore to your youngest cousin's quinceañera. It was a light color, perfect on your skin color. It wasn't too shy on gems and sparkles. It accentuated your hips, you noticed. You tied back a side of your hair, leaving it down. You grabbed your keys to drive to the precinct, expecting Nick to drive the two of you from there. Instead, you were met with a knock at the door. Opening the door, Nick stared. His jaw would have fallen if he didn't compose himself properly. His eyes looked up, lasting on you every second he could. "Wow, you look. Wow." he swooned, a slight laugh to cover his flushed expression. "Shut up, Amaro. Come on, let's go." He held out his hand for you and you took it, what else would you do?
In the car, he looked at you. He studied your face carefully, examining the makeup you put on. "You look beautiful." he breathed. I beamed. "Are you just trying to make it seem easy for us to be a couple?" You looked away, still smiling. That's what you were going undercover as; a couple who got invited to this celebration. You didn't know what it was for; you just knew it was being hosted by the brother of your suspect, and you guys imagined he would attend. You pretended it didn't hurt when you would have to pretend to be a couple. Nick took your hand and placed a gentle kiss to it. "Shall we?" Your stomach fluttered. "We shall." You pulled into the valet and started walking into the banquet hall. The view into it was lovely; you noticed the massive chandelier through the clear glass window. "Look!" you pointed at the building with your vacant hand, your other hand engulfed with Nick's. "That chandelier is fucking huge." He smiled. I nodded, looking up at him as we walked through the doors.
Seeing the large light fixture in person had you infatuated. Seeing as you two had to act as a couple, Nick asked you in front of the person we handed our coats to, "When the house is finished being furnished, would you like a chandelier like that, dear?" You turned to him, confusion hitting your face for a second. Then, it twists into playing the part. "Oh, yes please! up Say you promise!" I held my pinky out, the fake ring shining against the harsh white light around. Nick hooked his finger around yours, the brightest smile you've ever seen on him before. "I promise." The worker looked at us with adoration as we walked away. The sound of Carisi and Rollins fell through our ear pieces. "What was that, freaks?" Carisi questioned with the sound of Rollins' laugh in the back. We rolled our eyes. They were watching the live footage in a van a block down from the venue through some cameras attached to your outfits.
Nick guided you to a seat at the bar. You ordered your usual, a small glass with tequila and squirt on the rocks. "Going bold with that, huh?" Nick asked, his face torn in amusement. You shrugged. The rest of the time at the bar, you didn't do much except for eavesdropping on random people's conversations in hopes of getting a lead. The suspect was nowhere to be seen and we were getting antsy.
Nick tapped you on your shoulder. "Let's go dance, so we don't draw attention to ourselves." You took his hand and walked to the floor. He looked slightly uncomfortable. His hand was steady on your waist. Your hands were crossed on his neck. "I don't think I've danced with anyone recently." He admitted. You laughed. "I mean, I know how. I just... don't do it often." You swayed with him. "Not even with Zara to practice for her quinceañera?" Before Nick could respond, Carisi coughed came through your ear pieces. Nick looked annoyed and your face rolled in confusion.
Throughout the night, you fell like there were eyes on you; people knowing you two weren't a couple. You nestled your head into Nick's neck, pulling yourself closer to him. "To really seal the deal." You told him. He nodded. At least, that's what you told yourself. To seal the deal. You have been wanted to do that for the longest time. Letting Nick hold you while you laid on him. The only time was when you practically cried in his arms. That didn't count. This time did. Your stomach fluttered every time his hands moved slightly. His heart raced whenever you moved somewhat. He just wanted to hold you forever. The position you were in covered the cameras you two had on your person.
Sitting down at the bar again, you overheard some older women talking. They mentioned your suspect's name. You and Nick listened, placing your ear pieces closer to the conversation. Then, the ladies started walking to the coat room. They were planning on leaving. You turned to face Nick. You grabbed his wrist and dragged him to the coat room. Maybe they would continue their discussion there. You explained your plan; hide in the coat room and listen in for more information. He slowly walked in the coat room, making sure the worker didn't see him. He pulled you in, your faces inches apart. You blushed and turned around to the opening. The ladies were coming over.
After a while of prying on their dialogue, they still hadn't gotten their coats. You silently celebrated on how long it had been. Then, one saw you. It wasn't very noticeable but the two of you made eye contact for a split second. You pulled back from the opening. Your brain ran through different scenarios to tell so you don't blow your cover. You looked at Nick and bit your lip. He ran a hand through his thick dark hair and whispered, "What? What happened?" You stared at him for what felt like 15 minutes until an idea sparked in your brain.
You cupped his face and kissed him. He pulled away, confused. "What are-?" you interrupted him with another kiss, lasting longer than the first one. You whispered in his ear, "Follow my lead." He nodded gently and grabbed the back of your head. He spun you around and pinned you against the wall. You giggled as the sound of your body loudly slammed. He whispered a sorry and you just kissed him again, your hands getting lost in his hair. His hands traveled all over you, making your stomach flutter. He'd press kisses against your neck, making you smile.
Then, you remembered. "The ear pieces." Your hands reached for Nick's ear and you pulled out the device and threw it to the ground, just in front of the damsels. You pulled yours out and threw it next to Nick's. He made sure they couldn't see it. He smiled as he pulled you closer to him. You laughed, seeing your lipstick all over his face. "Nick, your face." He whispered back,"Shh, it's to seal the deal." He winked and planted a kiss against your lips. He grabbed your leg and lifted it against his thigh. You playfully slapped him, laughing while asking where did he learn that move from. He didn't answer, just held your face so your foreheads touched. You swooned, your knees almost buckling. If it weren't for Nick holding you then, you would've been on the floor.
One of the ladies walked in, not noticing the gadgets on the floor. "Pardon me! I'm so sorry. We thought we heard something in here." She spoke in a hushed voice. Nick turned and grabbed your wrist. "Nah, we were just about done here." You turn his face back to you and try wiping the lipstick off his face. It barely worked. However, it was a nice color on him, really brought out his eyes. His lips turned up in a teethless smile as he watched you wipe his lips. You smiled back for a moment before your eyes darting back to his mouth. The two of you picked the ear pieces off the floor discreetly and shoved them in Nick's suit pocket. You went and looked for your coats yourself while Nick worked his charm on the older women.
You closed the door of the van and got stares from Sonny and Amanda. They smiled and laughed. "We know where he was hiding. The ladies confessed to it when you threw the ear pieces to the floor." You sighed, relief coming over your body. Nick opened the back doors of the van, slamming them shut quickly. He received the car from valet and gave it to an officer who was waiting. "Why did you take off the pieces, anyway?" Carisi leaned back in his seat. You and Nick looked at each other. He smiled and you laughed. "Is that lipstick on your face?" Amanda leaned forward to examine his face. "Whatever, just drive. I wanna get home." Nick groaned and pulled away from Rollin's. Carisi sighed and got in the front, Amanda following not too far behind. Nick looked at you and laughed. You placed your head on his shoulder. His hand sat on your thigh. tracing small circles you could feel through the fabric.
Certainly, when Nick arrived at the station, he'd run to the bathroom. He couldn't handle the same question everyone kept asking. 'Why do you have lipstick on your face?' He went to wipe it off. You sat at your desk, listening to Liv's debrief. Tomorrow, the team was going to arrest the guy. The bathroom door burst open and Nick almost ran out. His suit was slightly wet from the water he spilled all over it. Benson waited for him to settle in. "Thanks to Detectives Y/L/N and Amaro, their amazing work helped us find out this information." Carisi's face twisted into a smirk. "Tell us, how did you do it?" You froze. Nick gave his coworker a dirty look before Fin spoke up. "It's easy to figure out. They got caught so they just made out. They threw their listening devices so they could smooch and get information. "That explains the lipstick!" Rollins' eyes widened as she realized. Nick sat there, stunned. "No, we almost got caught. Big difference." You leaned back in your chair, arms crossed. "Oh, I wanted to see Nick with lipstick on." Fin whined. I laughed. Nick wasn't amused. "Ha ha, everyone. Whatever." He groaned. Olivia turned to us, a demanding look on her face. "You two, go home. Take tomorrow off. Good days work from you two." You nodded and grabbed your stuff, still in the dress. As the two of you left, everyone gawked at our messy kiss. You laughed and once Nick saw you were enjoying the teasing, he eased up.
As anyone does in 3 years, you started dating. Of course Nick was the first person you told. You told him all about the guys you went out with since you saw him all the time; he was like your best friend. There was one guy that lasted briefly. Nick hated it. He hated it when you hung out with him. It stung him every time you mentioned your boyfriend. He went through the pain, just to hang out with you. You were oblivious to Nick's obvious suffering. He hid it quite well. You were just trying to make yourself forget about your feelings for Nick.
"Oh my gosh, he's gonna take me out tonight!" you said to Rollins in the break room. Nick walked in and heard. His face immediately turned into a scowl. "What's your problem?" you spoke to him. "Nothing, just not feeling well." He walked out and you turned back to Rollins. She was laughing lightly. "What's so funny?" She stopped laughing to look at you with this are you kidding me expression. "He's totally jealous. I can see steam escaping his ears on how mad and jealous he is." You scoffed. Nick surely couldn't be more happier that you were happy. That's what he told you. "He does not. He's happy for me." You walked out the break room and made eye contact with your boyfriend. He made a surprise visit. He sat at your desk. In the background, Nick's eyes locked on your boyfriend. There was something in his glare, a flicker of hate. Or maybe envy.
"Listen, I get off in like 15 minutes. Mind waiting until then?" Your boyfriend nodded. He stayed at the desk, distracting you from finishing your paperwork. You giggled every 2 minutes and every time Nick looked up. He loved hearing your laugh. He brought himself down to earth when he realized who was making you laugh. His jaw clenched. Before you left, Nick's eyes locked with yours. He smiled and got up to leave. The flame in your chest flickered. Your boyfriend's words directed your gaze from your partner to him.
'Hey, can we talk? At your place.' your phone lit up in the middle of the night. Your boyfriend texted you. It was one of those nights the two of you slept alone. The text shook the nightstand gently, yet enough to wake you up. You sat up and rubbed your eyes. Barely able to make a coherent sentence, you typed back. 'Sure. when?' A knock came at your door the same second he read the message. It was a coincidence. You got up and put on your slippers which were sitting next to your bed. You grabbed your robe and headed for the door. "Hey!" Nick said. You weren't expecting him at this time. You leaned on the door frame, trying to stay awake. "Nick, what are you doing knocking on my door this late?" He stood up straight. "I have something to tell you. And it couldn't wait." Chills went down your spine.
Your boyfriend was cheating on you. Nick was at the bar with an old friend. He noticed a guy that looked familiar. Could've possibly been his partner's boyfriend. But, he was with another girl. Not him. Nick got closer to them. It definitely was him. And that was definitely not you. Nick went up to confront him. He said it was low to treat a girl like you like this. Your boyfriend shooed his fling along and got up in Nick's face. The two had a big argument and Nick gave in, trying to be the bigger person, and walked out of the bar. Once he got home, he sat up in his bed, letting the guilt eat him. He had enough and got up and drove over. Your boyfriend did almost the same exact thing. Instead of driving over to apologize, unlike Nick, he sent a text. A text that would most likely end up as the end of your relationship.
You sat on the couch, crying while Nick's arm wrapped around you. He was always there to comfort you. He rubbed your arm. It was soothing at most. Your boyfriend blew up your phone when you told him you knew, but you didn't care. You were practically asleep in Nick's arms. He took the blanket off the back of the couch and gently draped it on top of you. He turned on the TV to a soft volume and watched until he fell asleep. His head rested on yours. This was all he wanted; a nice peaceful moment between you two.
The first big fight between you two happened during a difficult case. Cragen was framed for killing a prostitute and was put on leave. You guys worked your asses off to prove your captain's innocence. Afterwards, a trial regarding one of Delia's workers was accusing Brian Cassidy. They pulled Nick to the witness stand, to talk about his undercover time. What they didn't mention that they were bringing up was the relations he had. A girl walked through the courtroom doors. The lawyer asked Nick if he knew who that was. Nick froze. The lawyer repeated his statement. Nick nodded. Once the court was in recess, he rushed out the door. You were confused and went to go find your partner.
A kid. Nick had a kid he didn't know about for 9 years. The mom, Cynthia Mancheno, was a relationship he had when he was undercover for Narcotics. She was suing the NYPD. He sat down at the bar, breakong his clean streak you told him to start. You accompanied him there, not knowing what to say. Nick started to reserve himself after that; not telling you as much as he used too, not cracking jokes. He was different. You tried to ignore it. It bugged you. Until you couldn't take it anymore.
"Are you okay? You haven't been yourself lately." you asked one day. He looked up from his paperwork, his hand against his temple. "Yeah, I'm fine." he muttered through his teeth. The same man who would tell you literally everything suddenly doesn't want to talk about what's bothering him. He got up to go outside. You followed him out the door. "Nick, come on. Something's bugging you. Just tell me." He didn't turn to look at you, just kept facing the elevator doors as if they would magically open up for him and him only. "Just drop it, okay?" You stepped back. He walked out and of course, you followed.
"Nicolas, just tell me!" you begged. The rain ran over your face. He turned around; you never called him by his full name. "I would appreciate it if you stopped annoying me." He didn't mean it. You knew that. It just hurt when it came out of his mouth. "You know, where were you when I told you to stay away from that jerk of a guy you dated?" You scoffed, your mouth staying open. "Y/N I care about you. I knew he was horrible for you, but you never cared about my opinion. Never wanted to hear my feelings." He crossed his arms, his chest puffing out. Was he jealous? "Are you jealous?" His face dropped, the color draining slowly out. "No! Obviously not." You smirked. He rubbed the back of his neck, the same way he does when he's ashamed.
His embarrassment stopped at the touch of your lips on his. You kissed him, under the rain. How cliché. You gasped once the two of you pulled away. "I'm sorry." he smiled at the only words you could form at the moment. "You're soaked, come on." He placed his coat over your shoulders and walked with you back into the precinct. "I just-" but he stopped you. "Yeah, I know."He smiled. "You're not mad?" He shook his head. He smirked and pressed a kiss to the top of your hair. He didn't mind it. Not at all. In fact, he wanted this to happen.
Every time you looked at Nick, something in him flickered. It wasn't big, but it was noticeable. The way he looked at you wasn't the same way he looked at Carisi. It was warm, almost loving. The brushes against each other felt exciting. He never knew why. Just felt something different. But, he was married and when he wasn't married, he was struggling through a divorce and custody. He didn't have time for a relationship.
The moment it hit him, it hit him like a big truck. You were sitting down at your desk. It was his day off. The squad teased you, saying 'your boyfriend's not here.' You brushed them off. But, your stomach fluttered whenever they mentioned you and Nick together. It always crossed your mind, especially at the wrong time. But Nick was married at the time. However, you decided after work, you'd pull up to Nick's house and say hi. How worse could it get?
You knocked on the door. Expecting a tall man to open the door, you were met with a small little girl. It was Zara, his daughter. "Hi!" she said. "Daddy, Y/N's here!" She hugged your legs, barely reaching your waist. Nick opened the door to let you in. He had to practically pry Zara off. You sat at his kitchen table. His daughter ran to her room, grabbing the toys she had. She forced one in your hand and dragged you to the living room. You two were going to play together because her dad wouldn't. It switched over from barbies to playing princess. She snagged your sleeve and sat you down in front of her miniature vanity. She did your makeup, great makeup skills for a 7 year old. Then, you two switched places. You did a soft glam. Some blush here and there. Light eyeshadow. The most you can do with the play makeup you were given. Once you were finished, she looked in the mirror and gasped. It was perfect princess makeup in her eyes. Nick stood in the door way, leaning against it. His arms were gently crossed. "Daddy, look! I'm like a princess!" She smiled as Nick lowered to get a good look at his daughter's face. "Wow. You look so pretty!" She walked out and found the nearest mirror.
In the bathroom, rubbing off the makeup, Nick came in. The door was open yet he stayed in the threshold. "You look,” he paused, subtly looking you up and down. “Great." he laughed. I rolled my eyes. "Shut up. It was your daughter who did it. And she's a great artist." You turned to Nick. His eyes locked on a spot by your lips. "You have something." Without thinking, his hand rose. His thumb gently pressed against your skin, trying to rub off the excess makeup. Your stomach filled with butterflies, yet you didn't make it known. "Thanks." you muttered. He nodded. "I think you would make a great mom." He walked in and closed the lid to the toilet. He settled on the cold porcelain. "What makes you say that?" your hand rested on the sink. His gaze met yours and he softly licked his lips. "Well, seeing you with Zara just makes me view you as a motherly figure. I don't know how to explain it." He rubbed the back of his neck. A smile crept onto your lips. "Nick, you're crazy." The two of you walked out of the bathroom, making sure to not let Zara hear the conversation from the living room: she was a curious kid who liked to butt into people's conversations.
Nick went to do housework. He left you with Zara to play whatever she decided to play in that moment. Moments had passed and Nick realized how quiet the house had become. The worst scenarios ran through his head. He slowly walked down the hallway to see the top of your head peeking from the couch. You faced the tv, which was on at a low volume. He turned the corner of the living room, only to be faced with his daughter cuddled up on the couch with his partner. In that moment, he saw you differently. It was sudden. He stood there for a minute, basking in the sweet rush of feelings. He saw you as a motherly figure for his daughter. He picked Zara up and placed her in her room. A smile crept up on his lips as he pulled the nearest blanket over you. He placed a kiss against your temple and sat down next to you, turning the tv to a irrelevant channel for background noise as he slept next to you.
“What’s up?” you answered your phone. Nick’s voice crackled through the speaker. “Nothing, just want to hear your voice.” You laughed. Clearly he wanted something, you just didn’t know what. “Listen, I was thinking…” he paused. “We could do something, fun!” You scoffed. Nick Amaro was not about fun. “Like what?” The door suddenly echoed, the noise of someone knocking vibrating it. You walked up and opened it to find Nick standing with a basket in his hand. He hung up the call you were still on and gently pushed himself in. “Zara’s with Maria, so I thought we could do a picnic here.” He sat on the couch and opened the basket; pulling out two wine glasses and a dark red bottle. You sat down and giggled at his thought process of this impromptu dinner. Oh Nick, the surpriser. Your surpriser.