Chapter Text
Smoke wisps through the air as Remus exhales, the joint still blazing in his hand. He watches as the smoke dances, head tilting back as he feels the familiar hazy feeling floating slowly through his mind.
He’s sitting on his ratty gray couch in his one bedroom apartment. The couch had been taken from his parents house when he moved out. They insisted, though privately Remus thought it mostly because it was an ugly old couch, and they wanted the excuse to get a new one. The only thing it had going for it was that it was soft, and Remus sinks into it as he takes another drag.
Other than the gray couch, his apartment is decorated in earthly tones, different shades of browns and oranges. The living room was a decent size, especially for it being only a one bedroom apartment. He could hardly afford the apartment by himself, but he preferred living alone to living with someone he didn’t know, so he scraped by.
It didn’t help that he currently only had a part-time job working at the Boston Library. He loved the job, but it wasn’t great for paying the bills, and his disability payments only went so far. Luckily, he was starting another part-time job.
His phone buzzes on the coffee table, breaking him from his high reverie.
“Hi ma,” he says as he picks up the phone.
“Hello Remus!” his mother greets, her voice tinny over the phone. “I’m just checking in. How are you doing, dear?”
Remus’ mother, Hope, is a spirited lady, and idealistic to a fault. She’s also constantly on the move, either working, or coming up with a new hobby. She joined the running club for a time, spent a few weeks making hot chocolate bombs one winter, and is constantly shifting her focus from hobby to hobby, faster than Remus can keep up with.
“I’m fine,” Remus says automatically. ”Good, actually. I’m starting a new part-time job tomorrow.”
“Ah, at the dispensary near you, right? What was it called again?”
Remus sighs. “It’s called Hufflepuff Dispensary.” Remus is actually familiar with the dispensary as a customer; it’s where he gets his medicinal weed, though they also sell recreationally.
Hope laughs. “Right, right! I knew it had a silly name. Are you looking forward to it?”
“I’m not sure yet. At least it’ll help pay the bills.”
“Oh hon,” Hope says, almost a sigh. “If you need help with anything, you can always ask your dad and I.”
But Remus couldn’t ask his parents for help, not when they were barely getting by on their own. His dad was often in between jobs, and as busy as his mom was with her work, her job didn’t pay well. “I know,” he says instead.
After another few minutes of conversation, Remus bids his mother goodbye and hangs up the phone.
He looks around his apartment, eyes catching on the tan cat tree where his cat is lounging in a pouch. Remus stands up, wincing as his hip aches at the movement, and makes his way over to Dante.
Dante is a fat tabby cat, with one ear clipped from when he was a stray. He’d been skittish at first, but quickly warmed up to Remus once he realized Remus was giving him food and attention regularly.
The cat blinks up at him as he approaches, looking reproachful. Remus lifts a hand and gently pets Dante’s head. Dante doesn’t move into the hand, but he also doesn’t move away. Remus takes this as an invitation to keep petting.
As he pets Dante, his mind wanders. Remus loves living by himself. He loves the privacy and the quiet. He can stay in bed till noon and get high all day and there’s no one around to judge him. He can read an entire book in one sitting, without being interrupted.
But at night, when the windows are dark and the quiet overwhelming, Remus wonders what it would be like to have someone to share his apartment with, to share his life with. Not just a roommate, but a partner. Someone who would sit on the couch with Remus while he reads, or maybe someone who would drag Remus out to events, shaking up his quiet life.
In the dark of night, sometimes he looks up at the stars, wondering if fate and ‘one true loves’ are real. Was there someone destined for Remus? Someone who would fit perfectly with him, like a missing puzzle piece of cosmic proportions.
Remus sighs. He has to be realistic, and not lose himself to dreams of impossible things. After all, he doubts his future is written in the stars.
__
The next day, after bidding Dante goodbye, Remus strolls down the street to his first shift at Hufflepuff Dispensary. Remus’ apartment is right off of a highway, and on the same side of the highway the dispensary is a part of a strip mall. It's a short walk, and he doesn't have to cross any streets. After entering the strip mall parking area, he walks past the door for a Pretzel Factory, and then a Dunkin’.
He approaches the dispensary, walking past a window that is painted with the words “Hufflepuff Dispensary” in large blocky letters. Inside, the store is dim, green walls and wooden tables with cannabis paraphernalia throughout, different colored bongs, glass pieces, and vape batteries. The only person in the store is an older woman with grayed hair at the register, tapping on her phone.
The woman at the register looks up from her phone and smiles. “Hiya Remus,” she greets.
“Hi Poppy,” Remus says back. He’s come in often enough that he’s familiar with some of the staff, like Poppy.
“A little birdy told me you’re starting today?”
“Your little birdy would be correct.”
Poppy laughs, then presses a button and the door to the left buzzes. “You can go on in, Pomona should be back there to help you get set up.”
Remus heads to the back, and soon enough he’s whisked away into training for his new position as cashier. He’s taught how to clock in and out on the system, how to use the register to look up items and check people out, and given tasks to complete in his free time when there are no customers.
Eventually, his shift comes to a close and he says his goodbyes to his new coworkers.
After a short walk, he’s home, and he sighs as he sinks into the couch.
Is this what his life looks like now? Working two jobs, plus disability, just to afford coming home to an empty apartment?
Well, mostly empty. Dante comes padding into the room, stomach swaying back and forth as he walks. Remus pats the couch next to him, urging him up. Dante gives him a disdainful look and walks out of the room.
Remus sighs, then gets up and takes his bong out of the cabinet, and gets high enough to forget how alone he feels.
__
Soon enough, Remus gets used to the particulars of his new job. He still stumbles along sometimes, but he can successfully complete a transaction by himself, which he calls a win.
He’s helping a woman in an orange sweater when the door opens, causing the bell above the door to chime. He distantly registers two people entering together, chatting as they come inside. The woman is asking what strain Remus recommends, and Remus is internally panicking as he tries to come up with a professional answer. He knows a bit about the strains, but he’s still learning about a lot of the nuances.
“Well typically sativa strains typically give you more energy and creativity, while indica strains give you more of a relaxing high, so it just depends on what you’re looking for.”
The woman hums and considers this, and Remus glances at the new people who entered. He starts to glance away, before his gaze darts back.
There are two men there, standing in close proximity. One of the men has brown curly hair, and a giant grin on his face as he talks to the other man who -
Goddamn. Remus can feel his jaw drop open as he takes in the appearance of the other man.
He is the most gorgeous man Remus has ever seen. His shoulder length black hair is perfectly tousled around his sharp face, which is sporting a wicked smirk. His eyes are a deep gray and Remus wants to pour his soul inside them. He’s wearing a dark shirt and jeans, looking casually sinful.
The beautiful man catches him staring and his smirk deepens. Remus’ face flushes and he turns to look back at the woman in front of the register. She’s decided on a strain, so Remus walks over to fetch it from the shelf, and finally finishes the transaction.
He glances back to the two men as the woman is putting away her wallet, and he frowns slightly. The curly haired man has his arm around the gorgeous man, and he pulls him in and kisses him on the cheek. “I love you so much,” says the curly haired man as he pulls away.
“Love you too, babe,” the gorgeous man says, smiling.
Babe.
Oh.
Of course. It makes sense that the most gorgeous man Remus has ever seen is already in a relationship.
His heart sinking, Remus tries desperately to fight the blush on his face as the older lady finally leaves, and the two men step up to the register.
“Hi there!” says the curly haired man. “I don’t think I’ve seen you working here before, I’m James, and this is Sirius.”
Remus doesn’t let his gaze move from James as he responds. “Yeah, I just started a few weeks ago. I’m Remus.”
“It’s nice to meet you, Remus,” says Sirius in a honeyed voice, and Remus chances a glance at him. His smile looks predatory, and Remus feels caught in his gaze.
“How can I help you?” Remus asks, trying to maintain composure in front of Sirius’ daunting beauty.
“We’ve got an online order,” James says, arm still slung around Sirius. “Should be under James Potter.”
Sirius elbows James lightly. “No, remember, we did it on my phone? It’s under Sirius Potter.” He turns to Remus with a grand smile, “Sirius, like the star.”
Oh god, not only were they in a relationship, they were married. Remus really stood no chance.
Remus clears his throat and clicks on his register, typing out the letters of the star. “Yep, here it is, Sirius Potter, Gryffindor Gold flower, and two packs of Bertie Bott’s jelly bean edibles, is that right?”
“Yeah,” Sirius says with a grin. “I love all the weird names this store comes up with.”
Remus quirks a grin and quips, “Pretty sure our manager is high as a kite when she comes up with the names of some of these strains.”
Sirius laughs, delighted.
Remus grins back, immediately charmed by Sirius’s good attitude. James is grinning too, and Remus has to fight his smile back to normal. “I’ll grab those for you,” he says, as professionally as he is capable of. He limps over to the jars of flowers, and picks out the Gryffindor Gold strain, before walking over to the edibles.
“Is everything okay?” James asks, concerned. “You look like you’re limping.”
Remus grimaces a bit while his back is turned. He should have brought his cane today. Damn his hip. “Fine,” he calls back. “Nothing out of the ordinary.”
“Oh,” James says, sounding as awkward as Remus feels. “Sorry.”
“S’fine.” Remus mumbles as he pulls out two packs of Bertie Bott’s jelly beans. He scans up the flowers and edibles and tells Sirius and James their total.
Sirius pays for the weed, and the two men leave, after bidding Remus a good afternoon.
Remus heaves a massive sigh and slumps against the counter once the door swings closed. Why, oh why, were all the good ones taken?