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When it was a game, she could see the big picture.
The big picture was something that she was used to. Micromanaging. Being able to see every step ahead of her. the ability to plan. Some loss now and a big pay off later.
And that was much easier when she turned it into a game.
When Hana "D.va" Song first got into her mech, something clicked. She felt protected, not exposed. She felt brave.
People were constantly telling her she was brave. It didn’t really make sense to her. Whats so brave about having your parents die? Omnics killed her parents and what? that automatically made her heart grow three sizes. She was turned from a normal kid into that brave little orphan girl Hana. When people said she was brave, all they meant was that she was pitiful.
So if she couldn't be normal anymore, she would become something else. The kind of different you couldn't pity. The first time she won a Starcraft Tournament she felt a little of that feeling, but her mech, oh boy nothing compared.
She was brave, and this, this was the most important game in the whole world.
Wind was rushing in her ears. An fellow soldier soared past her in a blue mech, shooting wildly. She was new. Hana couldn’t remember her name, but she could vaguely remember talk of it being someone’s first mission today. One of the girl’s guns was destroyed. An big omnic was taking this chance to try and pry the girl out of her mech. The supposedly unbreakable glass on the front of the blue mech was a web of cracks.
Game on.
D.va was off in a flash. In the back of her head she could hear the pings of the on going stream chat, but right now everything was this moment. She rushed forward shooting, and 3…2…1….Eject!
The mech crashed into the other mech, knocking the omnic off and completely breaking the glass on the girls mech.
D.va ran forward and while the omnic was stunned, she grabbed the girl out of the mech. They both had a few minor cuts and scrapes, but nothing too serious. They crouched behind a rock together for a moment. The girl’s eyes went wide when she saw her. D.va grinned.
"It’s always nice to meet a fan." When in doubt always go cocky. The situation didn’t have to feel dangerous if she didn’t let it.
Boom. In the distance D.va could see the remnants of her exploded mech and many a destroyed omnic. Fire littered the battlefield. She had taken out most of them and the rest were retreating. She helped the girl up and together they walked out from the rock.
And that was when the entire battlefield became clear to her.
The omnics were gone yes, but so were several houses and trees. A small area looked as though it had been razed to the ground. One house was completely gone and all the was left was a solitary swing set. She turned off the stream.
The battle itself had to be a game, but the aftermath was different. The big picture was gone, replaced by burning trees and changed lives. The greater good was much harder to accept when staring the "minor losses" directly in the face.
The area smelled like burning rubber. She helped the girl onto the helicopter going back to the base. D.va was staying behind to help with clean up. They dropped off a new mech for her already.
Hana sat on the swings. In 5 minutes she would start up the game again. She would go back to pretending. But not right now.
Bravery did not come natural to her. But she was trying. And in this case losing was not an option. She had seen what loss does.
So she got back in the mech and D.va continued to play along.