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There are a number of rules at Hogwarts, not the ones written down in books but just as important.
Some are simple: if you see Peeves smile, run for your life; be careful with the stairs, they can smell your fear and whatever you do, don’t give Mrs Norris treats, she is a traitor. Things you can understand and would probably save your arse.
One of such rules is: Never mess with the Potter-Black-Princes.
Are they dangerous? Not really.
Powerful? Depends on what you call powerful. Sometimes Harry has problems with his Flipendo.
Awful people then? Absolutely not!
Then you probably are asking yourself… “Who the hell are these Potter-Black-Prince kids?”
Which is valid.
The three people we are talking about are the three children of the Potter-Black-Prince household.
Harry Potter, who we mentioned before, is the eldest, at thirteen years old. A Gryffindor through and through, but much nicer if you ask the Hufflepuffs. He’s a proper sweet bloke - you would probably get along with him just fine. He plays for the Quidditch team like his dad, THE James Potter. Is on top of the class in DADA and can brew a wicked pepper up potion. He is the only one who can make Malfoy stop being a prick for five bloody minutes, just for that the chap deserves a big slice of pumpkin pie.
The second one is Aidan Potter-Prince, who is twelve years old and is Harry’s uncle.
Yeah… It’s… It’s a funny story actually. It seems that Aidan’s Omega Dad shagged Harry’s granddad.
…
In his defence, have you seen Harry’s granddad? Morgana’s sugary tits! No man over fifty has the right to look that good!
Sorry. Let’s go back to Aidan.
He is a Hufflepuff, which is a surprise considering half of his family are either Gryffindors or Slytherins. Cute lad, always getting in trouble with his cousin. If you see him, Harry is probably close. He is very good at potions too, no brainer, his parents are potioneers, but he doesn’t stay in the dungeons all day, usually he is helping professor Spout in the greenhouse or hanging around Hagrid’s hut.
Another rule: If you see him talking with Hagrid don’t ask him about the chinchillas. DON’T DO IT!
And lastly you have, the heiress herself, Lyra Black-Prince. If you didn’t get it by her name, she is Aidan half-sister and Harry’s cousin.
Yes, her Omega dad shagged Lord Black too, move on.
She is a newcomer, this is her first year here so maybe give her a break. Well, you should always give her a break if you don’t want anybody to break your legs. This lass has more honorary older brothers than the whole Weasley clan. Maybe it’s because she looks like an adorable porcelain doll or a weird biological impulse but you cannot be an arse with her.
The other day she convinced Neville Longbottom of helping her with her care of magical creatures’ homework… by going to the forbidden with her. She said the centaurs were “delightful”.
Now, the second question you might be asking is “Why would I bully them in the first place?”
Honestly, mate, I ask that myself. You’ve got to be a special brand of stupid to mess with three nice kids from three of the most influential magical families. Unfortunately, or fortunately if you like gossip and fireworks like me, we will talk about the fireworks in a second, there always is an idiot with a mouth too loud and no sense of self preservation.
You have the sexist kind of stupid, like Ernie McMillan. What? You thought I will start with the Slytherins? No, my dear child, we hate equally here.
What did our dear Ernie do? Well, he decided to “make a comment” about Aidan and Lyra’s Omega dad.
In my house we have a rule, you don’t call another person’s mama a whore.
Let’s just say the other Hufflepuffs didn’t like that. I’ve never seen someone get hexed so fast.
On the good side, now they are under Cedric Diggory’s wing, the lucky bastar—I mean! Lucky guys!
Being honest, Ernie was lucky neither Aidan or Lyra tattled to their parents. Imagine getting on Lord Black’s bad side… yeah, about that…
Exhibit B: Agatha Rosier.
Yeah, the Rosiers aren’t dead. Like a bad penny, I swear.
Anyway, this annoying pest decided to go the pureblood way, with a healthy dose of good old blood supremacy!
I really don’t know what broke the hippogriff back. Maybe is the table switch thingy? Oh, yeah, you can do that and eat with your friends, house tables are more like a suggestion than an obligation.
Where I was? Ah, yeah, Agatha.
Well, the green lassie decided to call our trio dirty *bad word for muggles* and their families blood traitors, muggle lovers. How they tainted the bloody family tree and all that.
Yeah, the lassie never heard of inbreeding.
Let me tell you two things:
- Never get into a fist fight with Lavender Brown
- The fact your family is in the sacred twenty-eight doesn’t saves you of the wrath of Lord Black or Lord Potter.
I’ve never met Lord Black, I barely saw him on the train platform one time, but let me tell you I will never be so stupid to cross him.
For what I could hear from one of the Slytherin seniors that is dating a cousin of the Averys, Lord Black lost his shit so bad even the paintings were whimpering. That man took his pretty well-dressed butt to the Rosier ancestral home and threatened them, he made Lord Rosier shite his pants mate. He said he would take everything from them, their money, their title, their position Wizengamont, even the dog!
Well… maybe not the dog but you get it.
My source said that he didn’t have to raise his voice.
Dear Merlin, I hope one day I can snatch an Alpha like that.
But if you thought that was the worst part, buckle up because here come the fireworks!
You see, not all the Gryffindors are happy with Harry’s friendship with the blond ferret and decided to “politely” express their opinions.
Let’s be honest, Harry is a feisty lad, he isn’t in Gryffindor for nothing. He will fight back and stand up for those he loves but he still is thirteen years old, he can’t fight back against four older blokes.
I’d never had cause to fear Percy Weasley until that day in the common room.
Want to know why we have scorch marks all over the place? Yeah, full on duel, no quarters.
And that wasn’t all, no sir. Suddenly we had, four Slytherins, Malfoy included, three Hufflepuffs, not including Cedric Diggory because he was the one to take Harry to the infirmary, a lost Ravenclaw that saw Harry’s broken glasses and went ham, a bunch of Gryffindors and four angry Weasleys beating the bloody shite out these dunderheads.
And then there were fireworks.
Have you heard of the Red Habanero Dragon Firework? It was EPIC!
Four teachers were necessary to split them apart and many, many points were taken.
Except for the Ravenclaw, Flitwick gave him like one hundred points and refused to give him detention.
About Harry, he was okay in the end, a little bruised and shaken but thankfully no broken bones or contusions. He is quite lucky if you think about it, I mean, he had a bunch of people going to war for him.
And Cedric Diggory carrying him princess style.
Oh, to be carried by Cedric Diggory.
Oh! The blokes? Yeah, they “decided” to leave and go to other schools.
I heard one of their dads that worked in the ministry had to transfer to another department because, you know, people talk. Having your spawn hurt an auror kid is not good for your reputation.
So yeah mate, follow my advice and don’t bully the Potter-Black-Princes lot. You would either get slap, destitute or set on fire.
Now if you don’t mind, I have to get to my dorm before someone decides to explore the third floor or put laxatives in Filch’s food.
Until next time!