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Ilya was excited to have found a littles’ playground not too far from their place in Ottawa. He was even happier not to have to be concerned about being spotted there together by someone that might recognize them.
Shane had woken up with far too much energy, which was often an issue for him in the off season. Despite having his own workout routine, it never seemed to be enough for the man so used to being excessively active, as professional athletes often were.
Whereas Ilya very much enjoyed being able to rest and not have anywhere to be or any demands on his time, his husband struggled quite a bit under the same circumstances.
Finding things to do to get all that pent up energy that so easily turned to frustration, for Shane, out, was very important. Especially when he was having little time and his filters were less engaged and he struggled more with his frustration tolerance, the threshold much lower when he was small.
So, when Shane had woken and shortly thereafter, dropped, and Ilya found him full of energy, small and nearly climbing the walls, he decided a trip to the playground was absolutely the best option.
It was a beautiful day and in the spirit of getting all the energy out of Shane, they walked to the park. It was less than two miles and it was nice to stretch their legs a bit in the sunshine.
Ilya felt like they spent so much time in the bone chilling freezing temperatures, both on the ice and Canada's long winters, that these sunny days were more precious and to be cherished.
He grinned as Shane put his head back, face up toward the sun like a budding flower, as they walked. The little one hummed happily and skipped beside Ilya as he held his hand.
Shane was always to hold papa's hand as on more than one occasion little Shane had stepped out onto the road and into oncoming traffic without looking.
Heart in his throat, Ilya would have to act fast, scooping Shane up and pulling him back onto the safety of the sidewalk.
Ilya didn’t love that so much.
For all that big Shane documented every little thing in his surroundings, catalogued it and was maybe too super aware, baby Shane could be and was often unaware. Ilya’s sweet little space cadet.
Shane was very excited when they approached the park. All the bright colored structures to climb and slide down. Hidey holes and little games.
The way Shane lit up at the sight filled Ilya with enough warmth to last through next winter. He was sure of it.
Shane patiently held Ilya’s hand till they were inside the fenced area of the playground and then, he looked up at him for permission, expression open and pleading.
Ilya chuckled and nodded. “Go on, go play. Papa will be on bench like old man. Very hip, cool old man. Not fossil like Scott Hunter just in case you get mistaken.”
Shane ran off to the colorful jungle gym and wasted no time climbing the rock climbing wall on the side to the crows nest atop. Ilya couldn’t hear him giggle, the afternoon breeze carrying the sound away from his ears, but he could see Shane giggling and his brain filled in the silence with the appropriate well loved memory of a sound that was dear to his heart, and it was music.
Ilya leaned back on the bench and watched Shane bounce his energy out around the bright playground equipment.
It was a good afternoon.
The park was quiet in the middle of a Tuesday afternoon and honestly Ilya preferred it this way. Sure he’d love Shane to be able to play with other littles, but Shane didn’t like that much unless it was another little from the team. And while having other littles here at the moment would have given Shane practice to become more comfortable, he’d be uncomfortable and less likely to be his sweet and wild crazy self getting all his energy out, which is what he needed to be today.
Shane didn’t often get to be carefree and other littles could make him much less so, so Ilya was always so reluctant to push other littles on him. It didn’t make Shane getting comfortable easier, without exposure to get him used to interacting, but most of the time Ilya didn’t have the heart. They’d only just moved in together, Ilya only recently got all the time he wanted and needed with Shane. He wasn’t ready to share that yet. Sue him.
And before they just didn’t get enough time together for either of them to want to share.
Soon, soon they would, but not yet.
Shane was spinning and twisting and flicking knobs on a sensory board in the crows nest and Ilya considered getting something similar for home. Shane really loved those kinds of things when small, and even when big though he’d not admit that. Ilya had gotten him a fidget cube a while back, in the Centaurs’ colors and he always had it in his pocket to fidget with.
Everything felt so… peaceful. Not something Ilya and Shane got to enjoy very often with their high paced lives.
It was really a wonderful afternoon. Shane would play for a bit and run back to Ilya to check in and claim a bit of a snuggle before running off again. Ilya was enjoying it very much and a perk would likely be Shane having a ravenous appetite and willingly having a snack and dinner, food always more difficult when he was small would be made just that much easier.
The little one was running back over again, maybe for another snuggle, most likely ready to go home for a snack and cuddles on the couch.
Ilya saw it happen as if it were in slow motion. Shane was running over, the toe of his shoe hitting the asphalt in just the wrong way and sending him pitching forward, flying to the ground where he managed to catch himself on his hands and knees.
Ilya held his breath, waiting to see how Shane would react, not wanting to react himself and make Shane think he needed to cry if he didn’t.
Shane let out a wail, tears rolling down his cheeks, and there it was. Ilya hopped up off the bench and jogged over to Shane, kneeling down next to him. “Oh malysh,” he said softly stroking his hair and helping him sit so he could check his hands and knees, spotting the problem pretty quickly. A skinned knee. “Papa will fix.”
He looked around a moment, actually not sure how to fix.
“Okay, we go home and papa plays nurse, da?” Ilya asked the baby, who snorted a small wet giggle at papa calling himself a nurse. The little boy nodded his head. “Good, come, climb on my back for horse back ride.”
“It’s piggy back ride, papa.” Shane corrected as he moved to get on and cling around Ilya’s back.
“No, no this is not right. We do not ride backs of pigs. Horse we ride.” Ilya insisted, getting more sniffly giggles as he got to his feet balancing his boy in his back.
Shane wrapped his arms and legs tightly around Ilya’s waist and his arms around his neck tightly as Ilya made their way back towards home.
Home, with his little boy who he could be with whenever he wished to.
He’d fix his skinned knee, grab them a snack and cuddle on the couch with no need to rush.
And wasn’t that just a miracle?