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Everything is backwards now. It feels like real life is the dream.
Sometimes, Erik wondered if it was he who didn't know how to continue, or the pen balanced between his fingers that refused to touch its tip to the paper once more.
Instinctively, he looked up to find Charles, even though he could sense by now where the man was. Their gazes met, briefly, a loving smile exchanged. Today had been spent largely indoors, waiting out the worst of the perpetual rainstorm before venturing down to the beach again. The rumble of thunder and the pitter-patter of rain had long since become secondary noise.
We have endured enough, Charles and I. Haven't we earned redemption by now? It has been weeks, months, and yet nightmares still plague the both of us. I used to be afraid to wake up, but now, no matter how heavy my eyelids are, I am afraid to go to sleep. We wake with the gulls and watch as Sirius descends with the sunrise. It's a curious state of being.
Slowly, steadily, Erik let himself become more aware of his surroundings. He studied his own slanted, balanced handwriting for a long moment, what he'd written still echoing in his ears. Though it was all soon to be forgotten until he looked at the page again, sometime in the future.
He turned his head, gazing out of the window letting in a pale afternoon light to his left. With a slight shock, Erik realized that for once, what fell from the sky wasn't rain. "Charles, look - it's snowing."
Which was how Erik found himself being tugged down the hill to the beach, laughing at how excited Charles was. The snow caught in their hair and on their jackets, soon mixed with a salty sea breeze. Although the sudden shift in weather meant that it grew wintry quickly, Erik couldn't possibly imagine himself wanting to be anywhere else. These were moments he wished with desperation would last forever - yet subconscious told him that this was all far too ephemeral.
And there was Charles, clothing a stark contrast in comparison to the gloomy horizon and blue-gray sea, smiling with windswept hair. His fingers were tangled with Erik's, the snow moving so quickly with the wind that it was little more than a sharp blur.
"It hardly ever snows here," Charles sighed dreamily, gazing fondly at both their surreal surroundings and Erik, who felt beyond blessed to be here in this moment. There was no doubt in his mind that he would cherish this day for a long, long time to come. Perhaps when the nightmares were worse than usual, he could remind himself that moments like these were what he stuck around for. "I love this. I love you."
Erik smiled, and he was still smiling when they arrived back home long after dark. The snow thickened as the sky grew ever darker, and the firelight within their home was warm and welcoming. They settled into bed early that night, each curled around the other as though that would fend off the nightmares they were both bound to have.
Turning onto his side, Erik could see Charles, half his face illuminated by the moonlight, the other half deeply shadowed. Just beyond him, a powdery snow drifted down to the surface.
"Good day?" Charles murmured, gaze mapping out Erik's features.
Erik smiled softly, not for the first time that day and certainly not for the last. "Better now."
It was cold, of course. Colder than usual, with the storm fluttering idly down from the overcast sky. But the blue-green sea still raged and crashed down on the beach, the noise fell just on the safe side of sensory overload, and for once, the ground beneath their feet wasn't slipping away. This was solid; they were home.