Chapter Text
“FUUUUUUUUUUUCKKKKKK!!!!” I screamed as I was hit head-on by a black horse-drawn carriage. The impact sent me sprawling onto the cobblestone street, the sharp chill of the winter air contrasting with the warm glow of distant street lamps that are only now flickering to life. Hooves clattered and wheels creaked as the carriage disappeared into the shadows, leaving only a lingering sense of dread. I didn’t even know those things were still around—but then again, anything can happen in Missouri, right?
For a while, everything was black. At first, I thought I’d passed on, but no—my eyes were closed. When I opened them, I was met with more inky darkness. Tight, cold, and suffocating darkness. The air smelled faintly of damp earth and something metallic, like rust. A low hum vibrated through the space around me, growing louder as I became more aware of my surroundings. I was crammed into a tiny space with absolutely no fucking light anywhere, and that’s when I heard the sound.
“Crap! People are coming,” a raspy, high-pitched voice muttered. It sounded muffled and distant like there was something between us. “Gotta get a uniform while…” A noise like someone straining to pick something up interrupted the voice, and just the smallest sliver of light appeared near my feet before disappearing just as suddenly. “Grrr!! The lid is too heavy!” More sounds of struggling followed, and then suddenly—
“Time for…” the voice said mischievously—at least, I thought it sounded mischievous. There seemed to be a lid between us, after all. “My secret move!”
I felt a slight vibration as the lid started to shift, and then… bright blue fire erupted everywhere in my vision!
“Ah, what the fuck!?” I hissed in a mix of pain and frustration, my voice barely above a whisper as I waved my hand in front of my face. The fire quickly disappeared, leaving a lingering haze of smoke. When my vision cleared, I realized I was still in a coffin—but now I could see the chamber around me. Several other coffins floated in the air, and a massive, ominous-looking mirror hovered at the center of the room. The air felt charged, like static clinging to my skin, and a faint blue glow pulsed from the edges of the mirror, casting eerie shadows on the walls.
Standing right in front of me was a grayish cat-like creature with a pitchfork-shaped tail and bright blue flames blazing from its ears. It was creeping toward my coffin, its fiery ears bobbing as it moved. The metallic tang I’d noticed earlier seemed to come from it.
“Okay, okay. Gotta get…” the cat-thing started, but I couldn’t hold back a cough from the still-lingering smoke. The creature’s ears twitched as its head snapped toward me, a look of shock spreading across its feline face.
“Whaaaaaaaaaaa!?” it yelped, jumping back slightly. “Why are you up!?”
“The fuck you mean, why am I up!?” I shot back, glaring at the… whatever it was. “Your ‘whispering’ was so loud I could hear it through the damn lid! And your little fire trick? Yeah, that definitely would’ve woken me up if I hadn’t been already!”
The cat-thing bristled. “Hey! Who are ya calling loud!?”
“You,” I deadpanned, crossing my arms. “And while we’re at it, you’re Bluebell now. Congrats.”
“Hey! Who are ya calling Bluebell!? I’m the Great Grim!” it snapped back, glaring at me, before huffing. “Well, whatever. Hey, human!”
“What?” I sneered, not in the mood for this nonsense.
“Hurry and gimme those clothes!” Grim demanded, puffing out his chest. “Otherwise… I’ll roast ya!”
I blinked at him, unimpressed. “And attract unneeded attention? Yaaaaaaa… no.” I sighed and rubbed my temples. “Plus…”
Holding up a finger, I began counting off. “One, you’re probably two feet tall while I’m over five foot and, y’know, human, so these will definitely not fit you.”
I held up a second finger. “Two, I’m not getting naked for a cat with no common sense.”
Finally, I held up a third finger. “And three, you’re a cat. You do not wear clothes or even need to wear clothes. So how about no?”
Grim stared at me, mouth agape, before he sputtered, “I… I’m not just a cat! I’m the Great Grim! You’ll regret this, human!”
“Sure, Bluebell. Whatever helps you sleep at night.”
The cat growled and summoned more of that blue fire, and I decided right then and there that I was gonna get the fuck out of this coffin and away from this room. “YA! SEE YA LATER BLUEBELL!” I shouted over my shoulder as I ran out of the room.
It was dark outside, and I seemed to be in a castle of sorts? One of the walls of the hallway I had entered wasn’t even really a wall; it was a bunch of windows without glass, with an archway every once in a while that led to a large courtyard. I dashed through one of these archways into the courtyard. There was a large fountain at the center of the courtyard and an apple tree growing nearby. I didn’t care about that at all really; I just wanted to get away from Grim. I kept running till I ended up in a library of sorts. I mean, it looked like a library, but some of the books were floating, and all the lights on the walls were green and pale, barely illuminating the area.
“Vitra fucking Creatia, the fuck kinda dream am I having for it to look like the first part of the Twisted Wonderland Prologue!?” I whisper as I find myself backed into a corner.
The sounds of paws on hardwood catch my attention, but suddenly there’s more blue fire, which also means Grim found me.
“Did you really think you’d get away from MY nose? Dumb human!” he said proudly as he crept closer. “If you don’t wanna get roasted, better hand over---”
Grim was suddenly very tied up in a rope, and the fire was very much gone, to my relief. “Buwah!? Ow! What’s up with this rope?” he yelped.
“This is no mere rope. It is a lash of love!” a voice called from the darkness.
I groaned. That kinda phrasing meant one thing and one thing only… Dire Crowley, Headmage of Night Raven College and master of procrastination, was the owner of that voice. But this meant I actually WAS in Twisted Wonderland, which is a problem because I am NOT made for constant trauma…
Headmage Crowley stepped into the weak light of one of the nearby lamps, his creepy-ass bird mask and flamboyant bird-feather cape confirming that it was in fact him I was staring at.
He turned to me with a goofy grin. “Ah, found you at last. Are you one of the new students?” he asked me. “You shouldn’t do things like that. Leaving the Gate on your own!”
I flinched a bit. “Sorry… sir…” I picked up Grim and cradled him like a baby.
Crowley sighed. “Not only that, you have yet to tame your familiar, which has broken a number of school rules.”
“Let me go! I’m not----” Grim started, but I shoved my fist in his mouth.
“Right! I apologize for Bluebell. The both of us were rather disoriented after waking up, so we got in a bit of trouble…” I leaned close to Grim’s ear with a forced smile. “You either pretend to be my familiar and go along with the name Bluebell, or Crow Man here is gonna mount your little fuzzy fucking head on his wall! So I’d shut the fuck up and play pretend if I were you, Grim…” I whispered before looking up at Crowley with a sweet smile.
Grim froze, and a weak little meow escaped his mouth. It seems he took my option to pretend instead of death by Headmage.
“Ah, alright!” Crowley said. “But my goodness. It’s unprecedented for a new student to leave the Gate on their own.” He chuckled. “How impatient can you be?” Crowley shook his head and sighed. “The entrance ceremony is already well underway. Let’s head to the Hall of Mirrors, my dear.”
Crowley waited for me to ask some kind of question, probably the ones the MC would have usually asked like “...new student?” or “...Gate?”, but I already knew the answers to those. I had played the game, of course, and knew what would happen.
I giggled. “I probably woke up early because Bluebell’s fire blew off the lid to my Gate…” I held up Grim to show him the fiery fluffball.
Crowley glared at Grim for a few seconds before sighing. “Well, if you’re going to bring it with you, you have to take responsibility and properly take care of it.” He suddenly gasped. “Oh my! Now isn’t the time to be long-winded. The entrance ceremony will soon come to a close!” He started briskly walking to the front door of the library. “Let’s get a move on!”
I adjusted Grim’s position before following him through the door of the library…