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Deanna’s shift on the bridge was almost over. She sat beside Data who was in the captain’s chair, half-listening to him describe a new holodeck program he and Geordi had discovered. He’d been talking about it for over ten minutes now, which Deanna didn’t mind, though she’d ceased to follow the details.
Then suddenly, Deanna was no longer on the bridge. She was kneeling on the soft surface of a bed, her surroundings hazy, the only clear image before her the wide-eyed and softly blushing face of Tasha Yar gazing back at her.
“Deanna,” Tasha murmured, breathless. “Won’t you come closer?”
Deanna found herself reaching out, gently brushing her fingers against Tasha’s cheek. Tasha shivered, and Deanna felt that shiver in her own body. Desire awoke inside her. She couldn’t tell if it was her own desire or Tasha’s or both. She was disoriented and baffled, but she didn’t want to pull away.
She moved closer, wrapping her arms around Tasha. Tasha leaned against her, and Deanna could feel the up and down motion of her chest as she breathed. Deanna cradled her gently, like she instinctively knew Tasha wanted to be held, and she felt comforted and warm. Or perhaps Tasha felt comforted and warm. Deanna didn’t know.
And then Tasha was tilting her head back and Deanna was tilting her head down, and their lips touched.
With a gasp, Deanna was back on the bridge, her fingers clutching at the armrest of her seat.
“Counselor?” Data said, concerned. “Are you all right?”
Deanna’s mind was spinning and her heart was pounding. What had just happened? It had felt almost entirely real. If the surroundings hadn’t had the faded quality of a dream, she might have believed she’d been physically transported somewhere.
But no, it had happened inside her mind. She’d experienced a powerful, all-encompassing mental vision, but it hadn’t come from her own thoughts. She had an uncomfortable suspicion about where it had come from instead.
“I’m all right,” she said unsteadily. “I just… Data, have you experienced any unusual mental phenomena since our away mission this morning?”
Deanna, Data, and Tasha had all beamed down to a planet that gave off unusual readings. They’d found an odd, spiraling structure that had to have been built by some species at some point, but there was no sign of the species on the planet now, and it was otherwise lifeless. They’d determined that the unusual readings originated from the structure, but had discovered little else.
Ever since returning to Enterprise, however, Deanna had been feeling strange. Lights seemed too bright, sounds were too sharp, and the emotions of the people around her seemed unusually heightened, though she’d realized after some confusion that it was her own perception of them that had been altered. And now this waking vision – this overpowering daydream…
“I have not,” Data said. “Have you experienced unusual mental phenomena?”
“I have,” Deanna said. “I dismissed them before, but I had a very strange experience just now.”
“It is my opinion that you should go to sickbay immediately,” Data said. “Your shift will end in three minutes and fourteen seconds regardless.”
A little while later, Deanna left sickbay, thoughtful. Beverly had run dozens of tests, but hadn’t found anything unusual other than slightly heightened activity in certain areas of Deanna’s brain. It was no cause for concern apparently, but could explain the heightened sensory sensitivity.
As for the daydream, Beverly had no explanation. Deanna had described it vaguely with some hesitation, uncomfortably aware that it was almost certainly not her own imaginings she was sharing. Beverly had clearly been incredibly curious, but hadn’t pressed for details, and had instead suggested that Deanna have a chat with the likely source of the daydream.
So here Deanna was, hesitating in front of the door to Tasha’s quarters. The situation was awkward. It was always uncomfortable to tell someone you were pretty sure you’d accidentally wandered into their mental fantasy about you.
It wasn’t as if Deanna didn’t know Tasha was attracted to her. That wasn’t the sort of thing you could realistically hide from an empath. But Tasha clearly didn’t want her to know, so Deanna had politely ignored it, as all Betazoids who wished to get along with non-telepathic species eventually had to learn to do. She couldn’t exactly ignore it anymore.
Deanna rang the door chime.
“Come in,” Tasha called.
Deanna stepped inside the room to find Tasha wearing her workout clothes, in the middle of doing a series of stretches. Her bare arms and legs, the small strip of stomach visible beneath her shirt, and the sweat across her forehead had an immediate and powerful impact on Deanna and she forced herself not to visibly react.
It was a startling response. Of course Tasha was a very attractive woman, and Deanna would certainly have been interested in her if Tasha had expressed any outward interest herself. But Deanna had never felt such overwhelming attraction to her as she did now. She wondered if this was another effect of the strangely intense sensory experiences she’d felt since the away mission.
“Deanna!” Tasha said.
Deanna could feel her surprise with a tinge of embarrassment. Tasha hadn’t expected Deanna to come, and was slightly uncomfortable with her presence. It wasn’t hard to guess why. Only half an hour ago, she’d presumably been imagining the scenario that had so vividly filled Deanna’s thoughts on the bridge, and perhaps hadn’t prepared herself for seeing Deanna in person so soon afterward.
Deanna really wished she didn’t know any of this.
“Is now a good time?” Deanna asked. “It looks like you’re busy.”
“No, no, I’m just finishing my cool down stretching routine,” Tasha said, casually wiping her forehead with a cloth in a way that was unfortunately extremely attractive. “The gym was crowded today, so I went back to my quarters to exercise here instead. Please, have a seat. You just got off bridge duty, didn’t you?”
Deanna and Tasha both sat on Tasha’s couch, Deanna leaving a careful amount of distance between them.
“Yes, I did. Tasha, I have a question for you. Since the away mission this morning, have you found yourself experiencing anything… unusual? Strange mental effects, I mean.”
Tasha’s eyes widened.
“Yes!” she said. “Yes, I’ve experienced several odd sensations. I didn’t think about it until now, but they’ve all happened since the away mission. Voices sound sharper and louder than they usually do. I actually heard Ensign Casey through the wall speaking in the quarters next to mine. I was trying to convince myself it might be a trick of the comm system. Since you’re asking me, I’m guessing you’ve been experiencing unusual sensations too.”
Tasha clearly had no idea about the daydream Deanna had witnessed. Deanna was just going to have to get this over with.
“I have,” she said, “Sounds are louder for me, as you said, and lights are brighter. I just came from sickbay. Beverly told me everything seems fine and the effects should fade in a few days, though you should probably go to sickbay to get checked out too just to be on the safe side. But that’s not the main reason I came to see you. Whatever is causing our senses to increase in intensity seems to have had a similar impact on my empathic sense as well.”
“I see,” Tasha said with a frown.
“Approximately half an hour ago, when I was on the bridge,” Deanna said, “I found myself suddenly mentally transported somewhere else. I was on a bed, kneeling across from another person, and the sensations felt real and completely overpowering.”
“You were on a bed…” Tasha said slowly, “with another person.”
She inadvertently glanced to the side, to where her own bed sat in the corner. Was that where she’d been when she’d imagined the daydream that had swept Deanna up?
“Yes,” Deanna said. “And I’m afraid the other person was you.”
There was a long silence. Deanna felt Tasha’s slowly dawning embarrassment. And then, to Deanna’s surprise, Tasha felt an accompanying wave of guilt.
“I’m so sorry,” Tasha said, her hand coming up to cover her mouth. “Oh, Deanna, I had no idea you’d be able to see something like that. You did… see what I saw?”
“I believe I did,” Deanna said. “I can’t normally witness thoughts with that level of complexity. In fact, not even full Betazoids commonly experience such intimate mental connections inadvertently.”
Deanna regretted using the word intimate, but it was too late to take it back.
“You think it was something about that planet that made our senses increase in intensity?” Tasha said, still filled with embarrassment and guilt. “I’m so sorry, I never would have… imagined what I did if I’d had any idea you’d be forced to…”
Finally, Deanna understood the source of Tasha’s guilt. She saw her mind inadvertently pulling Deanna into her daydream as a violation of Deanna. Deanna herself had thought of it from the opposite perspective. Her intrusion on Tasha’s daydream, accidental though it was, had seemed the violation.
“Please, Tasha,” she said. “There’s no reason to feel guilty. You haven’t done anything to hurt me. Neither of us intended for this to happen.”
Tasha was looking down, unable to meet Deanna’s gaze. Deanna could tell her words hadn’t entirely assuaged her guilt.
“I don’t know what to say,” Tasha finally said. “I never meant for you to… well, you must have already known I was attracted to you.”
“Well, yes,” Deanna admitted. “But I understand that you’d prefer whatever attraction you feel toward me to not affect our relationship, and I respect that.”
Tasha finally met her gaze, startled.
“You think I don’t want my attraction toward you to affect our relationship?” she said.
Deanna didn’t know where Tasha’s confusion was coming from.
“You were clearly attempting to hide it,” Deanna said. “I promise there’s no need for either of us to let our attraction change anything.”
“You’re saying,” Tasha said slowly, “that you’re also attracted to me.”
Perhaps it would have been better to leave that part out. Well, there was no point lying, and Deanna didn’t like to regardless.
“Yes,” she said. “I am attracted to you. I’m very sorry if it makes you uncomfortable to know that, but-”
“Deanna!” Tasha interrupted, her voice rising a little in pitch.
Deanna fell quiet.
“Deanna,” Tasha said again, softer this time but still filled with incredulity, “you’re telling me that this whole time you’ve been attracted to me, and you knew I was attracted to you, and you said nothing?”
Apparently, Deanna had badly misjudged the situation. It did happen occasionally, even to people with empathic abilities.
“Yes,” she said. “I thought you wanted me to say nothing. I thought that was why you weren’t acknowledging our mutual attraction.”
“I wasn’t acknowledging our mutual attraction because I didn’t know it was mutual!” Tasha said, exasperated. “I thought you of all people would make it clear if you were interested in me.”
“Ah,” Deanna said.
Really, this was a very positive development. Deanna hadn’t let herself consider how much she really did desire a relationship with Tasha out of respect for what she’d thought Tasha’s wishes were. But now…
Best to double check and make sure she still wasn’t misunderstanding.
“Just to confirm,” Deanna said, “you’re saying that you would like to act on our mutual attraction.”
“That’s exactly what I’m saying. And you’re saying you want the same thing?”
“I do.”
“This really didn’t have to be so complicated,” Tasha said.
“It really didn’t,” Deanna agreed.
And she leaned forward, pulled Tasha to her, and kissed her.