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I don’t think this is gonna work. My therapist says I should keep a diary or journal to write down what I can’t voice; get my feelings out of my head and onto ‘paper’ whenever I feel like it, or feel able to do it. He says it’s important for me to get ‘it’ out of my system one way or another, and if I won’t speak to him, then I need to write it down. He says it will make me feel better. He’s the expert, so I guess he knows what he’s talking about, but I don’t know where to start. Dad has always told me to set an example to my younger brothers, to be brave, to hold everything in, but the therapist says I need to let it all out because keeping it in will be bad for me, so I guess I’m gonna give it a go, just to shut him up.
I feel dead, lifeless; I’m stuck in the hospital, I wanna see my mom, but my dad says I can’t. He won’t tell me why. He won’t let me see Grandpa either and Grandma’s not around. Dad is acting all weird. No one will tell me anything and it’s eating at me. I must have done something wrong, or bad, or maybe both and I guess this is my punishment.
I look down at myself. I’ve got a broken leg, arm, my chest hurts and I also have concussion and I can’t remember how I got them. What happened to me? I hate not knowing and no one will tell me. Not my parents, nor my grandparents, not even the doctors. They say I need to recover more and that my loss of memory is concerning, but not unexpected because of my head injury, so they have this guy come visit me. He talks to me, but I don’t want to talk to him. Mom told me not to talk to strangers, especially about personal stuff. Dad says it’s all right to talk to Mr Jenkinson—that’s the therapist’s name—but he’s a stranger. They say sometimes speaking to a stranger is better, but I don’t know and I won’t. So that’s why he’s suggested the diary thing
I’m just so confused. I want my family! Please let me see my family! I’ve found out it’s the 16th April. My twelfth birthday was on the 4th, but I don’t remember it. Did I have cake? Did I have presents? A party? I have no memory of anything and it scares me. What did I do that was so terrible that I can’t remember?
I really want my mom, my dad, my brothers… any member of my family. I don’t like being alone! I’m scared, My head hurts! Please someone come! I don’t wanna be alone! I can’t bre…
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