Chapter Text
Lassiter was sitting at his desk. As Juliet approached him from behind, nothing appeared to be amiss. He was upright, for one thing. His arms were crossed and his head was down, as if reading something.
“Hi, Carlton!”
He didn’t respond. It wasn’t until she called his name again, to no avail, that Juliet began to grow worried. She ran up next to him, finally looking him in the face. His eyes were closed, and he was breathing softly. Lassiter was asleep.
Juliet couldn’t believe it. Lassiter was asleep at his desk. Stifling a small laugh, she hurried to the chief’s office.
“Chief Vick!”
“...yes?”
“You’ve got to come see this.”
With a small look of concern, Vick followed Juliet across the bullpen to Lassiter’s desk. Upon seeing the scene before her, an impish grin grew on her face. She spoke suddenly and loudly.
“Detective Lassiter!”
The man jolted awake, eyes flying open and arms shooting out to brace himself against the desk. Disoriented, his eyebrows furrowed. Vick tsked playfully.
“I didn’t think I’d need to remind you of our policy on sleeping in the workplace, detective.”
“Of course not.” Lassiter’s eyes seemed to be having trouble focusing. “It won’t happen again. Don’t know what came over me.” He trailed off, staring into space for a moment before shaking his head and righting himself. He smoothed his dress shirt and turned to face his computer.
Juliet wasn’t laughing anymore. Something seemed off.
“Carlton, are you feeling okay?”
“What? I’m fine.”
Vick tilted her head, taking in his pale complexion.
“No, O’Hara’s right. You don’t look well.”
Now Lassiter was annoyed.
“I said, I’m fine.” He began to stand up. “Now, if the gawking is over, I think we all should get back to-”
Lassiter stopped suddenly as he stumbled, finding his balance. Juliet rushed over, grabbing his arms and sitting him down in his chair. Vick frowned in concern.
“I think you should head home, Detective Lassiter.”
He made a move to protest, but he was interrupted by Shawn Spencer traipsing into the station.
“Heyyy, Chief! Jules! Lassie!” His eyes lit up with each name. “The whole gang is here! Well, minus Gus, who claimed he had a ‘meeting’ with some executive whoever. It’s a shame he couldn’t be here. I miss him so much.” Shawn paused to wipe an imaginary tear from his eye before returning to a flashy smile. “So! What’s going on?”
Juliet glanced back at Lassiter, who gave her a warning scowl. She ignored it.
“Carlton’s not feeling well.”
His protests were once again interrupted, this time by Vick.
“And you know what, Mr. Spencer? You came at the perfect time. Drive the detective home, please.”
Shawn gasped, long and dramatic.
“A road trip? With Lassie?! Count me in!”
“Calm down, Mr. Spencer. Just drive him home.”
“Hey!” Lassiter finally butted in. “I don’t need to go home. I’m fine. Just give me a minute to find my bearings.”
Unconvincingly, he brought a hand to his forehead, wincing in pain.
“Go home, Carlton.” Vick was stern now. “That’s an order.”
He looked helplessly to Juliet. She smiled sadly, indicating she agreed with the chief.
“Don’t worry,” she reassured him. “It’s just paperwork! Nothing I can’t handle on my own. Go home and rest. Shawn will take you.”
Lassiter turned reluctantly to Shawn, who was grinning from ear to ear.
“You heard the ladies. Bedtime for Lassiepants. I hope you know, I’m an excellent cuddler.”
The detective rolled his eyes. Resigned to follow orders, he tentatively stood up, grabbing the desk for stability. Shawn immediately swooped in under Lassiter’s arms to support him, earning a groan from the older man.
“Spencer. Let go of me.”
Shawn ignored him, instead waving goodbyes to Juliet, Vick, and most of the station. Lassiter trudged forward, dragging the psychic with him. If he had to go home, he didn’t want to further elongate the embarrassment of doing so in front of the entire department.
~
Lassiter, very begrudgingly, allowed Shawn to drive his car. They couldn’t very well take Shawn’s bike and, loathe as he was to admit it, Lassiter was in no shape to drive. His headache was pounding now, and he could barely stand upright.
“Just… be careful, Spencer.”
“You act like I’ve never driven a car before.”
“...I’m not sure I’ve ever seen you drive a car.”
“Pshh, please. I’m so good at driving.”
Despite the heavy brain fog that was setting in, Lassiter noticed that Shawn’s driving was, in fact, quite good. He drove confidently and distinctly un-erratically, the latter of which was shocking given his personality. Lassiter silently thanked him for it, even though the gentlest turn still made him groan in dizziness.
“You okay over there, Lassie?” Shawn asked with surprising softness. “We’re almost home.”
“Mm. Just keep driving, Spencer.”
Finally, they arrived at his house. Lassiter didn’t want to know how Shawn knew where he lived, and his head felt so heavy he couldn’t bring himself to care. All he wanted was to go to sleep, work be damned.
Time seemed to skip here and there. At one point Shawn was helping Lassiter up the stairs to the front door, and a moment later they were transported to the dark hallway, headed towards the bedroom. Then, at long last, Lassiter felt his mattress and pillow beneath him. Thank god. To his dismay, being horizontal didn’t completely relieve his dizziness, but it did help.
His vision refocused for a moment, bringing Shawn into view. He’d almost forgotten Shawn was here. Wait a second, he was asking Lassiter something.
“--something to eat? It’s around lunchtime.”
“M’not hungry.”
“Not even a dry piece of rye bread? Some loose sunflower seeds? To be honest, Lass, I don’t really know what you eat. I’ve only ever seen you drink coffee.”
“I’m fine. Go away, Spencer.”
He said it a little more forcefully than he intended to, but Shawn didn’t seem too hurt. He put a hand on Lassiter’s shoulder and gave a quick squeeze before turning to leave the bedroom, closing the door behind him.
Lassiter’s skin felt cold where Shawn’s hand had just been. Shivering from the missing warmth, he pulled the covers up to his chin.
Head slowly spinning, Lassiter closed his eyes to try and find stillness. The stillness didn’t come, but sleep did, his body drifting off. With his last waking thought, Lassiter hoped that a little rest was all he needed; that he’d wake up feeling good as new.