Chapter Text
Shane loves Hayden. Really, he does. He just wishes he wasn’t so overbearing sometimes. He also wishes he would stop trying to set him up with Jackie’s friends. Like he’s doing right now.
“Look, dude, Jackie has this friend named Melissa. She’s known her since high school, and she recently became single. She’s really funny. Like, really funny. I swear, dude, please let me set you up, I can really see you guys hitting it off. She’ll bring you out of your bubble in no time.”
Shane continued putting his hockey equipment away in his locker. He was too tired for this–practice had been grueling. It was times like this he started to regret choosing the locker next to Hayden’s.
Hayden continued to drone on, undeterred, “I’m serious, man. When was the last time you met up with someone that wasn’t a hookup? I worry about you sometimes. And just think, if you and Melissa hit it off, we can even do double dates. It’ll be so fun. Jackie and her bestie, and me and mine. Please consider it, what’s the harm in going on one little date?”
There is no harm, Shane guesses. But even so, the idea of having to spend an undisclosed amount of time with a stranger does not seem like a fun pastime.
Just as he’s about to tell Hayden that, his phone buzzes. He picks it up, seeing a link followed by a singular message.
Lily
3:45YouTube • TV NorgeYlvis - The Fox (What Does The Fox Say?) [Official music …
Hollander have you seen this? 😳🦊⁉️
Warily, Shane clicks on the link, making sure his volume is low. Once the video opens and he sees the thumbnail though, he huffs to stifle his laughter.
Shaking his head, he sets his phone back on top of his locker.
“Who was that? I’ve never seen you smile at your phone like that. Don’t tell me you have some secret girlfriend we don’t know about.”
Shane was about to deny it. Really, he was. But then he started thinking about how saying yes would be the solution to the ‘Hayden being constantly on his ass about setting him up with someone’ problem. And so, before he could overthink it, he found himself saying, “Actually, I do.”
“What?!? Dude, you should’ve just said so instead of letting me go on my whole rant. How long have you been with her? What’s her name? Do I know her? And how come you’re only telling me this now? Does anyone else know? I thought I was your best friend,” Hayden ended his slew of questions with an over exaggerated pout.
“Um, it hasn’t been long. Still fresh. Her name’s Lily. No, you don’t know her. I’m only now telling you because it’s kind of… complicated. And no, no one else knows, so please don’t say anything."
“Complicated. What does that even mean? When can I meet her? Can I at least see a picture of her? Also why don’t you want me to say anything? Is it an affair?”
Okay, now Shane started to regret his lie. He had finished putting everything away so he grabbed his gym bag and slung it over his shoulder. He then grabbed his phone and unlocked it, the screen automatically opening to the text thread between him and Lily, but he saw Hayden looking over his shoulder to try and take a peek at his phone.
“Dude! Privacy, please.”
“All I saw were the emojis dude, swear. Which, what does that combo of emojis even mean? Are you into some kinky shit I don’t know about?”
“No!” Shane exclaimed, his ears turning red. He started walking out, addressing everyone as he said, “Alright, I’m out. Please take it easy. I’ll see you guys next practice.”
He got his usual chorus of goodbyes from everyone, and left. Soon enough, Hayden was on his heels pestering him about his 'girlfriend.' If only Shane could go back in time and stop himself from blurting out his lie. He rarely lies, and this is exactly why–lies eventually caught up to people. Unluckily for Shane, his lie is catching up to him only moments after he said it.
“Can you at least answer the affair question? You didn’t before, and honestly, I’ll lie for you if you ever get caught.”
“No, it’s not an affair. Do you know me?”
“Well considering you kept a girlfriend from me for who knows how long, I wasn’t sure.”
Shane was really starting to feel bad. His little white lie was starting to escalate. He needed to find a way to placate Hayden, and fast.
Obviously, that meant conjuring up more lies.
“Sorry it’s just kind of embarrassing. Look, if I tell you, do you promise not to tell anyone?”
“Of course! That’s not even a question.”
“Okay… look, it's an online relationship. I met her on a website online and that’s why you haven’t met her. I haven’t even met her.”
At that, Hayden seemed stunned. Finally, Shane thought, he’ll stop with the questions and leave the topic alone.
They reached Shane’s car first. Shane turns to Hayden, about to say goodbye when Hayden starts bombarding him with questions again.
“Online?! How do you know she’s even real? What if she’s scamming you? Does she know who you are? I bet she does, I mean you’re the captain of an NHL hockey team, how do you know she isn’t using you. The internet is a dangerous place nowadays.”
“She’s not using me. I’m not naive. And she’s real… I trust her.”
“You trust her?! You haven’t even met her in person! She’s got you right under her thumb, dude. At least show me a picture of her and I’ll decide if she’s real or not.”
Shane was totally and royally fucked. There was no coming back from this. He hates lying! He should’ve just stopped while he was ahead.
“I… can’t.”
“You can’t? Why not? I promise I won’t laugh.”
“It’s not that! I just–I don’t have a picture of her.” He said the last part quietly.
“You don’t have a picture of her? So you don’t even know what this girl looks like and you’re dating her?”
God, why didn’t he just show him a picture of some random girl. This was mortifying. Now his best friend was probably going to think he was so desperate, lonely, and starved of affection that he began a relationship with a stranger online who he didn’t even know the face of.
Hayden took his silence as embarrassment, and decided to free him from his torment.
Patting Shane on the shoulder, he said, “Hey, look it’s okay. I’m just trying to look out for you. In no way am I judging you. But you have to know what this looks like, from an outsider’s point of view.”
Shane nodded, looking anywhere but Hayden’s eyes.
“Look, as long as you’re happy, I’m happy, man. But just please be careful. There’s weirdos out there on the internet.”
“I know what I’m doing. Trust me, you don’t have to worry about me.”
Hayden nodded, looking at him sympathetically, but he finally finally let it go. “Alright man, you know best. But please keep me updated.”
Shane heartily agreed, he probably would’ve agreed to anything in that moment if it got Hayden to stop questioning him.
And so, weeks passed by with Hayden rarely, if at all bringing up Lily. It got to the point where Shane thought Hayden forgot about the conversation. Either that or he was avoiding the topic, which worked for Shane, he’d rather not talk about how he lied about his arch rival being his online girlfriend to his best friend.
Everything was back to normal.
Or, so he thought. Until one day, looking through his emails, he comes across something weird. It’s an email from Nev Schulman ([email protected]), and it reads:
Subject: Catfish the TV Show
Hello Shane Hollander! My name is Nev Schulman from Catfish the TV Show and someone close to you let me know about the situation you have on your hands. I know it’s sometimes hard to accept the possibility of being lied to by someone you thought you could trust, but I’m here to help with that! I’d love for you to be on the show, and to finally get your questions answered. I’m well versed in online relationships, we can get to the bottom of this! Reply back with a date and time you’d be free to video chat, it would be amazing to talk more in depth about your situation before we decide our next course of action.
Can’t wait to hear from you, Nev
What the hell? The more he read, the lower he felt his heart drop. Hayden. This was why he hadn’t brought up Lily anymore, he was working on this behind the scenes. Shane almost couldn’t believe it, but the more he thought about it, actually he could.
He looked up the show Nev talked about, it was some documentary turned TV show revolving around online relationships and finding out whether the person behind the screens was real or a “catfish.”
Immediately, he pulled out his phone and dialed Hayden.
“Hey! How are you man?”
“Hayden, are you actually being serious?”
“What?”
“You tried to get some TV show guys on me?! To find out if I’ve been catfished?! I thought I told you to trust me on this.”
“Oh, I guess they emailed you.”
“Yeah! They did! I thought I told you not to tell anybody!”
“Okay you did, but in my defense, these guys are practically experts in this field, they know what they're doing.”
“That’s besides the point, Hayden! I need you to promise me to leave the situation alone. I have it handled. I’m not gonna reply to this Nev guy, because I’m not being catfished, I know what I’m doing, can you please accept that,” Shane said exasperatedly.
“Okay, jeez.”
“Hayden, I need you to promise me.”
“I promise.”
“Good.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Alright, I forgive you.”
After a beat, Hayden goes, “Have you at least seen what she looks like now?”
“Hayden!” Shane hung up the phone. He really was not in the mood for this. He also hoped and prayed Hayden kept true to his word.
After his best friend hung up on him, Hayden decided his next course of action would be to, of course, email Nev himself again. He’s not sure if it was the urgency in his email or the fact that Shane was a famous athlete, which was bound to boost ratings, but nonetheless, Nev and Max decided to go through with helping Shane find out if his girlfriend was a catfish or not.
Well that, and also the fact that Hayden might have lied on his email, saying Shane never got the casting email and instead asked Hayden to reply on his behalf. What he doesn’t know won’t hurt him. Also, let it be known that Hayden Pike is not one to break a promise. He knows Shane, and he knows that Shane is sometimes too embarrassed to ask for help, so sue him for crossing his fingers when he promised Shane he would leave the situation alone.
At the end of the day, he really was just looking out for Shane. There were so many weirdos and creeps online, so many horrible people who could sink their teeth into Shane and use him for their own good. Shane going on some random website, being who he was, he might as well have been advertising I’m here! Scam me! Use me!
No, Hayden was not going to sit back and watch. That was how he found himself at Shane’s doorstep, with Nev and Max. Hayden knew Shane was probably going to be angry once he saw the sight before him, but once the truth of this Lily girl came out, whether good or bad, Shane would have to forgive him, right?
Shane was taking a long time to answer. They had already knocked twice, with no answer. Hayden’s fist was poised, ready to knock a third time, when Shane finally opened the door. He saw his eyes drift from him, to Nev, and lastly to Max, who was holding up a camera.
Shane seemed frozen in place as his brain tried to make sense of the scene before him. Maybe Hayden should’ve warned him a little before showing up unannounced. But he had to do what he had to do. Surely, Shane would be able to understand where he was coming from. If the shoe was on the other foot, Hayden actually hoped Shane would do the same for him.
After a beat of silence, Nev was eventually the one to break it, “Hey Shane! I’m Nev and this is Max. I believe we spoke briefly through emails when you said you preferred to meet in person rather than the initial video call, it’s nice to meet you!”
Nev had his hand out, waiting for Shane to shake it. After a moment, Shane seemed to fall out of his trance and shook Nev’s hand and Max’s right after.
“Sorry I wasn’t exactly expecting company right now,” Shane said as he opened the door wider, “Uh, come in.” He led them to his living room, extending his hand towards the couches there, “Make yourselves at home.”
Nev and Max sat down, looking at each other, seeming to sense the barest hint of tension in the room. Shane’s smile was pinched as he turned to Hayden and said, “Hayden, I need to talk to you for a sec.” He didn’t wait for Hayden to respond before he started walking away into the hallway, and entered his bedroom.
Hayden walked in a couple seconds later to the sight of Shane pacing back and forth in front of his bed, his hands over his face. He shut the door gently behind him.
“Is it too late to say I’m sorry?”
Shane looked over at the man he considered his best friend, face the epitome of exasperation. He stopped pacing and moved to stand right in front of Hayden.
“I want to know what was running through your head when you set this up. Genuinely. I thought we had the last conversation about this topic the other day. Why did you continue to push it?”
Hayden had seen Shane irritated before. They played hockey for a living, he’s seen this exact same expression on his face countless times. Never had he seen it directed at him though.
“Look, let’s sit down,” Hayden started, going to sit on the edge of Shane’s neatly made bed, “I’m really sorry if you were caught off guard, but I really did this with good intentions. I’m just trying to look out for you, man. What kind of friend would I be if I just sat around letting you get catfished?”
Shane only stared at him. Unfortunately, he really did believe Hayden had his best interests at heart. It was just the absurdity of the situation that still had him on edge.
“Dude, there’s other ways to go about this. Reaching out to some TV show is not the way. Did you really think I would ever agree to this?”
“I mean, right off the bat, no. But I thought if I gave it some time, eventually you would start opening up to the idea.”
“Did you really think bombarding me in my own home on a random Tuesday morning was a good idea?”
“No, but if I stood around waiting for you to come to the decision on your own terms, this person was going to continue leeching off you scot-free. You said it yourself, you don’t even know what she looks like, what she sounds like, yet you’re so defensive over her. These guys can seriously help with that. Have you ever seen the show? It’s good stuff, man. Very informational.”
“If I would’ve ever agreed to this, I would not agree to be on the show! Ever! Did you forget we’re athletes? Can you imagine the bad press we would get if an episode revolving around me being catfished was released?”
Huh, Hayden hadn’t really thought this through.
“Okay, so we don’t do the show. I can still ask Nev to help us. Hell, I’ll even pay him. I really am worried about you. What if Lily isn’t even Lily, and it’s just some guy posing as a girl, biding his time with you?”
Oh, the irony of that last question. Shane rubbed one of his hands through his hair, pulling at the strands. Finally, he sat himself down next to his friend. Was Hayden’s idea absolutely absurd and ridiculous? Yes. However, they wouldn’t be in this mess if Shane just hadn’t lied in the first place. His little white lie has turned into this big monster of a situation. It’s honestly laughable.
“Look, I lied. There is no online girlfriend.”
“What? So Lily isn’t real?”
“Well, she is, just not in the way you think.” Shane couldn’t bring himself to look at Hayden’s eyes throughout his whole admission, instead choosing to stare straight ahead, though he could feel his friend’s eyes burning a hole into the side of his face.
“Okay, and what does that mean? Lily’s real but you’re not in a relationship with her? Is it still an online thing? Because if it is, I’m sure Nev and Max can still help with that. I’m not sure they’d care if you’re in an actual relationship with her or not.”
Finally, Shane turned to look at Hayden. “No, I mean it’s not online at all. She’s real, I’ve seen her in person, she’s just not…” Shane looked away again, debating whether to reveal the hidden truth.
Shane hadn’t even come to terms with his sexuality at this point. Hadn’t taken the time to well and truly think too much on it, scared of what he might find out about himself. Sure, he liked having sex with Ilya, maybe more than he’d like to admit, but did that really mean anything? Sex with girls had been fine. Sex with Ilya was amazing. And in between their covert meetings, they did often text each other. Meaningless texts about their days, or memes they thought one another might like. But it's not like that meant anything, right?
“Not what?” Hayden questioned after Shane had been quiet for a while.
Shane decided to just come out with the truth. Honestly, he didn’t think Hayden was prejudiced, or at least he hoped he wasn’t. “Lily is not a… girl.”
Silence filled the room. Shane couldn’t bring himself to look at Hayden once again. That is until Hayden himself put his arms around his shoulders, bringing him in for a hug.
“Dude, I’m sorry you felt like you had to lie about having an online girlfriend. Really. And I don’t care if Lily is actually a guy. That’s completely fine with me! I mean, not that you needed my approval or anything…” Hayden wasn’t homophobic. This was, however, the first time someone had ever come out to him which–was this Shane’s way of coming out? He really hoped he didn’t end up accidentally saying the wrong thing.
Hayden continued, “So you like guys? When did you find that out? And if Lily is real and you know her, I mean him, in person, who is he? Do I know him?”
Shane pulled away from the hug saying, “I mean, I don’t know. I haven’t really thought about it. Lily isn’t like, my boyfriend or anything, it’s just, you know…”
“Know what?”
Why did Hayden have to be so oblivious?
“It’s like a benefit thing, we’re not really friends,” Shane said softly, the tips of his ears burning red.
Hayden seemed puzzled for a moment before it hit him, “Oh, oh.”
“Yeah, so Lily’s real. There’s no need for this whole catfish debacle. Now can you please explain the situation to the guys out there? And how it was your fault and you’re sorry for wasting their time?”
“Shit, I forgot about that.” They then got up and made their way back to the living room, where Nev and Max were deep in conversation, but paused once they saw them.
“Hey! Is everything okay?” Nev asked.
Shane nudged Hayden with his shoulder. “Yeah, so it seems like there may have been a misunderstanding. Shane isn’t actually being catfished–he explained the situation to me just now. I’m really sorry for wasting your time, but hey, I’ll offer to pay for your flights back, and anything else you guys might need.”
The room went quiet for a bit, everyone seeming to register what Hayden had just said.
“So, I’m taking it Shane had no idea we were coming over.” Nev said matter-of-factly.
Hayden nodded sheepishly.
Shane decided to take the reins now, if only to free Hayden from his embarrassment, “Hayden thought I was being catfished and decided to take matters into his own hands. Again, we’re sorry you had to fly out here, I’m sure you guys are very busy people.”
“It’s alright! We kind of thought it was too good to be true when we first read Hayden’s email anyway. It’s not everyday we get a famous hockey player in our messages asking for help,” Nev answered. “Sorry if this comes off as unprofessional, but even though we’re not doing the show, we’d love to get a picture with you! We’re huge hockey fans.”
Shane heartily agreed. He really did feel bad that they came all this way due to his friend’s misjudgment.
Nev took out his phone and handed it to Hayden, him and Max positioning themselves at Shane’s sides as they smiled for the picture. After taking them, Nev took his phone back from Hayden, and Shane led the group of guys out the door.
“We’re sorry again,” Shane apologized once again before they left.
“Don’t be,” said Max, “Trust me, we’ve flown farther for less. It’s part of the job.”
Nev added on, “We’re just glad you weren’t a victim of actual catfishing. And hey, if either of you ever find yourselves in an actual catfish situation, you know who to call. Hayden has my number.”
“Thanks. It was nice meeting you!” Shane said to him before turning to Hayden who pulled him into his usual bro hug.
“Bye man. I’ll see you. Text me!”
Finally, Shane shut the door and was able to bask in the silence of his apartment once again. He stood there with his back to the door for a moment, just thinking.
Hayden had reacted great, it hadn’t been that scary opening up to him. There was only one more person in the world who knew his secret now, but it was someone he trusted.
Shane definitely learned his lesson about lying. He pulled out his phone, opening the text thread between him and Lily, typing “You would not believe what just happened to me” before pressing send and continuing about his day.