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Jo and Rose had been living together for eight months, yet Jo still hadn’t met Rose’s mother. Jo was insistent upon her ‘no domestics’ policy, and so she would often flee the second she heard Jackie Tyler was coming for a visit. She simply couldn't be dealing with families. Which is why it came as a surprise to her good friend Jack Harkness that she had agreed to this.
When Rose had come home in a right state, makeup running down her red cheeks, eyes red and puffy, two nights ago Jo just had to do something, anything to cheer her up. Her dirtbag of a fiancée had done a runner. Jo had Seen it coming. Honestly most people had, except Rose and her mother.
Jackie had never met Jessie Stone. There had always been an excuse that she'd pull last minute. So, a plan was easily constructed. As Rose sobbed about how humiliating breaking the news to her mother would be, Jo suggested that she would pretend to be Jessie. The plan was simple enough. Jo would pose as Rose’s fiancée, meet Jackie and be so terribly rude (which wouldn't be hard for Jo) that when Rose told Jackie they had parted ways the mother would be almost proud. Then Jo could go back to ignoring Rose’s family and old school friends as much as humanly possible.
Three months later Joe and Rose stood in a bridal store looking at wedding dresses they had no intentions of buying. Jackie was in her element. Jackie had stepped outside for a few minutes to take a call from her friend Mo so Jo leaned in, snapping at Rose.
“Wedding dress shopping? Really? This is getting bloody ridiculous! I was only tryin’ to be nice and now you’re getting me in a wedding dress! Before you know it we’ll be walking up the altar for our sham of a marriage. Hell, why don't we go the whole hog and adopt a couple kids while we’re at it?!” Jo spat.
“Well, how the bloody hell was I supposed to know mum would find you charmin’? Most people don't.”
“Oh cheers, kick a woman while she’s down why don't you.”
“I didn’t mean it like that!”
“Well, Rose Tyler, you need to think of something and quick.”
“Me? This is your mess too. We’re in this together and we’re getting out of it together.”
“But she’s your mother.”
“And it was your idea!”
Rose hadn’t realised she was shouting until she felt a prickling sensation on her back as though she were being watched. She turned slowly and the whole of the bridal store had their eyes on the two women.
“Lovers tiff?” a red-headed woman smirked.
“Oh, give over!” Jo yelled back before storming out of the shop, leaving her ‘soon-to-be-bride’ behind.
Jack sat on Jo and Rose’s sofa, a bottle of beer in hand.
“Don’t say I didn’t warn you,” the american snickered.
“Oi, do you have to be so obnoxious about it?”
Jack simply chuckled heartily. He abruptly stopped when there was a furious banging on the door. Jo turned to stare at the door, eyes wide and questioning. Jackie Tyler called from the other side.
“Jessie Stone, you open this door right now and tell me what you bloody did to my daughter!”
“Oh, you’re havin’ me on. This can not be happening.” Jo moaned, throwing her head back in frustration before walking over to the front door.
By this point Jack was on the floor doubled over with laughter, as nothing brought him such joy as seeing his best friend in a tricky situation.
Jackie flew into the flat, a ball of fury and rage.
“You!” she shrieked pointing a finger accusingly at Jo. “You are goin’ to explain yourself right now. Leavin’ my little girl at the bridal store like that! What the hell is wrong with you two?”
“Jackie I--”
“No, let me talk. Listen here, I don't like you much, not at all really. You’re rude. I didn't like you before I ever met ya, all those excuses, not seein’ me till you'd already gone and taken my daughter away from me! You were already practically family and I didn't know who you were. Do you know what that's like as a mother? It’s terrifying. I just want my daughter happy. I was alright pretendin’, as long as you did your job and kept Rose sweet, but you’ve upset her today, which means you’ve upset me, which means you’re in for one hell of a slap!”
Jo simply laughed.
“Jackie, I’m so glad you said that! You see, me and Rose… we’re not even together.”
“What?”
“I’m her flat mate, Jo. Jessie ran off with another woman and Rose was too embarrassed to say anything, so instead we pretended that I was Jessie. We’ve been trying to figure a way out of this, but since you don't like me I suppose this is probably just as big of a relief for you as it is us, eh?”
Silence fell upon the flat for far too long. Even Jack was tense. Then suddenly it was broken by a loud thwack! as Jackie’s palm connected with the side of Jo’s face.
Rose sat next to Jo on the sofa and pressed a pack of Ice to the brunette’s cheek. Jo hissed out at the sensation.
“Sorry,” Rose mumbled. “I can’t believe she hit you… she properly went for ya!” Rose began giggling until she met Jo’s unamused eyes. “Sorry. Not funny yet, is it?”
“No,” Jo shook her head.
“Ya know,” Rose began, “I quite enjoyed being your fiancée.”
“Really? Why?”
“Well, you were sweet.”
“Sweet?” Jo repeated in a voice of disgust.
“Oh drop the tough girl act. You’re nothin’ but a big softy really. And, you know, for someone who hates domestics you sure are good at them.”
“Maybe it's just a matter of doing domestics with the right person.”
“Yeah?” Rose grinned, her tongue poking out between her teeth.
“Yeah.”
Jo quickly, before she could lose her confidence, leaned in and pressed her lips to Rose’s.
Rose opened her mouth to Jo almost immediately and Jo soon had Rose on her back. The girls had seemingly forgot all about Jack. So, understandably, everyone was a little shocked when he reappeared from the kitchen, a fresh bottle of beer in hand.
“Now that ,” Jack spoke, causing the girls to jump apart, “I was not expecting!”
Three years later Jo and Rose went back to the same bridal shop. This time when they looked at all of the beautiful dresses for Rose (Jo had already decided to wear a suit) it was the real deal.