Chapter Text
Chapter 1 - Escape!
Tylo Daivand - Temple Guard
–
Durendal - Age >1
–
Tylo sighed, stretching his arms in front of him. Night watch at the temple was always a combination of boring and exhausting. Most of the actual Temple Guard who got to do anything were the Sentinels, masked Jedi primarily charged with protecting the younglings.
They were the ones who got to go out, track down the wayward initiates, pull them back to the temple, and report to the various Masters about the escapees.
Temple Guards such as himself? They stood by the entrances, interfaced with the public, and kept the riff-raff away from the vicinity of the temple itself. Night watch was the worst, though. Everybody in this city block was fast asleep, resting for the day tomorrow. Only a handful of times during his tenure had anything interesting happened. Even at that, it was just people curious about the Jedi trying to sneak in for a peek.
Speaking of which, here was another one.
"Jedi Temple is closed for the day." he stated, holding out a hand.
The person in front of him walked slowly, a bundle held in their arms. A hood obscured their head, keeping their face from view.
Tylo kept the hand raised while his other drifted near the stun-blaster on his hip.
"Please don't come any closer. This is a restricted zone." The figure kept walking forward, angled towards him. As they stepped closer, he could see 'they' was actually a 'she', and she had what looked like a child in her arms, obscured by the robe.
"Ma'am?" he asked, hand drifting away from the stun-blaster.
"Please," she began, slowing down. "My child. She's…" She trailed off, unsure how to continue.
"She's unusual?" he offered, stepping closer to the woman. She nodded, a hand stroking the child's cheek. From the light of the temple, he could see that the girl was a cute baby at least. Chubby cheeks like all newly born humans, wispy hair, although it was pretty thick black hair. He remembered when his own child was born, their hair was pretty sparse.
"I was told the Jedi take in children like this. To be trained?" He nodded at her questioning tone. "We do, yes. We'd need one of the Masters to confirm your child is force sensitive. Would you be willing to wait?"
She nodded, still holding the baby. "A moment, please," he offered, stepping back and grabbing his communicator.
"Dispatch. West entrance level 1, calling in. We've got a code 38 here. Requesting an available Master for testing. Over."
The line was silent for a minute, the status light on his handheld changing from an orange 'wait' to green for 'live. "Confirmed, code 38. Master Tarffahr is on his way for testing. Over." He nodded, clicking the comm again. "Received. Is Master Tarffahr the Wookie master? Over."
"Confirmed. Warn the parent. Over," the dispatcher replied, a carefully suppressed grin audible over the line. Tylo laughed to himself, turning back to the woman.
"Jedi Master Tarffahr will be here shortly to test the child. A word of warning, he is a Wookie. Please don't be alarmed at his presence. He's a little on the big side, even for a Wookie." The woman nodded, standing there silently.
It wasn't too long before the west entrance door hissed open, the gentle plodding steps of a Wookie approaching. Tylo turned, seeing the large figure in robes approach.
"Master Tarffahr, this is the mother and child." The Wookie nodded, refraining from speaking. It was probably for the best. A mother giving up her child was a delicate situation, and wookie-tongue wasn't always well-received in delicate moments.
Tarffahr stepped forward, earth-green robes covering her brown-and-grey-striped fur. He could see the woman hesitate, a half-step back as the Jedi approached. Tylo held out a hand, steadying the woman. "He's just going to test the child. Nothing invasive, I promise."
He could see the hesitation, then her resolve as she stepped towards the Jedi.
Tarffahr held out a hand just over the child, eyes closed and humming. A minute passed, and the Wookie stood there. Tylo stood there awkwardly as well, wanting to make small talk if only to break up the silence.
Tylo was a professional, however, and professionals had standards.
A speeder car passed, the large frame glowing blue from repulsor light as it lazily made its way to some unknown destination. Finally, Tarffahr lowered his hand, eyes opening. He glanced at Tylo, a slow nod indicating the result.
"Your child has passed, ma'am. If it is your wish, the Jedi Temple will take your child in. They will be trained as a Jedi." Tarffahr stepped back, letting Tylo talk to the woman. "Understand, however, if you do this, you cannot have contact with your child. It is against the rules of the Jedi for them to have attachments. Knowing this, do you still wish for the child to be raised as a Jedi?"
The woman was silent, staring down at her child. Her hand stroked the child's cheek again.
"I… I cannot raise my child if they are force sensitive. My people would not allow it. I do not…" She was quiet for a period. "I do not want to give up my child, but I must." She stepped towards Tylo, holding the child out towards him.
"Will she be raised well?" He nodded, holding his arms out to accept the child. "Will she… will she want for anything?" Tylo shook his head.
"She will not have riches or extravagance, but she won't know hunger, and she will have a family within the order itself."
He took the child gently from her arms, careful to support her head. By the Force she was young. The child couldn't be more than a standard year old. Thick black hair, chubby cheeks. She was sleeping quietly, which, from what he had heard, was a boon in these situations.
"Does the child have a name, ma'am?" The woman nodded, arms retreating into her cloak. Tylo could see some armour underneath, but it wasn't anything identifiable in the brief moment he saw it in the temple light. It did look familiar though, he just couldn't place it.
"Her name is Durendal." He nodded, committing the name to memory.
"As much as I hate to say it, I will have to ask you to leave, ma'am. Unless you have further business with the temple, Master Tarrfahl and I will need to induct the child into the order as an Initiate."
The woman nodded, turning away from them. She cast one last glance at the child, committing the sight to memory.
Tylo wondered who she was or where she was from. Many cultures in the galaxy tolerated or even rejoiced in a child being born with force sensitivity. Just as many reviled a child with abilities. There were any number of worlds where offering a child up to the temple was the alternative to infanticide.
Behind him, Tarffahl made a noise, indicating they needed to move on. He nodded, turning away from the woman. He clicked his comms again, speaking softly, so as not to wake the child.
"Dispatch. This is West entrance level 1. The child is confirmed to be force sensitive. Returning with Master Tarrfahl for induction."
–
Ellyn Nalle - Katarn Clan Creche Master
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Durendal - Age 6
–
"Why?"
Heads turned towards the child at the edge of the group of younglings, searching for the speaker. The instructor looked at the student in question, seeing it was young Durendal who had interrupted her.
Ellyn Nalle, Master Nalle to the people of the Temple, replied with her own question.
"Why what?"
Durendal frowned, her 6-year-old face scrunched in thought. "Why can't we feel?"
Ellyn paused, formulating a response. By this time in the initiate training, more Jedi philosophy was being introduced, including elements of the Jedi code and how that applied to life. There were always a few who were confused about how to release their emotions into the force. That was the norm. The 'why' was rare.
"Well," she began. "It is not that we do not feel any emotions; it is that we cannot let our emotions rule us. We do that by recognizing what we are feeling, and then releasing it. A Jedi should strive towards balance, and releasing those emotions into the Force keeps us balanced."
Durendal was quiet, face still scrunched.
"Why, though? Why can't I be angry or sad?"
"Anger or sadness are emotions that can become more powerful due to our connection to the Force. A little bit of anger can become a lot of anger, and it becomes harder to calm down." Turning towards the holoboard behind her, Ellyn drew a circle to illustrate her point.
"Anger, or sadness, or any emotion," she began, drawing a frowny face at the top, "can start small." She drew a curving arrow, following the circle.
"But if you sit with the emotion for too long, it gets sticky, like gum." Some of the initiates laughed at the joke. No doubt they were remembering when one of them had gum stuck in their hair.
"As it sticks, the force feeds it a little more and more." She drew a larger frowny face, followed by another arrow. "The more the Force feeds, the more you think about it, and the more you think about it, the more the Force feeds again. This is called a feedback loop." She completed the arrow leading to the first frowny face.
"If you get stuck in this feedback loop, it becomes easier to fall to the dark side. Any emotion can do this, but it is easier with the bad emotions." For emphasis, she continued the line around a second and third time, making sure the students – including Durendal, understood the lesson.
"Master Nalle, why are some emotions bad emotions? If any emotion can get sticky and grow, what makes a bad one bad, or a good one good?" A few of the students frowned, wondering the same thing. More than a few were looking towards Ellyn for an answer.
She had to admit, this was a good question, and unusually introspective for a child. Durendal had always been like that, though. Where most younglings were louder, more playful, and energetic, young Durendal always tended to hang around at the edges, watching and thinking.
Ellyn looked towards the girl now, wondering what was going on behind those silver eyes.
"A good rule of thumb is what an emotion that grows makes you do. If we use anger as an example," she explained, tapping at the frowny face on the holoboard. "It can make you lash out. You might think about hitting somebody you did not mean to, or throwing a toy you like. Anger can become a destructive emotion. Happiness," she continued, now drawing a smiley face on the board. "Can make you unable to be yourself. You become stuck being 'happy'. It is not destructive to others, just yourself. Does that answer your question?"
Durendel frowned, pondering the answer. "So a bad emotion is bad because it hurts others, but a good emotion is bad because it only hurts you?"
Corellian Hells, thought Ellyn.
"Kind of," she slowly answered. "The main point I'm trying to explain is that emotions and the Force can feed off of one another. It is important to acknowledge these emotions and release them in order to remain balanced. A bad emotion is one that can come quickly, while a good one will not."
Durendal nodded slowly, turning the answer over in her head.
Ellyn was fairly certain this would not be the end of the discussion, but at least for now, the girl had something of an answer that satisfied her. Hopefully, the next time she started asking why, it would be in another class.
–
Durendal - Jedi Initiate - Katarn Clan
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Durendal - Age 11
–
The ship around me shook slightly, the sound of landing gear compressing and creaking throughout the ship as we touched down on Ilum. Looking around, I saw the other Initiates all looking nervous.
I didn't blame them. I wasn't feeling too calm myself.
We'd all qualified for The Gathering. All of us learned the Jedi Code, memorizing and internalizing the tenets until we saw them in our sleep. We all had displayed enough control over the Force so as not to be a danger to ourselves or others. We'd done everything right.
But what if we hadn't done it right enough? I know I wasn't the only one thinking that.
Glancing at the Cathar student, Zena, I wonder how she qualified. We all saw and knew she was the weakest in using the Force. (how so? In what way? Is this a general consensus, or does the MC have a personal framing for that?) The Masters thought differently, I guess.
I mentally shrugged and watched as Master Yoda entered the small bay we were all in. His walking stick made its usual tapping sound as he moved towards the door.
"Arrived, we have!" He began with a smile on his wrinkly face as he waved at us.
A few people cheered. Some looked like they might vomit. I was fine, but some people didn't like flying, I guess.
"Begin, the Gathering has. A word of warning, before you begin." Yoda coughed, or at least I think he coughed. He also did something that looked like standing up straight, but I didn't see a difference.
I knew his species lived a long time, but he wasn't that old. Right?
"Into the caves of Ilum you will go. Find your lightsaber crystals. Guide you, the Force will!" He moved towards the door switch, all of us tracking him as he tapped his way to it.
We were all more excited than we were nervous. Every Initiate was; the Gathering was a huge moment in our lives. We finally have the chance to find our lightsaber crystals and move from a regular training saber to a personalized one. This was a big deal.
"Tested, you will be. Relinquish its crystals easily; Ilum does not. Trust in the Force you must, and return to the entrance before nightfall, you must. Freeze up at sundown, the caves will, trapping you overnight." His walking stick smacked the button for the bay door.
Bright light pierced through the top of the loading ramp, ancient hydraulics lowering the platform to the ice below.
I had read about Ilum before we set off. We all had read about it. A frozen world with little animal life; the world where Jedi for almost a thousand years had journeyed to in order to acquire their lightsaber crystals. I clenched my hands, shaking the jitters away. I breathed, trying to release the awe and nervousness I was experiencing, trying to be a good Jedi about it.
I didn't want to fail something so basic on the day I got my crystal.
I stood up, patting down my jacket. We'd all been given winter gear for this trip. Ilum, being an ice world, got very cold, and even colder in the caves. My backpack had some basic survival gear, stuff supplied by the Temple for the trip. I made sure that was on me as well.
More than twice, to be honest. Why did I have to learn from mistakes if I didn't have to make them first, right?
Anyway, when we started the trip, Yoda had talked about an Initiate one year, a year so far back no one even remembered their name, who had forgotten their coat and bag before they had left. Apparently, he still got his crystal, but he never forgot his supplies ever again.
Case in point.
Stepping out into the open air, I scanned the area around us. The other Initiates all had rushed down, chatting with their friends while they tried to look more informed than they were about the Gathering and Ilum.
"Left, they all did, before I could finish." I didn't jump, and definitely didn't let out a squeak, and very definitely didn't make a fool of myself as Yoda spoke to me.
He laughed, not even looking at me as he tapped the ground.
I coughed. "What did you want to say?"
"Test you, the caves will. All in a different way. A journey alone, this is. The final trial, finding your crystal, is," he spoke, sounding more ancient and wise than he probably was.
He had to be wise at least. All of us were rushing outside to enter the caves, and here he was, hanging out in the nice warm ship. That was wisdom right there.
"Go and get your crystal, you should, Initiate Durendal." He looked at me, eyes squinting as he scratched at his chin. I wasn't sure if it was just the wind or if he was scrutinizing me. "Interesting, your lightsaber will be, I think."
I nodded, taking a deep breath of the icy Ilum air. Ahead of me, the rest of the creche were entering the caves ahead, the large stone entrance one of the few elements of the old Temple remaining.
Stepping down and off the ramp, the snow crunched under my boots. Zena was the last of the group to enter, taking a look back at me as I made my way over to the entrance. She didn't wait, instead running in.
It was probably less windy inside the cave. I sped up, much to Yoda's amusement.
As soon as I was in the cave, I realized it was very different from what I had expected. I didn't know what a cave was supposed to look like, but 'stone steps leading down into darkness' was not on my list.
Weren't we all supposed to be about the light?
Where were the other Initiates? I hadn't been that far behind them, but there was no sign of them at all! Huffing, I moved, making my way down the stone steps.
"Just leaving me alone in the cave, huh? Why not! We leave Durendal alone all the time! Oh, because Durendal has weird eyes, or she's too quiet!" The steps at least weren't covered in ice. That was good.
"Nobody ever worries about Durendal! She's smart, she knows what she's doing. She's too smart and independent for people to worry about her." I felt that coil of anger start to unspool. Anger, frustration. I tried and tried to 'release it into the Force', but never had much luck.
Other Initiates in my creche could do that. Except for me, they could all do that, actually. Even Zena! I don't know. A lot of my emotions I could never fully let go of. I tried talking to Master Nalle about it, but she always just told me what to do and kind of how to do it, but never managed to help.
So I just spooled up those emotions instead of releasing them. If I couldn't release them properly, managing them was the next best thing. It worked too! I mean, I still got angry, or upset, or any other emotion I could feel at times, but keeping it spooled up worked.
Except when something happened, and those emotions unspooled. When that happened, I had to respool them to get things back to where they needed to be.
Heh, spool.
The stone stairs terminated in a stone hallway, silver-grey granite somehow shining with enough light to make navigation possible. I reached out with one gloved hand, touching the wall to make sure it was real.
The files we had access to on Ilum, what the younglings had access to, had said the only remaining piece of the temple was the entrance and a few steps, and then it turned into a huge ice cave with dozens and then hundreds of branching paths, some of which were altered by the Force depending on who and how many were there.
I mean, the files could've been incomplete, but there's no way they would miss 'giant hallway at the bottom of a single long staircase from the entrance' incomplete.
I trailed one hand on the granite wall, making sure there was no illusion. That was something I had picked up, reading late into the night and morning. The Force, at least back during the period known as the Old Republic, was capable of many things, such as illusions.
Not mind-tricks that fooled a single person, but an illusion that made people think what wasn't real was real. I had asked Master Nalle about that, wondering who knew how to do that – mostly because I wanted to see it and it sounded super cool!
I still get disappointed when I think back to her telling me Jedi these days don't practice a lot of the skills from back then. During that era, there were a lot of bad Sith fighting the Jedi, so those skills were everywhere. Ever since Lord Hoth defeated them, though, Jedi haven't needed the skills.
Yeh right, they just didn't want us younglings and Initiates causing chaos.
I mean…we would. I would've read twice as much if I could've fooled Master Nalle with an illusion of me sleeping in my bunk, rather than in the Archives.
The stone hallway opened up into a much larger space. It looked kind of like the main concourse area of the Temple back home. Very huge, with lots of tall columns, a few levels, and doors and staircases everywhere.
"Is this the old temple? I thought this was all gone! Oh, Master Yoda is going to be so jealous!"
I grinned, thinking about how I would tell him about this. I might be the first person in thousands of years who got to see this! I pulled the camera out of my bag.
This and the holopad were the only two possessions I had that I could actually call 'mine', and not communal property.
The holopad I had, er, acquired one day when nobody was looking. There had been a new shipment of replacement pads, and Quartermaster Vrek had left the container with them unattended.
I felt bad about it, but I just spooled that feeling up, and I had a personal holopad! Yes it's 'technically' theft, but we all were given holopads anyways, so really this was just removing the middleman.
The camera had been acquired in a similar way. The excuse on that didn't hold up quite as well, though.
But dang if it didn't take nice pictures!
Turning it on, I snapped a bunch of photos of everything, trying to get it all. Massive columns with reliefs carved into them of ancient Jedi. Statues of unknown Jedi in solemn contemplation. A mosaic of the galaxy hanging above everything, with Ilum, or what I guessed was Ilum, right in the center.
Sooo many photos.
"Okay, that's enough photos. I'm not here for pictures, I'm here for my crystal. Now, if I were a crystal, where would I be hiding?" I ignored the few crystals growing from ice formations along the edges of the room as I pointedly put my camera away. Those were faint and dull, and none of them called out to me.
It's not their fault; I just didn't get anything off of them.
I mean… I could meditate on it. See if the Force had anything to say.
I breathed in, letting the cold temple air move through me. Closing my eyes, I breathed again, holding for five seconds and releasing for four.
Feel with the Force. Let its tendrils expand, like a spool of wire. Slowly, slowly in an outward wave. Sensing for a path, a direction, a hint of where to go. The tendrils brushed over the crystals I had noticed and written off.
notreadynotreadynotreadywrongpersontoolonelynotreadyi'mtooweak
The tendrils moved past those, the thoughts vibrating down the line like a message.
A pulse! Not a signal, not a clear path, but something called to me from deeper into the Temple.
I opened my eyes, having turned to look right in the direction of the pulse. A door on the second level, faint lights from deeper in.
I'm getting a crystal! I leapt up the stairs two at a time, face grinning. I wonder what colour it will be? I know at the end of the day I won't have any real choice in my blade colour, but everybody in my creche agreed that the colour mattered, even if Master Nalle or the other Masters repeated that it did not.
I didn't actually know what I wanted myself. Some knew they wanted blue, others green. Zena said she wanted a yellow saber, because she 'thought the temple guardians looked super cool'.
I didn't like her, but she had a point there; yellow lightsabers had a certain coolness to them.
Passing through the door, I looked down the hall. It moved straight for a few meters before going right, the depths hidden from me.
I just smiled, moving on down. Actually…
I reached into my bag, past the camera, and grabbed a piece of chalk. I scratched an arrow into the floor near the door, pointing towards where I had entered the large hall.
Just to be safe.
Deeper into the tunnel, the hallways turned right, then left, then down another staircase. I wondered why they built it like this. If we were going down, why not just use a doorway on the main level?
Oh well. There was what looked like writing on the walls, with arrows pointing left and right, but they had worn away over time, leaving just an indication that they said something.
I suppose the arrows could tell which way something was, but so far, it was just a straight hallway with no doors, so why would you need a sign?
Ignoring it, I moved deeper. The same spool of Force that had 'pinged' was still unfurled in my mind's eye, guiding me with a gentle, rhythmic pulse. The other 'spools' I had wound back up, not needing them.
Heh, spools.
Pulling out my camera again, I snapped a few photos. The hallway was less interesting, but the pictures were always good. The camera snapped as I thumbed the button, spinning on my feet and walking backwards to snap another photo.
I was alone, but I really hope I looked cool doing that spin and camera shot.
The hallway turned again, this time it seemed to be only a 45-degree turn. Mentally, I knew where I was compared to the main room, but beyond a few arrows on the walls, I couldn't see anything that told me where I was.
Oh hey! A door!
Feeling with that thread of the force, I grinned, feeling a kind of return ping along the tendril, leading towards the room. Glancing past it, I saw the hallway just kept going, turning again further down. I stopped at the doorway, looking in.
"That is a lot of boxes."
It was indeed a lot of boxes. Rows and rows and rows of what looked like wooden box drawers on shelving many times taller than I was, and going on for what looked like 30 or more meters.
And then there was a gap, and another stack of shelves. And then another gap, and another row. It kept going until whatever ambient light was keeping things lit stopped, shelves trailing off into the dark.
My force tendril only pinged in a general direction, somewhere down the long hallway of shelves and to the left.
"I thought I was done with hallways. Although it's not really a hallway, I guess." Inner contemplation on the subject of hallways left me as I started moving down the stacks and stacks of shelving. The box drawers looked really small.
I wonder what was in them? Moving to the closest one, I pulled on the little brass handle, the drawer sliding out smoothly.
"Oh. It's a lightsaber crystal. A blue one."
Inside the box, on what looked like a fabric pillow, was a bright blue crystal. Reaching out, I felt it pulse gently, its inner thoughts coming to me.
hellotirednottherightpersonsleepbyesleepbyesleep
I pushed the drawer back in slowly, laughing quietly as the crystal seemed to go to sleep as the drawer closed.
I blinked, looking towards where my crystal was. I tried counting how many drawers were on the shelves, doing the math in my head.
"Twenty drawers a column, eighty columns a shelf…" I stepped into the gap at the intersection, trying to count how many shelves there were. "That is a lot of crystals."
Diagonally, now, I moved closer to where I felt my crystal. Over one shelf, down two, over one, down two. Every turn, I scratched the floor with the chalk, marking the path home.
And then I ran into two people.
The two of them stood there, both very different. They hadn't noticed me yet, so I backed up, trying to look at them without letting them notice me.
The first one was wearing Jedi robes. They looked like the ones she saw at the Temple all the time, soft browns and yellows held shut with a leather belt. A silver saber hilt hung on her hip, arms held behind her with a back so straight I could've used it as a ruler. She looked like one of the Masters back at the temple. I couldn't remember the name right now, but she was one of the meanest Masters. The few times she had taught the creche anything, none of us felt like we had done a good job.
The other person was the complete opposite. I didn't know who the other person could be, but she looked mean. Dark black robes covered her up; the only part of her visible was her face and hair, both of which looked slightly familiar.
Actually, both of them looked familiar. Really familiar.
"Come out, little one. It is rude to spy on one's elders." I jumped, the first person speaking. She sounded like the mean master, too.
I stepped to the middle of the path, my steps slower than they probably could've been. I don't know what it was, but both were off-putting.
"Why have you come here, child?" I jumped, the first lady speaking to me. She hadn't actually looked at me, more concerned with sliding open drawers and scowling at their contents.
"Um… I'm here to find my lightsaber crystal?" The first woman frowned, inspecting another box.
"And you think you're worthy of one?" I frowned too, looking at her. My head tilted, trying to get a better view.
"Master Yoda took me on the Gathering. I wouldn't be here if I wasn't ready?" My answer apparently wasn't right because the first woman huffed.
"Oh, give over, the kid here's doing the right thing! Off to find her lightsaber crystal, then she'll be off to be a padawan! Just step-step-step, following in the same path as the rest of them." The second woman waved her hands at the shelves and drawers around us. "As perfectly unique and special as the next." She scowled, or what I thought was a scowl. It was the same expression Master Nalle made when I asked too many questions.
"She will find her crystal if she is worthy. And if she is worthy, she will be a Jedi. Nothing else matters. She will certainly be better than you."
I raised a hand, wanting to ask a question. Neither of them took notice of me.
"She'll find her crystal because she is strong enough to do so. And if she has any sense, she'll take that crystal and run for the hills. If you're going to be her future, she might as well give up."
The first woman turned around, facing the second woman. I needed better names than that.
Hmm… I'll call them Left and Right. For now.
Left was clenching her fist, even though it was behind her back. Clearly, she was angry, but I don't think it was at me. Right was grinning, happy about something.
"To be a Jedi is the highest calling possible. To be less than the best is a disgrace. If she cannot find her crystal then she is a waste of space. You certainly were." Left's comment now seemed to anger Right. Was this an old argument?
"If she ends up as a Jedi, then that is the real waste. All Jedi are just stupid fools running around the galaxy, preaching morals to those who don't care. Better to get her crystal and run. Carve out her own path, take what she wants, starting with her blade."
Both women looked like they were going to fight. Now might be a good time for me to speak.
"Um, excuse me! Who are you two?"
Both women turned to look at me, and I stopped breathing.
Both had thick black hair. Right's hair was shorter, while Left's hair was very long. Both had the same face, although Right was a little skinnier.
And both had my grey eyes.
"Are you both… me?"
Left scowled, Right grinned.
"That's right, oh mini-me! I'm you! Well, the you if you decided to be something."
"Unfortunately, I am you as well," Left answered, glaring at me and Right. "I am the you if you commit. The path of a Jedi is difficult, and not everybody will make it. Some aspire to greatness, while you can be great."
Right stepped forward, and away from Left. "Oh, buzz off." She kneeled down to me, looking me in the eyes. Now that she was so close, I saw her eyes weren't totally grey. When they caught the light, they looked kind of yellow?
"You take what you want! Money, power, anything in this Galaxy is yours for the taking. Screw the Jedi, they're a bunch of stuffed-up krif-heads who wouldn't know an emotion if it crashed into them." She reached into her robes, pulling out her own lightsaber. Left's was a smooth silver cylinder, with a recessed switch on the side to turn it on. Right's was angry-looking, blade-like decoration on the top and bottom.
"You take your crystal, you turn it into a blade, and then you go out. Kill who you want to kill, take what you want to take, and do whatever you want to do! The Jedi are only useful until they aren't." She stood up, thumbing her lightsaber.
An angry red blade hummed into existence, shortly met by a pale blue blade from Left. Both me's turned to one another, blades raised and ready.
"You're me… from the future?" Both were silent, looking at each other and back to ignoring me.
"Which means this hasn't happened!" I pointed to the left. "Who are you? Are you, me, a Master?"
She scoffed, not letting her eyes off Right me.
"I am not simply a Master, I am the Grandmaster. I have ascended to the highest position in the order. I had to; the rest of them didn't know what they were doing. I had to take control, to keep the Order from falling." I frowned at that.
Yoda was the Grandmaster and would be for a while. He seemed like he was a good Grandmaster, although I knew only Yoda. Why would I kick Yoda out?
I pointed at Right.
"Who are you? You're not Jedi-me, but you've got a weird spikey red lightsaber!"
Right-me laughed, but it didn't sound like a regular laugh. It sounded different. I didn't know what kind of laugh it was, but it didn't sound good.
"I'm you. I'm the real you, the one who stopped caring about others. I'm the you that decided you're the only one that matters. You only need yourself, and I proved it."
I frowned, looking between the two. Both had their blades ready, but neither was attacking.
"You both don't look happy." I pointed at Left.
"I mean, it's cool you became Grandmaster? But you're not making the Order sound very nice. Master Nalle taught us to be nice to people and not to call them bad things. Like idiot, or useless."
I pointed at Right.
"You seem lonely? Like, really lonely. And angry. Both of you do, but you really seem angry." I glanced between the two of them, thinking. I think this is what Yoda was talking about, Ilum testing us. If this was a test… I had to pick which future I had?
Both futures don't look good though. Left and Right both just seemed lonely. Lonely and mad, but at different things.
I don't think I wanted to be them. Either of them.
So I won't be.
I stepped forward, under the blades, ready to fight, ignoring both of them. I slouched a little bit, not wanting to touch the blades with my head, and as much as I wanted to walk confidently through and towards my crystal, I shuffled instead. Both were standing kind of close to one another.
I should make sure to tell the story better if I ever do. 'Shuffled into my future' didn't sound cool.
The light from the blades winked out, Left and Right vanishing behind me. Well, that part was cool at least.
Searching for my crystal now, I stepped towards the shelf ahead of me. Feeling the tendril of Force lead me there, I stared towards the wall of drawers. Holding out a gloved hand, I moved from drawer to drawer, trying to feel something.
herehereherehereiamherepleasetakeme
I paused, my hand over the drawer right in front of me. The tendril was pulsing now, fast and steady through my hand to my heart. On the flight over, Huyang, the lightsaber droid that was older than Yoda had told us the lightsaber was the soul of a Jedi, and that we would know when we had found ours.
Yoda had told us that Ilum would test us, and if we succeeded, we would find our crystal.
Master Nalle had said a lightsaber was an expression of who a Jedi was, and that started with their crystal.
All things I thought of as I grabbed the brass handle and pulled the drawer out slowly. I closed my eyes, pulling my glove off and reaching into the drawer, fingers brushing my crystal.
It felt lonely. It felt angry. It felt happy, it felt sad. It felt and it felt and itfeltandfeltandfeltfeltfeltfelt
My crystal was alive in ways I didn't think it could be. Beautiful, shining like a star in the darkness. It roiled like a storm on some distant planet we had learned about, wrathful and uncaring of those around it.
But it also felt like the gardens in the Temple. Quiet, cool, filled with life and energy.
Above all, my crystal hummed with its own energy, happy that I was here and had found it.
I opened my eyes and beheld a deep red gem, a perfectly faceted bicone the length of my thumb. Rolling it between my fingers, I saw myself reflected in the perfect cuts of the gem, grey eyes, black hair, and pale skin, shocked and looking back at me; a thousand versions of myself in a thousand directions.
It was beautiful.
Too bad the Temple Masters weren't going to be happy I had somehow found a red crystal in Ilum. Even Yoda might have an issue with that.
Darn.
–
Zena - Jedi Initiate - Katarn Clan
–
Age 12
–
"Initiat Zena. Initiate Durendal. You two are up next." Zena looked at the other side of the room, where she could see her spooky opponent.
Zena never liked Durendal. She was a quiet girl who hung around at the fringes, always had. Grey eyes peaking out from beneath thick black hair, watching the rest of the creche. Always bothering the Masters with questions about everything, even after those Masters got annoyed at the questioning. Questions about Jedi history, the code, force techniques, and anything the Masters taught, she questioned it.
Zena didn't know why she always asked questions like that. If the Masters wanted them to know something, they would teach it. Durendal being annoying was just greedy, asking for things that hadn't been provided yet.
She moved towards the sparring ring, Durendal moving shortly after. Grey and red robes with a leather belt swished through the crowd, people parting around her.
Zena fingered her own clothes, a specific blend of soft silk that wouldn't catch on her fur. Brightly coloured in the usual Jedi colours, she straightened as she caught a few prospective Masters looking at her.
Twelve years old, she only had two more years before she would age out. That was two years to get a Padawanship. Two years before she would be sent to the Service Corps, probably an Agriworld, to help grow food for those in need.
Not a bad way to give back to the galaxy, but it was not what she wanted to do with her life.
Stepping into the ring, Zena grabbed her lightsaber, the metal clasp unhooking from her belt with a twist.
Across from her, Durendal held out a hand, lightsaber jumping from her belt to her hand in a show of Force skills.
No, she wasn't jealous of how cool that looked. She also hadn't spent hours and hours trying to replicate the feat.
Shush.
"Both participants will duel, sabers only. No overt force powers, victory will be a ringout, with overall victory best of three. Begin on the starting signal." Master Limpan stood just outside the ring, eyes looking between her and Durendal. Both girls nodded, assuming a stance.
Zena activated her blade, soft yellow light filling her side of the ring. She liked her blade. Ever since she had gotten her crystal on Ilum, she had loved her lightsaber. Smooth, polished durasteel, with a slanted opening at the top. Black pommel with a D-ring clip to hold it to her robes.
Durendal held out her blade, the saber lighting immediately.
Ruby red light filled her side of the ring, a quiet intake of breath from the assembled audience. Durendal's blade had caused something of a quiet uproar at the temple. Masters and Knights all gave her funny looks, mostly when she wasn't looking. Most of the Padawans looked at her oddly, but if Zena had to guess, they were just emulating their superiors.
Initiates made fun of her for it, some calling her a Sith to her face. The Knights put a stop to that when they saw it, but it was about setting standards, not any true disapproval.
Zena didn't care as much. Durendal's red blade was unique, and she knew why many in the Temple didn't like it, and by extension didn't like Durendal, but to Zena it didn't matter. It just meant Durendal was one less competitor for the limited pool of Masters and Knights looking for a Padawan.
Nobody in the Temple was going to give her a chance based on how they treated her. It was sad in a way; the Initiate wasn't given a fair chance since those early days in the creche getting lessons from Master Nalle. Once she had her blade, the possibility of a chance vanished overnight.
Zena assumed her stance, the opening stance of Shii-Cho. She had practiced the first form at every chance she could get, spending time in the salles making sure she had the basics down as much as possible. One of the Knights had mentioned one of the things they looked for in Padawans was a firm understanding of the foundations, rather than skill in the other forms.
Durendal shifted to form two, Makashi. Her feet were at shoulder width, knees slightly bent while her saber was pointed down and at an angle to the floor. Her free arm notably was behind her, forearm tucked against the small of her back.
"Contestants," Master Limpan began, raising a scaled hand. The Selkath Master looked between her and Durendal, eying them. "Begin!"
Durendal moved, bursting forwards with her blade down. Zena was already moving to block her left, expecting a slash up and at an angle. Durendal shifted, juking to the side, blade suddenly pointed at Zena and stabbing towards her. Jumping back, Zena blocked the blow, the plasma-crack of sound ringing.
Moving from the block, Zena brought her grip up and spun the blade around, slashing downwards. Durendal slapped her strike aside, stepping once more to the side, forcing Zena to reorient towards the other girl, attempting to strike but always from a bad position.
The two girls traded blows like this, Durendal moving to the sides, almost lazily smacking Zena's attacks aside, while Zena kept trying to face the other girl, trying to attack but being rebuffed at every attack, and making sloppy attacks when she could.
Suddenly, after Zena must've been forced to turn around four or five times, Durendal changed it up. Zena's tired attack was slapped aside, but this time upwards. Her arms, tired from the bout, jumped up with her blade, surprised at the attack. Durendal kept her blade up, forcing Zena to keep her arms up, even while the other girl dashed forward. Her other arm left its position behind her, index and middle fingers held together. The two fingers touched the bottom of Zena's chin softly, enough for the Cathar to know they were there.
"Bang."
Durendal's quiet word rang through the combat ring, the girl jumping back out of the range of Zena's blade, her breathing no faster or deeper than it was at the beginning of the fight.
Indignant shock ran through Zena, refusing to believe the dirty trick Durendal had pulled.
Master Limpan had a surprised look on his face, which he quickly smoothed over before too many people could get a look at him. "Victory to… Initiate Durendal. While unorthodox, it is not against the rules." He took a breath, considering his words.
"This is a good lesson for all; when fighting with a lightsaber, often the most dangerous weapon is the one you do not see or expect. That said," he continued, looking squarely at Durendal now. "This is a demonstration of your skills with a lightsaber, not your skill with a blaster."
Durendal was unmoved by the rebuke, merely squaring her shoulders and putting her off-arm behind her back again. Huffing, Zena returned to the other side of the ring, arms burning and face red from the humiliation.
Master Limpan raised his hand again, looking between the two, assessing. "Begin!" His arm swung down, starting the next fight.
Zena dashed forwards, not letting Durendal have initiative this time. A strike from above was deflected, her yellow blade swinging back and down to come from below for another attack.
Durendal blocked again, sending Zena's blade out rather than down.
The fight quickly entered a rhythm, once again Zena on the attack, Durendal on the defensive; although based on how she looked, Durendal wasn't worried.
How is she this good?! Zena's furious curiosity went unanswered, attempting to strike at Durendal, rebuffed at every chance.
The crowd watched on as Durendal kept Zena away, grey eyes narrowed as she studied her opponent, looking for her own opening. A few of the Masters could see gaping holes in Zena's form, big enough even Durendal should've seen them, but the girl didn't take advantage of those holes.
Zena brought her saber down, her hands clenched around the hilt, unsure if she had the strength to go on for a third round, let alone land a hit on Durendal at all. She needn't have worried.
Durendal moved this time rather than block. Quickly stepping to the side, her blade came up as Zena's moved down, red saber cutting into Zena's forearms, the training mode stinging nonetheless as her yellow blade fell to the ground, fingers numb.
"Point and match victory to Initiate Durendal. A good match between the two competitors. Form One is an excellent base for all lightsaber combat; it is uniquely susceptible to Form Two. With its reduced foot movements, it is easier to conserve energy during a fight when possible. Initiates, please return to the sidelines. Initiate Jido and Initiate Thalli are up next."
Zena left the circle, giving a tired high-five to Jido. Durendal, behind her, bowed to Master Limpan before leaving herself, returning to her seat on the stands. Her seat was between Boden, a green-skin Twi'lek from their creche, and Cal, a human who epitomized the concept of a solar flare. All three of them were friends since they got back from the trip to Ilum. All three existed on the edges, not quite outcasts, but something close to that.
Ignoring Cal's enthusiastic miming of the fight, Durendal leaned forwards and prepared to watch the next fight.
She huffed, grabbing her water canteen and taking a long sip. Her muscles burned, not as hot as the humiliation at losing to Durendal, but they burned nonetheless. Pushing those thoughts away and into the Force, Zena sat down on a nearby bench, watching the match herself. Both combatants assumed the Shii-Cho stance.
Even if she didn't like Durendal, she copied the girl and watched the match, wondering what she could learn from it.
She wondered what Durendal was learning from it too.
–
Initiate Durendal - Katarn Clan
–
Age - almost 14
–
I sat in the hollow of a tree, sequestered nicely in the corner of the 'Room of a Thousand Fountains.' In reality, there were only a hundred and fifty-four fountains, but 'Room of One Hundred Fifty Four' fountains didn't sound quite as majestic.
I flicked through the pages on my holopad, the totally not sliced data files from the archives flicking by. Mine was particularly nice, definitely not Temple standard. Those were large, bulky devices designed to survive abuse from Initiates of all ages. I used to have one, but this one I had ordered and had delivered to the Temple itself.
Deliveries weren't uncommon, although the Temple frowned on anybody ordering superfluous items. A holopad, even a nice one, raised no eyebrows.
Mine had been something of a custom order from Czerka Industries. Seven slots on the side for expansion cards, a base storage capacity of twelve million DSU's. The display could project three-dimensional images and objects. And a battery that lasted several years, all in an A5 size.
I had soooo much sliced data from the archives on here. Lots of stuff I had access to regularly, even more stuff I really shouldn't have. You'd think them being the Jedi archives, there'd be more security.
Apparently, being known as 'the studious' Initiate meant nobody blinked when I was in the archives for hours.
I flicked through a dry but interesting document on advanced force techniques when the sound of footsteps had me pause. Glancing over my shoulder, I saw Master Limpan and Master Dangon moving into the gardens.
I slouched further into the tree hollow, wrapping the force around me. Master Limpan disliked me ever since the Initiate fights two years ago. My use of my fingers to fake a blaster had really irritated him, and it had just gotten worse.
Don't get me wrong, I am great at lightsaber combat. That just made him more upset.
Master Dangon at least didn't mind me. He enjoyed me when I picked apart most Jedi doctrine. He called it 'being inquisitive' and 'developing a flexible mind'. I think he just liked it because it was a change from rote instruction and memorization.
"Katarn creche will be aging out soon. We've held off on the Service Corps transfer until Boden was of age, but it's evident none of the remaining members will be taken as a Padawan in the next month."
Master Dangon nodded, quiet in contemplation. I didn't dare move, aware that this information concerned me and the creche.
"I have spoken with the other Masters and Knights, those that I can. None are willing or able to take on a Padawan. Unless something happens, I agree. They will be sent to the Service Corps." Master Limpan held his hands together, inside the robes, and looked every bit the sage Master he probably was.
Master Dangon sighed, rubbing his eyes. "Two of them, Boden and Cal, I do not see having an issue with the transfer. Both of them have known for a while that they did not want to be a Padawan. Boden himself came to me and asked if I would recommend him for the Survey Corps. I agreed, of course." Master Limpan nodded.
"Durendal is going to be an issue, though," continued Master Dangon. Master Limpan scoffed, his opinion already evident.
"That girl is always an issue. About as far and away as you can get from a good Initiate as you can. If she's not staring at you like a problem to be solved, she's either elbow deep in the archives or picking apart Jedi doctrine like her life depends on it" Master Dangon frowned, his head tilting.
"I believe you are being too harsh on the Initiate. She is… unorthodox, of course. If somebody was able to take her on, I think she would be a great Jedi. She certainly has the skills. The only thing really holding her back, I suspect, is that blade and demeanor."
"Aye. I never liked that trick she pulled at the Initiate brackets." If Master Limpan wasn't a Master, he probably would've spit. But instead, he grumbled.
I stayed silent and unmoving, the holopad pressed to my chest to hide the light.
I knew it.
"Do you think she'll try to leave before she ages out?" Master Dangon asked. I could've sworn he sounded sad at the fact, but all the Masters kept their outward emotions flat.
Except Master Limpan. But Selkath, in general, are very expressive.
"I believe she will. She's crafty enough to try at the very least. And she is not as subtle as she thinks she is… If she does do it, she'll probably try to leave a week before. " Master Dangon nodded, a sad expression crossing his face." "That's when the mavericks always try."
"We will schedule the transfer three weeks ahead of time, then. It's a bit unkind, but it's the right thing to do, as much as I hate to say it." Master Limpan nodded.
"I, too, wish every Initiate could pursue the path of a Knight, but some are just not suited for it. They'll do better elsewhere. I will also put in a recommendation for Boden. He's always been more interested in starships." He paused, mulling his next sentence over. I strained to listen, not daring to move.
"Durendal, though, she'll go to the Agriworlds. She can't cause any issues there, and they're always screaming for more hands."
Master Dangon nodded. "I'll put in the requests. I'll send you the form for Boden. I'll also schedule the transport for a month from now. We'll use one of the consular ships since we're going early."
The two of them continued their quiet conversation, but I stopped paying attention. Three weeks early, a month from now, that left me a week to formulate and execute an escape plan with the few worldly possessions I wanted to keep.
Mulling it over, I realized there wasn't much I could fit in a small bag. My holopad, obviously. Some spare storage cards packed to the brim with whatever I could get from the archives. I might see if I can crack into some of the restricted item rooms for more data.
If the Temple didn't want to train me, I'd train myself.
Oh, I should take my camera. Technically Temple property, but what they don't know won't hurt them. I should also pack some ration bars, and whatever credits I could scrounge up for a trip off-world.
I don't know where I would go, but first I needed to leave the Temple, without the Sentinels knowing.
Time to enlist some help.
–
The door to Katarn creche wooshed open, revealing the only two occupants left.
"Dury!! Hii! You came back!" Cal jumped up, her long hair bouncing around as she ran to hug me.
Cal was a human like me, although she was also as opposite as you could get. Red-blond hair, green eyes, and a disposition so sunny and bright it's a wonder anybody could look at her without burning their eyes out. Her lightsaber was as green as her eyes and twice as bright, and lightsabers were really, really bright.
She is probably the closest thing I have to a best friend. She certainly considered me her 'bestest friend in the whole creche.' And that was why, just like me, she'd never be a Jedi.
"Hello Cal," I replied, already catching her as she jumped the last five meters, flying in for a hug.
She hadn't taken me down to the ground in a long time, but she kept trying anyway. Probably another reason why she'd never be a Jedi.
Masters didn't like getting tackled. Who knew?
"Hey Durendal, how were the fountains?" I waved at Boden, the Twi'lek lounging on his bunk and reading something on his own holopad. He had a deep blue saber which he loved very deeply.
I put the ever-so-bright Cal down carefully, turning to him. "Illuminating. Both of you are going to the service corps in a week." Boden looked at me, eyes curious. Cal looked at me, somehow brighter, and were those stars in her eyes?!
"Dury! Did you get a Master? Oh Stars! You're going to be a Knight!" She again launched herself at me for another hug. I dodged left this time, letting her scream and flail into a pile of beanbag chairs.
"No, I did not. I think we all knew I wasn't going to. No, I overheard Masters Limpan and Dangon talking about it. Apparently they think I'm going to flee the Temple a week before we all age out."
Boden grinned, sitting upright. His green skin stood out against the brown and cream sheets, amber eyes bright with mischief. He wasn't as loud or sunny as Cal, who could be? But he was his own kind of terror.
"So you're breaking out this week?" He stood up, walking over to Cal and hauling her out of the beanbag pile.
"Obviously. I'm not going to an Agriworld. I want to keep learning about the Force." I glanced towards Cal, who I knew was going to an Agriworld. "No offence Cal. I know you've wanted to go to an Agriworld."
The girl nodded, once again shining like a flare. Corellian Hells she was sunny. Ten minutes on a dead world, and it would be lush again.
"Yehhh, don't get me wrong, being a Knight would be cool! But I love plants too much. I think the Masters would get upset if I kept turning my quarters into a garden. Ohh, is Boden coming with? Boden, we could be plant buddies!"
"No, Boden's going to the Survey Corps. You'll just have to put up with a lifetime of starships and space." Boden now was grinning, a small fistpump as the news.
"Boden! You're going to get to fly starships! Ohhh that's so cool!" Cal flew at Boden now, catching him off guard. He spun, rather than flying into the same pile of beanbags. I grinned softly, doing my best to memorize the antics.
Cal frowned, jumping up. "Wait! Where are you going to go? If you're not piloting starships or helping me grow plants, what are you going to do?!" I paused, thinking it over.
"I don't know. First, I've got to get out of the Temple. Then I've got to get off-world. After that, I guess I'll have to find my way?" Even I sounded unsure. I had no plan yet, despite thinking about it for the last few months.
One idea was to take the info from the archives and hunt down old Jedi temples for knowledge.
To be honest, that was as close as I had to an idea. There was a list I had with some possible locations, but those would be difficult to get to without a ship, or credits to charter one.
I'd been trying to acquire funds to support myself, but the scarcity of stuff in the Temple, combined with my inability to leave by myself, meant it was very hard to come up with credits at all.
The few times I'd managed to get any credits were because I had begged a couple of Padawans who were sneaking out to sell some plant clippings I had collected. I had a measly 52 credits to my name. I wasn't totally sure how far that went.
"I suppose I could stow away on a ship if I had to. Just something to get off-world."
Cal frowned, her eye-searingly bright effect dying down just a little. I could see her thinking, turning the problem over in her own mind. Even though her disposition could be described as 'a sunny airhead', she was quite smart. She routinely scored higher on written exams and tests than even I did.
I absolutely destroyed her and everyone else in the Creche, in lightsaber combat, though. So I thought it was a good trade.
"You could find out what planet you're from, and go from there?"
I looked at her. "I mean… I would if I could. I sliced my file open, though, and there's no world of origin. I was dropped off one night by a woman in a robe. No name, no origin, no nothing."
Boden looked thoughtful, while Cal brightened again.
Seriously, the girl was a solar flare, both in person and the Force.
"Wait! Show me your file!" I shrugged, pulling out the holopad and opening the document. She almost snatched it from my hands, scrolling through the mostly empty intake form.
"West gate level 1 guard Tycho Daivand. He was the one who processed your original intake." She pulled out her own holopad, checking something.
"He's listed on the public roster! Looks like he still works the night shift at the same gate! You could talk to him! He might know something!" I thought about it, fingers raking the side of my head and pulling the hair back.
"Would he listen, though? They're not supposed to talk about that stuff," continued Bodan. He pulled up a trio of chairs for us from the stacks against the wall.
Once we were out, the Katarn Clan was getting a new batch of Initiates. The younglings were all babies, the oldest not even 2 yet. All of them were brought in by Jedi searching the galaxy for force-sensitive children. The chairs were a reminder that we were all that was left of our intake.
I suppose that with the three of us being transferred, they were going to move out of the temporary creche a little sooner than they thought.
"Wait here, I'll go ask him!" Cal didn't wait for my answer, shrugging on her jacket and dashing for the door. A wild swipe of her arm and the door wooshed open for her. Her blazingly bright form vanished down the hallway, heading for West gate level 1.
I went to my bunk, grabbed the small bag, and got things ready for a quick exit.
"I pity Tycho. The torpedo that is Cal is heading right for him." I laughed, pulling out the few items I had.
"Yes. But she'll get the info out of him, I suspect." Boden opened his holopad again.
–
The door wooshed open again, the room metaphorically lighting up with the force of a thousand suns.
I need sunglasses.
"Dury! I got the info! Tycho the guard was very helpful!" I glanced at my watch. That had been less than 20 minutes. "He said he remembered you well! He's only taken in a few younglings over the years, and you were the first!"
I nodded, sliding extra lightsaber power cells into the side pocket of my bag. "What did he say about where I was from?"
"Oh!" she shouted, jumping into the chair. "So he said, while she never explained who she was, and where you were from, he did notice something specific! She was wearing armour!" Cal leaned in close, conspiratorially. Her voice dropped to a loud whisper, one hand hiding the side of her mouth.
"Mandalorian armour!"
I paused, turning to look at Cal. Boden looked away from his holopad, curious. He didn't talk much, content to read his own stuff, but he liked having people around. I was the same, although not to the same extent.
I needed to be alone, but not lonely.
"Are you sure? Are you sure he was sure?" I asked cautiously.
"Yep! He said he didn't recognize it before, but a few months later, he was trying to find a specific kind of food for his wife, who was againpregnant, and he happened to pass by a place called 'Little Keldabe!', although the sign on the front said 'Keldab'ika!' Huge Mandalorian district! Everyone was wearing armour, and it instantly clicked!"
I sat down on my bunk, feeling a wave of something roll over me. Mandalorian. I was Mandalorian?
"Man-dough-lore-e-an," I sounded out, testing the words, feeling how they felt on my tongue. Cal quieted down, letting me process. Boden put down his holopad and looked at me.
"Mando. Mandooooo." I frowned, rolling it around in my head. Mandalorian.
It feels…
"It feels right?" Cal smiled a beautiful smile, hands clenched and hugged to her chest, containing the energy of a supernova.
"Did," I paused, thinking it over more. Did I want to pick this up? Did I want to look into my past?
Did I want to try to find my mother?
I held up a hand, forestalling Cal or Boden and their reactions. Boden leaned back a little away from Cal like she was a torpedo.
No. I didn't want to find my mother. I mean I kind-of did, but also didn't. She had given me up to the Temple, and wished to remain anonymous. I might only be 14, but I could respect that decision.
I hadn't dug into it too much, but as far as I knew, Mandalorian culture wasn't a fan of Jedi, but they didn't hate them. So no, I didn't want to find my mother. If I ever did find her, it would be because the Force brought us together somehow.
"I think… I think I'm going to go there. Keldab'ika. That sounds like the place to start." I paused, feeling it out with the Force. Pulling the idea through a filter made of force tendrils, seeing if anything caught.
It didn't.
I looked up at Boden and Cal. Boden, who was interested but cool about it. Cal, who literally looked like she was about to explode. I stood up, stepping a little to the side.
"I'll go to Keldab'ika. Yeh. I'm not going to find my mother. That path is closed. Probably." I breathed in, quickly thinking. "I don't want to try either. I'm pretty sure she wouldn't want much to do with me. Now," I held out my arms, looking at Cal.
"Alright, now you can-" She plowed into me, a rocket of bright sunny light and emotion. Arms like starship armour wrapped around me, crushing my ribs. I think she was screaming, but it was such a high pitch I could barely hear it.
Boden grimaced, his hearing picking up whatever sound she was making for me.
I was going to miss them.
—
I pulled myself silently through the vents. I wasn't wearing my belt, and my boots had been left just inside the vent hatch behind me. It was dusty, disgustingly dusty, but I was quieter than a youngling making trouble.
According to schematics I had sliced from an archive terminal, plans that I really shouldn't have, if I followed this vent long enough, and took a right turn at the second intersection, I would end up just over something called the 'restricted access vault'.
Restricted access sounded good! It sounded like lots of interesting stuff to copy before I left the Temple. Lots of dusty digital documents collecting digital dust where any council-Master, or an enterprising and sneaky Initiate with nothing to lose, could look at.
The schematics had indicated the room was pretty big. Newer schematics didn't have this room on-file. The only reason I found this one is because I was digging through the older data-vaults, ones that hadn't gotten the newer security patches.
Imagine when I discovered several rooms like this! Although this was the only one accessible via this particular vent with an entrance in a disused hallway. Crawling through it, I wished it was a little less-disused. I would be throwing these robes away when I was done.
Robes got recycled anyway. A little extra dust never hurt anybody. Well… probably. Recently at least. I'd give them a shake before I turned them in.
Second intersection, here we go! Right turn, slightly difficult because I was juuuust small enough for the vent, but not small enough to make it easy.
"And there is the air return for the room!" Ahead, another ten meters, a downward-facing set of grills glowed faintly, light from the room below lighting them up. I moved slower, making sure to be very quiet, while pulling the Force around me tighter, minimizing my presence.
This last 15 meters took a while, but finally I was there. Looking down through the grate, I frowned. That was an old room. That was an old room. Stars that looked old.
I popped the vent open, gently moving it up and onto the other side. Pulling myself over just a little, I managed to get my head through the hole, getting a good look at the interior.
"Seven hells that's a big room. Thank the Force I brought extra data cards." Pulling myself out of the vent, I gently lowered myself onto one of the stacks just below the vent. My feet touched, and I waited, listening for anything.
Nada. Zip. Quiet as a youngling who is hiding from the creche Master.
Glancing around, I held off on whistling in amazement.
Dozens of archive stacks across two levels. Several terminals at different points, with long wooden tables breaking things up and providing space for people to sit at. On the upper level, there was a closed door, but from up here it looked like there was zero security on it.
I hopped down onto the ground, quietly moving to the nearest terminal.
"Alright, let's see here. Definitely an older model, but it's got the same ports on it as every other terminal, so that's good. Looks like…" I tapped at the screen, waking it from sleep mode.
"Isolated network. Nice." I poked the network more, sliding in a data card. "Slicing aaaand.. Done? Wow the security on these old ones is bad. Or old." I glanced around at the age of the place. Definitely old.
I started a transfer from the local network to the card, grabbing as much as I could. Checking the other terminal, I saw it was the same network, same amount of data. I slid in another data card, splitting the transfer rate between the two.
"Alright, while that goes, let's grab the books." Moving to the third terminal on this level, I navigated to another section.
Most didn't quite realize it, but the books on the stacks were just smaller capacity holopads. They were used to store local, specific data in an easier to find format. I didn't quite understand it myself. It seemed a lot easier to just keep the data on a holopad, but perhaps the Temple wasn't willing to buy their Initiates custom Czerka holopads with all the fixings? Who can say?
Sliding in a third card, I sent this one to grab all the data that was marked as 'stored' on the books, not just whatever was in the local network. Theoretically it was the same data, but I'd found discrepancies with the main Archives before. Better be safe than sorry.
"Alright, now that those are all running, let's see what's through door number one." There was only one door, but where's the joke in that? Pushing it open, I had to grab my flashlight, flicking it on.
"Ohhh that's definitely restricted. Turbo restricted. I really shouldn't be in here."
Shelves and shelves filled the room, about as large as one of the levels in the previous room, but only a single floor. Rather than book stacks or data terminals, there were only waist-high shelves running the length of the room.
On top were artifacts. Dozens upon dozens of artifacts, and none of them looked 'Initiate approved.' "That's a holocron. That's a holocron. That's a red holocron. That's a lightsaber that feels angry. None of this looks like I should be looking at it."
I paused.
"This just makes it cooler." I glanced down at my bag hanging from my hip. There was not enough room to hold some of the cool stuff in here. This was my getaway bag too, so I couldn't just come back for more.
"Alright, priorities. Just a couple of items. Let's check the placards." I moved up and down the rows, checking the cards in front of the various things on display. There were indeed a bunch of holocrons, both of the Jedi and the Sith variety. The Jedi ones were predominantly blue and cube shaped, with a few gold and green ones mixed in. The data detailed in them was very detailed, explaining who had made them and what topics they were likely to include.
The Sith ones, all of them red and pyramidal, had much less detail on them, only an approximate age and who made them detailed. A few had some detail on possible contents, but that was about it. Some of the other stuff looked interesting, but I was really pressed for space on this.
"Okay, I've got room for three holocrons, and one or two smaller things. Gotta hurry!" I ran around the room again, grabbing the few items I'd looked at.
A blue Jedi holocron shaped like a cube, whose placard indicated it belonged to an old Master named Thurvik who was, above all, a genius diplomat. That one sat nicely in the bottom of the bag.
An orange dodecahedron with green vertices, that only said 'Astronavigation'. That seemed very useful. It was a skill I wasn't familiar with, but I'd seen it pop up a few times in the archives, and just looking at the word I could take a guess it was learning how to navigate the stars.
Unless I was an enormous idiot. Which I might be?
I picked up the third holocron. Triangular and spikey, it radiated distaste and superiority, a tangible feeling the other two didn't. I held it in front of me, turning it slowly. In most of the lessons it had been mentioned, Sith artifacts were considered bad. Very bad. Just a general 'do not touch, go and get a Master' warning on the front.
This one was merely labelled 'Lightsaber / Force techniques'. No name, no dates, no nothing.
I slipped that one into the bag between the two others. Something about them thankfully cancelled out much of the negativity coming from the third one. That was a handy and unexpected boon.
Racing down the isle, I grabbed the last item of note, a spooky looking scroll of dark green paper that the force practically dragged me to. Stuffing that into my bag, I shrugged, seeing there was a little more room left.
"Nah, I got everything I need. Gotta grab the data cards and get out."
Thankfully the cards were all done, and I was able to leave the restricted vault with nobody the wiser. If anybody asked, I definitely wasn't humming 'spooky bag of loot, i've got a spooky bag of loot' to myself.
Never. I'm a professional.
–
The door to the Katarn creche swooshed open, letting me quietly step through. Boden and Cal were up, both looking at something on a holopad. Boden looked up at my entrance, waving.
"Hey Durendal, you got what you wanted?" I nodded, dropping the bag gently on my bunk.
"Yeh. That was the last holdout in the temple that I've managed to find. There's a few others, but those are actively patrolled." He nodded, gesturing at the holopad.
"We figured out a way to distract the Sentinels." Cal brightened, turning to look at me, huge grin on her face. "We found a great way to distract the whole Temple!" She pointed the pad at me, showing the Consular ship.
"We're going to steal a ship!"
I made a choking sound, looking at the two of them. Steal a ship? What in the hells?!
Cal grinned. "We'll steal it tomorrow night! Nothing crazy, we'll just fly it around the Temple a little. We'll stay on the East-side of the Temple, give you the best chance to get away." She stood up, tossing the holopad to Bodan.
"You're… going to steal a ship. For me?" Boden and Cal nodded, completely serious.
"We considered everything else, but it was either not enough, or it was too violent."
I looked at Boden, who closed his hands together before making a silent 'boom'. I blanched. Seriously Cal, you were going to set off a bomb? How do you know how to make a bomb? Sometimes I was amazed she wasn't going to get taken on as a Padawan.
Other times I realized with stark realization she couldn't be a Jedi. She'd be her own brand of chaos, but she'd never be a Jedi. They could never handle her.
I sat down, feeling a little faint. Cal continued grinning at the plan, and quite possibly at my reaction.
"I mean, what are they going to do? Kick us out? They're already doing that." Boden raised his hand, pulling my attention to him. "We're not stealing it exactly. I'm going to sneak on and program a messy flight path that gets their attention. Cal here is going to be my lookout."
He threw the holopad onto his bunk. "As fun as it would be to steal a Consular ship and be pirates for a day, I think the punishment would be pretty bad. No, we'll rig it to fly on its own."
He glanced at Cal. "She just wishes she could steal it." Cal shrugged, eyes bright.
I nodded, not trusting myself to speak about the plan just yet. Instead, "Okay. When you start the distraction, I'll wait a little bit. You'll need to send me an all-clear when it's safe to go." I pulled out my own map, the schematics of the Temple and surrounding city infrastructure coming to life above the device.
I looked at the two of them, fully prepared for their reaction. "I'm going to jump."
Somehow, impossibly, against all the odds, Cal's burning brightness faded a little. Just enough that it wasn't like staring into the sun.
"You're going to jump?" I nodded, pointing at the side. "On the West side there's a fluid drain. I'll cut it out and make the leap to sub-plate two." The image zoomed out, showing the top continental plate of the planet, and then a point just slightly on the edge of that near the Temple.
"From there I can use a ventilation duct to move further into the plate and away from the Temple." I glanced at the two and the pad on the bunk. "So. With your… little distraction, I think I'll be fine." I breathed, taking it all in.
"Tomorrow night then." Cal sat down beside me on the bunk. "Tomorrow night you'll get out of here." Boden sat down on the other side. "You'll keep in touch, yeh?"
I nodded, my throat suddenly stuck. I was doing this. I was really doing this. I'd been thinking about this for months, but the conversation in the meditation hall had cemented my path. I'd spent the last four days slicing and swiping anything of note to continue my studies when I was gone.
I'd acquired maps and hyperspace coordinates, and even found a few credits here and there.
Theoretically, I was set. I had everything laid out, ready for the distraction. I wasn't counting on a karkin' Consular being used as a distraction, but I'll take what I can get. Now I just need to do it.
Damn.
"Yeh. I'll keep in touch. Let me know when you get where you're going." Cal leaned into me, definitely not crying. Boden bumped my shoulder, his own presence in the Force subdued.
"It'd be cool if we could all stick together," he began. "But I think I'd go a little crazy staying on a planet growing plants." He leaned forwards, looking at Cal. "And Cal, you'd probably go just as crazy if you had to stay on a ship." Cal laughed gently.
"And Durendal?" he paused, looking up. The ceiling of the creche had a pattern on it of stars. Little fiber-optic leads pushed into a fabric covering that kept the room from ever getting fully dark. I knew how it worked, but I still liked it.
"Durendal, you're off to something different. Maybe greater, but definitely different." He was quiet, pondering his words.
"If the Temple won't train Dury, she'll just have to prove them all wrong!" I looked at Cal, nodding slowly.
I threw my arms around the two of them, all three of us definitely not crying or thinking about how in just over a day I'd be gone, and we'd all be off to our new lives.
"Come on guys." I stood up, brushing my pants off. "Let's go to the fountains one last time. I want to meditate with you two." Cal and Boden stood up, the three of us heading out the door for the fountains.
—
I stood in the fluid drain, and I hated it.
Not that I hated this plan, although some parts I was now objecting to. No, I hated standing in the drain itself. The schematics had indicated it was a drain, and it was the best place to leap to the sub-plate.
They hadn't told me it was a sewage drain.
"At least it's not in use. Right now." I pulled the mask around my lower face a little higher, adjusting it so it didn't slip. Ahead of me, the grate bars had been cut and gently laid to the side. I'd scoped everything out and it looked like all was going according to plan. The sky was dark, the only light being the city below. Lines and lines of speeder traffic that never slept traced the sky above the continental plates, always moving somewhere.
Cal and Boden should be in our room by now, ready to act oblivious if the Masters came by looking for me. Cal had my transfer orders with her, freshly printed this morning. She'd get them scanned if required, just enough for the ship to leave.
I breathed, unclenching my hands. For the umpteenth time I checked the strap on my bag, cinching it just a little tighter. Everything was secured properly and as it should be. Any minute now I'd get the go-ahead from Cal. I just had to wait.
My holophone dinged. I pulled out the slim tab, opening the group chat.
'Hey Dury! Where did you go? Are we still on for movie night?'
That was the go ahead.
"Sithspit this is a bad idea. Why did I think this was a good idea?"
I started running, picking up more and more speed as I ran towards the opening. Don't think about it, don't think about it, just breathe and let the force take over. One jump, and just some fancy force pushing to make the landing.
Easy. So easy.
I reached the edge and I leapt into my future.
—
Cal sat alone, camera in her hands. Boden was back in the room ready to provide an alibi for her and Durendal. Originally the plan was for the two of them, but at the last minute she'd had an idea that Boden agreed with.
So here she was, at the level 2 west entrance, with something of a view of the fluid drain. Durendal didn't know she was here, but that was the point. She didn't deserve to do this alone. She wouldn't have to do this alone if anybody at the Temple had given her a chance.
She sent the go-ahead to Durendal, putting her holophone away and clicking record on the camera.
"Showtime," she whispered, ready to film. She didn't need to wait long.
From the opening leapt a figure, force-assisted sprinting sending her straight ahead. Cal panned the camera, zooming in to catch the figure of Durendal flying through the air. She slowly zoomed out to catch the scale of what she was doing, making sure to get all the details she could.
Dury's going to love this when she sees it.
Her trajectory started to dip, turning from a straight line into an arc. Her hands flared out, pushing herself forwards, gaining more distance from the Temple. It was beautiful to watch.
Dury was always better at that stuff than we were. I don't care though, Dury was my friend when nobody else was.
Her arc started to fall, arms flailing a little to slow herself down. She must've already fallen a kilometer from the Temple, and is still going. She was slowing down though, and that knowledge soothed Cal's nerves.
Her feet flared out, and her rate of descent slowed greatly, going from 'terrifying' to 'concerning'. She kept the camera zoomed in now, tracking her profile. Behind her, she could hear the shouts from the Temple, drowned out by the roar of a Consular ship engines burning dirty and doing loops in front of the hangers. And then…
She landed, a tight roll dissipating whatever energy from her fall was left. Relief flooded her, a cold rush that had her feeling heavy. Durendal stood up, looking back at the grate. Her gaze panned left to look right at Cal.
She raised an arm, giving Cal a thumbs-up.
Cal definitely didn't cry.
–
End Chapter 1.