Chapter Text
“Mum, look!” Subaru pressed his mouth to the rumpled neck of the crisp packet he held, blowing as hard as he could until the bag ballooned under his palm. He quickly clenched his fist trapping the air, a wide grin on his lips. A glance over at his father told him both their crisp-bag-balloons were ready; the competition of who-could-make-the-loudest-crisp-bag-balloon- pop was about to begin.
Naoko clapped lightly. “Then, Dad, you go first and then Subaru, OK?”
“Yeah, yeah.” Kenichi grinned, drawing his hands apart. “Watch me, Subaru! It’s going to be the loudest one you’ve ever heard!” With his toothy smile, he clapped his hands together the loud crack of the popping crisp bag echoing sounding in the room. Kenichi cheered to himself, his wife’s soft applause joining his celebration. He pointed at his son. “Beat that!”
Subaru laughed. “Easily!” With a quick movement, he too clapped his hands together, his crisp-packet-turned-balloon cracking the air with its loud bang, a shocked silence following the loud noise when all three flinched in surprise.
Subaru looked nervously at his parents but couldn’t keep the wide grin from his face. “Wooo! I beat you, Dad! Mwahahahahaa!” The boy struck a pose, hip cocked and finger pointed skyward. “I’m Natsuki Subaru! And I just made the loudest crisp-bag-balloon in the whole of Japan!”
Kenichi moaned, dropping his head to the ground, fist lightly thumping the wood floor. “My own son! I’ve been beaten! Mum, do something.”
“Huh? But my baby just won, what would you have me do?”
Kenichi gritted his teeth as Subaru continued to laugh. He pointed at the boy. “Rematch!”
“Of course!” Sabaru agreed easily, snatching another packet of crisps from the table.
Naoko smiled, attempting to keep her eyebrow from ticking. “You know… You should both be ready to eat the proper food that I made rather than spoil your hunger on a game, yes? Or would you rather have a bowl of peas?”
The two men froze, rushing to bow in apology. “Sorry, we’ll come to eat now.”
Subaru straightened from his bow, sharing a look with his dad as they stood. Mum can be scary when she wants to be.
A strange chill ran up his spine.
Subaru froze, shoulders tensing as a coldness brushed his neck.
“Subaru? Are you OK?”
He looked up at his dad, quickly offering a smile. “Yeah!”
Kenichi frowned but continued to the table. “Let’s eat, then!”
“Yeah!” Subaru took a few steps forward only to freeze again when the world suddenly shivered and warped, his balance almost escaping him. He shuddered, rubbing his eyes until the world steadied again.
This time his dad was knelt before him, hands on his shoulders. “Subaru? What’s the matter?”
The boy hesitated, feeling the dampness in his eyes and the wobbling of his lower lip. He bit it, pulling in a breath. “I-I don’t know, I felt something… someone behind me. And then the world went all weird.”
“Weird? Weird how?” Kenichi prompted gently, concern in his eyes; Naoko joined his side.
“It kind of… wiggled and moved-“ he froze, breath catching when the cold returned, sharp and precise like a hand curling around his body. He gasped, reaching for his dad only for a black shadowed hand to pull him away. His scream got trapped in his throat, his dad’s outstretched hand ghosting his own.
He stumbled and dropped to his knees, trying to breathe. His breaths misted in the frigid air, sharp snowflakes scratching his bare face. Snow melted into his cloths, turning his skin red with cold.
Subaru lifted his gaze, staring at the snowy forest he was surrounded by.
Spindly, bare trees stretched skyward, their branches knocking in the wind. Wind howled, snow hushed.
He searched the blank snow. “Dad?” He pushed to his feet, snow swallowing his legs and freezing his bare toes. “Mum?!”
The forest whispered back.
Subaru stumbled into a run, rushing into the forest. “Dad! Mum! Where are you?!” Trees blurred past, his clothes now wet with the melted snow. Subaru clenched his jaw trying to keep his teeth from chattering. “Where are you?!” Tears filled his eyes, the hot liquid burning as it ran down his cheeks. The cold air tore at his throat, mouth going dry as he tried to swallow past the lump in his throat. “Dad!”
His foot suddenly slipped from under him.
The world tilted and he found himself face down in the snow. Subaru coughed, pushing himself upright. Not here. Where are they? He pulled his lips flat trying to keep himself from crying. No… Where am I?
He sniffled, pushing to his feet again and continuing to walk. He was freezing, he could no longer feel his fingers or his toes; his ears burned with the cold. Snow started to settle on his hair.
Maybe… Maybe I should make… a fire. He lost his balance again, falling to his knees. His tears had frozen on his face, the old tracks frozen crisp on his cheeks. He shuddered, breaths unusually fast in his lungs. Die… He gasped, panicking as he tried to get back to his feet and only to return to the frozen ground. I’m going to die.
“Who are you?”
Subaru froze, lifting his gaze to the voice. A small grey cat hovered before him.
Ah, I must be dead already.
The cat zipped closer to his face, forcing Subaru to cross his eyes to see it.
“Well? You look like you’re from the north, with your dark hair.” Its eyes narrowed. “It’s unwise to leave a great spirit waiting.”
Subaru could barely part his lips to reply, let alone understand what it actually meant by any of that. His gaze wandering past the odd cat.
A large glowing crystal stood in the small clearing, snow piling on its top. He stared at it, blinking when he saw a small, silver-haired girl suspended within it.
“Are you here for Emilia?”
Subaru flinched when the cat appeared before him again.
It scowled. “And you have the witch’s scent all over you.” It raised its paw and suddenly Subaru couldn’t breathe.
He couldn’t move his chest or his mouth, his whole body was freezing. Then there was a loud shattering sound and he found himself rolling over the ground.
His beheaded body stared back at him.
Subaru glimpsed the cat slink into his vision before everything went black.
***
Voices hummed distortedly.
Scenes flashes through his mind.
His parents.
The snow.
The forest.
The cat.
The girl.
The girl.
She was crying.
Why?
I want to help her.
She might need my help.
But-
The cat.
Scared.
I’m scared.
I don’t want to see it again.
Dad.
Mum.
I want to go home.
I want to go home.
I want to go home.
I want to go home.
I want to-
***
Subaru gasped, flinching at the rush of noise and colours that flooded his senses.
“Oi, kid, you gonna buy anything or what?”
Subaru blinked, staring at the tall man before him.
“Move along if you have no money.”
The boy stared. “You have green hair.”
“Hah?” The man frowned. “You not from around here, kid?”
Subaru blinked again, glancing around at the cobbled street he found himself on.
Multiple stalls lined the sides, selling various goods ranging from clothing to trinkets, and fresh produce. Odd-looking people roamed them, the majority with blond or brown hair but there were some with stranger colours like purple or green like the man before him. There were even some who looked like a cross between humans and animals, like the woman (?) who just past him with cat ears swivelling on her head.
He cleared his throat, looking back at the green-haired man. “Nope.”
The man sighed, “Whatever, you gonna buy something from here?”
Subaru glanced over the produce, gaze falling on a fresh red apple. “Can I have an apple?”
“A what?”
He pointed. “An apple.”
“You mean an appa.” The man nodded, picking one out before holding out his other hand. “That’s 3-copper coins.”
Copper coins? Subaru shifted nervously. “Erm, sorry. I don’t have any money.”
“Hah?!” The man waved his arm, scowling. “Go away, then! You’re just wasting my time, damn kid!”
***
Crouching against the wall behind him, Subaru ducked his head into his arms and clutched at his chest. A strange hollowness sat against his ribs, clawing at his heart. He swallowed the lump in his throat. What am I doing here? What happened?
He frowned at the memory of the girl in a frozen ice crystal, the snowy forest, the floating cat, the… death. His death.
Breaths quickened in his lungs, the warmth of the sun touching his feet in the shadows of the alley cooling to ice. He felt his lips pull downwards and flattened them quickly, wiping his damp eyes.
I want to go home.
“Oi, kid!”
Subaru flinched half getting up only to freeze when something cool and sharp appeared at his neck.
“You got anything you’d like to give us, eh?” A thin, lanky man glared at him from over the knife. His grey hair, streaked with pink covered his right eye, his sharp tongue flicked over his lips. A set of metal restraints clasped his neck and wrists. The knife twitched at his neck. “Oi, I asked you something. Hand everything over.”
Subaru gasped in a breath, eyes going wide. “I-I don’t have anything.”
“Hah?!”
The hand on the knife shifted, a bruising kick cracking his ribs as he slammed into the ground.
Air was pushed from his lungs, Subaru coughed ribs spasming and sight dimming.
Pain lanced through his body, a metallic taste filling his mouth.
“He doesn’t have anything, Rachins. Not even wearing shoes. Let’s go.”
“Hah?! He’s just hiding what he has, idiot!”
Squinting through his eyelashes, Subaru glimpsed a foot landing on his ribs again. A scream tore from his throat quickly choked by a hand to his mouth.
“Shut it, brat!” Rachins hissed. He scowled, hands quickly rifling through his clothes and pockets. “What are these clothes anyway?” His hands searched the last of his pockets before the man tutted, standing away. “Nothing. Shit!” Another kick landed.
Blood filled Subaru’s mouth, spilling onto the ground.
“Ah! You’ve killed him!”
“What? I didn’t kick him that hard!”
“Damn it! Let’s go! Let’s go!”
Subaru heard their footsteps fade, breaths becoming shallower, a sharp ache growing in his chest. No, I don’t want to die.
He stared at the end of the alley, where the sun shone and people bustled. He dragged himself towards it, ribs knocking against the ground. Then something shifted, hot pain blooming through his chest. His body tried to gasp but the air remained at his lips.
No.
Subaru pushed his lungs to expand, his ribs to move but he was deprived of oxygen.
No.
No.
No.
His vision stuttered.
There were hands then, large warm hands, the familiar face of the Appa man stared back at him.
“Oi, hold on for me, OK?”
Subaru wanted to. He really wanted to.
I don’t want to die.
I don’t want to die.
I don’t want to die.
His sight went black, the world went silent.
***
Voices hummed distortedly.
Scenes flashes through his mind.
The Appa man.
The knife.
Rachins.
The voices.
The beast people.
The stalls.
The girl.
The cat.
I don’t want to die.
***
Subaru gasped, blinking his eyes open. He stumbled to the side, collapsing against the alley wall. His ribs burned, his lungs spasmed, he couldn’t breathe.
It hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts-
“IT HURTS!”
His throat felt raw as he clutched at his ribs, digging his fingers into the flesh.
“It hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts, I want to go home. I want to go home. I want to go home. I want to go home. I want to go home. I want to go home. I want to go home. I want to-“