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Gaku's eyes snap open, and he gasps as if he had been drowning in mud. Disoriented, he glances around to realize that he's in his bedroom, illuminated by the soft light seeping in through the blinds. He takes a moment to just breathe, focusing on the muffled sounds of the city and the warmth of the blanket. He's relieved that the nightmare is over, but the experience is still fresh in his mind.
He instinctively reaches for his phone on the bedside table. It's 6:14 a.m.—his alarm will go off in twenty-six minutes. He drops his head onto the pillow with an exhausted sigh. The last thing he wants is to go back to sleep. He switches off the alarm and puts the phone back. But his body feels heavy, as if gravity is dragging him down, down into the abyss.
Ever since Gaku relived his trauma, he's been afraid of nightmares again. But this wasn't the nightmare he expected. There was no platform or train or casualties, and he didn't wake up shaking and crying. He doesn't even feel like a victim. He feels like a monster. Why does he still remember it? His friends receiving damage from his attacks, their cries followed by his own laughter, the desire to break their spirits... A shiver runs down Gaku's spine, and he thinks he's going to be sick.
If only it was just a dream. Just a product of his subconscious mind. But it was all real. Dark Top was real.
No, no, it's in the past now. He tells himself to keep the dark thoughts at bay.
He swallows hard in an effort to collect himself and finally pushes back the blanket. He has to clear his mind and focus on the present. It's been three days since Death Parade was defeated and his life returned to normal. All of his friends are alive and they've already forgiven him. And he's done his best to redeem himself, hasn't he? So what gives?
Gaku forces himself to get out of bed and approaches the window. When he opens the blinds, his room lights up like a stage. It's plain white with wooden furniture, but it has enough personal touches. Most notably the pink rug on the floor, the pinboard decorated with posters and photos of his friends, and the collection of Super Sentai merchandise from his father in the bookcase.
Gaku moved into this apartment with his mother after his father's death, since it was more affordable. His mother spends most of the day at work, so he takes care of the household. Looking out the window, he can see other apartment units across the street, people making their way to work, and the sunrise-colored sky. The window is cracked open, letting in the crisp, morning air.
Gaku takes a deep breath, then lets it all out. The national dance championship was suspended due to the whole "end of the world" thing, so the remaining teams will perform at a later date. Gaku still wants to win, so he can't let anything distract him. He usually completes his morning routine pretty quickly, but today, he can make himself a nice breakfast. He doesn't even have to worry about missing the bus. (The journey would be much faster by train, but he never takes it.) By the time he makes it to school, the nightmare will be long forgotten.
...
Or maybe not.
Gaku always manages to sit through his classes because he looks forward to dance practice. He's been focusing even less on schoolwork recently. But today, the classes are more of a welcome distraction than anything else. At least they keep his mind off the sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. He jokes around as usual to convince himself that it's not there, hoping that Hayato doesn't notice. But when it's finally time for dance practice, he becomes even more self-conscious.
When Gaku dances, he can forget about everything and just enjoy the moment. That's what Hip-hop is all about, after all. This time too, he tries to lose himself in the rhythm and the familiar choreography. He can see how synchronized his and Hayato's reflections are in the dance studio mirrors. They have both improved immensely since they joined the dance club. They are so close to making their dream come true, so their performance has to be perfect. However, Sasana notes that Gaku's moves are less confident today. When Gaku blames it on a lack of sleep, Kouga reminds him not to stress over the championship too much. Maito adds that it's unusual for him to be tired, but Hayato says nothing.
It's fine. Everyone has already moved on, so Gaku won't look back either. Nevertheless, he can understand the enemies they've fought much better now. It's easy to make the wrong choice when you've lost all hope. Asabuki was in the same boat as him; he didn't mean to hurt anyone either. But still... Gaku knew that the Evil Bracelet would change him, and he took it anyway.
...
One by one, the dance club members leave the studio until only Gaku and his friends are left. When they decide to wrap up, the lights are on in the studio since the sun will set soon. Their muscles hurt in a good way as they drink up the water in their bottles. Before they leave, Gaku and Hayato offer to clean the floor. Hayato brings two brooms from the closet while Gaku brings wet cleaning cloths.
"You did great today, guys," Sasana says, standing by the door alongside Kouga and Maito.
Gaku knows he only praises others when he means it. He runs back and forth from one side of the room to the other, pushing the wet cloth with his broom.
"Thanks, senpai," Hayato replies happily, cleaning the left half of the floor while Gaku cleans the right half.
Gaku definitely wasn't at his best today, but at least he had fun. "Man, it's nice to just focus on dancing," he says with a genuine but slightly hollow smile.
"Right?" Maito replies, wiping the sweat off his brow with a small towel. "I forgot how normal life felt."
Kouga nods, crossing his arms over his chest while watching Gaku and Hayato. "I'm glad I have time to study for finals."
This response punches Gaku right in the gut. Oh yeah, the senpais will graduate soon. He can't picture anyone else as the club's president and vice-president...
"We don't have to skip classes or cancel plans anymore," Sasana says with one hand on his hip and a laid-back expression.
"Or keep secrets from everyone," Hayato chimes in, and all the other boys agree.
Juggling school, dance practice, and Precure work had been quite a hassle. But all their battles seemed easy compared to saving the world. It always sounds cool in movies, but it's way scarier in reality. Gaku doesn't need recognition, he's just glad that everyone survived... Even so, leaving their secret lives behind feels kinda bittersweet.
Gaku has made an effort to clean the floor quickly, so he's already on Hayato's side of the room when they meet. They exchange a smile and put the wet cloths next to each other. Then they take off with their brooms in hand, cleaning the last two stripes of floor left. With their work finished, the boys head out of the studio, and Sasana locks the door behind them.
"I wonder how Padocchi is doing," Gaku breaks the silence as the boys make their way down the hallway. Today's practice has tired him out more than usual. The school is quiet at this hour since most clubs have already wrapped up.
At first, Gaku was shocked by Pas De Deux's betrayal when he revealed his true motive. But now, he has no right to talk. After the fairy told him about Duet, Gaku actually felt a connection with him. Padocchi had lost his only friend and was willing to do anything to bring him back.
"Yeah, I hope he's not lonely in Hope Beat," Hayato replies with the same expression: relaxed but betraying a sense of sadness.
"I'm sure he's helping its inhabitants like he promised," Kouga says.
The senpais are leading the group so Gaku can't see their faces. But he is sure they miss the fairy the most since they knew him longer. It must have been hard for Padocchi to move to Hope Beat, but he wanted to make up for his crimes by doing good deeds in Duet's place.
"Don't worry. I know we'll see him again," Sasana says, turning around to give the trio a reassuring smile.
They're almost at the locker rooms when they hear distant footsteps, probably of the last students in the building. That's when Maito speaks up. "I hope so. We wouldn't be here without him."
This statement hits Gaku hard. He isn't sure if Maito is referring to the fact that Padocchi brought them together or that he saved their lives back at the dark castle. Probably both. He wants to lighten the mood somehow.
"Aren't you glad we're together?" he says, elbowing his kouhai with a teasing grin.
"Don't push it," Maito replies, clearly feigning his annoyance.
Their exchange makes Hayato chuckle, and the other boys follow suit, even Maito. Not because they said something funny but because everything is back to normal. At least that's what Gaku wants to believe.
...
The sunset is especially beautiful today, with an orange glow and pink clouds on the horizon. The street, the rows of buildings, everything basks in the warm echoes of daylight. Gaku and Hayato have just parted ways with their friends, who went to the train station. Now they're heading to the nearest bus stop with their school bag on one shoulder and their gym bag on the other. They live in the same neighborhood, so they usually travel from school together. (Hayato takes the train in the morning. Gaku can't ask him to get up early because of him.)
Anyway, Gaku has absolutely no reason to feel nervous around Hayato. Hayato, who gave him a reason to smile and a dream to follow. Hayato, who saved him from the depths of despair twice. Hayato, who didn't flinch when Gaku beat his face in. Thank goodness he didn't leave any scars. Well, at least not physical ones...
If you could go back in time, you'd never wanna be my friend.
Dark Top's words resurface in his mind like a haunting echo, and he shudders. How could he have said something like that to his best friend?
"Hey, Hayato?"
Once Gaku strikes up a conversation, the blue-haired boy turns to him. "Yeah?"
Gaku hesitates, not because he's embarrassed but because he knows he doesn't deserve this privilege. "I just... I'm really glad we're friends." He says this from the bottom of his heart. He hopes that Hayato believes him.
The other boy blinks in surprise. Then he chuckles softly. "Me too, man."
This makes Gaku feel a bit better. He puts his hand on Hayato's shoulder to convey his feelings clearly. "So if you ever need anything, just ask, okay?" He means it; he wants to be the friend that Hayato deserves.
However, his words seem to have the opposite effect as Hayato's smile fades. One might even say he looks concerned. "Gaku, is everything alright?"
Gaku's heart skips a beat. Which is weird considering that everything is perfectly fine. "What? Yeah, why?" he blurts out, trying to act casual.
Hayato rubs the back of his neck as if he's not sure how to approach the subject. "Well... we've all been through a lot."
Anxiety washes over Gaku like a cold wave. Nothing is back to normal. No matter what he does, he can't erase his friends' memories of that day. "I know but..." he says, mustering the courage to smile again. "It's behind us now, right?"
Hayato seems to realize that he's made things worse. "Right. Yeah," he agrees, shifting his gaze.
The muffled sounds of the city grow louder as the boys walk down the quiet street. There aren't many people or cars around at this time of day.
Gaku knows he can be honest with Hayato, but talking about his guilt feels so selfish. Then again... the last time he bottled up his feelings, the outcome was disastrous. Maybe it's better to let it out now, as much as he doesn't want to. At the very least, this awkward silence will end.
Gaku sighs in resignation, trying to calm his nerves. "I just had a bad dream tonight, that's all." His voice is quiet and timid but it immediately catches Hayato's attention.
"What kind of dream?" the blue-haired boy asks him carefully.
Gaku's anxiety spikes. He feels as if a giant hand is gripping him, making it harder to breathe. "Well... I..." He tries to speak but his throat feels too tight. "I remembered all the bad things I'd done..." He almost whispers.
There. Now Hayato knows exactly what he means. It can't get any worse than this.
Hayato's lips part and he looks even more concerned. Then he puts his hand on Gaku's shoulder, making him stop. "Gaku, that wasn't your fault, okay?"
What?
It's as if something inside Gaku has snapped. A surge of indignation rises from his stomach into his throat. Does Hayato want to make him feel better by lying to him?
"How was it not my fault?" He argues, pushing Hayato's hand away.
But the other boy doesn't budge. He only takes a step back, wearing an expression that Gaku has never seen on him before.
"If I had protected you, it wouldn't have happened!"
This is enough to make Gaku's jaw drop. Is Hayato still trying to console him, or does he actually believe that? There's no way. Hayato's the victim here, not him!
"It was my own decision!" Gaku finally retorts, slapping his hand on his chest.
Wasn't his situation kinda like being under the influence? In such a case, the person would be held accountable for their crime, even if they hadn't been in their right mind. So of course he's guilty!
However, Hayato lifts his hands desperately and argues back. "Anyone would break down in that situation!"
Gaku stares at the boy, not knowing how to respond, while Hayato composes himself. He looks at Gaku with nothing but sympathy and trust. "I don't know what the king did to you, but I know you held out as long as you could."
Held out
The phrase reverberates in Gaku's mind. Come to think of it, he'd been holding out ever since he recognized Asabuki. The king just forced him to confront his trauma head-on, along with everything else he'd buried deep inside his heart. The wish that his father hadn't become a hero. The fear that he could lose his friends the same way.
Hot tears prick in the corners of his eyes. He steps away from Hayato and bows deeply.
"I'm sorry!" The apology comes from his very soul as he shuts his eyes. "I- I couldn't lose you all too... so..." His voice hitches, and the ground below him becomes blurry.
"Gaku," Hayato utters, clearly shocked, but Gaku pays him no mind.
After seeing his friends fall off the platform and then reliving the moment when his father died, Gaku thought his heart would burst. He felt so powerless back then, so overwhelmed with grief. He knew that if they kept fighting, his friends would die before his eyes for real. Because that was the fate of all heroes. When he was offered the Evil Bracelet, the message was clear.
"I lost myself instead! I'm so sorry..." The words fade into a sob as he closes his eyes again. He can't stop the tears from dripping onto the sidewalk.
Suddenly, a gentle hand lands on his shoulder. Gaku raises his head to see Hayato who seems to be on the verge of tears himself.
"Hey, it's okay," he says softly, gesturing to Gaku to stop bowing. When Gaku straightens his back, Hayato doesn't ask for permission and just wraps his arms around him.
Gaku stands there in complete shock as Hayato rests his head on his shoulder.
"We're all just glad you're here."
He can't see the boy's face but he can tell that Hayato means every word. It's as if a dam broke and his emotions came pouring out. "You're you and you're alive. What more could I want?"
Gaku feels Hayato's hands on his back, his chest pressed against his. The embrace is so warm, so loving that it brings more tears to his eyes. He really gave Hayato a scare when he almost died saving the king, didn't he?
"Really?" he utters, still processing Hayato's words.
His best friend finally lets him go, and Gaku notices that his eyes are glossy. "Really. So don't feel bad anymore, okay?" he says with a supportive smile.
The warmth of the hug still lingers. Gaku feels lighter somehow, as if a huge weight had been lifted off his chest. What's his guilt and shame compared to the love he receives from his friends? They're here for him and he's here for them, like it always has been. The only person who hasn't forgiven him is himself.
He hastily dries his tears before meeting Hayato's gaze again. "Okay," he breathes out, letting a real smile cross his face. "Thank you."
Hayato's eyes reflect his relief as he mellows out too. "Anytime, bro."
The sun has already set, leaving an afterglow in the sky. It's getting dark, but the boys are still standing on the sidewalk. After they've calmed down a bit, Hayato slaps his forehead.
"Oh, the bus!"
Gaku realizes he completely forgot about that. Hayato quickly takes his phone out of his pocket to check the time.
"We can make it if we run!" He says urgently.
It would take about 15 minutes for another bus to arrive, which isn't too bad. But Gaku thinks running would be more fun.
The boys exchange a nod and start sprinting down the sidewalk. Turning a corner, they spot their bus at the bus stop with the last person getting on. They speed up, trying to hold onto their bags.
The back doors are open, and Gaku leaps through them, barely keeping his balance. Then he gives Hayato a hand and practically pulls him inside. Just then, the doors close and the bus starts to move. Panting, the boys fumble for their IC cards in their bags and tap the reader. Having grabbed the nearest pole, their eyes meet, and they burst into giggles. They probably look ridiculous and smell even worse. No one would ever guess that they're the Pretty Cures.
Traveling by bus is all Gaku knows, but it's not exactly convenient. He's also missing out on traveling with the rest of his friends. Maybe if Hayato were there with him, he could find the courage to face his fear. Maybe taking the train with his friends wouldn't be so bad. Gaku closes his eyes and breathes in.
He truly has the best friends in the world.
Throughout their journey as Pretty Cures, they have learned more about each other and themselves. But if anyone can harbor the rhythm of light, then maybe they don't need magic to fight despair anymore. As long as they hold onto hope, they can keep moving forward. Not only that, they can share their light with others to lead them out of darkness.
That's the kind of hero Gaku wants to be.