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If Only I’d Thought of the Right Words

Summary:

It is the night before Mikotoba is to leave for Japan. Sholmes cannot admit his true feelings.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

“I am not fit to be a father.”

“You must be.”

“How am I supposed to do such a thing without you?”

“You have to try, Sholmes. She has no where else to-”

“I’m not denying her, Mikotoba, it is my own abilities that I worry about.”

“...Yes, well, you must at least give yourself a chance. You must learn that you cannot live with me forever.”

“Do not say that. I cannot bear to think of it.”

“You don’t have to. You- we are going to be fine.”

“How am I to be fine when I have nobody?”

“You have Mycroft.”

“He is not the same. He is my brother, you’re…”

“A friend?”

“That isn’t the right word.”

“No… I suppose it isn’t.”

“I don’t suppose there is a word.”

“Partner?”

“That… People could get the wrong idea.”

“And yet you have been calling me your partner for the last 6 years.”

"...Touché.”

“Look, it’s not as if I want to leave you either. You know I’d rather stay. But you also know this was inevitable, no matter how soon the time would come.”

“I simply thought I’d have more time to… More time with you.”

“So did I.”

“I’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you too.”

“I… appreciate you.”

“W-well, thank you. As do I.”

“You know, Mikotoba, I… wouldn’t mind if people got the wrong idea.”

“Hm? About what?”

“About us.”

“I believe many already have.”

“Do you mind it?”

“I think it best not to pay attention to it. It’s not as if it will be a problem anymore, anyway.”

“...No, I suppose… I suppose not.”

“We have an early morning ahead of us, Sholmes. Shall we sleep?”

“I’m not sure I’m ready to say goodbye.”

“So… no?”

“No. I still have something I have to tell you.”

“What’s on your mind, Sholmes?”

“I… erm, I don’t know.”

“Right.”

“I simply thought I’d let you know that I… am utterly enamoured by your presence.”

“Oh. Ah, thank you.”

“And that I’m going to miss you.”

“I believe you have already said that.”

“...Yes, I must have. Goodnight.”

“Oh? I thought you might have something else to-”

“Goodnight. I can’t bear it any longer, goodnight.”

“...Goodnight.”

Notes:

Guy who has been obsessed with one ship for the past 4 years: No I actually can't decide how they'd confess to each other

This was originally going to be a FIC fic and not just a dialogue fic but I am so very tired. So it is a dialogue fic my apollo cheese

(title is from the cure's "pictures of you". it's probably obvious because it's a very famous song but i thought i'd say anyway. that song is so homumiko. add it to your homumiko playlists. please.)