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You know what you have to do.
The words boomed in Azzlore’s head like thunder.
He was lying down in bed in his room on the Peralta, recovering from his most recent skirmish with the Saltborn Fleet.
It wasn’t the first time he was attacked by the Saltborn Fleet. The Phantom Raiders were feuding with them, so it didn’t phase him when they attacked their ships.
But this time it was different.
This time, they ambushed him outside of a tavern. He was so drunk he didn’t even see it coming.
A swift hit to his temple, and then lights out he went.
All he remembered was waking up to being strung from the ceiling by his feet with cuts and burns all over his body and arms. In between gaining and losing consciousness he remembered figures coming in and out trying to extract information out of him.
He had no clue how long he was there for. Could have been days, could have been weeks.
And then suddenly, he was being rescued by Kalethor, Peren, and Sandhya.
And now here he was. Faced with an impossible task.
Azzlore thought about a lot of things while he sat in that bed.
He thought about his parents. He thought about his fathers decision to step away from his life as a pirate.
How he did it because of him.
And here Azzlore was trying to follow in his fathers footsteps, risking his life to do so.
He thought about his training, how Sharog was on his ass about getting stronger and better with the sword, and all the while pestering him about where he was going late at night.
He thought about how owed the Phantom Raiders his life. They rescued him, and thanks to them he survived.
Surely now is the time to start taking this shit seriously?
But mostly, he thought of Jane.
How was she doing? Did she know where he was? What had happened to him?
He thought about her waiting for him each month.
He remembered their promise.
“You’ll always come back to me, right angel?”
He remembered looking into her beautiful eyes, and seeing the fire that burned inside of her.
“I promise.”
And now he was going to have to break her heart.
Azzlore rises from his bed, and before he makes his death march, he looks back to the belaying pin on his nightstand.
It was the same pin that he used on the day he met Jane.
Azzlore opens the door, and makes his way up the bow of the ship to unboard the Peralta.
The moon is full and shining bright, illuminating the black ocean below.
The tide rose towards the shore and shifted the sand forward and back with each wave. The breeze is moving a salty fragrance through the air.
Hidden by the rocky shoreline and shrubbery lies a secret beach.
The location of this secret beach has been disputed for years amongst the people of Rose Quartz Island. As a result, not many people knew of its exact whereabouts.
However, every month when the moon is full, two lovers claim the beach as their own, and spend their moments laughing and retelling stories of grand adventures until the sun comes up.
The first figure to arrive was Jane, marked by her bright red hair and amber eyes, which gleamed in the light of the lantern that lay beside her, waiting.
Jane was always the first to arrive. It was like a ritual to her. Wait until mom and dad were asleep, sneak out of her bedroom window, and carefully tiptoe past her family’s garden onto the beach.
She would wait for Azzlore at the same spot each time. She never dared to stand in a different spot, fearing that he would get lost somehow.
She was anxious to see him. She always was, even though they had been dating for a little over two years now. They only saw each other for a few days at a time, and always at night. Azzlore could never meet her in the daytime.
His life was too complicated for that.
But nevertheless, she met him underneath every full moon. And he always came, just like he promised.
She waits for what feels like eternity, but suddenly along the horizon, a tall, red skinned figure makes its way through the rocks and trees towards the shore.
His face, scarred and rough, is illuminated from the glow of the lantern in his bandaged, wrapped hands. His gaze scans the shoreline for Jane.
As soon as he spots her, he can’t help but watch.
He always found her waiting in the sand, waves crashing in and out, and the moon outlining her figure, as beautiful as she always was.
This time she was sitting in the surf, swirling the salty water in her fingers. Her hair revealed to be dark maroon in the glow of the moon, her dress faded from being in the sun, and skin as pale as jasmine.
Before he got to the shore, Azzlore stopped in his tracks to look at her.
Azzlore always hung back for a second before he made her aware of his presence. He liked to take in her innocence for a few extra seconds before he told her of his harrowing encounters.
But this time, he held back for longer than usual.
Because this time would be the last time he saw his beautiful, brilliant Jane.
This is it, he thought to himself.
You just walk up to her, tell her the truth, and leave.
“Hey, I just got kidnapped and tortured by the Saltborn Fleet for being with the Phantom Raiders. I almost died, and it made me realize that I’ll drag you down with me!”
You can’t be with her, Azzlore reasoned with himself.
She’s too good to know the horrors you’ve caused. All the pain you’ve inflicted.
What kind of a life would we have together? She waits for me at every full moon for the rest of her life? What happens if I don’t come back? If it wasn’t for Kal and Peren and Sandhya I would be dead.
She doesn’t deserve that. She’ll be better off for it.
And so with a lump in his throat, Azzlore breaks himself from her trance and continues towards her.
Azzlore felt the weight of the sand shift underneath his boots. Every step he took felt like the full force of gravity was trying to hold him back.
I can’t do this, he thought.
Maybe I can turn back. Maybe she won’t see me. Maybe I can-
Before he could finish his thought she turned her head around.
“Hey, you!” Jane exclaimed.
She got up from the ground, the water soaking the bottom of her dress, and stood in front of Azzlore.
“I was starting to think you’d never come!”
She went to embrace Azzlore, but as soon as she met his gaze she could instantly tell something was wrong.
Her face fell, crinkles formed on her forehead, and she cocked her head slightly.
“What’s wrong angel?”, she questioned.
“What happened to you?”, she reached for the bandages on his hands.
He always remembered the look on her face at that moment.
He pulled his hands away, and before Azzlore could speak, he cleared his throat.
“We need to talk.”
As soon as the words left his lips, the lump in his throat became a pit in his stomach.
Like the feeling you get when you’re about to drop a bomb on a village.
The look of concern on Jane’s face changed to confusion.
“What about?”, she inquired.
With each syllable her tone grew more grave.
“I, um,” Azzlore muttered, his gaze shifting from the ocean to Jane and then to the floor,
“I can’t be with you anymore”.
The words were almost a whisper.
“What? I-I don't understand.”
The look of confusion was quickly replaced by the look of concern that littered her face moments before.
“I can’t be with you Jane. It’s over.”
He could barely look her in the eyes.
She stood there for a moment, in pure shock of the situation.
“Azzlore what do you mean?” she asked, her voice cracking when she spoke his name.
He could see the tears building in her eyes.
Azzlore stood before her, barely able to get the words out, still avoiding eye contact.
Finally, he ripped off the bandaid.
“It means that I can’t keep coming here. I have to go.”
He turned to walk away, but before he could take a step he felt her hand on his wrist.
“Wait!” she cried, her grasp firm.
“Can’t we talk about this?”, the look in her eyes frantic, panicking.
Suddenly, it dawned on him.
She’s not gonna stop.
Knowing now what he must do, he looked back, first at her hand on his wrist, and then slowly looked up to meet her gaze.
“What’s there to talk about?”
The words felt like knives, cutting her with each second that passed by.
And just like that, Azzlore watched the fire in her eyes die out.
It felt like treason to be so cruel to her. Because in his heart of hearts, Azzlore loved Jane. But he knew deep down that the longer he clung to her, the faster she’d drown right alongside him.
She stared at him for a moment, the light casting his shadow on the sand, searching for something in his gaze that told her that it was a lie.
She found nothing.
Nothing but a blank stare.
Azzlore shakes his arm, almost losing his balance, and releases him from her grasp.
“I’m sorry. Have a nice life.”, he spits out before regaining his balance and turning his back to her.
He trudges through the sand and makes his way back up the beach. No matter how hard he tried to fight it, he couldn’t help the tears that started to flow.
He tried to stifle the sounds of his sobs, all the while trying to remain strong and fight the urge inside of him that told him to turn around.
Every fiber of his being was screaming at him, and every step felt like he was being swallowed by the sand.
Soon enough, the sand became dirt, and the dirt became cobblestone streets.
Everything was a blur to him. All the buildings, all the faces, all the lights, they all became one giant smudged mural.
It didn’t become clear to him until after the Peralta was sailing out of the harbor.
From the bow, Azzlore stood against the railing and watched Rose Quartz Island become smaller and smaller until it was just a speck on the horizon.
To this day, Azzlore has never returned to Rose Quartz Island, afraid that if he does he may have to face her.
Unsure of what would come of that, good or bad, he owed it to her to stay away.
She watches him disappear into the tree line, and it isn’t until she can’t see his silhouette, or even his shadow before she allows herself to cry.
The tears were hot, and they stung her eyes as they fell down her now flushed cheeks. With the waves crashing into the back of her knees, she stood there, in shock.
The only thing she wanted to know was why.
That was the only thing she couldn’t figure out.
It doesn’t make any sense.
What did I do?
Why won’t he tell me what’s wrong?
A million things raced through her mind that night. But out of those million things, the one thing that remained constant was the despair she felt.
She spent the rest of that night sitting on the beach, in the sand, hoping, praying, that maybe, he would change his mind.
When Azzlore didn’t come back that night she took it as a sign that he meant his word.
She picked herself up, and when she walked back home that morning, the sun barely rising over the horizon, the reality of it all finally started to sink in.
Azzlore was gone. And he wasn’t coming back.
“i loved you, i still do. just wanted passion from you, just wanted what i gave you. i waited, and waited.”