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When the car came to a stop in the loop of their driveway, it was much later than Shane had hoped. Ilya, who had been quiet from the arena in New York to their hotel to the plane to the backseat, was out of the car and rushing to the front door before Shane could unbuckle his seat belt.
Shane didn’t blame him. He wanted to run too. But he had enough thought to thank their driver who helped him retrieve their bags.
They had endured a grueling week of losses. But it was still early enough in the season, they could come back from it. Even while Ilya nursed an injured shoulder and Shane’s knee still bothered him from last season. They had two more cups under their belts with the Centaurs, if they never won another game, they would still have left their mark on the league. If it all came to an end tomorrow, if he never played hockey again, Shane would be satisfied. Which wasn’t a sentiment until recently.
Not until Leo. Their son.
His parents had spent the week keeping watch over him at Shane and Ilya’s house. It was easier that way. They had helped so much over the past two years, staying home with him, traveling with them, bringing him to their games whenever possible. He vividly remembered the very first time he looked out in the stands and saw his mom holding up their tiny baby with tiny earmuffs over his head, in a tiny Centaurs jersey, Hollander and 81 across the back. He remembered every single time since.
Shane hoped he was still awake. For his sake, but mostly for his husband’s.
If there was one thing Ilya needed right now, it was Leo Cuddles.
Thankfully, he was awake, but just barely. His parents had him dressed for bed, an olive green shirt and light pajama pants, silky jet black hair swept back with the softest brush Shane could find.
He was Shane made over.
Only a round pout inherited from Svetlana. As if they needed another reason to give him anything he could ever want and more.
Ilya still teased his best friend about her genes not even trying, but everyone knew he was the most affected by Leo’s dark brown eyes and freckles, including Leo himself.
Ilya already had him in his arms when Shane set their bags down in the foyer and took off his shoes. Ilya still had his on, but Shane didn’t care.
Anya nudged gently at Ilya’s knees, welcoming him home and seeking to offer comfort, as always. She trotted over to Shane to do the same, and he bent down to give her some rubs over the scruff behind her floppy ears. She was starting to slow down in her age but she had been a guardian over Leo since they brought him home. They even kept a bed for her in the corner of his nursery.
He spotted his mom on the couch, a clutter of books and toys next to her, including a piano from Luca that was blissfully quiet but was still flashing bright rainbow lights. He could see his dad back in the kitchen, rinsing a couple of mugs and a sippy cup in the sink.
But Shane could only focus on the man standing in the center of the room, cuddling their son to his chest. He could see the way Ilya’s shoulders lifted in a slow, deep breath, the first in days. His eyes were closed, but the second he sensed Shane, he opened them and turned toward him. Leo followed and their cheeks squished together.
“Say hi to daddy, moyo lapochka,” Ilya said gently and then moved closer, meeting Shane halfway until there was no space between them.
“Hi, daddy,” Leo parroted in his sweet little voice. Only two years old and he could actually do that in four different languages. He knew more Japanese than Shane.
The second Shane touched his small back, feeling his chest rise and fall beneath Ilya’s arms, his heart felt whole again.
“Hi, baby. I missed you.”
Leo smelled like his expensive baby shampoo and the same lotion his nana had used on Shane that kept his skin unbelievably soft. He didn’t try to wiggle out of Ilya’s hold like he typically would to get to Shane, just so he could switch back a few minutes later, again and again until he got his fill of both of them. But he reached one hand out to Shane until it cupped around his cheek.
“You want to sleep in bed with papa and me tonight?”
Leo nodded. Ilya nodded. Both pouted.
Shane chuckled and turned his face to kiss the palm of his son’s hand. Then he leaned forward and kissed his soft, pink cheek and then did the same to Ilya’s.
“Good, you two go ahead. I’ll be up in a minute.”
Ilya only managed a nod to his parents before he headed upstairs, Leo’s head tucked down against his shoulder.
“Bad day?”
His dad’s question only came after Ilya had disappeared, but he already knew the answer. Sometimes, Shane still thought of his parents as that, his, but it was only out of twenty something years of habit. Because he knew that they cared for Ilya the same as they cared for him. They loved Ilya and hated seeing him struggle just as Shane did.
“Bad week,” he sighed, “But I think he’ll be okay now that we’re home.”
“He will be,” dad said, certain as he came to stand behind his mom on the couch.
Mom spoke up, “Taiyo will probably crash any second now, if he hasn’t already. We did what we could to keep him awake until you got here.”
She started to gather the mess of books and toys, but Shane quickly told her not to worry about it. But then his dad was already there, helping her clean up.
“Call us if you need anything, okay?” Dad said just a few minutes later at the front door.
Shane nodded, his throat getting tight. “Thank you, dad, mom. Seriously, we couldn’t do this without you.”
“You do not need to thank us as far as that perfect little boy is concerned,” Mom said adamantly. “We should be the ones thanking you and Ilya.”
Shane’s eyes teared up and then they pulled him in on either side.
It had been a long week for him too. He hadn’t realized a hug from the two of them was exactly what he needed. Ilya would get his turn once his head cleared and once they’d spent a few days alone with Leo, as they always did after returning from extended periods away.
Mom and dad promised to text him when they got home and he promised they would make dinner plans soon. Then he took Anya out into their sprawling back yard for a little while before he locked everything down. She stopped for some water from her bowl that was full. His parents truly didn’t miss anything.
Upstairs was quiet, and he kept his movements the same until he could hear the softest murmurs from inside their bedroom. He was surprised to find them still awake.
He leaned against the doorframe and listened to his husband and their toddler speaking quietly in Russian, Ilya on his good side curled around Leo.
Ilya asked what grandpa made for dinner. Then about bath time. And then their trip to the zoo earlier in the week with the twins and Arthur and Amber.
The Pikes were obsessed with him and had been since the day they met him, just a couple days after he was born. Shane had always loved those kids, but he somehow loved them even more as they were the cousins he couldn’t give his child and they all took their role very seriously.
Ilya looked brighter as he hung onto Leo’s every word, like he fully comprehended every slow and mumbled sound he made. Leo was fighting his sleep, and some French words mixing into his sweet Russian accent made Ilya chuckle softly. It was all music to Shane’s ears.
Maybe it was selfish of them to have brought Leo into the world when they weren’t ready to give up their careers just yet. They were still young, maybe they could have waited a little longer.
The first year had been rough. They spent so much time away after two short months of paternity leave over the summer, they both worried he wouldn’t know who they were each time they came back. But watching them now, seeing how Ilya looked at him like he was the entire universe, how Leo gripped at Ilya’s (Shane’s) hoodie in a tight fist, Shane knew that could never be true. He knew there was no possibility of the scene before him being anything but good. Leo was meant to be theirs, right here, right now.
They had been talking about retirement. It was something big and heavy over them. But if this was what they had to look forward to afterwards, maybe a sister for Leo, maybe two, then it too could only be something good.
Shane couldn’t stand to be away from his family a second longer. So he kept the door cracked for Anya and then crept over to them.
“Is there enough room for daddy?”
“Always,” was Ilya’s quick reply.
Shane carefully crawled into bed, said, “Come here,” and they both did.
He got Leo settled over his chest so that he was on his side facing Ilya, who snuggled in as close as possible under Shane’s other arm, their faces tucked together under Shane’s chin.
It wasn’t long before they were both asleep in his arms, sharing the same air, and Shane smiled.