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"SPROUT SEEDLY, YOU'RE THE BIGGEST FLAKE IN THE WORLD!"
"Wow, that'll totally get him out of wherever he's run off to."
"Shut it! Just because you're his best friend, doesn't mean you know everything about him!"
Cosmo and Dandy didn't like working together...
I mean, Dandy knew it wasn't his fault, he heard Cosmo himself say word for word, '…Uhm, no thanks Shelly. I think Dandy is the last person I want to ask.' And guess what? His stupid plant died because Cosmo was over watering it, and he cried. Cosmo was so annoying!
Cosmo knew it wasn't his fault either, It's like he hated them! He said it himself, 'Sprout! He sure knows how to push people... -To do their best!' How uncalled for! The amount of audacity Dandy has to say that and yell at Cosmo? He just couldn't comprehend it...
"Well, what's your idea then? Since you're such the Sprout expert, "
This was gonna be a long search.
"Okay, if you're gonna try and help me find him, the yelling stops now, got it?"
"No promises!"
"Dandy!"
"At least I was honest..."
Cosmo sighed, "Just...pretend it's for the show, like you have to whip out another grand Dandy performance or whatever..."
"I would never call it that."
"Stop trying to be a smartass and help me find Sprout..."
"Ookie Dokie!!"
Cosmo groaned.
Yeah, Dandy's stupid smile and tacky petals pissed him off as much as the next toon, but when Sprout worked up...it was...different per say...
Usually, Sprout was easily one of the most put together of all of them. He'd check on everyone to see if they were alright, offering to do busy work, and/or baking with that too large smile and those dead eyes plastered upon his face. But, sometimes, he'd flip a switch. He'd speak before thinking, take off vital cookware that'd keep him safe...and um, bite? Cosmo knew exactly why, but he could never tell Dandy. Trusting a toon like that with this? Just a recipe for disaster!
"Hey Cosmo, you busy?" Astro's somber voice crept up on him.
Cosmo snapped back to his senses.
"Oh um, I'm-"
"Completely occupied! Sorry friend-os!"
Did everything out of Dandy's mouth have to be so pitchy and dated?
"...is it an emergency? We could really use some aid. When we asked Sprout, he told Vee to die over and over again, then he threw a used glass at her."
Oh no.
Oh no, no, no.
"Yeah, so um-"
"Do you know where he ran off to?!"
"...that way, but Vee's screen-"
Cosmo booked it out of the room, Dandy waved and trailed after him.
"Mhm, okay, awesome!" Vee rolled her eyes
"...I'll ask Brightney for help with your screen."
Cosmo saw a trail of dirty footprints leading to the outdoors.
"Dandy, what does literally everyone say about outside messes and your dog?"
"You think my baby wears size 9 js???"
"No- I mean Pebble needs to stop stealing shoes, Dandy."
The duo heard a light panting behind them.
"BUDDY! Oh, who's a good boy!"
...Cosmo felt a slight rage sinking in, they didn't have time for this!
"Dandy, unless Pebble can-"
"Ohhh, and you have Sprout's shoe? Do you know where he is? Good boy!"
He did?
Cosmo looked a little closer, and sure enough, a single shoe and a clear print lay at the top of Pebble's head.
"I'll give you a treat if you show us where he is, would you do it for a treat?"
Pebble's eyes lit up as the magic word graced his ears. He barked, and scurried off with Cosmo and Dandy in tow. Though, it didn't take him long to lead them there...
The second the humid air hit them, so did the sad sight of Sprout Seedly hiding in...the dirt? (specifically that of Dandy's garden). Something was clearly off, though...
"Sprout? Sprout Seedly?"
Sprout whipped his head around to reveal a bit of a...jarring sight. First of all, he was covered in dirt...additionally, he looked like he'd been crying a while, that his nose was running, and like he had been biting at himself due to lack of a better focus. This only served to worry Cosmo, who was horrified at what Dandy might say about this.
"You uh...okay there?" Dandy asked
"DIE"
"Pardon?"
"MhhhhhgGGGmmdieee"
"Ah,"
'Ah' what?! Did he think he was serious? How the hell would he clarify that Sprout was just-
"He's little, right?"
Oh. That's how I guess.
"...I ddunno what you mean"
"Cosmo, c'mon, I know what a little is. I'm not freaked out or anything either! I just feel like-"
"MmmghmnjgNOTlittle"
They refocused their attention on the strawberry in front of them, and Dandy let out a quick laugh followed by an even quicker lie.
"Oh, I meant Cosmo! Look at how tiny he is, three apples tall and whatnot?"
Sprout looked unimpressed, which, combined with his intense dizziness, sweat drenching his clothes, and the limit of his body being even less than that of his mind, didn't put him in any better of a mood.
"NNNngh 'y twoshoudl DIE alreadyyy," Sprout laboriously pulled himself up as the two looked at him in concern, he seemed to really be struggling...
"Would you like to hold my hand?" Cosmo stuck it out to guide him, which earned blown raspberries in response. Dandy looked at Cosmo, whispered "watch," and took a breath
"Well, that's good for Cosmo because you're not allowed to hold my hand! It's all off limits!"
That caught Sprout's attention, something he couldn't do? Pfft, maybe in their dreams! He went to prove Dandy wrong by wobbling over and darting to get a grasp of it. It only took a little while to get a hold of it, too. Dandy must be no match for him!
"Hey! Let go, I said that you're not allowed to hold my hand!" Dandy feigned annoyance while Cosmo led them away.
"Mmnuhuh I do it." Sprout giggled at the prospect of so much control over these two, it made him wonder - how else could he get them?
Dandy quickly lowered his tone, "Where are we going?" He said, interrupting himself every so often to exchange quips
"Well, room to get him equipped, bath cause he smells, and maybe in a perfect world I can get him to bed?"
"Yeah, and I've been relevant post 2002"
Cosmo opened his mouth to say something, but quickly shut it.
"Dnady tha means y' died"
"Well, that isn't very kind Seedling," the nickname just slipped from Dandy's mouth
"Mnmm Veevee died too,"
"We saw..."
Cosmo pushed open the door to Sprout's room- only to be greeted by a colossal dumpster fire
"...Sprout did...you do this?"
"I killed m' room."
"...Awesome"
The duo decided Dandy's room would do, it was more secluded anyway.
Sprout was being difficult again
The second Dandy had let go of his hand to run the water, he had started to fuss, and all the bases there were left to cover stressed him out more.
"C'mon Peapod, you need to take your clothes off."
"Fuckin' stupid..."
"Sprout, we don't talk like that." Cosmo sighed
"Fuckin' stupid fuckin' stupid f-"
Cosmo covered his ears and closed his eyes, which made Sprout pause and look at him inquisitively. He poked Cosmo and shook him in order to try and get his attention.
"Co'mo?"
Sprout had little patience for how weird Dandy and Cosmo were being, so the tears quickly stinged.
"Mmm, sorry?"
Cosmo didn't budge, so, in order to remedy this, Sprout opened his mouth and-
"OW!! Did you bite me???"
Sprout whined, and tears rolled down his cheeks.
"Y' werent lis'enING T MMmeee" Sprout faceplanted onto the floor and ripped out shreds of carpet, Cosmo sighed.
"The waters warmed up, I added some bubbles and str- oh." Dandy knelt down next to Sprout and rubbed his back, which made him push Dandy off.
"Well, since Sprout won't go and I have the option between this nice flower towel and this cool star one, I'll just have to take the warm bubble bath instead of him!" Dandy pretended to walk away,
Sprout sniffled, grumbled, and pointed to the flower towel.
"What's the magic word?"
Sprout snatched the towel and stumbled into the bath, Cosmo sighed, and both of them gathered all of his stuff and followed. Cosmo helped him unbutton, untie, and unzip everything he needed help with and undid his hair, then, Sprout sank into the water.
The worst part of it? It was perfect.
The warm water washed away all of his pain. He felt all the worries of the day splash away with the water, the bubbles were all pretty and shiny with rainbow colors, and Dandy had started to rub his back in all the right ways.
"Feels good, huh?" Sprout wasn't even gonna bother to entertain that one...
"Probably would feel better with a meal in you. Did you eat today?" Like that was Cosmo's business! He was kind of hungry, though...
"We can probably just make him something when he's sleeping. A bottle can hold him over for now though, right?"
Pardon?
"Not. Little." He reaffirmed, despite this, he saw Cosmo get up and leave.
"Y'know water and stuff comes in bottles too, right Seedling?" They both knew that's not what Dandy meant.
"...fuckin' stupid," Dandy proceeded with getting Sprout cleaned up, out of the tub, and wrapped up
"You think you're o...can..." Sprout couldn't tell what Dandy was struggling to say.
"So, you know how you're not little right now?" Sprout nodded, of course he wasn't!
"And y'know how when people are...sick for example, they'll wear extra protection in order to make sure they don't stain the bed?" Sprout nodded a little slower.
"Do you think you're like that right now?"
Sprout didn't really think he was 'sick', his dizzy spells just kinda...happened sometimes. It was just normal for his head and legs to fail him. But, he guessed that fit Dandy's definition, so he accepted the extra padding alongside his pajamas. Once he was dressed, Dandy led him to bed and tucked him in neatly.
"You should really stop biting everyone,"
"Fit in m' mouth," he responded promptly.
"Then I have something for you when Cosmo is back, okay?" Sprout nodded,
Right on queue Cosmo came in, and he had a bottle in hand. Sprout no longer had the energy to pester them on all their inconsistencies and laid there expectantly, chewing on his fingers. Cosmo sat on the edge of the bed and asked him a question,
"Do you have any words for me?"
Sprout tilted his head
"Think about earlier," Cosmo waited for his response
"M' sahwee" Sprout had been a tad rude.
"...oh, I meant please, but that works too." Cosmo cuddled up to him, holding the nip of the bottle up to Sprout's mouth and he started to suck, followed by a sweet liquid hitting his tongue. He hadn't realized how desperate he was for this.
"You think you'll know what you want to eat when you wake up?" Sprout nodded lightly just to give an answer, he honestly had no idea what he wanted.
Sprout soon finished the bottle and felt a heaviness in his eyelids. He looked over at Dandy, who fished out what he thought was a pacifier? He was too tired to tell, and Dandy put it in his mouth.
"Today's gonna be a better day, okay?" Sprout whined a bit in response, and his eyes fluttered close.
"...uh, thanks for helping out and stuff,"
"I mean, it was for Sprout, I would've never helped you, dingus!"
"Oh really, never?"
Cosmo and Dandy didn't mind working together…