Chapter Text
Hyunjin is the most beautiful man Jeongin had ever seen.
He was currently face to face with a literal angel, and he was wearing an oversized t-shirt and sweats with a stain from his lunch on the knee. His hair was slightly frizzy from letting it air-dry and this man was the most beautiful man probably in the world.
That was new. Jeongin definitely wasn't homophobic, he was here in this apartment to celebrate his best friend's first gay relationship. But Jeongin had never felt this way about a man before. Surprisingly, this revelation wasn't as earth-shattering as he expected it to be when he first registered the thought. Honestly, Jeongin would be more shocked if he wasn't attracted to this actual Adonis.
"Umm… Are you gonna let me in or…?" The man spoke, jolting Jeongin out of his thoughts. He was shifting awkwardly, fiddling with the handle of the bag in his hand. Jeongin stepped out of the way to let him in.
A few cheers erupted from where the group was already gathered in Jeongin and Felix's living room, the 'party' finally starting now that everyone was here. It went seemingly, pretty smoothly. It was Jeongin, Felix and Seungmin's first time meeting Jisung's boyfriend and his friends, but everyone got along well enough.
Felix, predictably, spent most of the night flirting with Chan, bonding over the fact he was also from Australia and groping his arms. Seungmin had taken to messing with Changbin, which Jeongin was grateful for as it meant his childhood best friend was giving him some air for once. Jisung was cuddled with Minho on the armchair—Jeongin's armchair—watching in amusement as their respective friend groups seemingly slotted together perfectly.
Jeongin, on the other hand, was stood in the kitchen. He was holding a glass of water, now a gross kind of lukewarm from how long it had sat in his unmoving hand. There was a plate on the counter in front of him with an untouched pizza slice. It was too much.
Jeongin loved his friends. Trusted them. He'd do literally anything to make them happy. Sometimes Jeongin's chest hurt with how much love he had for his friends. But, this was a whole lot of change. A whole lot of new people. Four!
For most of Jeongin's life, he only had one friend. He was incredibly content with that. Seungmin understood Jeongin in a way his parents refused to, in a way his other classmates couldn't. Seungmin never judged him or asked him to suppress himself. When he was younger he never longed for more friends. Seungmin was enough.
That's why he had such a difficult time when Seungmin made a different friend. A friend that wasn't Jeongin. They were sixteen, Jeongin knew logically that Seungmin deserved a social life outside of an autistic mess who couldn't go to any of the cool hangout spots everyone else their age went to. He knew that Seungmin deserved a break from taking care of him, sitting with him as he came down from meltdowns, watching that dumb sci-fi drama Jeongin was obsessed with for three entire years and Seungmin probably couldn't stand. He tried to be happy for Seungmin.
Then Seungmin tried to introduce him to Jisung. And that was a six month long battle. Jeongin resisted Jisung's presence as hard as he could until one day, for the first time in their entire friendship, Seungmin shouted at him. Jeongin totally understood why he snapped, he was being purposely difficult because he was so scared of their dynamic changing, but he was sabotaging Seungmin's friendship in the process. After a long, serious conversation and a lot of tears, Jeongin agreed to play nice with Jisung.
Jisung was an incredible addition to their friendship. If his absolute determination to make Jeongin like him despite how cold he was wasn't proof enough, he was full of kindness and positivity. He didn't understand Jeongin as inherently as Seungmin, but he tried.
For three more years, the three became impossibly closer, a tight-knit family who didn't need anyone else. Until Jisung met Felix, an international student at the university all three of them attended together. And that was too much change all at once. Moving out, living in dorms with all new people, a new schedule, new teachers, his best friend's new friend.
But Felix took an entirely different approach, where Jisung was happy to let Jeongin come to him, Felix wrestled his way into Jeongin's heart. He could fill awkward silence like he didn't even realize it was there. He was almost refreshing.
And, honestly, this was all he needed. Each of his friends brought something different to his life. He never could've hoped to feel this whole and happy. Sometimes he truly felt like he didn't deserve them, like he could never give them a fraction of the joy and safety they gave him.
So now, he was grappling with the reality that his friend group was for sure going to expand. His favourite people in the world were having fun with people that weren't him. And he knew now that this wasn't bad, that the best parts of his life came from change and trying something new and scary and difficult. But his timeline of adjustment was going to be slower than everyone else's.
Jeongin was ripped out of his thoughts by a familiar hand on his shoulder. He leaned into it involuntarily. "You doing okay?" Seungmin peeled the—now entirely warm—glass of water out of his hands.
"Just needed a few minutes."
Seungmin's hand started rubbing circles into his shoulder blade, firm, stable pressure. Good. "You've been stood here for, like, an hour. Chan and Changbin need to leave soon." His voice is quiet, low so no one else can listen in on their conversation. Entirely non-judgemental. Concerned, sure, but if this was what Jeongin needed to do then Seungmin wouldn't question it.
"Oh" He actually had no idea it had been that long. He felt a pang of guilt. He wasn't being a great host. Jisungie's boyfriend's friends probably thought he was so weird. He genuinely hadn't spoken to any of them once since they arrived. And this was important to Jisung. And he didn't even try.
"It's okay. We already spoke about things we can do in smaller groups to help you get to know them." Seungmin's hand stopped moving. Rude. "I think you'll really like them, baby bread. Jisung wouldn't have invited them if you wouldn't" That was probably true. Jeongin knew that. He needed to keep an open mind. He could be cordial when spoken to.
Jeongin looked up as Chan approached the kitchen, carrying the empty glass and plate he'd been using. He smiled softly at Jeongin, making no move to force him into conversation. He already kind of liked him.
"Sorry I've been weird." He spoke because he felt like he had to. He added a laugh to the end because it sounded a little sad without it. Seungmin squeezed his shoulder.
"You don't have to apologise." Damn that's exactly what Seungmin would've said. "I get it. It was kinda loud in there. Felix was telling me that you're training to teach?" This Chan guy didn't seem too bad. For a split second Jeongin realised how far he'd come from when he was sixteen.
"Yeah, elementary." Jeongin understood kids far better than most people his own age. He gets the overwhelming fear and frustration and joy. He knows how to calm them and turn tears into smiles. He can manage the temper of cranky toddlers better than cranky adults.
Chan smiled again. It's a very nice smile. "I just started teaching elementary. You're gonna absolutely love it. If you ever have any questions you can feel free to ask, yeah?"
Jeongin genuinely smiled. "Thanks."
"Well, I've got school tomorrow so I'll be off." He chuckles, still smiling that very kind smile at Jeongin, looking away briefly to wave at Seungmin, who smiled back.
Changbin got up then, clearly taking that as his cue. He barely even looked at Jeongin, keeping his eyes fixed on Seungmin. "Uhh…so are we still on for next Friday?" His ears were tinted red, or maybe that's just his skin tone? Jeongin hadn't payed that much attention until now.
"What's next Friday?" He knew immediately that was rude. He wasn't a part of the conversation, merely an unintended observer who just so happened to be attached to the man Changbin was actually talking to.
"Nothing, bread." That definitely meant it was something. Seungmin had dated before. Jeongin knew that he always worried about him when he was in a relationship. Seungmin was in a constant state of worrying about Jeongin. But Jeongin had never met any of Seungmin's boyfriends. This was the first time he was even aware of a date Seungmin had ever planned. Seungmin turned back to Changbin. "Yeah, sure."
Changbin grinned, then readjusted his face into a calmer expression. That was cute. Jeongin was happy that someone was this happy to go on a date with his best friend. He waved at Jeongin.
"You wanna go back in the living room now it's a bit quieter?" He nodded.
As soon as Jeongin entered the room Jisung sprung up from his spot tucked into Minho's side. "Ayenie! We missed you." He grabbed Jeongin's arm, pulling him over to the armchair he'd been sitting on with Minho. "Go away this is Jeongin's chair." He shooed his own boyfriend away, pulling Jeongin down to cuddle with him.
It's only when he heard a chuckle from across the room that he remembered there was another person here. "Get absolutely rejected." Hyunjin. He's laughing out loud, pointing at an offended Minho—Jeongin noted he kinda looked like shocked Pikachu.
"When do you guys need to leave?" Seungmin looked between Minho and Hyunjin.
"Uhh… Whenever. I don't have any classes until midday tomorrow." Minho finally stopped gawking at Jisung and moved to sit next to Hyunjin. "And he is still unemployed."
Hyunjin immediately slapped Minho's shoulder. "Shut up I'm trying." Minho giggled, raising his hands in surrender.
"You guys wanna watch a movie or something?" His eyes definitely flicked over to Jeongin. This was better. Easier for Jeongin. No expectation to talk, no expectation to make eye contact.
The room sounded in vague agreement and Seungmin started his quest to find an inoffensive, light-hearted movie. Jeongin didn't pay much attention to whatever ended up being picked. He was trying particularly hard not to stare Hyunjin down the entire time.
At one point Jisung caught him failing miserably, curling in closer to Jeongin's side to whisper in his ear. "You know he's really disappointed he didn't get to talk to you all night?" Jeongin didn't need to look at him to know he was grinning. He poked a finger into Jeongin's side playfully, drawing a yelp out of the younger man.
Everyone's head snapped over to where they were, that was the loudest he'd been all night. "Sorry!" It came out as a small squeak. He barely noticed the way Hyunjin smiled—a gorgeous radiant smile—and exhaled a laugh at Jeongin before he hid his face in Jisung's shoulder.
"See?" Jisung huffed against Jeongin's hair before seemingly returning to the movie.
Hyunjin was definitely the most beautiful man Jeongin had ever seen.