Work Text:
Player was laying down on the bed in their inn room, a crossword puzzle book and pen in their hands.
The book had been a gift from Kyoko. They originally hadn't planned to actually fill it out, but they would've felt bad if they didn't use it at least once.
Long story short, they ended up staying up past midnight trying to finish the book. In fact, they completed a good quarter of the puzzles before they ended up falling asleep.
They crossed out another clue, their tail lightly gnawing on the corner of the nightstand as they hummed a small tune.
Just as they were about to fill in another word, their door slammed open, the pen falling out of their hands and onto the floor.
"PL4Y3R!"
Griefer's voice rang out through the room as he tried to catch his breath.
"Oh! Griefer! I wasn't expecting you to visit—"
"WH4T G3ND3R ARE Y0U??"
"...excuse me?"
He took a moment to catch his breath before shutting the door and sitting next to them on the edge of the bed.
"ME, KY0K0, 4ND F1NN H4V3 A B3T ON WH4T G3ND3R Y0U ARE."
They stared at him in silence for a second or two, their singular visible eye somehow managing to convey their complete confusion.
"...Why?"
"W3 W3R3 JUST T4LK1NG 4ND IT G0T BR0UGHT UP I GU3SS."
"And how much did you guys bet on this??"
"DUD3, L1K3, 300 TIX."
"300?!?!"
Player sits up, staring at Griefer in shock. They stammer for a couple of seconds before sighing and speaking up again.
“That's like, the stupidest thing you could've bet on,” they grumbled, running a hand down their face.
“N4H. W3'V3 D0N3 STUP1D3R B3TS TH3N TH4T.”
“Like what?”
“WH3TH3R OR N0T TH3 BL4CKR0CK K1NG 4ND MY D4D W3R3 T0G3TH3R, IF TH3Y ST1LL ARE T0G3TH3R, F1RST TO H4V3 A M4KEOUT S3SH W1TH Y0U W1TH0UT B3ING P0IS0NED, WH4T TH3 DE4L IS W1TH Y0UR F4CE SH4DOW TH1NG, STUFF L1K3 TH4T.”
They…had to admit, those were pretty stupid. In fact, they were about to tell him so before he spoke up again.
“SP3AK1NG OF, WH4T IS TH3 D3AL W1TH Y0UR F4CE SH4DOW TH1NG?”
"Oh. I'm not really sure," they mumbled, "It just kinda…popped up one day."
They remembered when they first realized it had appeared. They hadn't noticed it was there until they saw their reflection in the meadow waters.
They remembered scratching at their face, trying to get rid of the inky darkness covering it. It took them about 5 minutes to accept that it wouldn't come off to accept they'd never see the rest of their face again.
“D0 Y0U…H4VE 4NY PH0T0S OF WH4T Y0U US3D T0 L00K L1K3?”
“No. I never really took pictures of myself. Had no reason to. It's not like I had friends to send them to, anyways.”
The two sat in silence for a few moments, the only sounds being the birds chirping outside the window.
“S0RRY..F0R BR1NG1NG TH4T UP, I M3AN. I D1DN'T M3AN TO BR1NG UP SUCH A S3NS1T1VE T0P1C.”
“It’s alright. You didn’t mean anything by it,” they chuckled lightly, reaching over and putting a reassuring hand on his shoulder.
He nodded slightly, not looking entirely convinced.
The two sat, neither wanting to speak up despite the deafening silence between them.
They could see Griefer glance towards them every now and then, concern evident in his eyes. He seemed to be debating something as his knee anxiously bounced.
They watched him take a small breath before slightly turning to face them. They supposed he made up his mind about whatever he was deciding?
He seemed to hesitate for a moment before tackling them into a hug, the two of them falling back onto the bed.
They let out a small, sharp gasp of surprise, laying limply underneath the, unfortunately very strong, Griefer currently clinging to them.
They felt their hands shake. They wanted to return it. To wrap their arms around him and pull him closer. To finally be able to feel warmth again.
But they couldn’t.
They didn’t deserve such a luxury.
They didn’t deserve that happiness.
They didn’t deserve him. They didn’t deserve them.
What made them think they ever did?
They had ended so many lives.
By wanting to go home.
Ended so many innocent lives.
Because of the SWORDS.
Because of these...abominations they were collecting.
Why do they even try?
Why do they even fight back?
They’re not helping anyone.
They’re not helping themselves.
All they do is hurt others.
All they do is hurt themselves.
They should do themselves a favor.
Do them all a favor.
They should curl into a ball.
And wither.
Dissipate.
DI-
“PL4Y3R!”
A familiar voice spoke up, cutting through their HATEFUL thoughts. They reached a shaky hand up, wiping away tears that formed at some point.
Now that their eye wasn’t as blurred, they could take in the scene in front of them.
Griefer was still there, his hands sitting on their shoulders. He looked scared. Or maybe just nervous. They couldn’t really tell.
“Y0U G00D..?”
“Yea…yea, I’m fine,” they mumbled out.
It didn't look like he bought it. It was obvious he wanted to push further, but he didn't. He simply wrapped his arms around them once more.
This time, they returned it.
With shaky hands, they held on like they were scared of losing him. In all honesty, they were.
They couldn't remember the last time they were hugged like this.
Had it been their father? Their mother? Not a relative at all? They weren't sure. Their past was never the clearest.
Even still, it felt nice.
It felt warm.
A kind of warmth they hadn't felt in years.
Such a thing had been chased away a long time ago. By their own HATRED nonetheless.
He had always told them to hide that part of themself. They had long since forgotten who “he” was.
They knew IT would return.
They knew they never truly defeated IT.
They knew IT would start to corrupt them once more.
But until then, the most they could do was savor everything while it still lasted.
Savor the warmth of being loved while waiting for the warmth of everything going up into flames.
They knew they didn't deserve such a thing.
But maybe.
Just maybe.
They could allow themself to ride the swing.