Chapter Text
It wasn’t supposed to have been like this, Kara mourned. She didn’t mean to. It had been an accident. How could she have known that such a careless mistake could have these repercussions?
“Hi, I’m Emmy. You must be Alex’s foster sister.” The girl is a bit shorter than Alex with beautifully soft brown eyes, light blonde hair and a wide, easy smile. Kara blinks in surprise. This is the first friend of Alex’s that Kara has been allowed to meet since her pod landed almost two months ago (Eliza and Jeremiah wanted to be sure she had control over her strength and a better grasp of the English language, but Alex just wanted to give her time to be less weird ).
“H-hello,” she stammers nervously. Alex’s cheeks flush pink and Kara can hear her heart rate increase; it always does when she’s afraid Kara is going to act weird. “I’m Kara.” Emmy, the girl with perfectly smooth skin and little specks of sun (Kara thinks they’re called freckles) all over her cheeks and nose, holds out her hand. Kara pauses a moment, trying to figure out if she should stand first. Behind Emmy’s back, Alex is practically pulling her hair out, mouthing for Kara to shake her hand. Standing quickly, Kara grasps the girl’s hand, careful not to squeeze too hard.
“Kara. That’s a pretty name,” Emmy smiles. Kara finds it’s impossible not to smile back. It’s nice interacting with someone who isn’t Eliza, Jeremiah, Alex or the postman.
“Okay, um, Kara, Emmy and I are going upstairs to… work on… homework and, like, stuff. Studying. And things. Don’t bug us,” Alex interrupts, putting a hand on each of Emmy’s shoulders and steering her towards the stairs. Kara wants to frown. What if she needed something from their room? But Alex is gone before Kara can ask, and besides, what could she possibly need from there?
Almost an hour later, Kara realizes she needs her notebook. The Danvers had found an online educational program for Kara to enroll in until the next fall, and she was hurriedly trying to catch up on year’s worth of history lessons, grammar exercises, and math worksheets. She kept all of her notes and work in a big blue notebook which was currently sitting on her bed. Kara wanted to just march in there, grab her notebook, and come finish her history lessons on the native peoples from this region. Unfortunately, Alex told her not to come in.
“I’ll just go up there and knock,” Kara whispers to herself, tiptoeing up the stairs. She didn’t necessarily mean to overhear. Sometimes, her super hearing just… turns itself on. Kara heard two accelerated heart rates, the smacking of mouths, and breathy exhales. She pauses right in front of the door. Before she can even think of what to do, it’s like her eyes just… decide for her. Kara’s x-ray vision kicks in and she’s seeing through the wooden door.
She didn’t want to. If Kara had any say, she would not have the image of Alex- her surly, bitter, and secretly caring and protective older foster sister- being straddled by Emmy. Kara would have never violated Alex’s privacy like that, but it was like watching a car crash (a phrase Kara had proudly picked up from her avid watching of daytime television). She couldn’t stop watching as Emmy pulled Alex’s shirt from her body. Clumsy hands and hushed noises of pleasure. After a moment, Kara has the decency to look away and hurry back downstairs.
Sitting in the living room, Kara ponders what she’d just seen. Of course it was natural. On Krypton, there were no boundaries to love. Men could marry men, or women, or people who preferred neither title. Kara had been struggling to figure out if there were the same rules here. She smiles to herself, please that it was true.
Still, it was rude to spy, so Kara didn’t mention anything when Emmy left later that afternoon, just smiled politely and waved.
It happened over dinner. Kara didn’t mean for this to happen. She had just been sitting, eating her third helping of chicken and rice when the conversation shifted to Alex’s friends. Namely, Emmy.
“So, Kara, you met Emmy today. First of Alex’s friends,” Eliza grins after chatting with Alex about their progress on their studies. “Was everything alright? Was Emmy nice?” Kara’s ears detect an increase in pulse, and Alex’s cheeks have started to burn. Kara can tell by the sound of fingernails scratching denim that Alex is the nervous perpetrator. Kara smiles at her to show that she has no ill will towards Alex’s choice of partner. She takes a moment to find the right words.
“Alex’s girlfriend is very nice,” she finally says. Eliza and Jeremiah laugh while Alex clenches her jaw, cheeks flaming red now.
“Kara, I think you’re a little confused. A girlfriend is not the same thing as a friend who is a girl,” Jeremiah corrects. Kara frowns in confusion (she hates these subtle nuances to the English language. Why can’t they just say what they mean? ).
“Then what is it called when a girl who is a friend is also a girl who you kiss and hold in romantic ways?” Kara asks. Alex drops her fork, mouth open in shock.
“Kara!” she shrieks.
“Alex?” Eliza asks at the same moment.
“What?” Kara asks, bewildered. No one answers her.
“Alex, what is she talking about? Is Emmy- are you- what’s going on?” Jeremiah asks, fiddling with his hands. Alex turns to Kara, glaring.
“You spied on us, you freak?” The words have venom in them, more than Kara’s ever seen. Hot tears prick at the corner of her eyes. What did she do?
“Alexandra!” Eliza yelps. “What is she talking about? Are you and Emmy… Are you dating?” her voice quiets for her last questions as if she’s trying to force herself to calm down. Tears are splashing against Kara’s cheeks now, hot and salty as Alex glares at her, muttering her hatred softly enough that only Kryptonian ears can pick it up.
“Emmy and I… Yeah,” Alex whispers after a few moments of tense silence. Suddenly, Alex is crying, too. “I’m sorry,” she cries, shoving her chair away from the table and sprinting out the front door before Kara or anyone else can even think to stop her.
“What did I do wrong?” Kara whimpers as the slamming door reverberates through the room.
Eliza had taken Kara up to her room while Jeremiah took the car out to look for Alex.
“You didn’t do anything wrong, dear, except using your powers to spy,” Eliza says firmly. “You had no way of knowing it was a secret.” Kara wipes at her tears with the back of her hand, clutching the blanket to her chest.
“Is Alex in trouble?” A thousand unspoken questions weighed heavily on her tongue. Is what Alex did wrong? Why can’t a girl kiss a girl? Will Kara be ostracized if she kisses girls like Alex? Why is this something bad? Why did Alex cry and run away? Why did Alex have to hide this?
“No,” Eliza answers vehemently. “We love Alex. This is not… Some people… don’t like what Alex does. Some people think that men only love women, and vice versa. But regardless of what others say… Alex is our daughter, and we love her, no matter what. Just as we love you,” she adds. Kara chews on her lower lip thoughtfully.
“Is she running away? Will she come back?” Eliza’s mouth quirks up mirthlessly.
“Midvale is only so big, Kara. Jeremiah will bring her home. Go to sleep. It will all be fine in the morning.” Eliza tucks Kara into bed, stroking her hair until Kara closes her eyes. Once the lights are off and the door shut, Kara waits. Listens. Footsteps receding, the sounds of Eliza settling into her work desk, the clinking of glassware signalling Eliza pouring herself something to drink. Kara counts to five before climbing carefully out of bed. As she opens the window and uses her powers to float harmlessly to the ground, Kara listens further out, trying to find the distinctive sounds of Alex’s heartbeat. Alex’s breathing. Finally locking in on it, Kara sets out to find her. This was her mess, accidental as it was. And she has to be the one to fix it.
Kara finds Alex on the beach, hidden near an outcropping of rocks, perched on the edge of a rock and staring up at the sky. Kara settled down next to her wordlessly.
“You ruined everything,” Alex states. Kara flinches away from the words. “Now, they’ll never let me see her. They’re going to send me away, and I won’t be able to see any of my friends. You ruined everything .”
“I didn’t mean to,” Kara argues weakly. The words are weak, soft and light enough to be carried away by the sea breeze.
“You never mean to, Kara,” Alex snorts. Kara knows enough to realize that Alex is not laughing happily. She sits up and Kara mimics the position, drawing her knees to her chest. “You never mean to break things, or freeze things with a sigh. You never mean to do anything. But that doesn’t make it better!” Alex huffs angrily, running a hand through her hair.
“Why do you think they’re going to send you away?” Kara decides to switch tactics.
“Because, what Emmy and I feel… A lot of people think it’s unnatural, or wrong. Emmy said she heard about these camps they send kids like her- like me - to, and it changes them. She wanted us to be a secret so that we wouldn’t have to go there. But now, my parents are going to send me away and I’ll never see my friends again,” Alex laments. She rests her chin on a knee.
“Eliza says that no matter what, they love you. And that you’re not in trouble.” Alex looks over at her sharply. She narrows her eyes, pursing her lips. Her parents would probably say anything to make Kara feel better when she fucked up.
“Even if that’s true,” Alex hedges carefully, careful not to get her hopes up, “my friends will probably hate me. Or their parents. Everyone at school. And now I don’t even get the chance to tell anyone myself because you took that from me.” Alex huffs in frustration. She had finally managed to stop crying, and then Kara shows up and here come the damn waterworks. Typical.
“Do not cry,” Kara says softly. She reaches out to wipe the tears away and Alex is startled. She knew that Kara’s skin was impervious to harm, but she’d always imagined it like a layer of metal armor. Surprisingly, it was warm and soft to the touch. “On Krypton, people can marry whomever they want. People are free to love.”
“That sounds nice,” Alex sighs. Her heart clenched and a stray breeze made her shiver, so she scooted closer to Kara, pleased when her foster sister put an arm around her- but only because Kara was warm and she was cold, of course. They’re silent for a moment.
“There was a song back on Krypton. My mother and father used to sing it to me when I was frightened. Would you like me to sing it to you?” Kara can feel Alex nodding, and starts to sing softly. Alex doesn’t understand the words, but the tune is soft, and Kara’s voice is gentle and lulls her into a peaceful trance. When she finishes the song, Alex exhales in contentment. She doesn’t know how long she sits there like that, leaned into Kara’s shoulder and just breathing.
“Let’s go back home,” she finally says. Alex isn’t sure what’s going to happen next. Maybe her parents will send her away. Maybe they won’t. Maybe her friends at school will hate her when they find out. Maybe they won’t. All Alex knows is the warm pressure of Kara’s hand in hers, pulling her up the path and back towards the warmth of her house- their house.