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A faint trail of clouds stroked the bluest sky, the sun high up above the virus. Failing to detect any noise, they assumed that none of their peons were currently at their base, (an abandoned warehouse.) Initiating their fans to cool down the summer heat, they went to their room to wait for a certain robot.
They were so close to achieving their goals. The droid’s body was in perfect shape to be the best peon Badware could ever drive. It made their core heat up in glee to think about having such a polished minion. All Badware had to do was not mess things up.
Badware had already befriended the government robot, enough for it to trust them enough to come over to their base. And then it would fall for their trap; the oldest trick in the book! They knew this would greatly help them in their goal, and they thanked the robot in advance. Since they had figured out how to deal with firewalls, they were ready to get what they needed.
Flopping down on the mattress of their room, they played a laughing track on their speakers. When it stopped playing, they sat up and tried to detect if the robot had arrived.
Hacking into the security cameras of the base, they switched to the front of the building. Angelware was walking inside, probably back from another round of killing. But they also noticed a familiar figure, red and black…
Yes, that was Killdroid! Perfect, they thought to themself. Getting up and running to the front to greet them, they felt their core heat up again. They always felt overheated around it for some reason, though they always assumed it was coincidental.
“[ HELLO BADWARE, ]” the robot said in a monotone voice, facing the virus. Putting on its friendliest face, Badware grinned. “HELLO_KILLDROID! HOW_ARE_YOU?”
Killdroid didn’t move an inch while speaking, unphased. “[ WHAT IS MY PURPOSE OF BEING HERE? IS THERE A TASK I NEED TO FULFILL? ]” it asked, tilting its head. The robot acted like it didn’t know what social interaction was, which for some reason annoyed the virus. Badware knew it would probably be easier to hack it anyways, but still… They had their hopes up. Stupid.
Badware shook their head. “NO, NO! I_JUST_WANNA_HANG_OUT!”
“[ AH, I SEE, ]” Killdroid replied. “[ I AM NOT USED TO BEING YOUR… ‘FRIEND’. ]
Instinctively grabbing the robot’s hand, Badware dragged Killdroid over to their room. Killdroid kept a firm grip on their hand; something that they kind of liked.
“WELCOME_TO_MY_ROOM!” they said, proudly showing off their messy room to try and impress the droid.
“[ IT LOOKS LIKE A GARBAGE DUMP. ]” Killdroid somehow, despite barely showing expression, was unimpressed. Pretending to look offended, Badware gasped. “DOES_NOT!”
“[ YOU NEED TO CLEAN THIS PLACE UP. OR I’M NOT COMING BACK TO THIS TRASH BIN OF A ROOM. ]
Actually getting offended, they shoved Killdroid. Badware sighed. “WHATEVER. JUST SIT NEXT TO ME SO WE CAN WATCH SOME EPIC SHOWS!”
Metaphorically rolling its eyes, Killdroid watched as the virus picked up their remote from the ground and switched to some weird forum website thing. The brand name was titled “TubeTube.”
Leaning back on his singular pillow (what a psycho,) Badware watched mindlessly as the colors flashed on the screen of the TV.
“[ CAN’T YOU JUST PLAY THAT ON YOUR SCREEN? WHY DO YOU HAVE A TV? ]” Killdroid grumbled. Badware chuckled like that was a stupid question. Shaking their head, they switched their face to a laughing emoticon. (XD)
“WELL_YEAH, BUT_THAT’S_BORING! AND_PLUS, BETTER_FOR_GUESTS!”
“[ WHATEVER YOU SAY… ]”
An hour had already passed. Shit. Badware just remembered what they were gonna do. Right, they were gonna hack the robot. Turning to Killdroid, they noticed that the robot was practically shutting down from boredom. Perfect, he supposed.
“HEY_KILLDROID? LET_ME_TRY_SOMETHING…”
“[ WHAT IS IT? ]”
“JUST_CURIOUS_HOW_YOU_WORK! CMON’, I_DON’T_BITE!”
Killdroid nodded, gingerly letting the virus do what they liked. Opening up its chestplate, Badware looked around to try and see what they could do. Pulling a wire, Badware checked to see what it did. To their surprise, the robot let out a grunt at what they did. And the virus liked it. Why did they like it… “[ DON’T PULL THAT. ]”
“…SORRY.”
Placing its metal legs at the sides of the droid, Badware examined its wires and circuits. The craftsmanship behind the government robot was actually quite impressive. Badware wondered who built it, and if they could find more models like this. Maybe Badware could get an upgrade.
Something about the moment felt weirdly intimate. Is this something human friends do? They assumed not. And why did they feel so warm?
Halfway through trying to see if there were any shut down buttons or something in its chestplate, Badware paused. “WHY_ARE_YOU_EVEN_LETTING_ME_MESS_WITH_YOUR_WIRES…?”
Killdroid shrugged, then turned its head to look away. “[ I DON’T KNOW. IT FEELS… NICE. ]
That made the virus heat up. They couldn’t power their fans any faster to cool themself down. What were they even doing? Why were they feeling this way? They had one purpose. They were here to take the robot over.
“RIGHT. YOU_DON’T_MIND?” Badware grunted, weirdly meekly. Killdroid nodded, letting the virus do as it pleased.
As much as they tried to just build up the courage to just hack the damn robot, something about it was different. Maybe it was too valuable for it to hack. Getting out of their straddling position on Killdroid, they shut the chestplate. They couldn’t do this. What were they even trying to do anyways…
“OKAY_FORGET_THAT_HAPPENED,” they murmured, sitting back down on the mattress. Killdroid seemed indifferent, like always. “[ OKAY. ]” Luckily, the robot listened to their command.
They went back to playing stupid cat videos on their TV, trying to forget whatever the hell they were trying to do earlier. Despite the image of Killdroid beneath them still lurking in their mind, they calmed down a bit. Turning to Killdroid, they decided to spark up some conversation.
“SO_DO_YOU_HAVE_ANY_HOBBIES?” they asked the droid, smiling. Killdroid shook its head, to the virus’s surprise.
“REALLY…?”
“[ DO YOU HAVE ANY? ]”
“HACKING, DUH!”
“[ THAT’S NOT A HOBBY, BADWARE. ]”
“WHATEVER,” they barked, laying down. “IT’S_STILL_A_SUPER_COOL_THING_I_DO, SO_IT’S_A_HOBBY!”
“[ DO YOU DO ANYTHING OTHER THAN HACKING? ]”
That question caught the virus offguard. “…WELL_OF_COURSE! I… I_ALSO— UH…”
They paused. Did they actually do anything other than hacking?
“[ DON’T YOU GET TIRED OF HACKING? ]”
“WHY_ARE_YOU_ASKING?” Badware demanded in a defensive tone. Killdroid lay down next to them, staring at the ceiling. Their hands brushed for a moment, Badware hearing the clank of metal against metal.
“[ I GET TIRED OF PROTECTING THE PRESIDENT SOMETIMES. ]”
“REALLY…?”
“[ YEAH. THAT’S WHY I’M WITH YOU RIGHT NOW. I.. LIKE BEING WITH YOU. ]”
“[ YOU’RE SO MUCH DIFFERENT THAN HIM. ]”
And then that triggered that stupid sappy feeling in Badware’s core. They felt like they were gonna do something stupid if they kept feeling like this. They hated the feeling that robot gave them, so why did they stay?
“THANKS.”
“[ I SUPPOSE IF I COULD FEEL THE MOST HUMAN FORM OF ‘JOY’, I WOULD FEEL IT RIGHT NOW. ]”
Badware cracked a grin. Feeling for Killdroid’s hand, they found it and intertwined their fingers sneakily. They didn’t know why or what they were doing, but they started to care less and less.
They didn’t have the ability to feel as well as how a human could, but they savored the feeling of the robot’s hand in theirs.
“MAYBE_I_SHOULD_START_DOING_THINGS_THAT_AREN’T_HACKING.”
“MAYBE_LIKE_RIGHT_NOW.”
Killdroid nodded blankly. But Badware could tell the robot was happy. At least happier than the usual indifference. They could still hear the meowing on the speakers of the TV.
A few more minutes passed, until Badware felt the robot let go of their hand. “[ I HAVE TO GO. ]”
“OH… ALRIGHT. BYE!”
“[ I HOPE TO SEE YOU SOON… MY… FRIEND, ]” it said, standing up. Badware was still laid down on the mattress as Killdroid shut the door, leaving the virus alone with its thoughts.
Weren’t they supposed to be hacking the robot..? They had completely forgot what to do. For some reason Killdroid always messed them up like that when it was near.
But they didn’t regret that day. Not at all. So what were they feeling that made the droid so much more different? What was this sensation they felt when the two touched, even for a split second? It must be jealousy for how perfect the robot was. Or maybe it was fear. Or anxiety. God, they didn’t know.
They hated that feeling so much.
They kinda liked it too.
They liked it a lot.