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There were multiple reasons Garroth wasn’t a fan of his subordinate Dale’s drinking habits, and it wasn’t always about the job. The thing he hated most was when the bearded drunk would rope him into his bar nights; for when Garroth gets drunk, he gets bold, and some of the parts of himself he wishes to keep hidden make great effort to rise to the surface. If it were as simple as just saying no he’d never end up in situations like this, but on this particular night the elder guard had nothing to do with his lack of sobriety. His friend Azura was visiting and she had insisted they both take a night off, since both of them were prone to overworking themselves.
The following morning, Garroth regretted how much he’d had to drink the night before… but he could never regret what it led to. Especially not after waking up in the arms of the one who his heart truly longed for.
“Garr..” the man says, shaking his shoulder lightly. His voice is dripping with honey and his body is perfectly warm underneath Garroth’s own “Garroth it’s time to wake up.”
———
Phoenix Drop Barracks, 12:40 a.m.
It was another sleepless night for Laurance Zvahl.
Ever since his Shadow Knight transformation, vivid nightmares have plagued his sleep and since he doesn’t need it for survival like humans, he often avoids it. The second in command sat in a chair at his desk trying to read a book Cadenza had recommended, but his mind was elsewhere and he could not focus enough to comprehend what he was reading. He groans in frustration and slams the book shut at the same time a weak knock sounds on his door and he perks up.
‘Who in the hells is at my door this late?’ he wonders silently before getting out of his seat and approaching the birch barrier.
He opens the door and safe to say what he saw was the last thing he was expecting.
“Garroth..?” the Shadow Knight gasps “Is everything alright?”
He takes in the sight of his very clearly intoxicated superior. To say it was a shocking sight would be an understatement, which is why Laurance was worried. Getting drunk out of his mind seemed like the type of thing that Garroth Ro’Meave would only do if he was under some kind of extreme stress or despair.
But he wasn’t crying.. He wasn’t even frowning. And that look on his face, Gods above— it was the brightest smile he’d ever seen from the blonde. Some part of him wishes the image would never leave him. Those hazy cerulean eyes– his brightly pinkened cheeks, flushed from the warmth of the ale, along with that Divine-be-damned smile on his face were a sight to behold.
At least Laurance thought so.
“LAURRRANNnnnceeee!” he slurs excitedly, leaning into the doorframe as he struggles to keep upright. The way he perks up he sorta looks like a delighted puppy.
“Irene’s sake Garroth! How much have you had to drink?!” the brunette asks, helping his first in command to stand up straight.
But as soon as Laurance tries to take his hand off his superior’s shoulder, he starts to lean forward again and Laurance has to catch him before he faceplants on the stone floor. Garroth laughs– No, giggles!
“Mkay, there’s no way you’re making it up a ladder and I am not even letting you attempt it, which I know you would–”
Laurance is interrupted by another giggle from the gorgeous man in front of him and he pauses and sighs “Alright, get in here, Giggles.” he says, helping him keep his balance while he guides the man inside and onto his bed. Garroth only bubbles with more sweet laughter as Laurance does this.
Garroth slumps back onto the mattress, letting his head fall to the pillow. Laurance sits down on the bed at his side and it is then that he notices his lingering cerulean gaze. His eyes had never deviated from the brunette as he assisted his commander, and now that Laurance is looking back at him, the same beaming smile from before makes a return and the Shadow Knight can feel his face heating up. He only hopes that Garroth either can’t tell in the dim lighting or that he doesn’t remember his likely obvious blushing come morning.
The older guard just stares at Laurance with that saccharine grin on his face and Laurance can’t find any words. At least none that are appropriate for the situation. The Shadow Knight has to snap himself out of his thoughts, that started to wander a little too dangerously for his liking. He couldn’t possibly make any kind of move with Garroth in this state. That would be wrong of him.
And so the younger man settles on the typical “teasing banter” he uses with the blonde, which everyone assumes is just his casanova personality, but in actuality, he’s flirting. He is unsure if Garroth is aware of this fact, however.
“See something you like?” Laurance manages in a playful tone despite the thumping of his heart and scornful thoughts surging his mind.
And damnit it took everything in the younger man not to act on those thoughts after what happened next.
It happened quite fast. Garroth’s expression dropped into one of… something Laurance couldn’t quite place. His smile was gone and his eyes became intense and thoughtful. For a short moment he just stared, and before the Shadow Knight could even open his mouth to ask him what was wrong, Garroth was propping himself up slightly and pulling Laurance’s face closer to his by the collar of his cotton tunic. Laurance was frozen in shock. His mind was blank and his heart was racing. The blonde licked his lips to signal his intentions, looking at Laurance’s own just a couple inches away as he seemed to consider his actions for a few short seconds. The brunette was sure he would decide against it when he gave him a consensual nod.
But then he closed the gap that separated the two. Laurance felt dizzy, struggling to process that Garroth was kissing him. He almost thinks he’s dreaming but there’s no denying how real it felt. Because it was. Laurance couldn’t possibly pass up the chance to finally get a taste of Garroth Ro’Meave. He lets himself give in, kissing the freckled blonde back ardently. And Gods, Laurance wishes he could kiss this man forever; though in Laurance’s mind, Garroth wasn’t just a man. He was everything. He was the sun, the moon, and all his stars and the Shadow Knight would worship him as such until the end of his days if the other allowed it.
The taste of ale on the older man’s tongue just makes the exchange more intoxicating, with Laurance knowing how Garroth gets when he drinks. He’s aware the blonde becomes confident and almost carefree, leading him to do impulsive things. Nothing improper or even particularly inane. Nothing he wouldn’t want to do when he was sober.
And that is the thought that is making Laurance’s head spin.
The thought that this is what Garroth truly wants but is too scared to act on without the aid of alcohol. Laurance begins to lose himself in the idea. He breaks away to catch his breath for a few seconds and Garroth whines softly. His eyes held disappointment, but Laurance can’t have that. The brunette gestures Garroth sit up a bit more and positions himself in between the former prince’s tan thighs, then he dives right back in, attacking his superior’s mouth with the same fire as his sword when they spar together.
Laurance runs his hands up the toned arms he’d been dreaming of holding him since the day he met the Divine sent deity, before he settles them into his blonde curls. Garroth drags his hands up and down Laurance’s chest, seemingly struggling to figure out where to place them. Laurance grabs one of his hands and directs it to the back of his neck, the blonde brings his free one to the younger man’s face, holding him in the perfect place while he devours the Shadow Knight’s lips.
They both pull away after another moment; disbelieving, breathless, and blushing. Bulging sky-tinged irises meet widened sea blue ones, both men seemingly struggling to grasp that this was reality.
Both of them had dreamed of this moment but neither were aware they were shared dreams. Laurance isn’t even sure that this is genuinely what Garroth wants, and he soon reminds himself that it would be wrong of him to keep.. whatever this was going while he was under the influence. It takes everything in the brunette to put his hand out to stop the other guard from grabbing at the bottom of his shirt as he was hoping to remove it.
The confused and slightly hurt look Garroth gave him did nothing but send a pain to Laurance’s heart, but he could never live with himself if he took advantage of him. He loves this man far too much to let him continue, in the chance that he might wake up frantic and full of regret.
“I– I… can’t.” Laurance sighs somberly “I’m sorry, not like this.”
“S-sure yOU can! I’m lettinggg youuuu!” the blonde explains, taking hold of Laurance’s upper arms in his hands, and by Irene did it feel like they fit there just right. But sleeping with someone when they weren’t of sober mind was not right.
Laurance removes himself from Garroth’s grasp and back to the side of the bed like before “I-I know but, Garroth you’re… you’re drunk. I can’t let you do this. Not now. It…. I promise it’s not because I don’t want to..”
“Iss alright, Laur…” Garroth slurs, the rejection clear in his tone “Don’t have to lie to me..”
His face falls once more and if Laurance's heart wasn’t cracking before, now it was shattering to pieces for the guard he held such affection for. He doesn’t seem to believe his words and Laurance isn’t sure how to prove it to him. But damnit, would he still try.
“I promise you I am not lying. I would never lie to you! Not about this, not about anything!”
But Garroth still doesn’t buy it. He refuses to meet Laurance’s eyes as he attempts to get the other man to look at him.
“‘M sorry.” he says just above a whisper as tears start to break. Despite Garroth’s best efforts, he still chokes out a sob “For.. ruining this..”
With that Garroth starts to slip out of the bed and head for the door. Laurance wasn’t expecting an escape attempt, and especially not one so fast in his condition.
“Garroth-! Listen to me!”
He gets up quickly and grabs the commander’s wrist, to which Garroth turns back and gives him a glare and shakes free, determined to leave. Luckily, the Shadow Knight is fast enough to step in front of the door right before he reaches it.
“Garroth, please! I promise. I swear on my father’s grave— on Ungrth’s, I’ll do anything to prove it to you! I– I love you, Garroth.” he blurts; quiet, but no less true “And if you don’t remember those words tomorrow, I’ll tell you again, and again. I’ll say it over and over until you believe it. I will be whatever you want me to be, whatever you need, though.. I’d love it if you were my partner–”
“Then why don’t you… want me?” the former prince blurts out. The pout of his lip would be amusing if it wasn’t for the glossy eyes full of dejection that were so full of joy and life mere minutes ago.
“I- it’s not that I don’t. I do, Garr, you actually have no idea..” he says with a pitiful chuckle “It’s because I love you that I can’t let anything more happen between us tonight. I need to be sure this is what you want.”
“You… think I don’t wann’ this? Because I’m a little drunk…?”
“Well.. I- First off, this is not just ‘a little drunk.’ You, Sir, are sozzled. And second.. I was certain there was no way you could feel the same until now. I’d rather we start with a date first. Or at least maybe a sober conversation?”
Laurance spoke with a warm, comforting tone, and he couldn’t stop the slight chuckles that had escaped him as he did. He’s worried that Garroth is going to take it the wrong way, but he seems to be able to grasp his reasoning. He looks intensely into Laurance’s diamond eyes, searching them for any hint of dishonesty, seemingly finding none.
“You.. really want to be with me?” he croaks.
“Absolutely. If that’s what you want. But only if you decide you still want that after you have sobered up. Okay?”
Garroth nods in understanding. His face lightens up a little, and so does the tension that was surrounding them.
“Alright, good. Now, I’m still not too fond of the idea of you attempting to make it to your room, so just for my peace of mind, would you sleep in here? If you’re still upset, I can leave you be. I wasn’t planning on sleeping tonight anyways.”
Garroth gives him an incredulous look, but it only lasts about a second or two before it shifts into one of rememberance. Laurance snickers knowing he’d forgotten he doesn’t require sleep to function anymore.
“I’m not upset. And I can stay.”
“Thank you.”
Laurance makes sure he doesn’t fall as he gets back into the bed, though it’s evident he’s not as woozy as he was when he first showed up and he’s able to make it okay and get settled without the help of his lieutenant.
“Goodnight Garroth. We’ll talk in the morning okay?”
“Y-yeah okay..” he says looking up at him with his head on the pillow and Laurance standing by the bed, looking right back down at him and running his fingers through the curls around his face. Laurance was getting deja vu from his thoughtful expression.
“Hey- don’t hide from me. Is there something you want to say?” the Shadow Knight asks, low and gentle.
Garroth blushes and his mouth stays open, as he tries to find the courage to utter the words. “Would you..”
“Would I…? What? Please talk to me, Garr!”
“Well.. It’s just.. I know you don’t need sleep, but.. I was wondering if– if you’d stay in the bed with me. I don’t want to wake up alone…”
Laurance didn’t give a verbal response. He didn’t need to. He just lifted the blankets and gestured his arm for Garroth to scoot over so he could get in too. Garroth moved over a bit and they settled in. Garroth sat up until Laurance laid down so he could cuddle up and rest with his head on the other man’s chest.
“Is this okay?” the blonde asks, though he’d already buried his cheek into the brunette.
Laurance lets out a soft chuckle and wraps his arms around the older man, finding comfort in comforting him. One of the lieutenant's hands strokes his hair and scalp and the other rests on his lower back.
“Yes. More than okay.”
Garroth had one arm behind the pillow underneath Laurance and his other near where his own head was resting on the younger man’s chest. It was quiet for a few moments, save for contented sighs and hums, and crickets chirping beyond Laurance’s window.
Laurance breaks the silence by gasping slightly and taps his commander's arm lightly a few times. Garroth shifts a bit and grunts, almost having succumbed to his need for sleep. “Sorry just one more thing before you fall asleep.”
“Hm?” The blonde lifts his head slightly and opens one eye to try to keep himself awake.
“Do you… want me to wake you before the other guards so.. So that no one sees you leaving my room in the morning?”
Garroth seems to take a moment to begrudgingly work his own brain for an answer.
“Yes. Not because the other guards. Just like to be ready early.”
Laurance smiles and nods “Alright. I can do that. Now let yourself fall asleep. Especially if you’re gonna be up so early.”
Garroth smiles too and rests his head back on Laurance’s chest. “Good night, Laur.”
“Night Garr. I’ll be right here when you wake up. I love you.”
And even though he’d already had a sneaking suspicion, Laurance couldn’t help the giddy feeling he got when the last words Garroth said before drifting off were “I… love you too.”