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Kevin found himself on his knees, hands clasped together as he murmured praise, repentance and confession all together. His words becoming more jumbled as a sharp heel pushed into his skin.
Tears stung his face as his vision became hazy, but the red silhouette of his district leader was still clear enough— it was evidence of his sins, after all.
“Kevin,” said the demonic voice, leaning down to lift Kevin’s chin as the man’s voice gave out and his body let out a shudder, “can you remind me why you’re here?”
The red-clothed man looked down with a smirk, ginger hair falling so naturally, Kevin may have believed this to be real if the outfit itself wasn’t so—
so..
…
“God created man and women to be together—“ he choked out, another sharp jab from a red heel. “and— Do not have sexual relations with a man as one does with a woman; that is detestable” he said, his eyesight becoming more and more blurred.
In his tears he felt the sharp pain suddenly leave his body, nearly crying out in relief till he felt the other man’s body crouch down instead, pushing an apple to Kevin’s mouth.
“Elder Price, open wide” the demon said with a smile, pushing the apple till Kevin felt his mouth fall open. “Bite, boy” said the voice, and as all good mormon boys do, he listened.
“How is it, Elder Price” the voice said, condescending but still as enticing as the real one, “is it fun to give into sin?” The ginger asked, allowing Kevin to eat the apple, but not allowing him to talk. He just stared at Kevin with the same blue eyes as the real Connor Mckinley.
“Y’know, Elder Price, I was so excited to meet you—“ the ginger trailed a finger along Kevin’s jawline, with a look of admiration?
“—but seeing you now…” he tossed the apple to the side and inched closer to the boy, still on his knees, still praying as his hands falter. “You’re just so cute, who knew the golden mormon could be so perverse? Fantasizing about other men… oh, even fantasizing about being degraded by those men, you’re despicable”
The dark-haired boy felt his breath hitch and his face flush as the other began to laugh, dropping his hands down to Kevin’s thighs as he remained paralyzed. “Your district leader, no less. Oh.. you’re really pathetic, who knew you could fall so low?”
Demon-Connor seemed to have decided to end his berating, and opted for standing up, dragging Kevin with him, allowing the man to be freed from the position that left his knees sore.
“How about we do this again, in another context?” said the freckled man, leaning into Kevin before the man felt his body jolt awake.
—
Kevin lay still, staring up at the ceiling as if it can undo the dream he just had.
His face was hot, and he knew he was sweating much more than he usually does when waking up from a dream.
It was too early in the morning to go out into the kitchen, so he just stayed in his bed and prayed (hah) he would fall back asleep without another dream like that.
—
In the end, he did fall back asleep, and actually woke up without sweat dampening his sheets.
It was early, but Kevin still decided to bring himself to his feet and walk into the mission hut’s kitchen, avoiding thinking back to the dream he just had.
Which proved much more difficult when he realized the only pair of mission companions up at this time appeared to be Elder Thomas and—
Elder Mckinley.
Kevin felt his body tense up as he made his way to the counter, setting up the kettle to boil some water for coffee as the other pair sat at the table, talking over 3 pop-tarts, that appeared to be pushed more towards Elder Thomas (it probably wasn’t healthy, but no one is going to fight the other Elder over it).
While trying to focus his attention on the kettle, Kevin felt a presence besides him but didn’t dare look to see who it was, only letting his suspicions be confirmed when the other man started talking.
“Elder Price, good morning!” Elder Mckinley greeted, smiling— a much different smile than from the dream, Kevin’s mind supplied.
Composing himself, Kevin sought to respond to the man with a small nod, hoping to avoid conversation, but the ginger did not seem to take the hint
Elder Mckinley leaned in closer, close enough Kevin could feel his hair brush his, leaving the dark-haired man to suppress a shiver as the other stared down at the kettle with a quizzical look.
“Elder Price, what are you making for breakfast?”
Kevin shuffled, moving a slight bit away from the other, putting enough distance that he could breathe again. “Coffee, do you want some?” He asked, wary.
Elder Thomas looked up from his spot at the table, pop-tart in his hand, “with water?”
Kevin fidgeted with his hands, “yes— with water” he mumbled, wondering if he did something wrong.
Elder Mckinley looked at Price, sincerity on his face “water? I always thought coffee was like hot chocolate… water or milk, but always milk!”
Price nodded slowly, “well, I don’t actually know if water is right, but it tastes good”
“Well if it tastes good, then you can do whatever you want” Elder Mckinley said, standing closer to Kevin once again, mouth too close to the man’s ears.
Kevin froze in place, listening to the creak of a chair as Elder Thomas exited to head back to his room, leaving him alone with the district leader.
Elder Mckinley began, “So, Elder Pri-“
“Kevin” he blurted out, “call me Kevin”, correcting his district leader— oh, that’s embarrassing, but—
It was worth it so see Mckinley’s smile somehow grow wider, “alright, Kevin, call me Connor then” the man said with a hand on Kevin’s shoulder, ignoring the growing flush on his face.
“So, did you sleep well?” Connor asked, as if trying to make small talk, but he was probably trying to make sure all the elders are sleeping peacefully after everything that happened, it was sweet, really.
But Kevin couldn’t hide how he looked away and instinctively moved his hands to guard himself down there. “Mhm, fine” he mumbled, hoping the water would boil quicker.
“Kevin, are you sure?” The other asked with concern, concern quickly dismissed by Kevin when he realized just how much he liked hearing his name come out of Connor’s mouth.
“Y-yes!”
Connor looked at Kevin with uncertainty, but dropped it. He still stood by Kevin’s side silently once the water was done, watching as he made coffee the same way he has been since they’ve been excommunicated.
“Kevin, are you sure you slept okay?” Connor whispered once the kettle and mug were both placed safely on the counter, knowing Kevin would jump at the question.
“I mean— I’m still having hell dreams, but it’s fine..” Kevin muttered, knowing his lying is as bad as every mormon and ex-mormon to exist.
Connor didn’t even try to hide his shock as he looked at the other, “still? Oh, that must be terrible” he places a reassuring hand on Kevin’s shoulder, “if you ever need to talk, I’m here, you know that, right?”
Kevin turned to face Connor, hand falling off, “no, no! I mean, they’re not really bad anyway” he said, hoping to divert the conversation, he did not want to talk about his dreams. Like, they’re the type of hell dreams everyone else had, but— they were also kind of exciting, and, oh, Kevin does not want to start thinking about them right now.
“…a hell dream that—“ Connor stared back at Kevin, confusion written all over his face, “—isn’t bad?”
Kevin suddenly felt even more self conscious, trying to drink his coffee as a free hand fidgeted with the hem of his pants. “Well, I guess not hell dream. Just a dream in hell that’s— like— just weird, not bad. Not bad according to my terms, I think”
The district leader seemed to have picked something else up from that statement, face flushing a sweet pink and— oh— oh no, that is not what Kevin was going for, even that is still a bit far off but.. easier to explain in the end.
“uhm, alright El- Kevin, you.. enjoy your coffee” Connor said before quickly leaving, heading back to his shared room with Elder Thomas, leaving Kevin to stand there with a half-empty mug in his hand and a headache.