Chapter Text
Most love was spontaneous and loud, popping out from behind boxes in the corner or bursted out of the petals of flower bouquets. It resided in the excitement and peeked into the relationship, watching and waiting for the next dramatic gesture that would be sure to make somebody blush. But not this love. This love wasn’t normal. The love between you and Chan was woven through gossamer strands and lived atop the shelves inside the cupboards in which teas and mugs were stored, waiting to be shared together. It found its home in between the cushions of a sofa where a soft night was spent with slow kisses, a faintly glowing tv and a room that made noise want to be silent in hopes of staying unnoticed. Your love was quiet, but it wasn’t boring. Your lives were chaotic, sure, but you learned to appreciate both the loud and the quiet. You somehow found comfort in the beams of concert lights and steadiness from beating drums and felt at home in the midst of the hustle and bustle of a backstage area. Sure, you loved differently, but not any less.
***
“Fuckkkk,” was the first thing you let slip on the morning of the concert you had been waiting to attend for months. Your phone was buzzing nonstop on your bedside table and it took every ounce of willpower that one has at seven in the morning to roll over. The caller id read your best friend’s name and the fact that it was her made it a little more bearable to answer.
“Today’s the day!” she practically shouted once you picked up. “You finally get to see your man in real life!”
You laughed as much as one could after being awoken involuntarily. “Good morning to you too,” you grunted.
“You know, I’d think someone who’s seeing her idol within the next twenty-four hours should at least sound a little more excited than that,” she seemed to scold. “Do you have everything ready yet?”
You dragged a hand down your face. “Oh my god, I literally just woke up. You’re acting like it’s my wedding day or something!”
“Close enough,” your best friend answered. “You’re seeing Bangchan!”
You used every bit of your courage to stand up and get out of bed, before placing your feet on the frozen floor and rushed over to the thermostat on the wall, imputing the temperature you had wished the floors were before you got up. Your concert outfit sat on the hotel room desk, neatly spread out with everything from the clothes to the accessories and you smiled, running your hands over the fabric before you returned to your call.
***
Of course, since you had flown in all alone, you didn’t have anybody to eat dinner with, so what was the use of going out? Actually, going for dinner in a new city sounded wonderful, but the smarter side of your brain reminded you that you’d be much too tired if you attempted to go out several times and you wanted to save all of your energy for the concert. Plus, you were staying in the city for several more days after so you could explore later.
You ripped half of the seal off of the Buldak noodle bowl and soon after groaned after realizing that you had no chopsticks. Or any utensils for that matter. The hotel room had no kitchenette, so your only option was to go downstairs and ask someone at the front desk.
After grabbing your bag, throwing on grey sweats and a matching cropped zip-up hoodie, you slipped outside of the room and quickly strode towards the elevator, where—sadly—about six teenage boys were crowded. You narrowed your eyes. They were loud, obnoxious and…tall. You shook your head and turned back around, heading for the stairwell.
Before reaching the door, another figure in front of you snuck out of their room and silently shut the door, then made their way towards the stairwell. You shrugged. He wasn’t a group of teenagers and he didn’t seem loud either, judging by how he shut his door, so you kept walking and watched as the stranger stepped through the doorway to the stairs and followed him in not long after.
You waited for the click of the large metal door behind you before descending the stairs to get your beloved utensils. Your feet had only taken three or four steps when the man in front of you stopped. He turned around.
Oh no. Oh no no no no no.
“Here to escape the elevator teenagers?” Chan teased in a thick, endearing accent. “They were there earlier too.” His tone was calm and relaxed. It felt like you had stepped out into a balmy summer night full of stars as his voice encircled you.
You blinked at him, too stunned to speak…or keep going down the stairs for that matter.
“Y’alright?” he asked.
You nodded frantically and rushed down another step, much too quickly and stumbled down about half a dozen more, a startled yelp falling from your lips. You thought for sure that you were about to meet your end by crashing into a cement wall at the end of the flight of stairs, but strong arms caught you before you were able to do so.
“Shit! Are you okay?” Chan steadied you, practically placing you upright.
You groaned. “I’m sorry! I could have hurt you right before your concert and—”
Chan smirked. “So you do know who I am,” he drawled.
“I—well I…”
“Are you going?” he asked. “To the concert, I mean. Will you be there?”
“Yeah.” You smiled. The two of you began walking side by side. “I couldn’t miss it for the world. Your role model only comes to your country so many times, you know.”
“I knew it!” Chan pumped a fist in the air.
“Knew…what?”
“I’m your bias.” he giggled like a kid, a grin spreading across his face.
“And how did you know exactly?” you asked.
Chan’s eyes trailed down to where your bag sat in the crook of your arm, an old NoEasy era photocard of him with bright orange hair dangling off the strap. You gasped and covered the photocard up with your hand as quickly as you could. He laughed again as the two of you neared the stairwell’s exit door.
“What’s your name?” he asked impulsively before pushing it open.
“It’s Y/N,” you answered.
“Y/N,” Chan repeated, testing out the name on his tongue. “I hope to see you tonight then,” he declared.
You were about to say that you hoped to see him too, though that was stupid so you kept it inside. “You go first,” you told him, gesturing to the door. “There could be other stays.” You knew it was best for idols to keep a low profile and you didn’t want to start any rumors at all.
“Thanks,” he mumbled and looked back at you once more before shoving the door open and stepping through.
“Good luck tonight!” you managed to shout after him, but the door had already shut. You covered your mouth with one hand and muffled a shriek. “Oh my god!” Moments later, you slipped into the hotel lobby, got your chopsticks and pretty much skipped back up the stairs to your room like Dorothy on her way to see the Wizard of Oz.
With your first slurp of spicy noodles, only one thing came to your brain as you mindlessly grinned. Thank you elevator teenagers for making me take a detour.
***
“Thank you very much!” you told the Uber driver lady after stepping out of her car at the concert venue.
The first thing you saw was an ocean of red and black. As far as you could see was overflowing with stays and the sight made your heart feel like bursting. After all, you were finally with the people you belonged with.
You traded photocards (not the NoEasy one of course), gave out the little freebie bracelets you had made and just talked about skz to anybody who would listen. You felt at home with everyone and it was wonderful. You didn’t think the smile slipped off your face the entire time.
Soon enough, it was time for you to make your way inside the stadium since you obviously didn’t want to miss the anthem. You were lucky enough to score a ticket close to the stage, but not in the front row. You were closer to the little bits that extended from the main stage where the members would later sing Cover Me.
Your leather outfit boosted your confidence from the moment you had slipped it on hours earlier and many stays had already complimented you. You knew this was going to become the best night of your life. It was practically already set in stone when you clicked on the “buy tickets” button on your laptop months earlier. Now you were there, about to live through an entire Stray Kids concert.
You stood in the spot you had bought with anticipation, your lightstick in hand, waving frantically. You weren’t even going to think of your arm the entire night. Pain could wait. Stray Kids (Bangchan) could not.
A familiar guitar riff blared over the venue’s speakers, a sound you had only ever heard on videos and still couldn’t believe you were hearing in real life. The audience erupted into cheers at the first couple notes of the anthem (and probably Felix’s whisper) along with you and you were overwhelmed with so many emotions you could barely function.
Then the intro to Mountains was playing and the same man you had conversed with in the stairwell was singing before you and you were using all of your willpower not to burst into flames.
***
Oh. My God. Was all that your mind could manage to repeat. The members were circling the audience with those large trolley/cart vehicle thingies and they were about to go right by you. You! You were anything but tired even though the night was almost over, but you didn’t let the sadness sit yet.
Each of the members had their respective skzoos attached to their clothes and they all seemed to be having so much fun. It was then that it hit you that they were basking in their own glory. Stray Kids had come so far and you had the privilege of watching as they appreciated all of their fame and hard work which had gotten them there in the first place. The eight talented souls you loved so much were now realizing how and why and you wanted to cry at the beautiful sight.
I Like It was playing and you sang along with the members and other stays, watching them jump and dance like little kids. Or just happy idols. Both worked. You couldn’t take your eyes off of Bangchan. Sure, he had been your bias since forever, but after really meeting him in real life, you couldn’t help but appreciate him even more.
He waved at all of the stays before him and giggled when they each showed them their tiny wolfchans. He took the keychain of the little wolf character off of his beltoop and gave it a kiss, then tossed it into the crowd and much to your surprise, it’s path led to right in front of you.
You caught the wolfchan keychain and held it to your chest and looked up at Chan. He winked and you blushed.
Then the stays began to swarm you.
“Can I have wolfchan?”
“OMG I GRAB IT FROM HER!”
“Why would he give it to her?”
“I want the wolfchan keychain!!!”
Stays, put simply, were another breed.
“Back up from the poor girl, my god,” another stay shouted over the swarm of jealous girls (and guys). “All she did was catch a plush toy. It’s not her fault!”
You thanked the girl with your eyes and the stays seemed to back up a bit. But you had the wolfchan and he had spotted you, not them. You grinned to yourself.
***
3812.
That was the number written in black permanent marker on the wolfchan’s tag. And you knew what it meant.
After getting back to the hotel after the concert, the first thing you had done was rewatch all of your videos. Then you changed into an icy pink colored sweatset and just stared out the window for what felt like forever. But then you looked down at the wolfchan in your palm and noticed the number written upon the tag and you almost dropped it in shock.
Now you stood outside room 3812 which was down the hall and your fist was raised, poised to knock. What if it was the wrong one? Or what if he hadn’t gotten back yet? Or was everything a scam? A trap? Your mind wasn’t in a good enough place to function. Honestly, you thought it was still back at the concert.
But you knocked anyway.
Three firm taps against the door later, it swung open and you hurriedly stepped inside. Chan shut the door behind you and smirked. “I was wondering if you’d ever show up,” he teased.
You rolled your eyes. “As if I wouldn’t,” you told him. “After putting on a show like that,, it would be impossible not to want more.”
Your confession caused him to huff out a breathy laugh. “It was almost as great as my aim, wasn’t it?”
“I mean, you seem like the person who is great at everything, Chan. But the concert…it was unreal. You were unreal.”
He ran a hand through his hair with a chuckle. “I think the most unreal part was opening my door to find you there waiting, but to each their own.” He shrugged with a flirty grin and began to tug you into the living room.