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For the first time in weeks, Nico dreams. Ever since he and Leo had gotten together, they’ve eluded him and left him to sleep peacefully.
But this time, they’ve come back with a vengeance. He opens his eyes to find himself back on that fateful day when Gaia rose.
The day Leo died.
The day he thought he’d lost him forever.
He was back near the onager that Octavian had used to catapult himself into the stratosphere, frozen in time. Nico couldn’t do anything but watch as Octavian raised his knife, aimed right at the release wire.
Goodbye, Gaia! Octavian had yelled. Goodbye, Jason Grace, the traitor!
In that moment, Nico had held himself back. He’d listened to his father’s word, that some deaths shouldn’t be prevented.
If that was true, then some deaths were inevitable.
Octavian cut the wire, and the catapult arm sprang upwards, hurling straight towards the sky.
And Nico couldn’t do anything but watch as the payload, carrying Octavian, disappeared into the storm clouds above, and the sky exploded in a dome of fire.
= = = = =
Nico sat up with a gasp, breathing heavily like the air had been punched from his lungs. It took a moment to get the ringing of the explosion out of his ears, but he gathered himself enough to remember where he was.
Bunker Nine, in Leo’s bed. The room felt warm - it was always warm in the bunker - but also cold at the same time. Nico felt like a part of him was missing, and looking around, he realized with a pit of dread building in his stomach why.
Leo was gone.
“Leo…?” he called out. Maybe Leo was just in the bathroom or something. This was just him being paranoid.
But there was no answer.
“Leo?” he called out again, getting off the bed. “Leo, are you there?”
Still, nothing.
His breathing began to quicken, his heart rate beginning to rise. He opened the door to the rest of the bunker, speaking loudly this time. “Leo?”
His voice echoed down the walls, and he waited.
But he didn’t hear anything. Nothing but his rising breathing.
Nico began to walk through the bunker, calling out Leo’s name. It was dark, but he could see fine (being a son of Hades had its perks). He spoke his name loudly and clearly as he weaved through tables and inventions, but he never got a response back.
Fear had taken a hold of his heart at this point. Did a monster manage to take him in his sleep? Killed him or possessed him to do their bidding? Did Thanatos forgo his promise and take Leo back down to the Underworld?
Or had Leo gotten sick of him and left him for good?
The last thought sent a shudder through Nico, feeling colder at the thought. He could almost handle the thought of Leo dying, if it meant that he died loving Nico. But just thinking about Leo being tired of him, hating him…
It was something he couldn’t even bear to think. It made no sense, but Nico’s mind twisted and scrambled his thoughts together until they formed an amalgamation of scenarios that all ended with Leo’s scowling face.
He’d broken into a run at some point, narrowly dodging tables and bits of metal as he searched desperately for any sign of Leo. Degrading words swam in his mind, clouding all rational thought until it was all that remained.
Leo doesn’t love you.
You don’t deserve him.
He’s sick of you.
You should just-
Nico turned a corner, and there, in the doorway to the recent expansion of the bunker that was a small kitchen, was a warm light.
“Leo!” Nico cried out, relief flooding through his entire body, drowning out the sinister thoughts. The clattering of plates was a sound that soothed his nerves, and Leo’s voice, filled with nothing but worry, was all that Nico needed to reassure himself.
“Nico?” Leo called out, coming into the doorway. “Is that-”
Nico tackled Leo into a tight hug, nearly sending them to the ground. It knocked the wind out of Leo’s chest, though he quickly returned the hug once he realized who was on him.
He was panting like he’d run a marathon, eyes wet with tears his mind hadn’t registered until now. Still, Nico couldn’t focus on anything but the warmth in his arms, the real body beneath him, and Leo.
“Woah, hey, what’s wrong?” Leo asked, which just made Nico sob. It wasn’t tears of fear or panic, but rather tears of joy. Joy that Leo was still here, still alive, still loving him.
Nico buried his face into the crook of Leo’s neck, breathing in the smoky scent that always seemed to cling to him. The smell never seemed to go away ever since Leo had died, and while Nico hated it before since it reminded him of his death too much, now, Nico couldn’t cherish it more than he did now.
“Nico…” Leo murmured, his voice softer as he brought them to the floor. He helped Nico into a more comfortable position in his lap, holding him close.
He didn’t try to ask what was wrong yet, didn’t try to wring the answers out of Nico. Instead, Leo just held him tight, whispering comforting words that well and truly broke the lingering thoughts that had broken him down.
“You’re with me.”
“You’re safe now.”
“I’m here for you.”
“I love you.”
By the time his tears had run dry, Nico was breathing normally again. His eyes were shut, repeating Leo’s words of love in his mind over and over again.
It was still hard, believing he was capable of loving and being loved, but with every whisper of praise, every kiss to his cheek, every hug and instance of holding hands, and every declaration of love, Nico was beginning to believe it.
“Hey…” Leo whispered, bringing Nico back to reality. He cupped his cheek, tilting his head, making him look up. “You want something to eat?”
Nico nodded his head. “Just a little, though…” he said quietly. Leo gave him a warm smile. He stood up, helping Nico to his feet and into a stool.
Leo didn’t try to start a conversation, instead going straight behind the counter to begin cooking. Nico wasn’t ready to talk much either. His throat felt dry and his stomach empty, so he just sat back and watched.
A few minutes later, Leo put down a plate with a small portion of food. He gently squeezed Nico’s shoulder before sitting down next to him, grabbing another bowl off to the side and beginning to eat.
They ate in comfortable silence for a few minutes, letting Nico gain his rational thoughts again. Once his stomach was sufficiently full and his brain organized enough, he sighed.
Leo paused in his eating, looking over at Nico.
“...I…” his voice cracked. “I had a dream about… when you died.”
Leo remained quiet, though he reached out a hand to gently squeeze Nico’s arm. He took that as a sign to continue, taking a deep breath. “I woke up to you missing from bed, and… gods. I just started to spiral. I couldn’t find you anywhere in the bunker, and then I started thinking that you could be dead, or maybe-” his breath hitched. “That you didn’t love me. That you left me and abandoned me and that I didn’t deserve to have you in my-”
Leo’s hand drifted down to gently squeeze Nico’s own hand. Nico let out a shuddering breath, squeezing his eyes shut to rein in his thoughts. When he opened his eyes, he turned his hand over to interlock their fingers. “...But I found you. And you’re here with me.”
A slow, soft smile came to Leo’s face as he squeezed his hand. “I’m here,” he said, bringing Nico’s hand up and turning it to press a kiss to the back of it. “And I’m never leaving you. That’s a promise.”
Nico let out a soft laugh, leaning in close to kiss him. Leo met him halfway, cupping his cheek with his other hand. The kiss was long and unspoken with promises, of their love intertwined and vows to never leave each other.
When they parted, they were both out of breath. They held each other close, foreheads pressed together, their breathing mingling together. Then Leo broke apart, just enough to kiss his forehead. “Cuddle?”
Nico sighed, letting Leo hold him. “Please.”
They went together, hands interlocked, holding each other close. After a quick trip to the bathroom, Nico was falling back into Leo’s bed, into Leo’s arms. The missing warmth filled him again until he was whole, until the thoughts that threatened to break him were quiet.
Leo held him, not too tightly, but comfortably. One of his hands laid in Nico’s hair, gently tugging away tangled strands and combing through the locks.
“I’m not leaving, okay?” Leo whispered, “I swear I would never leave you, not if I had a say in it. I’ll leave you a note if I have to go. I don’t want to worry you.”
Nico nodded into Leo’s chest, looking up at him. “Promise me you won’t.”
“I promise,” Leo said immediately, and there was no doubt in his voice, “I promise I’ll never leave your side.”
Nico felt himself drifting off again, so he just nodded once. He reached out to grab Leo’s other hand, settled around his waist. He pulled it up and laid them on the side of the bed, before interlocking their fingers together.
“I love you.” Nico murmured. Leo smiled back at him. “I love you too.”
And that was all Nico needed to close his eyes and drift off into a blissful, dreamless sleep.