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People look at me now and they see the bassist from Mayhem. Middle class, nice apartment. They don't see the kid who grew up in the concrete suburbs of Oslo, fighting for every breath. I was born into a working-class family. My mother were busy, tired. I wasn't the golden child. So I learned early that if you want something, you take it. If you don't take it, someone else will. The streets raised me more than any parent did. I was hanging out with the wrong crowd by twelve. Junkies, thieves, hooker.guys who knew how to get what they needed without asking permission. You learn fast in those circles. You learn who to trust, who to avoid, and how to talk your way out of a beating. Street wisdom. That's what I call it. It's not book smart. It's survival smart. It's knowing when to keep your mouth shut and when to swing first. It's knowing that everyone has a price, and everyone has a weakness. Sometimes I look at these kids in the metal scene now, with their perfect hair and rich parents buying them vintage amps, and I want to laugh. They think they understand darkness because they bought a Cannibal Corpse shirt. Darkness is being fifteen and wondering where your next meal is coming from. Darkness is watching your friends overdose in a squat. Darkness is learning that the world doesn't give a shit about you, so you have to make it give a shit. I survived. I got out. Not everyone did.Who's laughing now?
下面是中文
人们现在看我看到的是mayhem的贝斯手。中产阶级，不错的公寓。他们看不到那个在奥斯陆水泥郊区长大的孩子，为一呼一吸挣扎着。我出生在一个工人阶级家庭。我的母亲很忙，我又不是含着金汤匙出生。所以我很早就明白了，如果你想要什么， 你就得接受它。如果你不接受，别人就会接受。街头对我的养育比任何父母都要多。十二岁时，我就和这群人混在一起了。瘾君子、小偷、妓女、那些知道如何在未经允许的情况下得到他们需要的东西的人。在这些圈子里，我很快就学会了！我学会了信任谁，避开谁， 以及如何从挨打中脱身。街头智慧。这就是我所说的。这可不是书上学来的，这是生活教会你的。它知道什么时候该闭嘴，什么时候该先挥棒。它知道每个人都明码标价，每个人都有弱点。有时我看到现在金属场景的这些小登，有着漂亮的头发，富有的父母给他们买了vintage放大器。 我想笑。因为他们买了一件Cannibal Corpse衬衫他们就认为自己理解黑暗了。黑暗是十五岁，不知道你的下一顿饭从哪里来。黑暗是看着你的朋友蹲在那里服药过量。黑暗是知道这个世界根本不在乎你。 所以你必须让它在乎。我活了下来，我是幸存者，我逃出来了。不是每个人都能做到的。看谁能笑到最后吧！